As a christian mom, how do you feel about birth control?

Heather - posted on 03/24/2010

I want to thank everyone who contributed to this conversation, but as it is shifting to a discussion on abortion (which is still suspended) I am locking this conversation.

Diane - posted on 03/24/2010

Where does free will and sin come into this?

Did God want me to have an abortion, to solve my problem? Did He lead me to it because I was young and couldn't handle a child? Or am I responsible?

We can not blame or put the responsibility for our actions on God. We have to make informed decisions. At the time of my abortion I did not think it was what it was........an already conceived child. Planned Parenthood did not inform me about fetal development. Life starts at conception not when the child takes its first breath at birth. That is a scientific fact. But I can't blame them anymore than attribute the abortion to Gods as His plan for my life.

We need to look at what science says about life. Now when I was in my mothers womb, she drank and smoked. Back then they did not think either would harm the baby, but we all know today that it does. Women even took drugs that eventually made their children deformed. Who was at fault, God?

All I am saying here is that things are not always as they seem.

The facts are that there is a link between some birth control and abortion.

I believe God would want us to take that information into consideration. Scientists are now working on the link between birth control and breast cancer.

I just had two breast biopsies....at one time l took the pill. Does that mean if I got breast cancer that God led me to have it?

I believe God is the master planner and that he allows us free will to make our own mistakes. Not that He cant stop something, He chooses not to. I came to love Him, it was my choice. And when I sin, its my choice and I will have to suffer the consequences for MY actions.

This is a good website with good information. Look at the links and the latest information about the harmful effects of some birth control.

http://www.physiciansforlife.org/content...

"A study by the World Health Organization (WHO), published online (27Mar02) in the prestigious British medical journal, The Lancet, found that women who use the oral contraceptive pill for more than five years could triple their risk of developing cervical cancer."

"An analysis in 1990 of the research up to that time indicated that women who used the Pill for 4 or more years before their first full-term pregnancy had a 72% increased risk of developing breast cancer."

"Nearly half of women using depot medroxyprogesterone acetate (DMPA), commonly known as the birth control shot, will experience high bone mineral density (BMD) loss in the hip or lower spine within two years of beginning the contraceptive [University of Texas Medical Branch at Galveston]. More than two million American women use the birth control shot, including approximately 400,000 teens..."

Birth control not only can take an already conceived life it can also be harmful to women in many other ways.

God Bless

Brittney - posted on 03/23/2010

I truthfully dont believe there is anything wrong with birth control. If God wants you to have a baby then he will make it happen, birth control or not. My daughter was concieved while I was on birth control and using condoms. At the time we were not finacially stable and were living in a horrible neighborhood. One that I wouldnt have wanted to bring my daughter up in, but God must have thought we were ready for the task of parenting. Because now I have a beautiful 4 month old daughter. We no longer live in the bad neighborhood and we are finacially stable.



If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.



Happy moments, praise God.

Difficult moments, seek God.

Quiet moments, worship God.

Painful moments, trust God.

Every moment, thank God.

Becky - posted on 03/23/2010

My salvation and the Lord's grace has nothing to do with birth control. Not practicing BC [can] be foolish and irresponsible if parents cannot provide enough time for their children, not to mention the expense. Welfare can bear this out in some cases.

Diane - posted on 03/22/2010

I believe that God allows us free will to make our own decisions. Of course He knows what we will do, but He steps back and gives us freedom. I do not believe we are robots.
I had an abortion twenty nine years ago. It was my action that took my child's life God did not lead me there. I made an uninformed choice I should have known better. I ignored the facts and at that time there was not the scientific evidence that there is today about the life in the womb. God did not want my child to die, He did not lead me there........I did it. I was raised in a Godly Christian home. But I was a Christian who backslid, who was not walking with God and I suffered consequences for years because that abortion almost destroyed my life. I suffered with depression and thought about suicide. It drove a wedge between my husband and my marriage until I accepted Christ and fell at His feet and asked for forgiveness. How unworthy I still am…..
Sinners have an obscene propensity for lying to themselves and Satan uses this to his advantage. I ran from the scriptures and evidence because I did not want to believe that my actions were sinful. In many ways I looked at myself through rose colored glasses because I could not cope. However when I did investigate what medical science had to say, when I searched the scriptures to see how God values life, this information finally changed me. He changed my whole life.
Today information is there to make an informed choice. Do not rely on opinion or what you think should be right it’s what God thinks is acceptable. God values ALL LIFE. He knew us before we were in the womb. God expects us to be discerning people who can weed between different options to decide what is right and what is wrong. We can not alter the bible to fit our opinion or culture because if we want a tolerant gospel we will not find it in the Words of Christ. He is specific about what is sin.
I believe when in doubt, do not do it.
About how many children God wants us to have...........I am sure He wanted me to have the one I aborted, but I took that option off the table.
There are a lot of different options for birth control today. Do not eliminate abortion in the list. The Guttmaucher Institute finds that, the majority of women who get abortions today will get multiple abortions. It can and is used as birth control and the sad thing is, many Christian women think it is not a sin.
I pray that I have not offended anyone here, I share this because it is part of my testimony. Today I volunteer with Right to Life, so often times I am on the front lines of the fight for the unborn. I have heard every excuse in the book and each time I look at some hurting person struggling with this issue they remind me of myself before I was saved. We love to hear judgement when it’s directed at others especially if someone opposes us. But when the judgement speaks directly to us, we don't want anything to do with it.
It is not my intention to speak with an air of superiority, I just want to get the facts out so that the information might help someone make a righteous decision.

We are all different......but should remember that we all worship the same Father in Heaven and the rules are the same for all of us. God did not mean that we should walk alone, he gave us Christian brothers and sisters. I value all here who share my love for Christ.
God Bless

Victoria - posted on 03/22/2010

Once again I have to say that it's a personal choice and obviously not right for some. I believe that if it is something God has lead you to use, then He is also going to make sure that it works in the sense of prevention, prior to, NOT after the fact.

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I hear from God (right down to conversation others have had in my absence) and I know that I am right where God wants to be in all areas of my life, that includes the use of hormonal birth control (The Evra Patch).

If you are confident in the way God is leading you, then I don't think you any any concerns, if you are just doing or not doing something because of what someone else says, then you need to check in with God.

Scripture tells us in Mt 4:7 Jesus answered him, "It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’"

If God is leading us in the direction of using birth control and we think that, O well He won't give me more kids then I can handle, then we are putting the Lord to the test, however if He said don't use it and "my grace is sufficent for you" then we are also putting the Lord to test by using it.

We need to start hearing more clearly what God is saying for our individual situations. There is no mould that is one size fits all christians. God moves sometimes one way and sometimes another way.

A true story: God told a gentleman to seed plant his house to another family, after much searching to check he was hearing right the main did so. After a time, God blessed the man, by giving him a successful hotel. Well the man shared his testimony, about hearing from God and doing whatever it is God tells you. Another man heard the testimony and took from it that if I give my house away to someone in need then God will give me a hotel, so this man gave his house away, however that wasn't Gods plan for that mans life and that man ended up living in a hotel rather than owning one.

I say that to say this, just because not using birth control works for some and they only have say 3 kids, doesn't mean it's gonna work for everyone. God gave us wisdom, and He gave us resources, and He speaks to each of us as individuals with He leading for ours lives.

Diane - posted on 03/21/2010

I have done a lot of research on this topic that I would like to share.
I am not trying to start a discussion or debate about abortion, but as a Christian we need to look at birth control and methods to see if they are Godly.



Some people don't want to make a connection between birth control and abortion, they see them as two different acts. But are they? The fact is however that many consider them abortifacients because they work by causing early term abortions.

The Physicians Desk Reference is the most frequently used reference book by physicians in America. It lists and explains the effects, benefits and risks of every medical product that can legally be prescribed. The Food and Drug Administration requires that each manufacturer provide accurate information on its products, based on scientific research and laboratory tests. This information is included in the PDR. Keep in mind while reading it that the term implantation, by definition always involves an already conceived human being. Therefore any agent which serves to prevent implantation functions as an abortifacient. This is the PDR's product information for ortho-Cept, as listed by Ortho, one of the largest manufacturers of the pill.

"Combination oral contraceptives act by suppression of gonadotropins. Although the primary mechanism of this action is inhibition of ovulation, other alterations include changes in the cervical mucus, which increases the difficulty of the sperm entry into the uterus, and changes in the endometrial which reduce the likelihood of implantation."

(Physicians Desk Reference (Montvale, NJ,: Medical Economics)

Syntex and Wyeth say the same thing about their pill. If you read in the tiny fine print at the bottom of your birth control instructions, you will be told that if you want more information about birth control pills ask your doctor, clinic or pharmacist. They have a more technical leaflet called the Professional Labeling, which you can read which goes into detail about what the pill really does. The lengthier explanation you can also read in the PDR.

Syntex and Wyeth say the same thing about their pill. If you read in the tiny fine print at the bottom of your birth control instructions, you will be told that if you want more information about birth control pills ask your doctor, clinic or pharmacist. They have a more technical leaflet called the Professional Labeling, which you can read which goes into detail about what the pill really does. The lengthier explanation you can also read in the PDR.

Bottom line the Pill does have a abortive mechamism. That is fact.

Marisa - posted on 03/20/2010

I wasn't going to comment because there are already so many posts! A few things I would like to clarify - Natural Family planning is NOT denying your husband. The fact that you abstain during your fertile time is a mutual agreement that you come to as a couple with prayerful consideration.
Also at our wedding I made a TOTAL GIFT OF SELF to mt husband - that includes my fertility. I don't think we should use methods to shut down something God created us to have and what makes us different from men.
NFP is extremely effective in both preventing and achieving pregnancy if you find the right method for you - Creighton, Billings, Sympto-Thermal and ecological breastfeeding. I have found that this method of family planning glorifies God in his creation of women!
If you are interested in more info check out CCLI.org creightonmodel.com or billingsnaturalfamilyplanning.org

Rita - posted on 03/19/2010

While it do believe it is true that children are gifts from God., I also think he expects us to us common sence. If you can afford to have one child after another, and still support them and give them all they NEED then that is fine, But often people cannot do that and then the children suffer due to that and I don't think that is right either.

I personally didn't have the temprement for more than the two I had. I would have not been a very good mother had I had more. So I guess it up to the individual, and how they think God is leading them.

Darla - posted on 03/19/2010

This is a really tricky subject... something I personally don't usually talk about because it can be controversial. First, let me say I admire your strength of character. Perhaps you are one of those few women who can have a great number of children (possibly one every 10 months or so) and it not affect their health. That would be a wonderful thing if you can do that and afford that many children. God bless you! Seriously, have as many children as you want. With your strength you will probably know... really know when you have had enough. But I'd like to tenderly say, that's probably one of the reason women of the old days didn't live very long... it is hard on your body. Birth control has been around for centuries, just in different forms. Egyptian women inserted the tips of an acacia shrub (plus dates, cotton, and honey). Body temperature fermented it into an ingredient now found in spermicides. A brew of alcohol and dried beaver testicle was used to prevent pregnancy during the 1700s.During WWII, a British company made cervical caps from rubber originally destined for hotel flooring. Women in Constantinople reportedly used a sponge dipped in lemon juice as a form of birth control.

With that said, I have a personal problem with "the pill". I read a book many years ago that uncovered the fact that you still get pregnant sometimes and the pill basically causes you to abort the baby. So I have a problem with that. But there are many many types of birth control. If you decided to use birth control there is nothing Biblical that tells you not to do so. There is one reference in the old testament that many people take out of context because a man spilled his seed - Gen. 38:9

Yes, it is definitely your decision. But remember, at any time, as a woman, you can change your mind!!! :) Sometimes, things that seemed soo important to us at one time, takes on a lesser importance later on. Keep your focus on Jesus.

Elizabeth - posted on 03/19/2010

I really feel that this is a question about God's sovereignty. I am not against birth control, and I am not for birth control. My husband and I have gone both routes. When we were first married, my son was conceived while I was on birth control. We have been going without birth control for almost a year now, trying to have another child, and it hasn't happened yet. Remember, our God is a God who caused a virgin to bear a child (a one time deal, I know), so nothing is out of his realm of possibility. For me, birth control is a bit of a moot point as far as whether or not you will actually have a child, since it is in God's hands anyways. However, I also believe that God has different plans and different ways of teaching us and stretching us, so I would never say that he hasn't led a couple to feel that He wants them to be using birth control as a part of His will.

SuAnne - posted on 03/18/2010

Although I don't believe there is anything "wrong" with birth control, it's something that we discontinued after our 4th child was born. People thought we were nuts, but we felt like God wanted us to trust Him with that part of our lives. He has since blessed us with 4 more children. :) I don't understand when people say "Only have what you can afford". If God blesses you with children, He will also provide the means for you to support them. We should trust Him with all areas of our lives... family size and finances included. Now, that said, I don't feel that all Christians are called to having large families just as they aren't all called to homeschool or other things like that. But, if God is asking you to trust Him with your family size... Let Him bring on the blessings!! He will never give you more than HE will provide for! :)

Dee Diana - posted on 03/17/2010

I hac two children 13 mo's apart when I was 20-21 then had tubs tied .Nine years later I truly wanted a baby so very bad and had to under go a painful tubal reversal I was fortunate to have had two more children .by this time I was 33-34 and had them tied again PLEASE DO NOT DO WHAT I DID !! Pray to our Lord and he will help you and your husband Be it 2 or 21 the lord already knows right
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Jennifer - posted on 03/15/2010

I keep hearing bc bc bc bc all the time...has anyone even TRIED NFP...its so simple. It is bc but using natural, harmless methods...the more i read everyone's lines the more i'm wondering why so many have not even thought of trying NFP. In my country, India...do you even know the kind of crazy population we have? Today, we have crossed China!!!! And do you all remember Mother Theresa??? Well, she tried NFP in a Calcutta slum...the place where the poorest live and breed like flies...she brought the birth rate down to 1.4%!!!!! Beat that!!! All using NFP...by teaching them how to figure out their body cycles and fertility times...and telling the men also how NFP works...Education is all!!! :) God bless.

Jaime - posted on 03/15/2010

Birth control pills are a sin to use! (I used them until I found out exactly how the Birth Control pill works).

The birth control pill does these three things:

1. Stopping ovulation (the release of an egg from the ovary). If an egg is not released then of course conception cannot take place.

2. Makes the mucus released by the cervix thicker so the sperm cannot get through.

The first two are not wrong, but #3 is:

3. Thins the lining of the uterus so a fertilized egg has difficulty implanting.

When are we "human"? We are human at the very point of conception or fertilization. So, a fertilized egg is a human being and if the pill is making the lining of the uterus thin so a fertilized egg (human being) cannot implant and grow, then what happens? The baby is aborted during the woman's monthly cycle and sadly she will never know.

Many "Christian" women are taking the pill and not even know how it works!

Danielle - posted on 03/14/2010

I completely agree with you on not taking it. Right after I had my second I was having really bad periods and my doctor prescribed the ring. Before using it, I did some research and the word that was used was "temporary infertility" when you stop taking it... REALLY. I totally admire you for trusting in the Lord and I agree that it is not (what I believe) to be part of His will for us.

Cori - posted on 03/13/2010

We became pregnant with my son while on birth control. When I had him by c-section they found out that one of my ovaries had been taken over by a cystic tumor. If I hadn't had him when I did I may have gotten the same condition on the other ovary and never had children and if he hadn't come by emergency c/s we wouldn't have known at all. I got pregnant on bc and with only one working ovary because it was God's timing.

I believe that birth control is our way of showing God that as far as our puny human wisdom goes we are not ready for children/more children. However, I know that he can change that plan at anytime (and we were certainly glad he did). If he can make a virgin's womb with child, he can certainly supersede our decision to use bc. But I also believe that is a personal choice over every couple. If a couple believes it is a sin, they should not do it. Good luck with whatever decision you make!

Chera - posted on 03/12/2010

I too agree with many of the other mommies on here that birth control is a very personal choice. This is a choice that you need to pray about and research to see what is right for you and your family. I used to be on birth control pills for several years and ended up getting really hormonally out of balanced and got sick. My O.B. actually said that my body was starting to reject the hormone and thats why I was feeling physically sick. She wanted to put me on another birth control pill with a different amount of hormone or something and I decided to do some research on my own, before just getting on another pill. So in research I discovered that forms of birth control that have hormones in them have a secondary effect of thinning the lining of the uterus. So basically, even though the docs say, the hormones are supposed to keep you from ovulating, this isn't always true. You can not absolutely know for sure that you are not ovulating. That is why there is this secondary effect, so if an egg does get fertilized (which I personally believe is the beginning of Life,) then the thinned uterus lining won't allow the fertilized egg to implant and the baby will be aborted. There were many times when I was on birth control pills that I did not feel well leading up to the final episode when I knew I needed to get off the stuff. I just wonder how many times I could have caused a fertilized egg to abort because of the thinning of the uterus. My husband and I just felt it was wrong to continue using the birth control pill when we found this out. I know this is a touchy subject and I do not mean to offend anyone in anyway. But I really do feel that this is a scary thing, because so many docs, do tell you that all birth control pills, and IUD's really do is stop ovulation, but that isn't true. If you just do your own research on the internet and really look at many different sites, you can see that the birth control pill and IUD's and some other forms of birth control do have the secondary effect of thinning the uterus lining, and that is to keep the possible fertilized egg from implanting.
Therefore my position is I do not agree with the birth control options that can cause basically conception to abort. And after the issue I had with just my reaction to hormones in the birth control, I am really against adding any hormonal stuff to my system, you never really know what that stuff is doing to your body. I think every Mommy needs to do some soul searching and find out what she feels is right for her own body though. I think it is wonderful that there are mommies out there that want to have as many children as they can and they are comfortable with that and that they feel God is leading them in that path. I respect people that can do that, like the Duggar family, they are such a faithful amazing family. Ultimately God is in control, but we are also living in the flesh of this world, so we are responsible for what we do to our bodies too.

Leah - posted on 03/12/2010

as an OB nurse in an area with a large apostolic luthern population that aren't alloed to use birth control u can say that many of those women are more depressed with every pregnancy. they love their children but when you have so many it is hard to manage your own self. i am a strong christian who it took 7 years of infertility to have a son and i can't believe that my God would want you to live depressed because you won't do something as simple as birth control. it is similar to the people who say infertility treatments are wrong because we are "playing God", tell that to the women who long for a baby every day. we all make our own decisions but that is why God gave us free will....

Theresa - posted on 03/12/2010

There is a book called, "Be Fruitful and Multiply" It's a study guide about what the Bible says about Birth Control.

My husband and I have practiced natural family planning and it does work, if you are prayfully committed. We wanted more children. Yes, we had 7 losses, but it was while we were trying to have more. I would like to have one more if God is willing. Yes, if God wants you to have more, then you will. On the other hand bc can kill your child, as it did my first loss. The chemicals can cause more problems later on, even sterility. Who are we to say, we are in control. I think that by taking bc, we are saying that we don't trust God when He says, He will not give us more than we can handle and He will give us what we need. My husband doesn't make big bucks, he makes less than some teachers, but we have managed on his income and even tithe. God provides, we just have to be disciplined enough to know what to do with his blessings. I know I have strong convictions but I have learned a lot. I suffer from Anti-Phosopholipids Syndrome. I didn't have it until after I took bc and lost the first baby. Yes, I blame the fact that I put foreign chemicals in my body, now every time I get pg. I have a High chance of losing that baby. Losing a baby because God calls it home is a lot better than losing it because I killed it with bc.

If you choose to use bc...that is your choice, I am just sharing my experiences and pain. I love kids and always wanted a big family....I will when I get to Heaven I will see all of my blessings, but until then I will enjoy the little blessings that I have the honor of caring for on this earth.

Theresa - posted on 03/12/2010

I used birth control after my first and got pregnant with my second. She turned out fine, but I was able to stop it immediately upon finding out I was pregnant. I took the depo shot after having her and got pregnant again. I didn't know that I was pregnant but told the doctor that I was experience pregnancy like symptoms. Ignorantly I listened to him when he said that it was the bc giving me those symptoms and let him give me the next shot. I then called because I felt more symptoms...including movement...the doctor didn't believe me and wouldn't take a look. I began bleeding, which never happened in the year and a half I was on the shot. I passed an unusual clot and called the doctor again. He told me it was a fluke period. I finally talked to a nurse practitioner, who asked me if I had taken a pg test. I took the test and it was positive.... she forwarded me onto the appointment desk right away. I heard the doctor in the background talking. They didn't get me in until 2 weeks later. I lost that baby, and the doctor never acknowledged that I was pregnant....no D&C...nothing... 2years later I was in tremendous pain from Endometriosis. The Dr. then mentioned that it was due to a miscarriage. I now have more problems staying pregnant. I have four wonderful children, but I have lost 7. I blame it on bc. I am with you, the chemicals in bc are not worth it! Who are we to chose whether we are blessed with children. That is God's department. I treasure each of my children and wish I had NEVER taken bc.

Liz - posted on 03/12/2010

Every child is precious and if you can afford to care for a large family and it is your desire to have a large family then I think you should stick with your beliefs. However, I don't think it is wrong to use birth control.

Jennifer - posted on 03/11/2010

I agree with you and your husband Ashley. God gives us kids as gifts. He also gives us free will to choose. Have you heard of Natural Family Planning (NFP) method recommended by the Catholic Church? I suggest you google search it and have a read through. We are catholics and my husband and I have one son, 20months old. We don't plan on having another, and we use NFP. It works wonderfully. It uses simple body biology and timing and so far we've been successful. I hope NFP is a good enough solution to your query. It doesn't recommend contraceptives but you can avoid getting preg or plan your children well. You just have to learn your fertility cycle :). God bless.

Sally - posted on 03/11/2010

I have never used any form of contraception (unless you count breast feeding). But we so far only have one child. Knowing how long it has taken to fall pregnant the second time and how badly we want it - still trying. I cannot at this stage imagine doing anything to prevent such a miracle.

Victoria - posted on 03/11/2010

When God lead my husband and I to start using a birth control method, we did much research, from many sources, both regular medical, christian medical and many others too.

There is a misconception that hormonal birth control terminates pregnancy's, only the morning after pill is able to do that which is basically an OVERDOSE of hormones, regular hormonal contraceptives whether, the pill, patch, injection or implant stop the female from producing eggs. No egg, No fertalisation, No conception, No pregnancy. If you take hormonal contraceptives you are NOT terminating a pregnancy without knowing, you are stopping the production of eggs so that you can't conceive.

That being said God is still the author of life and if He has a child or children in His plan for your life, birth control means nothing.

Chelly - posted on 03/11/2010

Birth control is a personal choice, like others have said... but so is multiple sex partners, lying, stealing etc. I stopped taking birth control when I learned that the pill causes your baby to abort. You still get pregnant on the pill and not know it... It's not PREGNANCY control, it's BIRTH control.

"Abortifacients (birth controls) work after fertilization (conception) by killing the newly conceived human. These include oral contraceptives (the "Pill"), IUD, Norplant, Depo-Provera, Emergency Contraception (the "Morning-After Pill"), and anti-fertility vaccines."

My husband and I were grieved when we found this out as in the 5 years we were married, how many children did we abort, how many of his sons? I know that YHWH has grace and mercy for me and we have asked forgiveness for our ignorance.

From that point we started using the Lady Comp. It's awesome, you can see what I've written about it here...
http://www.onlythebreast.com/?page_id=59
Family planning (NFP)is in the bible and believe that it's okay to have some control over our family planning. God wants us to have wisdom in these areas.

Kate - posted on 03/11/2010

Personally I dont think that our loving Heavenly Father would be angry with a woman for using birth control. He is all powerful and if you are need to have a baby right now then birth control wont help. Case in point... my mother.... she was set to have hysterectomy because she had the start of cervical cancer. So she had to be on meds for one month that shrinks your uterus and turns it kind of into a raisen. Durring the month while she had her period and they used a condom my parents conceived my sister. Also with the meds drying out my moms uterus she should have miscarried but she didnt and at her month check up they found out she was pregnant. Now I have a 7 year old sister who is healthy and was carried to term. SO..... my mom and dad needed to have my sister. And God stepped in and made it happen though it all.

MaryEllen - posted on 03/11/2010

My husband & I have been married for 25 years. We have never used birth control. We have two children. Simply because God controls your family size doesn't mean you will have a large family.

I'm curious what you think of the story of Tamar in Genesis 38. In particular, verses 6-9

Sharee - posted on 03/10/2010

I personally believe that God gave dr's the intelligence to creat birth control once the earth's population started getting high.. we have fewer diseases, etc that people die from to slow the population. Now we have the choice of how many we want to have, and the God-given intuition of when we are "done". My grandmother had her tubes tied after her seventh child-my mom. She proceeded to get pregnant again and had to have a hysterectomy. God will make a child that is meant to be happen, but I feel that you have a responsibility to the children he gives you to give them the best upbringing- whether that is 2,4, or 10 depends on you, but birth control gives you the opportunity to keep your sanity when you need it, without worrying about getting pregnant "right now"- knowing that if God has other plans, then okay.

Linnea - posted on 03/10/2010

I think it is important to be responsible and continually asking God if He wants you to have more children or not. That said, I used to use birth control - the pill. For quite a while God challenged my husband and I to stop using it and eventually I found out some new research about the pill that made me finally quit it - all forms of the pill and all hormone based birth control (i.e. the shot, the pill, etc...) are abortive. Meaning, if you did get pregnant the hormones from the pill would abort the baby without you ever knowing you had been pregnant. No matter how small, a baby is a baby so I felt it is wrong to use this form of birth control for this reason. I do believe in birth controls still though and use the Fertility Awareness Method, and I used the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." Basically, you learn how your body works and what days you could potentially get pregnant through charting your cervical fluid and waking temperatures, and during those potentially fertile days you either avoid sex or use a condom. It is really easy once you get used to it, and very empowering to know exactly what is going on with your body, and veeeerrry effective when done correctly (99 percent effectiveness or something, or if you use condoms then its as effective as the fail rate of the condom). I personally feel like for me it is a little bit irresponsible to just have sex, no birth control, all the time, and just figure that God will only give you a baby if He wants you to have one...that is probably a calling some families have and that is great but that is not for everyone. Fertility Awareness Method can help you either avoid or achieve pregnancy and the information you learn about your body and your cycle is something I believe all women should know!

Shannon - posted on 03/10/2010

I am against it. God will bless you with as many children He sees fit. Taking BC is doing your own will & not Gods.

Jackie - posted on 03/10/2010

Hello, I am 50 years old and just would like to share this story with you. In Brief, you are correct, God is in Charge! Praise God! When I was younger and first married I was on the pill, faithfully! Within our first year, we were pregnant with our very blessed daughter. She was born 6 wks premature and initially not given much hope for survival, this was 30 years ago. Today she is married with one daughter and one on the way. A very on fire Christian couple who will continue to bless many! My first marriage ended in divorce, I was remarried and using, the diaphragm, condom, as well as still on the pill. Well, God blessed us with a very blessed daughter, again within our first year of marriage! She is 25, married and has such a wonderful impact on many people, who I never would've reached. Now much later, no longer taking the pill (what was the point!), we used condoms, and as I was very regular we kept track on the cycle. Which appeared to work for the next 10 years. Then when I was 36, we were blessed with a wonderful boy who today at 14 is among one of the most maturing young Christian men you will find, he isn't shy at sharing his convictions with young or old. Now, with the Dr. being concerned at my age, it was suggested to have my tubes tied, however, with further consultation, we decided, to continue the condom and cycle method. At the age of 40, our youngest son was born, he is almost 10, and I cannot tell you how much joy he and his brother have added to our extended family as well as our newly acquired mission field that the Lord has given us!
Now, after our last son, as a result of complications with me, we did decide to have a Lazar tubal, I can't tell you that this was a joyful decision, I can tell you it was not without lots of prayer and Christian counsel as for the health of myself, to be around to take my part in raising these wonderful children! To quote my second daughter in a family planning unit in school, "You mean you can do that?", we have cleared up any misconception on our home.
You can make your plan, and then if God's plan follows your plan, you think, "Wow we are so smart!", You can make your plan and then rest assured, He is in control and His plan is what is truly the best plan for you, as He knows what's in store and how He plans to grow His Kingdom through you! In our best of intentions, we NEVER, would've planned our children in this unique order! We Praise God that HE loves us and cares for us so much that HE took care of us with HIS plan! I hope this will help you and your husband on your journey! God Bless you!

Sofia - posted on 03/10/2010

Well I do Natural Family Planning, which gives you some how a little bit of control over it, but at the same time as it is natural God works it 's way if is His will for you to have a child. I don't think contraception is good, I think it makes us just to think about our sleves and fulfiling our desires. I think fertility is a gift from God that shouldn't be supresed with contraception, we should work with it and try to undertand it in a natural way...

Sitka - posted on 03/09/2010

Hmmm.... I think NOT using birth control is wrong when- 1) you have too many kids to meet the needs of your spouse. 2) you have too many kids to effectively raise the ones you already have and 3) you are pregnant so often you cannot get your own health under control. That being said, I have 4 kids, and eventually want more, I just want to space them out a little so I can do the best with what God has already given me. There is nothing in the Bible that says it is wrong.

Chanda - posted on 03/09/2010

Back in times where a large family was needed to support the homestead, no tusing birth control was important. However, civilization has changed and it is no longer a matter of more children equals more people to work the land. I don't believe God is against birth control. After all, He knows he can overcome it if he wishes. Remember Job. Just because God loves you does not mean he won't allow the devil to make your life difficult. That will cover anything from financial worries to illness and death of loved ones. The important thing is to keep your joy of life and faith in God. No matter how difficult life is here, it will be an entirely different story in His kingdom.

Birth control is a very personal choice. I, personally, believe in it. I hope all of our opinions are helpful in your decision.

India - posted on 03/09/2010

i am a christain mommy that uses birth control and i feel like God puts everything in our reach for a reason and i feel that when the time is right for my husband and i to have another baby i will stop the birth control cause God knows that at the time i could not handle another one.

Kristi - posted on 03/09/2010

I am expecting my 7th child and never thought I'd have that many! Several years ago I felt that God was dealing with me on this issue and searched the scriptures to see what He says. Children are a gift; blessed is the man whose quiver is full; multiply; etc. I was asked by another Christian once, "doesn't it say something in the Bible about taking care of your family's needs?" Yes. If God clothes and feeds the birds, how much more will he take care of you. Do not worry about what you will eat, wear, etc. God is capable and wants to provide for our needs.
This is something that God has spoken to my husband and I about. We hear comments at our church and in the community like, "Do you know how this happens?" or "Is this going to be the last one?" We trust God to do what He says he will and we've not regretted it.

Kristen - posted on 03/09/2010

I believe that God will direct you and your husband into the choice to use or not use birth control. We used natural family planning and had three wonderful children that we "planned" and prayed for. At that point we were happy and "done" but did not feel the calling or direction to use any other birth control option. Four years later we were blessed with child #4 who was planned by no one but God. We welcomed this child, but we also felt strongly that 4 was enough. Now, husband is "fixed" and we have no regrets. God is moving us to another stage of life, and that feeling is re-enforced regularly. I have full peace and trust that 4 kids was his will for our family -- no more, no less.

Belinda - posted on 03/08/2010

Yes, I believe in using birth control. With or without it, there are always risks. But I believe it is a personal decision. Some women need to take it for health reasons, etc. I had to for health reasons. I no longer need it, due to having a partial hysterectomy, because of cancer. Thankfully I was blessed with 2 beautiful sons before this happened.

Heather - posted on 03/08/2010

As this is the other hot topic right now, I just wanted to remind everyone to read the community guidelines. This is a site to honor God and help other moms, not attack each other.

Sarah - posted on 03/08/2010

I'm all for birth control...but that is my personal opinion of course. :)

Cynthia - posted on 03/08/2010

Natural Family planning we are open to life at all times. I know someone said it seemed harmful to withhold sex from there husband. We dont have to, there is no chastity belt. We can have sex at anytime, however we know that it could lead to a child. At this point i want to finish nursing my child so we are being very careful. When we have a week to two weeks a month when we withhold it helps us grow in our relationship. Thats why couples who NFP have a almost non existent rate of divorce. Personally i think its impowering to know how my body really works.

Stephanie - posted on 03/08/2010

Id would agree. I think in many ways it can be more harmful to not have sex during the a woman's "fertile" time. Not only is that the time of month she has a better sensation(a higher 'chance of haveing and orgasm) and hey i would hate to abstain from sex at those times. also even in a 'perfectly health woman that time of month can change every now and then anyways so its not like clock work.
Tho as a cuple if they both agree thay dont want more kids(then) then there is nothing wrong with abstaining from having sex when she is most fertile. He can ask if she is and let it be either way. He doesn't have to be all bent out of shape if she is fertile at the time. He can in other wise be a man about it. (haha ahhh)
I my self would like to start useing a pill form of birthconrole (pills becouse comdums dont work that great for us) and if later on we wanted more kids then we would be able to easyer then if either i got my tubes tyed or his cliped. (those dont always work either i have afew storys in the family where it has not worked)
I would say if someone trusted God then they would get pregnant or that they would in "timeing"(if they havent been able to get pregnant) becouse God has given us brains to work with. its like saying to someone trust God your kids will not sin but not teaching them what is wrong. or like saying to someone who is dealthy ill God will save them they dont need drugs. But God hasd given us drugs to use(jsut have to know how to use them.)(sure not all drugs are good to use but others are we live in a sinful world but not everything is sinful)
i could go on. but it is a personal choice. If God is tell you to not use it(aftore much prayer) then do not use it it would be wrong to. tho God has not told other familys not to. and in other words i spose God has told them it is alright to use some kinds(im agenst a tipe of birthcontrole that would just abort a fertilized egg insted of perventing an egg from being fertilized.)

Sheri - posted on 03/08/2010

Julie, great thoughts you shared. I was going by my interpetation that some thought birth control was wrong, but you are absolutely correct, family planning prevents pregnancy. and I do not deny my husband of sex, lol, as I let him choose when we are ready to have our next child; I just inform him of our chances when that 'time of oppportunity' arises ;^) Honestly, he has much more self control than i do =)

Heather - posted on 03/08/2010

Julie, that made a lot of since. Like I said in an earlier post, I know that many moms are against certain types of birth control because they actually just cause early abortions. Natural planning would prevent that. The Bible does say that it is okay to deny each other for a time with mutual consent. This might be applied here. Not that I use natural planning, or have even really ever thought about it, but you made me think, so thanks!

Julie - posted on 03/08/2010

I think (?) there were a few people who mentioned natural planning for birth control.

My understanding is the bible says not to "deny each other" without a good reason...

Keeping that in mind, why do some people think birth control is worse than natural planning?

Because, if you look at them, both of them are human ways of preventing pregnancy - if people who avoid birth control because they want to leave falling pregnant entirely in God's hands, by the same logic, they should be against natural planning - because by choosing not to have sex during fertile times, they are controlling their chances of pregnancy, the same as birth control does.

Both natural planning and birth control can fail (albeit at different rates)...

but basically, I don't know how people who are against birth control purely for preventing pregnancies are fine with natural planning? to me, for the aim of preventing pregnancy, they achieve exactly the same thing.

Of course, there are other things to consider - some people need birth control for health reasons other than pregnancy related things, while other people can't use birth control because of side effects, or prefer to avoid side effects, some people just don't want chemicals in their body, etc - so obviously there are many many things that effect people's decision to use birth control or not, but if we're purely talking about preventing pregnancy, how is natural planning any different from birth control when it comes to interfering with God's will?

Given the choice between natural planning or birth control, I actually find naturally planning the choice that makes me feel uncomfortable to use - as the thought of denying a husband sex when he wants it just in case we might get pregnant would be the one that would make me uncomfotable as a christian.

I wonder if anyone else has thought about it that way?

Sheri - posted on 03/08/2010

hmmm, I tried to read through all the replies =) but did not notice anyone who chooses 'natural birth control'. I have been married 18 years, we have 6 children, I am not on birth control BUT I do know when I ovulate, then exactly 17 days later I know to expect my period. All our children were "planned" intentionally except 1 ( #4~ we would have waited another year) and why did we get an early "surprise"? Because due to menstrual hemmoraging I was told to go on 'the pill' for 6 months before deciding to have a hysterectomy or not(???) and when I went to schedule a check up we had a lovely surprise. We went back to 'natural planning', and had 2 more when we planned it.

We are not "against" b.c. just personally feel it is a healthier choice for me.

~Sheri

My-Thuy - posted on 03/07/2010

I dont think just like Ally that God has anything agaisnt Birth contorl. as being human beings God gave us free will/choice to do what we feel is right. I think its also a personnal choice and finical situation. I honestly cannot afford another child. if i have more then one, i dotn think i will be able to properly raise the both of them the way they should be raised with a roof over their heads and food and clothes.

Natasha - posted on 03/06/2010

As a christian I do have problems with some forms of birth control, especially the IUD's that usually work by stopping a fertilised egg from implanting rather than stopping conception. I am just not comfortable with aborting the start of a life at any stage, even early on. The whole miracle of conception in my view shouldn't be ended like that.
I also feel uneasy about the permanentness of being "fixed". I don't believe it is God's desire for every christian couple to have loads of babies but I do feel couples should stay open to God's plan for their lives and having more children should be something that stays open to God's will as we can't see into the future and don't know what God has in store for us down the tracks.
We have 3 children and are open to having more but we have found natural family planning to be wonderful for us. We use the fertility signs God has provided for us and it is great to be able to communicate as a couple in this area and not worry about the effects of artificial birth controls.

Julie - posted on 03/06/2010

I have implanon implanted... which some people will think is kind of strange as I'm not having sex (I'm not currently married and don't have sex outside of marriage) but for me it's a health issue. I have PCOS and have crippling agonising periods that would otherwise leave me unable to care for my daughter one week out of every month.

Considering my ex husband is a violent drug addict who beat myself and our daughter, my parents are little better, my friends aren't in a position to help out...

I tried for months to struggle through it, and then decided getting the implanon implant was the only solution left. It's obviously not stopping a pregnancy as no sex = no chance of getting pregnant, but I don't see contraceptives for conraception as being a problem.

Some people say trust in God... but we also have to take responsibility too. We can't just do as we please and expect God to pick up the pieces of our choices.

As people have said, if God wants us to have a child, he will make it happen. Doctors are stunned I fell pregnant with my daughter when I did. My husband and I had decided to use contraception for a few years after we got married so we could prepare for a child properly. I was still at uni, and my husband was only work 10-15 hours a week at the time.

I believe it was respect to God to not bring a child into the world until we had the ability to afford it - and I don't know where most people are from, but there is such a thing as genuinely not being able to afford a child. Particularly in the current economic climate where getting and keeping a job is hard and welfare doesn't even remotely provide enough to live on.

Unfortunately, I discovered only after I married my husband, that he had serious mental health issues. Six months after we got married, he got fired from his job and got heavily into drugs. He started becoming abusive.

I know people say trust in God, and he won't bring a child into a situation like that but I can guarantee that is totally wrong. I had to have surgery and had to stop all types of hormonal contraception until I was back on my feet again. I figured since I'd just had major surgery, sex wouldn't be an issue.

The day after I got out of hospital, my husband raped me and that's how my daughter was conceived.

You'd think then of all times God wouldn't have allowed me to get pregnant. But there are plenty of christian rape victims who fall pregnant.

After my daughter was born, my husband had a massive breakdown and tried to kill me a few times etc. I loved him and wanted him to get help, not leave him, but with what he was doing to me, there is no way I could risk bringing another child into that situation - God already allowed one child to be brought into that situation and I believe it would have been careless and disrespectful (to God, to my husband, to my daughter) to risk bringing another child into that situation.

For whatever reason, God does not always choose to protect us from difficult things - and that includes letting previously wonderful husbands break down and become violent, and letting rape victims fall pregnant - it is up to us to take some responsibility for our actions and their consequences.

Preventing a pregnancy is very different from ending one. Sperm and eggs are not human beings - it is only once they get together that they become human (both morally and scientific).

Sadly I know all too many lovely christian women who marry men who appear to be wonderful christian men only for them to have breakdowns or turn to drugs or whatever. As christians, we don't believe in divorce, but there are plenty of circumstances where it's not safe to bring a child into that situation. And my example proves that God will not always protect women from falling pregnant in bad situations.

Birth control for many christian women is about being responsible. Protecting their husbands and any children they already have.

I've never understood the catholic church's condemnation of birth control outright. As long as it's not promoting adultery, birth control can be a good thing.