Hearing God

Christene - posted on 02/21/2010 ( 32 moms have responded )

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Ok I am struggling with a very important decision and I can't seem to know if I am hearing God or if I am putting my own wishes in place of God's voice. Here is the gist; I am 38 and just gave birth to my second child in January. When I adopted my first son 7 years ago things were wonderful and I felt I knew exactly what I was suppose to do. Now I feel I should leave my career and be a stay at home mom. Not because my second son is one that I gave birth too but because he is our last chance at a child. He truly a gift from God considering science says he was not possible.

Long story short
6 yrs of fertility
7 yrs ago adopted beautiful son from Guatemala (he came home at 3 1/2 months)
tumor removed from uterus Aug 2008
pregnant May 2009
son born Jan of 2010

I have been a teacher for more than 15 years and have always loved what I do but due to budgets my job has changed and I still like teaching but not loving what I teach. Now I feel these are signs that I should stay home and enjoy the last few years of my first sons childhood before he turns teen and enjoy my new son.

How do you know when God give you signs or when you are trying to put your desires as his. Searching for advice and peace on this situation.

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Frances M - posted on 03/29/2010

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Luke 14:28 "For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it;

You are doing this.

James 1:6 But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind.

Mark 11:23 "For assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'Be removed and be cast into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says.
Mark 11:24 "Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.
Mark 11:25 "And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses.
Mark 11:26 "But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses."

When in doubt - don't. If you can't do something in faith, don't do it.

2 Tim 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

Remember fear is from Satan. He uses it to stop us from doing what God wants us to do.

Finally, who, other than yourself do you trust to teach your children about Jesus and the Biblical principles that guide us?

Deu 11:19 "You shall teach them to your children, speaking of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.

You say you are not teaching what you want. Become a sub and occasionally you will get a call to teach what you love. The need for good teachers will never go away. This time with your children will last your whole life. Savoring memories is so special. I am 66 years old and do not regret being home with my children. The job market was still there after they were grown.

Finally God guides us with peace. Termoil, troubled thoughts, anxiety, fear & confussion are not from God. They are the oposite of peach. Peace is calm confidence. Find peace and stay in it.

John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

John 16:33 "These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."

Rom 14:19 Therefore let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another.

1 Cor 14:33 For God is not the author of confusion but of peace, as in all the churches of the saints.

Phil 4:6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God;
Phil 4:7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Col 3:15 And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful.

1 Pet 3:11 Let him turn away from evil and do good; Let him seek peace and pursue it.

I pray God will show you his will and you will have peace (calm confidence) in your final decision. God bless you. Fran

Victoria - posted on 02/22/2010

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If God is telling you to do something He will give you a scripture to back it up. He doesn't always give you signs, but He will always give you His word. Ask Him for a word for your situation, He is faithful & He will give you one.

Charity - posted on 04/01/2010

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Just keep praying about it and you will hear the answer...remember "The blessings of the Lord make rich and adds no sorrow with it" What possible harm could there be in staying at home with your children and enjoying them, raising them to be Godly men? In August of '09 I choose to stay at home with my two children and it has been the best decision I've ever made. I prayed about it a lot and it just so happen that things at my job at the time were not going so great and I ended up having to quit and it is awesome. I say go for and God will provide. He knows the plans that he has for you and your family and they are not plans to harm you. Continue to seek him first and everything will line up in your favor =). God bless you!

~Charity

Vanessa - posted on 03/28/2010

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Hi Christine.When you are tosses to and fro and have no peace then the answers is no but when there is a peace and no doubt then there is God. He does not wavier. God Bless

Starla - posted on 02/22/2010

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Well you have been blessed either way. To work as a teacher is a blessing but to be a stay at home mom is a blessing too! One way our pastor put it, God leads, but satan pushes. If doors are opening for to stay home then go for it!!! Also if you find yourself arguing with yourself, then I have always found that is God trying to tell me to do something and I am afraid to do it, so I argue whether it is Him or not. I will pray for you! Be blessed either way you decide!!

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Frances M - posted on 03/31/2010

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Another good book is "Experiencing God" by Anderson. We took the course in at our church (Baptist) in KS. You might check with a local church to see if they are offering the course. I've taken a lot of Bible courses over the past 60 years and can honestly say that was the most helpful. Fran

Pamela - posted on 03/30/2010

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I'm reading a really good book right now by Joyce Meyer. It talks about hearing from God and it's great. Since I started reading it, I feel I hear God better than I did before. It's a great book. I don't have it with me but it's called the Battefield of the Mind. Remember life is short and it could be over tomorrow. Good luck with everything.

Tina - posted on 03/30/2010

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Hi Christene,
It can be difficult to learn to discern the voice of God vs. our own desires! Remember that God always leads by peace. You should have PEACE about your decision!
I have a Women's Ministry and do Bible Study groups, we have done two lessons on this topic. You can access the notes on our website. Hope this helps.
Praying for you, God bless. Rev. Tina
www.heart-of-compassion.org
click on "women's ministry" tab, then scroll down to links of Bible studies.
They are titled "Spirit led" and "Being led by the Spirit" I believe....

Tomesa - posted on 03/29/2010

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hi christene,

i used to struggle so much with hearing God versus hearing myself that for a moment i stopped speaking to Him. after much difficulty in 2010, i have realized that one of the clearest possible ways to hear God is by listening to your heart and intuition--that is His Voice that you hear! since this is such a huge decision...perhaps you should consider taking a fast or getting super close to God during this time so that you can discern His voice.

but just from reading your post--i think you have already heard Him and know what to do :o)

Claudia - posted on 03/28/2010

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being a mom to four, a child who was somewhat adopted by my stepmom and somehow always feeling i wasnt equal to her kids i have to say this.... i think even if you adopted the second child or even if you had both you would still have these feelings. if you feel a calling to be home then that is what you should do. for 15 years you have given a ift to probably thousands of children and you have done something as a mom i would like to thank you for. now its your turn! can you make it just on your hubs income, will you be happy not working, can you stay at home but maybe look in to being a online teacher? things to think about. good luck to you and i send you my blessings

Anne - posted on 03/28/2010

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You've been a great teacher to others,I think its time for you to listen to the voice within,God has always been generous to you,its time for you to step out of your old routines,and embrace the graces of God.Remember this,when you do the right thing at the wrong time youll get paid,but doing the right thing at the right time youll be rewarded.Focus on what you want and not what you need,anyway God will provide everything as long as you hold on to his promises.God bless.

Christene - posted on 03/28/2010

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Just an update I go back tomorrow to work and finish off the school year. I have decided to leave my job at the end of the year and be a SAHM and I am very much looking forward to it.

thank you for all the guidance and advice that you have all given me. I look forward to the next few years and asking questions to the experienced SAHM.

Christene

Maricel - posted on 03/27/2010

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if you have the opportunity to stay home with your blessings from God...you can still be a teacher maybe by homeschooling them! and as the others said God will lead you...i know its hard..i'm in the same situation...I have 3 yr.old twingirls staying home...and praying if i should homeschool or not..i do want to but i feel i'm not patient enough...but everyday i think God is making it clear to homeschool unless we can afford a chritian school..i'll be praying for you! this miracle baby is such a blessing so maybe enjoy the time and stay home with both of them!

Sheryl - posted on 03/27/2010

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i well i would also look at fins. part of this. if you can afford it and know that everthing would be ok and that you really feel like you should be at home with them then do it. not just for the lil one but the big one to. make sure that they know it also cause you want to be at home with him. i would also really prayer about it. cause i have been out of the work force know for about 4 years and i can't find a job because of the econ. being so bad. not that i don't love being home with my kids it just finsh. in my set.! but that just may point of view. and best wishs and god bless you and your family!

Jill - posted on 03/24/2010

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if it's .God's will ...things go smoother than if its your will ...take a leap of faith.....

Casey - posted on 03/24/2010

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Put out a fleece, like Ezekiel did. God understands that those who want to follow Him in all things will do as we are told and test the spirits. It's hard to know sometimes if we are listening to His voice or our own.

Gina - posted on 03/20/2010

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Try randomly opening the Bible and reading. Sometimes the answer is right in the text.

If that doesn't provide validation for what you probably already know, I would recommend to follow your heart. What you are feeling "urged" to do is usually what you "should be" doing.

Best wishes to you in making your decision.

Blessings,
Gina

Anne - posted on 03/20/2010

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I will be Praying for what ever plan God has for you that He will give you the desires of your heart.

Rita - posted on 03/19/2010

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Sometimes God puts those desires in our hearts. The Bible says he wants to give us the desires of our hearts, so I think often they can be one in the same. Another way to know if it is Gods will is to see if your will lines up with His word. I have always believed it was God's will for mother to be stay at home Moms if it is at all finacially possible, even if the family had to do with a little less. I think the man was to be the provider and the mother was to be the caregiver. I know some women will diagree with me on that, but I still believe it to be true.

When both children are in school, you can always go back to teaching. There will always be a need for teacher and by then you will be a better teacher than you are now because you will have given your children the nurturing they needed before they started school, and besides you won't be so warn out at the end of the day and will still have something left of yourself to give to your husband.

Beth - posted on 03/19/2010

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I don't believe there's a concrete way to "hear" God, but I do believe if you pray about something you will know what the right answer is because it gives you peace in your heart. Sounds like you have a difficult decision to make and I will pray for you!

Lynette - posted on 03/19/2010

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Also remember that if your sure that this is what God wants, He will provide for you.

Lynette - posted on 03/19/2010

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That's a difficult one. All i can suggest is pray alot and maby ask if God could give you confirmation through the bible. I have one child and about 6 month's ago I felt that God told me to have a second child (we were only planning to have one in around 2 years) that i could still handle but then realised that God was also telling me to quit my job. that was very scary but once i was convinced that i was meant to do it i asked God when.. To cut a long story short my boss ended up alowing me to work half day from home for almost the same salary. everything happens for a reason and even if the task seems daunting we have to trust that our Father know's best and will always look after us.



If you want, you can read my testimony on http://www.godscreation.co.za/GodsCreati...



Goodluck

p.s Im 7 weeks pregnant

Halle - posted on 03/18/2010

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You and I have something in common...I taught high school biology for 13 years. AFter my second son was born in July 2008, I went back to work for about 6 months. I wanted for years to stay home, but was too fearful of finances. My husband is self-employed, so we'd lose our health insurance, pension, retirement, everything. OUr family has been through some health problems, so we were denied by some health insurance providers and it is very expensive for us. Last spring, while still agonizing over whether to resign my teaching career, I was in a study at church called "Experiencing God" (you can purchase the book anywhere) and it really changed my life. Much of the book is about developing a strong relationship with Christ so you can hear when the Holy Spirit speaks to you, and how you "know" if it is God or not. Long story...I decided to resign and did so this past November. I wish I'd done it sooner and spent more time with my first son who is now 4. Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:25-34 not to worry about our provision. This passage really helped me make my decision. I am so so much happier now, and I see a big difference in my children, especially my older son. He is much more affectionate with me and less aggressive. The boys haven't been sick all winter, thank God! They were always sick in the winter from daycare. I could go on and on, but I hope you will trust God and listen to Him. Maybe all moms aren't meant to stay to home, but I was. I finally feel like I've found my calling and am truly happy.

Christene - posted on 02/28/2010

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I want to thank all of you for your advice I am leaning toward staying home if we can financially afford it. I really feel that God has opened many doors for this but I will finish out my contract and make sure this is the right thing for me.

Evelyn - posted on 02/23/2010

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Hi Christine, I was offered a job last year and it was probably the third biggest decision I've had to make in my life, and I'm 36 years old. Prior, to that offer I worked as an administrator with an Oil Service company and the salary was good. Everyone told me not to leave, they cited examples and gave me intelligent reasons why I shouldn't take this offer especially as it was a yearly Consultancy position. But...something deep within me just kept saying, go for it, step out on to the water, I can't say it was God, because it was such a struggle. Long story short, I took the offer and a month after my former company was sold and as I write this thousands of people are going to lose their jobs! Fear or uncertainty is not always an indication that God is not in agreement. My advice, go somewhere quiet and listen, then act on what YOU BELIEVE GOD is asking you to do, Shalom.

Linda - posted on 02/22/2010

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I don't think you can ever go wrong by putting your family first. You can always go back to your career later. I was a teacher and later a software engineer, but I left my job when my first son was born 18 years ago. I have never regretted it. I was making a good deal of money, and we don't go on extravagant vacations and rarely eat out. However, God has blessed is and given my husband a good job which is able to provide for our family (of 4 boys now.) Also,you didn't mention what your husband's perspective is on this, but I think it is crucial that you are both on the same page. If he supports you coming home, and you make a financial plan to live on less income, both you and your sons will benefit in the long run.

Rabecca - posted on 02/22/2010

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That is a tough one but maybe not the same situation but at the time I really did not seem to understand my voice and wishes really were getting in the way of God in my life I just wanted something so bad I kept over looking the real signs of God telling me to get out looking back I can see so clearly that I spent years avioding what my heart was really being told until one day I knew it was time. but it still pains me to think of the years I wasted on what could have really been a blessed time in my life in reality I was not being given the blessing I could have been if I would have really heard his vioce and gave up what I really thought I wanted and followed his plan for my life.
I did eventaully give over my control and eventhough I did there is still some hurt from that situation he has really brought me to a place of real blessings and fufillment in my life but being still and knowing that his plan was greater than my desires was hard I want to have complete control and giveing that up was not easy it a real stuggle of mine that I pray about it allthe time it really seems like when things start to fall apart its just him reminding me to trust in him that he only wants to bless me but I have to really stop getting in the way of that he knows the plans he has for you trust in him he will tell your heart what it is you are supposed to do .

Heather - posted on 02/22/2010

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One of the other moms had asked if you were able to go back in a few years if you needed to, or wanted to after your kids were grown, could you be a substitute teacher and only work one day every other month or something so that you can still show your teaching activity and not just five (or eighteen) years of raising kids. Just to keep your resume active.

I will pray for God to show you the right direction.

Christene - posted on 02/22/2010

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Thank you ladies for you guidance and advice I am currently leaning towards being a stay at home my. My words that I told my JH students keeps coming back to me that if I ever didn't like what I did I would leave that position. Students don't need a teacher who doesn't want to be there. They need a teacher who is motivated toward their education. I could do the job but I am not sure my heart would be in it. The financial is the issue and we are looking at our options and once I have that in place I will know all the angles and can make my decision. Pray for wisdom and guidance for me ladies.

Helen - posted on 02/22/2010

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Hmm, that's such a difficult one! I still struggle with that at times. I find it best to take a step back and look at the whole situation from every angle. Look at your current finances for example, could your family afford for you to stop working now? When a situation is that which God planned for us, I find that everything falls into place. As a trained teacher, how would you feel not having that mental stimulation and challenge of work anymore? And if you then wished to go back to work in a few years time, would that be possible if you hadn't worked for a while? Are there any other options, for example just working a couple of days a week to keep your skills updated. If you aren't happy with your current job, you could perhaps still use your teaching skills again in years to come, if your finances and husband's work are stable, then these could all be signs that being a full-time mum is the right thing to do. Remember that God will want what is best for your and your family - he wouldn't want you to give up work and be miserable or struggle financially. Equally you may find staying at home for the years that your children are young is an incredibly rewarding experience you'll be glad you hadn't missed out on. I can say, as a doctor who is currently a full-time mum and not working, that I absolutely love being a stay-at-home mum and wouldn't change it for the world, but equally I do feel that God blessed me with this education and profession so I shouldn't let my skills lapse completely. I haven't worked for 2 years so far but I plan to start working just a couple of mornings a week from the summertime, if I can find work, so I don't lose my ability to practice and all that I trained for. Keep praying and reading your bible and you will make the right decision, in the end the choice that feels most right to you will be the right one for you and your family. Lots of love x

Christine - posted on 02/21/2010

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No easy solutions. Just think about what you value the most. Todays' sermon spoke of evil as being the internal doubts. The ongoing battle: which way to go. No matter what you chose God will be there by your side. Have faith in Him. He already knows what will happen. May you find some peace.

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