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Potty training issues

Kim - posted on 05/20/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

Ok, this is probably a strange one but my almost 3 year old is completely potty trained at preschool but NOT at home. At school, they remind her to go potty and she does with no fuss and no accidents. I try the same thing at home and she just refuses (or denies that she needs to go) and then pees and poops in her underwear or on the floor.

I thought that maybe I was being too "intense" at home and that is why she is resisting but I am being very low key about it but still having same problems. I asked the preschool exactly what they do and have recreated that at home but didn't help.

Any suggestions?

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Jennifer - posted on 05/20/2009

622

My son is resistant to being told what to do too and so in training I found two things that worked. The first we still use to help him stay accident free. We set times that he MUSt go potty, it's just the "rule". We still hold to "It's the rule to go before we get in the car to go, anywhere!", "It's the rule to go before we sit down for a meal.", and "It's the rule to go right after we wake up." (From nap or in the morning, even though he still wears a pullup for sleeping) The other thing that worked well during train was I set a timer and when the time went off he had to sit on the potty and try. We always just sain "The timer says it's time." and that worked with him. It was ok for teh timer to tell him to go, just not Mom or Dad. ;-) We also made a big deal over the accoplishments, had a reward system, and read various books about going potty. And we also made him responsible for cleanup (to the best of his ability) of accidents. We didn't shame him or make a big deal, but did emphasize the differance in time it took to go quickly to the potty vs having to clean up a mess and change clothes. Often times we would arrange a situation so that what ever fun thing he had been doing, well now there wasn't anymore time to do that!

Just keep in mind that id she can and is doing it at school, she has the ability to do it at home, so persevere!

Alison - posted on 05/20/2009

2,753

This was me a few months ago. As long as she has to be told to go, she is not officially potty trained. Most likely, it will sort itself out with time. When is she turning 3?

For Eloise, she was very resistant to doing #2 in the toilet. When she finally did it, I made a huge deal out of it. I took a picture of her and her caca (with a HUGE smile). We always called someone (usually one of the grandmas) when she did her first peepees and first cacas in the toilet.

One thing I tried and it may have helped is this. I decided that her peepee was her responsibility. So when she wet herself, I tried to make her take off her pants herself and put them in the laundry. And also clean up the puddle if there was one.

Don't get discouraged, every kid figures it out sooner or later!