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I am so frustrated with my daughter's father.

Briana - posted on 04/12/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

5

0

We've had joint custody since she was 3 months old. There has been so much turmoil between our families since before she was even born. Last year we went back to court, his visitation was restricted to every saturday from 10-6:30, with him not being allowed to spend more than half the visit at home, because he was leaving her there with his mom. He was made to spend time with her, made to call her every night. Yet still doesnt follow the court order. She doesnt even want to go, shes 5. He pays $55 a week in child support, which helps but doesnt go to as much as i need it to. I work 3 jobs. I had asked him to help me out with 1/2 of a summer program, that could be beneficial to her before kindergarten in the fall. He told me no, he can barely live and to use the child support. He lives at home with his parents. Now am i wrong to be a little miffed that I make sacrifices, pay for just about EVERYTHING she needs and wants, yet he is not willing to ?? He enjoys a nightlife, cigarettes, and everything else, yet cant help out with that?? Wants more time, but doesnt spend what he does have with her...

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4 Comments

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Tyesha - posted on 04/24/2012

2

7

I know this will probably sound mean..but never expect the non custodial parent to do more than what they have to do. I think that you should do what you have to in order to provide, protect and love your child. Dont argue with him or ask him for anything. I would also let the judge know that your daughter doesn't want to spend that much time with her father. Dont stress about what you can't control. You cant make him be a better father or give you more money. Thats how I learned how to deal with my childs father

Rebecca - posted on 04/14/2012

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I know exactely what you feel like. My ex has not payed a dime in child suport and will make me feel like a horrible mother because my daughter and I live with my parents bc it is all I can afford.

He doesn't pay, hasn't seen her since January, has another kid and not told us, tried claiming my daughter on his income tax. It is ridiculous.

Briana - posted on 04/12/2012

5

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unfortunately, ive tried and his visitation was reduced. He STILL doesnt spend the time with her, lets his family, who have had cps involved before, spend the majority of the visit with her. Im stuck between a rock and a hard place at the moment and im just so annoyed with it all.

Louise - posted on 04/12/2012

5,429

69

This is pretty normal I am afraid. Fathers get away with paying a pittance towards there childs costs. If your daughter does not want to see her child I would not force her to. Speak to a lawyer and tell him your daughter is reluctant to go and see if he can have the visitation rights reduced. This still means that he has to pay whether he sees her or not.

Sounds to me like he wants his daughter but not the cost. I think you are a fantastic mother holding down three jobs and raising her, unfortunately this is the way it is going to be. Mum providing finances and the love and support she needs.

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