Helen - posted on 10/11/2009 ( 15 moms have responded )
My daughter came home on Thursday and was crying. She doesn't want to visit her dad as much anymore and wants to spend more time at my house. Because we have "Shared" Custody this makes the situation a bit more difficult. She is a cheerleader and wouldn't go on Saturday because she knew her dad was going to be there. Today she sent him a text message 4 1/2 hours before she was to go over there, because she doesn't want to talk to him, and told him that she wanted to stay at my house this week. He called me and wanted to know what was going on. I let him know that she has been very upset and that she said all he does is yell at her and that now that his girlfriend is back (she was gone for 5 months) that he doesn't care about her and doesn't have time for her. I let him know that her emotional welfare is more important to me than anything. He called the police and told them that I was refusing to bring her back tonight. I did let them know that I never said that and that I had no problem bringing her back. I let them know that she has been crying and upset and told me that she was scared of her dad and didn't want to go back. The police told me that kids make up stuff and that she just needed to go to see a counselor. I told him that I knew that but because her father does not agree with that, it makes it more difficult to do that. He told me that I needed to just schedule all the appointments when I have her and take off work to go. I told him that I too have a full-time job to support my children and that I just cannot up and leave work because her father doesn't want to bother with her. So I took my daughter to her dad's, and she was very upset about going. The police were sitting there waiting for me to make sure I came. I would love to take him back to court, but money is tight and I can't afford a lawyer. I did tell my daughter to start talking with the school counselor so that this would be documented. I don't know what else to do to get the custody changed. Do I call the police every time he doesn't bring her back in time and if she is not over here when she is to be? How do I get custody changed if no one with listen to me? She is almost 12, doesn't her opinion matter for anything? What do I do?