Kathryn - posted on 09/20/2012 ( no moms have responded yet )
I'm a step mother, a mother to a 3 year old with another on the way. My step daughter and I have always had a good relationship. I met her when she was 4 and have been in her life ever since. She respects me and always has because I have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to talking back or not being held accountable. She does not have this same standing with either of her natural parents. She talks back to her mom and dad all the time and I'm getting increasingly frustrated with how she treats them. I have more say in what she does under my roof (which is 75% of the time since we have primary custody) but it bothers me that she is allowed to treat them this way. Long story short, I'm the bad guy now. The closer I get to having baby #2 the more I'm working from home and the more I see her. She often asks her Dad if I'm home when he picks her up from school. When she doesn't know I'm around, she treats him like dirt. This attitude is worse after summer break. She spends her summers with her mom and step dad and we do know that their parenting is different than ours. I also see that her mom has zero respect for her dad so I get the feeling that my step daughters attitude and treatment of her dad is coming directly from her mom. 1) does anyone else have a similar issue? 2) how have you managed? 3) is there a solution that doesn't involve pitting one house against another (My biggest pet peeve of all time) I don't want my relationship with my step daughter to be one of fear or walking on egg shells but I do feel the need to instill in her that she has to respect the adults in her life. Thank you all for any help.