My 7 year old son is such a worrier

Lola - posted on 04/21/2013

OMG!! You have just described my son.. He chewed the skin off of his ring finger when he started a new school. Kindergarden, he was so nervous, that the school called some crisis intervention team, which put him in a mental hospital on a 51/50 hold for 12 hours... It was horrible. I had requested an IEP for him at school because it just wasnt working. he was in the office everyday for aprox. 4 months. they later found out he has an anxiety disorder, adhd, major depression disorder (Thanks school) he cant stay seated, he is suirming, started stuttering. he is now going to a psychologist just to talk about his feelings, He is now in an amazing new school. His I.Q is 140, and all he wanted was someone to litsen to him in school... get help before it gets bad..

Kathleen - posted on 08/31/2011

Please, please, please check out PANDAS. It could be underlying strep that is causing your children to suffer. Go to an internist or pediatrician, NOT a psychologist. ADHD is a MISDIAGNOSIS for these kids, and the medications will never help. Tics, ADHD, anxiety are all classic PANDAS symptoms. Here is a list of doctors who know about this:
http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=23...

Kathleen - posted on 08/31/2011

Here is a list of PANDAS doctors. It is hard to find doctors who understand this, but your son can be helped!
http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=23...

Kathleen - posted on 08/31/2011

Dear Tina,
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE check for strep. You need to start with blood tests that measure the strep antibodies in your son's system. They are called titer tests. You can start with ASO and Anti D-Nase tests. Your son's symptoms are typical of a condition called PANDAS. Many boys aged 7 come down with this. The medical community is behind the 8 ball. Way behind. Here is a webite for you to start:
http://www.enzymestory.com/PANDAS.html

also try savingsammy.net for a link to a list of PANDAS doctors who know how to find it if it is there. Good luck! Kathleen

Kathleen - posted on 08/07/2011

Dear Tina,
I think I just sent this to you, but just in case I did not, here is an idea that might help your son.



The absolute FIRST THING I would do is to have your child thoroughly checked for strep, using a blood test. There is a condition out there that most people in the medical community are unaware (or in denial) of called PANDAS. That stands for pediatric autoimmune neurological disorder associated with strep. I really really hope you will heed this message, because it could be an explanation and it could prevent you from giving your child medications that will simply mask the problems, but not solve the root of them, which may be due to STREP A. My oldest son (who is currently 9) had this condition, and he is completely cured now due to antibiotics. It sounds weird, but just like with Rheumatic Fever, one's antibodies go nuts, but with PANDAS instead of attacking the joints and heart valve, for some reason the antibodies go up to the basil ganglia and affect learning or behavior. More boys than girls have this reaction, and every kid has different symptoms, which can look like some or all of the following: tics, anger issues or emotional instability, anxiety, depression, ADHD, OCD, ODD, fine motor problems leading to sloppy handwriting, problems with math...that is all I can think of right now. The key question is: HAS YOUR CHILD ALWAYS been this way, since birth, or did it start at a particular time (like when he or she was exposed to strep, probably unbeknownst to anyone)? My son had had chronic strep with NO SYMPTOMS, and when we had his tonsils removed, all of the strep was hidden deep inside, where antibiotics cannot reach. Check out the website saving sammy.net. Best of luck on your journey. Here is a list of doctors who treat PANDAS: http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=23... I will pray for you and your child, and I hope you get this message. I am sorry for your suffering, when it feels like you are "losing" your child, but there is hope out there. Our son also had suicidal thoughts, and we had no idea where they had come from. This is also common with PANDAS. (A child may feel that way because he or she cannot control their bad behavior.) All of our son's behavior issues are completely gone now, with his antibiotic treatment. Check out a PANDAS doctor and maybe they can help! The few specialists who are really into this say that they are certain that there are many many kids out there who have been misdiagnosed as having ADHD and other conditions, but that they are really PANDAS kids. Your case sounds classic. Try to find a specialist. Check out the book Saving Sammy.
Sincerely, Mommo

Kathleen - posted on 08/07/2011

The absolute FIRST THING I would do is to have your child thoroughly checked for strep, using a blood test. There is a condition out there that most people in the medical community are unaware (or in denial) of called PANDAS. That stands for pediatric autoimmune neurological disorder associated with strep. I really really hope you will heed this message, because it could be an explanation and it could prevent you from giving your child medications that will simply mask the problems, but not solve the root of them, which may be due to STREP A. My oldest son (who is currently 9) had this condition, and he is completely cured now due to antibiotics. It sounds weird, but just like with Rheumatic Fever, one's antibodies go nuts, but with PANDAS instead of attacking the joints and heart valve, for some reason the antibodies go up to the basil ganglia and affect learning or behavior. More boys than girls have this reaction, and every kid has different symptoms, which can look like some or all of the following: tics, anger issues or emotional instability, anxiety, depression, ADHD, OCD, ODD, fine motor problems leading to sloppy handwriting, problems with math, stuttering...that is all I can think of right now. The key question is: HAS YOUR CHILD ALWAYS been this way, since birth, or did it start at a particular time (like when he or she was exposed to strep, probably unbeknownst to anyone)? My son had had chronic strep with NO SYMPTOMS, and when we had his tonsils removed, all of the strep was hidden deep inside, where antibiotics cannot reach. Check out the website saving sammy.net. Best of luck on your journey. Here is a list of doctors who treat PANDAS: http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=23... I will pray for you and your child, and I hope you get this message. I am sorry for your suffering, when it feels like you are "losing" your child, but there is hope out there. Our son also had suicidal thoughts, and we had no idea where they had come from. This is also common with PANDAS. (A child may feel that way because he or she cannot control their bad behavior.) All of our son's behavior issues are completely gone now, with his antibiotic treatment. Check out a PANDAS doctor and maybe they can help! The few specialists who are really into this say that they are certain that there are many many kids out there who have been misdiagnosed as having ADHD and other conditions, but that they are really PANDAS kids. Your case sounds classic. Try to find a specialist. Check out the book Saving Sammy.
Sincerely, Mommo

Melissa - posted on 02/06/2010

I have a 7-year-old that was diagnosed at age 5 with anxieties. She cried a lot, chewed on her shirts, was noticeably stressed during certain situations. She started with working with the guidance counselor for one-on-one help which boosted her self-esteem. I received some great tips for home and the classroom. I'm also a special ed. teacher and would love to give you added suggestions. Feel free to message me or e-mail at kidsfirst6@yahoo.com. Take care!

Robin - posted on 01/16/2010

My son stammers and fidgets a lot. He stammers he is extremely intelligent and he stammers when his brain is going faster than his mouth can get it out. The fidgeting for him is a nervous habit, but it is definitely not the only sign of anxiety. His whole attitude shows anxiety. He is only 5 and for now he just sees the school councilor and she says she will let me know if he needs further treatment.

Courtney - posted on 07/23/2009

my son thinks that he needs to worry about and take care of me instead of the other way around.

Michelle - posted on 04/10/2009

Bonnie--I know what you mean.  I wish Bri could find friends that don't bully her and recognize the ones that really are friends.  Always a drama scene with her.  Now she has developed tics on her ADHD med and her anxiety has not gotten better.  I feel like I have to keep figuring out what direction to go with her treatment all the time.  It is so fustrating.  Her psychologists is even thinking that an anxiety med is the direction to go.  So here we go do we medicate her of not.

Bonnie - posted on 03/28/2009

I just want my daughter to enjoy life and have friends.

Brandy - posted on 02/09/2009

The meds sound amazing... Even today, with the snow almost melting in Michigan, we tried riding bikes - he tried it about 4 times, got more and more frustrated, and ended up throwing his bike down and making fun of his brother's "baby bike" (training wheels) - while stomping, making fists and acting like he was going to pull his hair out... I'm at a loss, and thinking medication may be our best bet - therapists don't ever see this side of him, and it drives me crazy!

Lara - posted on 02/09/2009

We started out with our normal pediatricion.  We had to do a survey, teacher had to do a survey and then we met for a doctor evaluation.  That was when we first started him on the ADHD medicine (Straterra).   However on the survey he also scored high on the anxiety piece so we continued to watch that.  Then we went back to the doctor and discussed the general axiety piece and she started him on the Paxil and recommended that we go to a counselor.  There is a book that I will send you the name of that talks about all of these different things (ADHD, OCD, ANxiety) ext in kids.  It was a great over view on all of the symptoms and helped me sort of diagnose him first.  I also have another book that I will give the name of that talks about doing medicine in children.  It was helpful as well.  When I get home this evening I will send the names of the books!  I would highly recommed it.  I think that we as parents have to be the biggest advocates.   Anyway since then we have gone to a specialist (councelor) that evaluated him as well and agreeded with us that he does have general anxiety and is comfortable with the meds he is on.  She at this point doesn't believe he is ADHD (focus part) too, but we are watching that part.   Good luck and I will send the books.  Follow your gut.  Although meds are scary I can't believe how much happier and calmer he is!! It is so neat to see. 

Good luck,

Lara

Tina - posted on 02/08/2009

That sounds fantastic Lara !  I would love my son to be a bit more out going also. He Wont try anything new an d gets all tearfull about it, once i have pushed him to try something he loves it. How did you get him diagnosed ?? I have been to our GP now who has referred us to a support group who will come and do a home visit, if they feel he needs any further help they will inform the GP.  I know medication isnt ideal but if it gives them the chance to enjoy life and grow up normal its worth it i think. Idread to think of Bullying and other issues he would have to face once he is older.

Thanks

Tina

Lara - posted on 02/08/2009

I have a 7 1/2 year old son that has always been very nervous about things.  He too has many nervous habits such as bitting his nails, chewing on his shirt, and he too fidgets a lot.  Anytime he would do something new he would worry and avoid it.  He is much like I was at the same age.  About a year ago we started him on Strattera thinking he was ADHD without the hyper piece.  He was having a lot of trouble focusing.  Strattera did help him in school but made the anxious part more obvious to us.  After several months of reading and looking into what may be the cause we ended up changing him from Strattera to Paxil for general anxiety.    Ever since he started taking paxil it has been night and day difference.  It's like he gets to enjoy things now without constantly worrying.  He can go with the flow and enjoy life so much more now.  He has started to be more outgoing and make friends or ask questions when needed.  I can't explain how much this has helped him.   It was a huge decision to put him on it but I felt like if we can safely give him something that will help him feel more comfortable "in his skin" and enjoy things I needed to try it.    So for right now he is doing great and isn't anxious hardly at all.  He does continue to have some focus issues but it too has improved.  He can focus so much more now since he isn't worried about everything.  Good luck and if you have additional quesitons please let me know.

Thanks,

Lara

Michelle - posted on 01/31/2009

You are welcome.

We just had her IEP meeting--Can't believe they said she doesn't qualify under the other section where ADHD and anxiety would go.  She has 3 diagnosed issues! Our psychologist is going to see what she can do to change that. It is so amazing to me that they recommended that we continue to do the therapy we are doing which is weekly OT & psychologist but say she doesn't qualify.  What a disconnect with reality!

Brandy I know what you mean with the medication.  It is scary putting your child on mind altering medication.  So far we have done only ADHD medication and are holding off with anxiety meds. I'm hopeful that the therapy will work.  Time will tell. 

Brandy - posted on 01/30/2009

Awesome, thanks so much. He just goes back and forth from obnoxiously, hyper happy to pissed - flat out violently pissed - so easily. I've wondered about meds, but have been so afraid to try anything ... and of course at the therapist or doctors, he's just the sweetest, loveliest little boy. It's like I want to remind him "This is the one place to NOT be on your best behavior!!!" But I'll look for the books. At this point, especially between insurances (the necessary evil!), anything should help!!

Michelle - posted on 01/29/2009

Hi Brandy--Yes a child can be manic.  My daughter was that way on one of her first medications.  I have also read some on bipolar since that was what her psychologist originally thought she was bipolar. She would tantrum for a whole hour without me or anyone being able to reach her.  There is a book our psychologist has that you can get from Amazon that has a check list.  I also have seen one that has what a person with bipolar lookes like as they grow and develop.  That was interesting reading.  She also recommended we read "the Explosive Child" by Greene.  I have just started reading that one.  The "Transforming the Difficult Child; The Nurtured Heart Approach" by Glasser has some pretty good parenting strategis for dealing with explosive kids.

Michelle - posted on 01/29/2009

Hi Tina-I hope she can be carefree but I have serious doubts on that.  We are already on high alert for eating disorders since she has a very bad body image of herself already at age 7.  She thinks she is fat and worries about it! She is barely 54 pounds(which is up from 50 pounds in July) and in 7 slims that have the elastic-button system so I can tighten them up so they don't fall off her little butt! The stuff that pops in her head is amazing and scary.

I went through all that guilt and blame too.  Most of ADHD is genetic and anxiety is also from the little I have researched.  That part is confusing since Rob and I both don't have history of mental health. I kept thinking it was my fault because I didn't realize I was pregnant with her until I was about 17 weeks.  At one point we were told it would be highly unlikely that we would be able to get pregnant.  She has been and still is the biggest surprise of our lives. So I kept thinking that if I would have known I wouldn't have had those couple drinks during that time or taken my prenatal vitamins sooner. All that has nothing to do with it.  Drinking causes FAS and she doesn't have that. It takes time to come to terms with all that stuff. When I watched the Randy Pausch interview with his wife and read his book--it gave me new perspective--"Is this helpful?" The "this" is beating yourself up over something that is already done and can't be changed. So I have done my best to put the pitty parties behind me and focused my energy into surrounding Bri with all the professional help we can. One nice thing is we can share our stories to help each other figure out the next step.  I wish I had that in the very beginning of all this.  Am I over reacting and all the questions you ask yourself--I have found that going with my gut on this journey has been that thing to do.

Tina - posted on 01/28/2009

Thanks Michelle and Brandy.

Thats the thing you cant help but think what have i done wrong ?? It really is good to know that we are not the only people with children suffering like this. My son has an appointment with the Doctor for weds so i will see what they have to say about it. Really hopw this can be sorted so he can grow into a carefree teenager !

Michelle - posted on 01/28/2009

Hi Tina-I also have a 7 year old daughter that was diagnosed this fall with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. She picks her fingers, has been known to pick at scabs on her arms that took 4 months to heal because she would not leave them alone, pops her joints, sniffs when there isn’t anything to sniff, fidgets among other things. She is also very sensitive and a perfectionist. She doesn’t have any speech or hearing issues. We are doing weekly cognitive behavioral therapy with a psychologist for her GAD. It has been hard to make progress since she also has ADHD-combined type. I’ve read and have been told that this doubling up of diagnoses is very common—something like 30 to 50% of kids with ADHD will have an additional mental health diagnosis. I think our pediatrician would like us to put her on anxiety medication but we are having a hard time with the thought of her being on one more brain altering medication. Those black box warnings concern me plus the long term affects are not well studied. We are also taking her to weekly occupational therapy visits to help with her ADHD and Sensory Processing Disorder. She hates to have her hair brushed and loud noises bug her also. She also has trouble settling down at night so she gets melatonin to help her with that. It has been a struggle trying to keep up with the hectic therapy schedule along with activity schedules for our other 2 girls---UGH!!! Anyway it will all be worth it in the end if we can help her feel better and learn coping skills to manage her anxiety. I know of some books and websites if you interested. It is nice to have someone to talk to that knows it isn’t bad parenting or family environment that is going on but that your child truly has a medical issue.

Brandy - posted on 01/28/2009

I also have one! I have an 8 year old who is not only worried about everything from spelling tests to daddy in the army but is also very ANGRY - all the time. And completely down on himself. It's heartbreaking to have a child who is genuinely not happy. At the age of 8! He's been in and out of therapy with private counselors - mostly at his discretion. Now with our new military insurance, I'm working on what to do to get him back in to some kind of therapeutic setting, just to have someone to vent to almost. He needs to learn to deal with his anger and anxiety in constructive ways.

I've also wondered about ADD. He's by no means hyper, and does very well in school, but there are times that it just seems like he isn't there. Is it possible for an 8 year old to be manic?

Tina - posted on 01/26/2009

Thanks Kaitlin, Its just such a worry just wish i could make it better and take all his worry away. Hopefully the counselling will help your little one. I am seeing my doctor Weds to see if i can get him assesed. x

Kaitlin - posted on 01/25/2009

Hi Tina,

My 6 year old is also very anxiety ridden. She was just diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder by a psychologist and is now getting private counseling from a clinical social worker as well as weekly sessions from her school guidance counselor. I am hoping that this will help her. She just worries about things that an average 6 year old shouldn't worry about. It's heart breaking!! I also have some mild concerns about ADHD, inattentive (not hyperactive). It's hard to weed out if she has an attention problem or if her anxiety is causing her inattentiveness.....Anyway, you're not alone!!

Caroline - posted on 01/23/2009

I know Tina, its great having someone to talk to. Just don't let anyone fob you off, you know your son..make sure you get answers to any questions that u have, however hard it is..we've been fobbed off for the past god knows how many years.. if you think u r right keep going..xx

Tina - posted on 01/23/2009

At least you may get some help if he is diagnosed, Schools should really pick up on these sorts of things really, i had wondered wether my son has the Hyperactive strain of ADHD which i will also talk to school nurse or GP about. It is nice that we can talk to some else who is facing similar problems.

Take care

Caroline - posted on 01/23/2009

Lukes younger brother is also the complete opposite, very sweet natured & level headed. We had an appointment this afternoon for a speech therapy review..Luke would not co-operate kept getting upset & withdrawn sinking further into his coat. Eventually the therapist asked him one question too many & he stormed out the room & wouldn't return. I spoke to the therapist for a further 40 mins, giving her details of our anxieties & based on that & what she had seen during the session she is refering him to the paediatrition to be assessed for autistic spectrum syndrome as he shows so many trates & has done for some years. He was tested about 4 yrs ago but the educational psycologist said that he was only borderline on various different tests for those sorts of things.... Its so frustrating, had he have taken borderline as being serious enough we would be in a very different position now...Sorry to ramble on, its just great to know that we are not on our own

Tina - posted on 01/23/2009

Thanks for that Caroline in a way its a relief to know my son is not the only one like that.  I really worry about his future also as he is quitre soft natured and i worry he will get bullied once he gets to secondary school. We had Nhs speech therapy and also paid private £50 for 45 mins but neither seemed to help. His stammer has got better and then worse and i fiund it gets worse when he is worried or excited about something. I just feel he has far too many worries for a 7 year old boy and really wish i could make everything better for him. My youngest is the complete opposite he is so outgoing and care free so i know its nothing to do with the way he has been brought up. I think its his nature. I am going to speak to his school nurse to find out wether there is some sort of counselling that may help .

Caroline - posted on 01/22/2009

Hello Tina, My eldest son Luke has had problems with his speech since he learnt talk, he had grommits fitted in both ears when he was 4 because they found out that his hearing was quite bad. We have been through private speech therapy (at £1 a minute it wasn't cheap but u do what u gotta do, cos at that time we were on the nhs waiting list for speech therapy) and NHS speech therapy. He has been to group sessions that absolutely freaked him out, we think because it burst his bubble that he felt secure in.

He also fidgets about & picks the skin off nearly all his fingers making them look quite sore.

Luke is quite an emotional young lad (too much like me really 4 my liking) and I do often worry about what the future will hold for him...as he's not a great mixer and acts very inmature (he is 13 in june)

Sorry not to be any help with answering your question, I just had to reply to you

Keep safe & take care

xx