Funny Phrases From Our Little Munchkins

Emi - posted on 02/05/2009 ( 52 moms have responded )

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I think that this is the most interesting part of childhood for our little ones. They have just enough vocabulary to convey a message but often dont realize how funny some of the things are that they say. I got the idea for this discussion the other day when I took my 3 year old son Seth skiing. At the end of the lesson I was changing him from his long underwear (with breifs underneath) to his jeans. As he was in nothing but his underpants he turned to a lady sitting at the table next to us, who would have been about 50 years old, and screamed at the top of his lungs "Dont look at my penis!" The lady looked shocked and mortified but I just thought it was hilarious.



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Cassondra - posted on 07/07/2009

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yesterday we asked our son, "do you wanna go on an airplane ride?" he said, "no. i'm too big". ?? what!

Alison - posted on 07/06/2009

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A couple months ago, I got a free night at a local hotel for the family. The hotel had a nice pool, which was the highlight of the stay. Recently, dd asked her dad if we could go to the hotel (essentially, she wants to go to the pool). He replies, "it costs lots and lots of money to go to the hotel". She went in the kitchen and found my wallet, went back to him and said "papa, I found money. Now can we go to the hotel?" (There was about $.50 in there)


... little sweety!

Jessica - posted on 07/06/2009

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Sounds like something my son would do. My son is 3 going on 8 some days and isn't potty trained. After giving him a bath one night and dried him off he took off on me before I could get a pull up on him he takes off into our living room goes up to my husband and turns around so his butt is facing my husband and says daddy look at my naked butt I laughed so hard and my son gave me that look like okay mom what was so funny

Dawn - posted on 07/03/2009

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We were out shopping and were just pulling into our last stop when my daughter noticed we were stopping and asked if she was going in too (since it was just me in the car with her and her baby sister, this was a bit of a no-brainer!). I saind "yes" and she held up her feet and showed me she had just removed her shoes...again. I told her, "Mommy doesn't like it when you take your shoes off like that." Her response? "Gasp....if you don't like it you can get your money back!"

Natalie - posted on 06/26/2009

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My 2 1/2 y.o. has a photo of her grandparents on their wedding day on her bedside table. The other night she said 'Nanna and Poppa married' "Yes they are" 'Nika is married' "oh? Who are you married to? To which she replied 'A prince!

LeeAnn - posted on 06/25/2009

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I was in tears laughing so hard at some of these replies!! I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter, and a 14 month old daughter. Our youngest is breastfed, and quite a bit chunky, so I call her "big butt" sometimes. One Sunday morning, when getting our oldest up, she said "Hi Big Butt!!" at the top of her lungs to me....me and my husband were hysterical!! I never expected her to repeat this, let alone call me that.....I wish I could say she was wrong.

Ashley - posted on 06/19/2009

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I took my 3yr old into the dressing room with me while trying on clothes. when I dropped my pants, my underwear went down a lil too. My daughter yells to the top of her lungs..."I see your crack, jack!" I never wanted to leave the dressing room...

Stacey - posted on 06/13/2009

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There are so many funny stories in here, I'm having a hard time keeping a straight face. My almost 3 y.o. is such a little parrot that obviously you have to watch what you say around her. If she is being particularly naughty, I would normally say something like "Mummy is really angry right now and doesn't want to talk to you for a few minutes" etc etc. Her deal is now if she doesn't like something the attitude comes out and "Mother I'm really angry with you right now!" very difficult to keep a straight face when she is trying so hard to be so angry.

Rachelle - posted on 06/10/2009

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My daughter just this morning while I was driving to the doctor looked across at her 9 month baby brother and yelled mommy baby brother has an elbow on his knee and she looked disgusted.

Kristina - posted on 06/01/2009

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These stories are all hysterical... Here's one from last night my daugher and husband were playing before bed I gave the 5 minute warning and when it was time my husband said ok its time for bed. My daughter said "back away dada" with that she stood up, stuck out her belly as far as she could and aimed it at him and said "Care Bear Stare!" It was hylrarious we cracked up for the rest of the night over it.

Alison - posted on 05/26/2009

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My hubby and I had a good laugh reading through all of these last night!



My almost 3 year old says "perty" instead of "pretty". This morning she said: "Mommy, you perty!" (she loves when I wear skirts). A few months ago, she was asking me about the mole on my face. I told her it was a "beauty mark". She then continued to call it and every freckle on my body a "perty mark". So adorable!

Sharon - posted on 05/24/2009

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I had just had my now 4 month old daughter. One night after his his bath the baby started screaming before I could get him dressed as I was scurring around looking for her one elusive pacifier, my now 2 and a half year old son son was also getting impatiant with me. Panties on! he kept telling me. After I had finaly settled my daughter down, I asked him what he wanted. He ran into his bedroom went into his laundry basket and pulled out a pair of pajamas, handed them to me and said PANTIES ON! I laughed so hard I thought I would need new panties on too. I wish Daddy was there.

Isabelle - posted on 04/17/2009

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My Brooklyn says many funny things she is the light of my day.... one time in the car she was trying to talk to her older sister this is what she said "Gabby...... Gabby..... GABBY, Hello Brooklyn is talking to you" with the biggest attitude in the world it was funny!! when her sister responded with Yes Brooklyn she goes "now was it that hard" HAHAHAH

Tracy - posted on 04/16/2009

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my little girl is 2 1/2 yrs old an one day after standing up after useing her potty shouted mummy, mummy quick i ran over thinking she'd hurt herself or something just for her to turn to say wow mum look i done a princess castle poo poo and then cry when i flushed it because she wanted to keep it to show her daddy.

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My 2 year old daughter and I were out shopping one day at a department store. As we were passing by the lingerie section, my daughter pointed in the direction of the bras and said with excitement, "Look Mommy! Boobs!" I couldn't help but laugh!!

Amy - posted on 04/15/2009

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While i was pregnant with my second child my daughter used to climb up on my lap and sit with me. as there became less and less room she became more unhappy about it. One day when i was almost nine months, she wanted to sit on my lap but there was almost no room. She looked at me with a sour face and told me to :"move back" (on the chair). I told her that mommy couldn't move back and that the lack of room was because of her sister. She pushed my stomach a little and said "move sissy!" the funniest part of the story is that the baby kicked back!! i thought "oh great, she's not even born yet and they're already fighting!" More recently, we ran out the night before Easter b/c i forgot tights for her. It was two minutes before closing and i was rushing, promising her if she was good, we'd stop and share a milk shake. She was perfect in the store. We found something acceptable (they did not have tights) and we walked to the register. The cashier (who looked miserable) asked Hanna if she wanted to hold the bag. Holding on to the edge of the counter and looking him dead in the eye, she said "No, I poopin". and she was grunting to boot! He didn't even bat an eyelash. he handed me my change and left. Even better....we couldn't leave until she was done.

Amy - posted on 04/15/2009

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Quoting Brandi:



My 3 year old was going potty while my husband was in the shower he finished and got out while she was still going.  Seeing him naked she said, "Daddy is that your tail?" referring to his well you know.  He said no it's my penis.  She replied, "Your peanut?"  I never laughed so hard, my husband didn't think it was quite as funny!






i have to laugh at that too! my daughter never really said anything about this particular part of his anatomy but she points and laughs. i die laughing everytime. He laughs too but i can see that he now avoids being uncovered in front of my daughter. she also caught him off guard one day. i will never forget it! She and i are working on not touching other people's stuff (she is always with me, which includes when i am changing so we naturally discuss parts) i guess she didn't take into account that this includes daddy's stuff as well. he was putting his contacts in and she wondered (silently) into the bathroom and poked him. I have never seen a man jump so high in my life. he didn't know whether to laugh for yell. my daughter was laughing so hard she fell over! (she loves to get scared) we still laugh about it to this day.

Tricia - posted on 03/25/2009

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I remember when i bought my 2nd daughter home, from the hospital, my eldest daughter was just over 2 and a half. I was holding the baby, and Harriot said, " you always hold that baby, put it down"



When i explained to her that Mummy had to hold her to feed her. She looked at me and so seriously said " Well I think its time for that baby to go back then"



On another occasion she was asked by a friend how she liked having a baby sister, to which she replied - "Not much all she does is cry!" :0)

Joni - posted on 03/20/2009

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On the way home from picking up the kids, my daughter anounced that she wanted a grill cheese sandwich for dinner. We decided to stop and pick up something at the drive thru. I told my husband to order Hannah(3) a grill cheese and get one for Kaleb (5) too. Hannah says "Kaleb not want a girl cheese samich mommy, he want a boy cheese samich" .  She'll never live that one down.

Joni - posted on 03/20/2009

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On the way home from picking up the kids, my daughter anounced that she wanted a grill cheese sandwich for dinner. We decided to stop and pick up something at the drive thru. I told my husband to order Hannah(3) a grill cheese and get one for Kaleb (5) too. Hannah says "Kaleb not want a girl cheese samich mommy, he want a boy cheese samich" .  She'll never live that one down.

Gabrielle - posted on 03/20/2009

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Last night my daughter kept yelling that my male pug was a "good girl". I told her that Loki is a boy, and she yelled, "No, Loki good GIRL!" Laughingly, I told her that she could yell all she wanted, but she wouldn't change reality. She hollered back, "I wanna change reality!" I giggled and told her to tell her daddy that. So she yelled down the hall, "Daddy, I wanna change reality!" (This is even funnier if you're a Mythbusters fan - after we stopped laughing, we got her to say, "I reject your reality and substitute my own".)

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My little brother (now 22) started crying in his car seat on a trip to the cottage.  It was a hot day and my Dad had just stopped to get us all a cold pop to drink.  My Mum and Dad very concerned asked him what happened, what was the matter?  To which he said Daddy, you're not supposed to drink and drive!!  It still makes me giggle after all these years...

Tina - posted on 03/19/2009

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My daughter who was 6 at the time came into the pet store with me. At the checkout in front of us was an elderly lady, my daughter in a pretty loud voice says to me "Mommy that lady is really crinkly! (meaning wrinkly). Quietly I try to tell her its not very nice to talk about people, to which she replies "It's ok mommy she's old and can't hear me anyways!" 

Stephanie - posted on 03/15/2009

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Just this past Saturday morning, my 2 year old son woke up and came into the living room asking for something to eat. I asked him, "what would you like for breakfast?", to which he replied (very seriously), "food".

Gabrielle - posted on 03/10/2009

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My husband took our then-2 yr old to the men's room with him when they were at a theme park one day. After she went potty, they went to wash her hands. It was a small restroom, with a urinal not 2 feet from the sink. A man came in and starting using the urinal while they were washing hands. My daughter looked over at the man and told him, "Good job, that boy!" The man smiled slightly but never looked over. My DH said he could have just died. My DD gets a "good job" after she uses the potty, so if she ever sees us do it, she tells us, "good job", too, very sweetly and earnestly. But this one took the cake,

Nancylee - posted on 03/07/2009

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when i was pregnant with my second child my daughter would come up to me and lift my shirt, look into my belly button and say "i see the baby mommy!" then she would proceed to put her sippy to by belly and say "the baby looked hungry so i am feeding it!"

Dawn - posted on 02/22/2009

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I have so many stories that I could share...I have an 8 year old and a 2 year old. Both boys. One day my oldest was telling the youngest not to do something because he was going to hurt himself...what was the little ones response? YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS! (using caps because he said it at the top of his litle lungs!) LOL! Out of the mouths of babes.....

Lindsay - posted on 02/18/2009

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My son has recently taken to patting my belly and saying, "More babies, please!"  When I finally asked him WHY he wants more babies, he said, "Raina's getting bigger now."  Our daughter will be 1 in April, and we had been talking about how it won't be long until she's not a baby anymore - so my son figures it's time to have another!

Kelsey - posted on 02/17/2009

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I had a huge project due and unfortunately for a week I spent more time at the kitchen table than my usual, playing with my 2-year old daughter.. About a week later, my husband and I were trying to make up for "lost" time with her and had found that there was a grand opening of a new "kid gym" in town. We presented the idea to our daughter by saying "Would you like to go to a jungle place to jump around meet some new kids". Without even looking up (she was playing with playdough) she said with such an honest tone "Could you be patient, please. I'm kinda busy right now".

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My grandpa was teasing my daughter, trying to get her to say that nana was bad.  So he said to her "Go tell Nana shes bad."



Without skipping a beat she pipes up with



"No poppa, you're bad. You want a time out?"



We all almost peed our pants laughing. Nana still uses it against him. LOL!

Bernadette - posted on 02/17/2009

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:)



My son hates meat, he rare to never eats it.  One day after lunch I was cleaning him up and was asking him why he wouldn't just eat his chicken and why he never eats meat.  "Try anything," I said..."A hot dog, a cheeseburger...just something other than strawberries and bananas."



He looked at me with the most serious face and said...



"I'm a fruit kinda guy, OKAY."



That's become his signature quote ;)  ...and was his first complete sentence.

JoEllen - posted on 02/15/2009

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Today at breakfast, my 3-year old son was eating apples and decided to joke around and told us he was eating bananas.  We laughed with him, then he made us belly laugh with his follow-up comment- "I crack myself up!"

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My almost 3 year old daughter told a random lady at a public restroom that she had a "stinky poop" that only "babies eat because it's nasty".

Rebecca - posted on 02/13/2009

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My daughter couldn't say bbq until just recently (she's 3), she used to call it "bugger you". If she wanted bbq sauce she would ask for bugger you sauce.So whenever we went to my brother's place and we were in the backyard, she would look at his bbq and say: "Uncle Warren bugger you!"

Michelle - posted on 02/13/2009

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I have a 16 yr old son and a 2 yr old daughter.   One day we were driving in the car and my daughter was being silly and laughing.   Her brother turned around and said, "you're nuts honey".   She looked right back at him and said, "bite my nuts".    I'd really love to know where she got that one from.   She's quite the character.

Michelle - posted on 02/13/2009

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I have a 16 yr old son and a 2 yr old daughter.   One day we were driving in the car and my daughter was being silly and laughing.   Her brother turned around and said, "you're nuts honey".   She looked right back at him and said, "bite my nuts".    I'd really love to know where she got that one from.   She's quite the character.

Michelle - posted on 02/13/2009

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I have a 16 yr old son and a 2 yr old daughter.   One day we were driving in the car and my daughter was being silly and laughing.   Her brother turned around and said, "you're nuts honey".   She looked right back at him and said, "bite my nuts".    I'd really love to know where she got that one from.   She's quite the character.

Petra - posted on 02/13/2009

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Haha, last one was great ! I guess my hubby wouldnt have liked the expression "peanut", lol.



 



My Sister went with us on a plane 3 weeks ago. She has never ever flown in her life before coz she was too afraid of it but we finally talked her around. While flying it was a bit rough due to turbulences. Suddenly after one of them my 2 1/2 year old son looks at us and says : Oh nooo, I fall down! You should have seen my sisters face for a second. But then we all loved and reasured my son we won't.

Brandi - posted on 02/12/2009

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My 3 year old was going potty while my husband was in the shower he finished and got out while she was still going.  Seeing him naked she said, "Daddy is that your tail?" referring to his well you know.  He said no it's my penis.  She replied, "Your peanut?"  I never laughed so hard, my husband didn't think it was quite as funny!

Chris - posted on 02/12/2009

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When I came home from the hospital after having my 2nd baby. My older son was sitting there watching me nurse the baby. He got up close and was inspecting what was going on. Then he says, "Mommy, why does he bite your boob? Can he bite my boob too?". Explain that one to a 2 year old.

Alesha - posted on 02/12/2009

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My 2 yr old loves to serve up imaginary food.  "Do you want some soup Mommy?"  "Sure,” I say. 



From that she has determined that if "Sure!"  means yes, then "I'm not sure." must mean no. 



I ask, "Are you ready for your bath?"  "I'm not sure," she replies.



 

Evelyn - posted on 02/11/2009

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My 2 year old son once said "I love boobs." I almost died laughing! We say "I love you" a lot in our family and he's certainly heard the word boob tossed around. I'm sure my hubbie was secretly proud. :) I tried to get him to say breast, but let's face it, boob is more fun to say.

Cherrie - posted on 02/11/2009

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My 7 year old daughter had asked a question one night while sitting at the kitchen table.  I answered the question and went on eating.  My 3 year old daughter turned to her sister and said:  "Duh you doofus.  I even knew that."  No idea where she got it.  My husband and I laughed so hard.

Rebecca - posted on 02/10/2009

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My Daughter got a supermarket set for xmas with plastic fruit & veg in it. One day when my mother in law was over, my daughter picked up a vegetable and said "look Granny, Aubergine!", Granny couldn't understand what she was saying and asked her to repeat it, so she said aubergine again, and again. By the third attempt, my daughter was getting frustrated. She rolled her eyes, looked at her Granny and said 'Eggplant!"

Shannan - posted on 02/09/2009

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i have one of my nephew when he was 3

(he's 6 now) i was looking after him and he was toilet trained at that stage too, i walked past him in the toilet which was nothing new as he could use it himself, i then came into the lounge after changing my daughter to find an odd smell.... after searching for the source i found under our rug his little spiderman undies wrapped up and inside a small poo... i then went to find carlos to see if he was ok... i asked if he needed help and his reply was ...'my poo is being naughty!' i cannot wait to use it at his 21st!

Amanda - posted on 02/09/2009

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My daughter just this morning was amazed because the sun was shining (we live in Western PA and the sun rarely shines this time of year...ha!).  She wanted to know what that "yellow fing" was and kept making me come to see it.  So funny. 



And Shannan...my daughter replaces n's with m's...so when she was in the tub with my 5 year old, she was coming at her with pinchy fingers saying, "I gonna pinch yous mipples!!"...so now they will be forever called "mipples" in my house!  Ha!

Shannan - posted on 02/09/2009

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i was making stir fry with my daughter who is nearly 3. she likes to help and after chopping up the zucchini she puts them in the bowl, i turn around and she is holding two round circles up over her little nipples and says 'mummy, look, nipples!' i still wet myself every time i cook with zucchini.

Kirsty - posted on 02/08/2009

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my partners friend was coming to visit a few nights ago and i said to my daughter go and get your pjs on coz alex is coming and she replied alex oooohhhh i could eat him , i was almost in tears laughing at her

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