3 year old peeing in her bed

Samantha - posted on 03/13/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Please help! I am at my wits end with my 3 year old daughter who has been going to her bedroom and peeing in her bed some time during the day. She is able to use the toilet and open and close the doors. We have tried reasoning with her, punishing her, offering incentives, praising her when she does the right thing - I don't know what else to do. Before she started going to her room, she went through a stage where she would just be playing in the lounge or her sister's room, and just do a pee wherever she wanted, the floor, the rug, the lounge suite. I'm getting desperate. I'm sick of washing all the bedding every day, and it's getting diffcult to constantly make the beds as I'm pregnant with my 3rd and suffering a lot of siatica. Please please please someone give me some ideas on what to do?

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Zaklina - posted on 03/13/2010

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I think that your second daughter is big enough for potty/toalet training too. maby if you start training her and reward her with something when she will do it right than the older daughter will understand what is going on and will do it too. I have 2 son`s (3 and 2 years old) and both of them toalet trained on 20 months. With my yanger son it was easier, he always wanted to do everuthing his brother does. They are 15 months difference and they copy eachother actings.

Rebecca - posted on 03/13/2010

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o, and one other thing that might just work is for her to tell you when she needs the loo and you can go with her ... this is a step back, but not as drastic as nappies... maybe she wants some extra attention from mum...?

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Storm - posted on 03/13/2010

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I'm only just getting my oldest toilet trained, she always goes to the toilet during the day, except for occasionally at day care when she'll be so busy doing other things she'll forget, but she still wears nappies at night... she also announces (like she did just this second) when she's going to the toilet...
One thing I used to have to do a lot was tell her to go to the toilet, she's whine and carry on but she'd go and we didn't have any accidents... except for nap time when we try to practice sleeping without a nappy.

Rebecca - posted on 03/13/2010

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o, poor you! that's a toughy. my 3 year old when initially being potty trained would stand in the middle of the room and watch herself peeing on the floor (luckily we have wooden floors) and she would laugh her head off about it --- it was soooo frustrating. we asked her why she was doing it and she said it was funny; we were clearly NOT amused, but she was tickled pink.

at that point we decided to go back to nappies for a while and try again later. another 6 weeks went by and we tried again; this time of course she had accidents but we did not have the cocky deliberate bad behaviour.

does she know you are pregnant? have you given her lots of reassurance that she'll always be your beautiful girl and you will always love her? have you told her that her love and your love are gonna grow EVEN BIGGER to accomodate the new baby? etc etc ... i obviously don't know for sure, but i suspect it MIGHT have something to do with anxiety about a new baby coming....

Samantha - posted on 03/13/2010

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Thanks Erika. She has been toilet trained for a while now, except at night time when I put a nappy on her for bed. Some days she does get immersed in what she's doing, but I don't believe that's it. It's like she purposely goes to her bed to do it. When I ask her why, she says it's because she couldn't open the toilet door, but I know she can - she can open almost any door inside the house, and undo the privacy locks! The problem with me putting her back in nappies or pull-ups is that she strips them straight off again during the day. I have trouble keeping her in clothes full stop during the day LOL. But I've told her I'm going to put her back in nappies if she does it again. I'm not trying to rush her into it before the next one arrives, as I also have a 20 month old daughter who isn't ready yet either - will cross that bridge when we come to it lol. But thank you so much for your ideas - I am going to attempt the nappies again next time she does it

Erika - posted on 03/13/2010

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As a 3yo she should be able to tell you why? I know the hardest thing for me to say is to stay calm and try not to yell but have you tried to put her back into pull-ups/ nappies? Sometimes that might be seen as a set back but I know my Daughter didnt want to go backwards to be a little girl, she sees the toilet as a BIG girl thing! Also she sometimes was so deep in concentration on what she was doing that she forgot about the toilet. Just take your time cause she will get there, there is no time limit!!!

PS My daughter is 3.5, Son 2.5 and another Son turning 1 next month. I know it would be easier to have her fully trained before the next bundle arrives but I tried to push and I was set back 6 months. Good Luck!

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