Emily - posted on 06/04/2009 ( 38 moms have responded )
Moms and stepmoms have a lot going against us. Women have a harder time with the idea of children bonding with someone new than men do. We've just gone through divorces that are often very ugly and have battled with our exes in ways that bring out the worst in everyone. Then there's the pervasive assumption that moms and stepmoms just can't get along - we're bound to be enemies.
I believe that we need to change our fundamental assumptions about co-mama relationships. A good woman in your child's other home can be your best ally. Early in our stepfamily relationship, my therapist told me that women often end up getting along better with each other than the two biological parents do. We're both women! We didn't divorce each other! If we can get past the stereotypes it's often easier for us to see eye-to-eye.
If you're already a mom or stepmom who has build a cooperative relationship with your wife-in-law :) please join our forum at Co-Mamas / Step-Wives, where we celebrate and share the ways we went from sworn enemies to cooperative co-parents. If you have dreams of getting there someday, let's discuss those here. What can we do to help our children live without parental conflict, or at least with a lot less?
I look forward to talking to you!