my four year old is still wetting himself!

Shara - posted on 11/13/2010

My 4 1/2yr old still ocassionally wets her bed at night and I used to be very worried that something was wrong with her etc. I looked into the science of being able to hold "it" over night and it is related to a hormone that causes the kidneys to produce less urine overnight and also the bladder sphinter getting stronger as they get older. The hormone production is apparently genetically based and as long as they are dry at night by te age of 8 (omg how many wet beds is that) then doctors don't feel it is a problem. It is advised not to get them up in the middle of the night to pee because then the bladder sphinter doesn't get stronger. Also putting them back in nappies is ok but be aware that the wee often happens in the morning and it may encourage them to not be dry because they can be lazy and just wee in the nappy instead. I don't punish her for wet beds and I change it when she isn't around so there is no attention reward for it but if there is a dry bed and nappy (if she wanted to wear one) then there is a huge celebration and we use a sticker chart. I probably get 1 wet bed maybe once a month or less now. I remember the big reward I got when I stopped wetting the bed - a big bird alarm clock so I must have been around 4 or 5 when I stopped otherwise I wouldn't have remembered and as I said it is apparently genetic for the night time stuff. I don't have problems during the day but what about the slimline night time nappy pants that are similar to undies. I remember a girl at school that had accidents and she used to get picked on because of it or maybe the picking on started the accidents and it became circular from there. Maybe if you can hide his problem with nappy pants or something until he can manage it better and so it isn't a big deal that might help solve the problem.
Good luck to you both

Sharon - posted on 10/20/2010

same as u my son wets at night time they say we may wait till they grow out of it help!! i wonder is your child been aloud to use the toilet in school when he asks to go caused this happen to my other son when he started school he is now 6 he wet himself twice i asked him how or why and he said he just didnt make it he had asked to use the toilet and his teacher told him him he could go in a min but we all know that when a child says the have to go they have to go so i had a word with his teacher and asked her that when my son asks to use the toilet he needs to go straight away i never had any problems after that my 6 year old also wets the bed i also have a daughter and she was trained in 2 weeks day and night i often wondered was it a boy thing

Jessica - posted on 10/17/2010

well i actually am at the same place you are. i have an almost 4 yr old daughter and she would go months and months without any accidents. even at night. but lately she isnt wanting to get up in the morning to go pee. its never through the night that she pees herself. always the morning before i have a chance to wake her up to go. i think it has something to do with her little brother getting alot of attention lately. hes about ten months and is gonna be walking soon so i have been trying to encourage him and pay attention to her at the same time (not an easy task). again this is just assuming this is why. but she has done this in the past and what i have always done is get her pull ups and tell her she has to wear diapers again because mommy cant wash her blanket everyday. usually by the third night of wearing it she tells me she doesnt want to be a baby again and that she will try really hard not to pee herself. so basically sometimes you have to take a step back for a minute with them for them to realize they dont want to be like that again. most 4 yr olds will decide they dont want to wear diapers lol. well not sure if this helps but it works for me :)