My ex has the custody and lets him watch..

Janne Helen - posted on 05/25/2011 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I have just come to know that my ex lets my 6 yr old son watch Pirates of The Caribean. I am Norwegian citizen and we have age limit for that 11 yrs pluss. How do I deal in telling my ex to not let him watch movies like that? ... Have I no way in saying since he has custody of him? In reality I don't speak with my ex only through a friend after the divorce. So how could I get my friend to send the message accross to him? Should I contact child services to help me out with this? ... I want my son to be safe and not get traumas from watching movies and play TV games way too early.

Thanks for the help in advance.

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Christina - posted on 06/01/2011

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Ummm, are you serious about calling social services because he is letting him watch Pirates of The Caribean? Wow.
He has custody. He has the say in how he raises him. Read your custody papers and it will tell you what you both are allowed to dictate. But seriously, I think you need to chill out. It's not like he is letting him watch porn.
If you had custody of your son, you would be pissed if he was telling you how to take care of him. And I bet you don't like your ex telling you what you can or can't do with your son when he is with you. He has the right to make parental decisions, even if you don't like him. You can either go by the rules his dad makes (since his dad has custody) or you can have your own rules at your house.

Beth - posted on 05/26/2011

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You can't tell him what he can or can't do unfortunately! The only thing you can do is not allow any of it in your home! Let your child no that you don't think it's appropriate and it's not allowed at your house! Child services will not do anything about your ex-husband allowing your child to watch a movie like Pirates of the Caribbean or the video games! They will only get involved if he was allowing him to watch x-rated movies and even that is hard to prove!

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All of my children LOVE Pirates of the Caribbean! I do not believe there is anything wrong with allowing them to watch this saga of Pirates! They love Jack Sparrow - Johnny Depp is one of their favorite actors - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Alice In Wonderland, Pirates... There are definitely movies Depp acts in that they can't see.
Why is it so wrong if Disney has a ride that inspired the movies and children go on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride every day all year long?
Now, if it were a horror movie, R Rated film, or worse, I can understand. If they were to watch Harry Potter - would that be a big no-no for you as well?
I am not trying to be a witch, just simply curious... Sorry if I offend you. Is it really a law?

Sahbi - posted on 06/06/2011

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Well stated Beth Johnson. Ladies remember some things arent worth fighting or debating over. Kids are tramatized by bickering parents more then any movie or video game.

Lucy - posted on 06/06/2011

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hello Janne. i can imagine how you feel. and it sucks. i suggest you talk to child services. but be prepared because am sure they will need realy hard evidence. and if i may ask how do you know he watches these movies? if he talks about them maybe that can be enough evidence. am not sure. but talk to child services ASAP. and YES you have a say in all that happens in your childs life HE IS YOUR BABY TOO....... sorry for the caps . i have a son too and i feel realy strongly for this. i hope it works out for the best. good luck.

Haley - posted on 06/05/2011

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Yeah I don't see the issue here either really.... Sheltered children are often the ones who end up in the trouble you are trying to protect them from, simply because they are not educated enough on an issue that they are making a choice on. I raise my children by being open about all subjects especially things they come home asking about. It creates a trust between them and myself that no one else has with them so that when they have a tough choice to make they come to me. And movies are just a start to ways to have your children exposed to the outside world. You don't want your child to have culture shock when they find their selves around a group that is a little different from the normal situation at home! I let them watch most movies but if there is anything I think they don't understand good or bad I explain it to them and have found the more open I am with them the more open they are with me!!!

Jennifer - posted on 05/30/2011

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you personally need to have better contact with yoru ex. how do you discuss teh child if you do not speak with him personally?

as for movies - my son is not yet 5 and has seen many movies not for his age. I ensure that I watch them with him - everytime - so that I can answer any questions that he has concerning what he is watching. he never watches a movie that I have not already seen and have decided is something he can watch. if you are concerned - the only thing you can really do is ask his father to ensure that your son is not scared, that any questions he has are answered and to truly think about what movies he is aloud to watch

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