Hello

Jennifer - posted on 03/05/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I am new to this site and Im so happy to have signed up. I was wondering if anyone had boys because my son was born February 7th 2006 and he just turned five. I only have one more child wom is nine and thats my daughter. My son is mamas boy big time but its obious he doesnt have the respect he should. He isnt so much a problem child because he does well with dicsipline and in school but hes VERY persistent and adement about what he wants till he gets it. I am so easy on him because he had so many health problems his whole first year of his life. Hes healthy now and I know if I keep this up I will be dealing with a troubled teenage boy. Im young and not used to a boy so i was wondering if anyone had any advice for me about what first steps I can take to get the respect I know he can give to me... hes such a loving little boy and it hurts to see him cry.... thats another thing, he has a older sister and two other older sisters which are my step daughters, i feel so sad that he gets left out alot. How do I get over the guit (I dont know why) and the attachment of emotions and as a parent to him???

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Lisa - posted on 03/08/2011

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I have two little ones, a freshly turned 5 yr old son & soon-to-be 3 yr old daughter. I understand your frustrations with your son not listening. My son is fantastic in every way. He is very strong-willed though & sometimes can be a challenge. Even though you tell him no, he still persists & his listening skills need improvement. There are a few things that I find to be good techniques. As someone previously mentioned, the time out works great. When he is doing something naughty, you give him a warning (if you don't stop xx, you'll be getting a time out). Then follow through if the bad behaviour continues. At his age, I also find explaining your reasoning is very helpful. For ie: son, I'd like to stop xxx because it may cause harm to your sister. I also find taking away privileges to be a good motivator for good behaviour. My son likes the computer & particular comp games. If he misbehaves, he risks getting them taken away. Warnings are not given for hitting, he hits, he goes for a time out. The key is consistency always & follow through. If you waiver, they get mixed messages & seek to push limits. If they know where you stand, then they know what is acceptable & will not be tolerated. Always acknowledge good behaviour (I love it when you help your sister or I'm so proud of you for doing xx). In the end, we all just want to have happy, well adjusted children. You are doing yourself a favour & your son by disciplining him & encouraging him to the best little guy he can be. If possible, maybe spend some one-on-one time with him. That works wonders!

Good Luck!!

Sharon - posted on 03/07/2011

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i have 3 kids my oldest daughter is 13 then i have a 6 year old and then my 5 year old he is just 9 days younger than your little boy ,and he too was sick for his first year but fine and healty now and he too is a mammys boy .he is very loving and always tellig me how much he loves me but then he to just has these little bursts ,if he doesnt want to do something he wont but i put him on the naughty step ,and i have to say it works if he does something i just tell him to stop and explain that if he does it again he will be placed on the step ,if he does it again he gets to sit on the step for 5 mins but as i place him on the step i tell him why he is been put there and just walk away,if he gets i i just place him back on it again , and again but not saying a word to him when doing this ,after he has sat on the step ,i ask him why was he put on the step ,i wait till he tells me and then he has to say sorry and we always hug afterwards ,i rarely have to place him on the step now because after i tell him that if he dosnt behave i will place him on the step he just stops and behaves the way he should . he still kind of have me wrapped around his little finger when he just looks up at me with his cute little face ,but i know i have to follow through with my actions ,my 6 year old get the very same .Good luck but i know excatly how u feel the attachment is so hard but its wort it when u follow through and he wont love u any less :)

Jennifer - posted on 03/06/2011

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My 5 year old daughter is the same!!!! She doesn't listen, Screams when she doesn't get what she wants, & throws things around all the time. I too am easy on her because her father isn't around. Her teacher at school told me to start a reward chart for her with the things I want her to do on it and reward her for doing them. she started out only having to earn 3 stickers for each task to get a reward, then each time she completes the chart she gets a big reward, & it starts again, only she has to get 4 stickers for each task, and you add one everytime they finish. It seems to be starting to work so I would suggest trying that. & also we give her money for her reward to encourage her to save.

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