How do you balance being a mom and time with God?

Alyssa - posted on 04/01/2012 ( 20 moms have responded )

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I got married just over a year ago, and my husband and I are expecting our first in May. Since being married I have noticed that it has ben a bit harder to spend time with the Lord (in the word, worshipping, just in my daily activities) because of having more responsibility/more ot think about. And with a baby on the way I'm sure it will become much more difficult. Any suggestions? Anyone been there?

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Fit2BMe - posted on 04/08/2012

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Another thing I would add is that we are called to LOVE, above all things. Yes, God wants to hear from us, and yes God wants us to read his word etc. Our relationship with God is just that, a relationship. You talk to your spouse, you listen to your spouse, you make requests of your spouse and bless your spouse. You learn about your spouse--who they are, their history, what they're passionate about, how they feel loved and how they relate etc. You are committed. So it is with God. He is the ultimate relationship which all other relationships (in theory and ideal) mirror.



I have time each day, sometimes only 5-10 minutes, whereupon husband and I put down the iPhones and iPads, and turn off the tv and spend time together just talking and sharing. So I also have these moments with God. It's not overly formal, it's not about rules and requirements, it's simply born out of relationship. God is a god of Grace. If the day gets away from me, then like my husband, he is able and happy to meet with me on the fly. Out of my own desire and respect, and my own needs, I try to also carve out the more intimate moments sometimes.



When it comes to loving God though, he makes it SO simple. What does e want for and from us? What does God want for his birthday? How does God want to be shown our love? He spells it out plain as can be: the GREATEST of these is LOVE.

What is Love? Love is patient, love kind, love does not envy, love does not boast, love is not proud, love is not rude, love is not self-seeking, love is not easily angered, love keeps no record of wrongs, love does not delight in evil but rejoices in Truth. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Thenhe says further, Whatever you do for the LEAST of my people, you do for me. So loving on other people, in actionable love, is loving on God. And the beauty is, THAT is how you how God to others because God IS love. LOVE is an action, not just a feeling. We have made it into a feeling,overly-romanticizd it, and taken the action right out of it.

When you are loving your husband and child, and "serving" them (showing actionable love) You are loving God. So you see, it's not just about carving out time, it's in all that you do and all that you are. When you are loving YOURSELF (which many) of us moms are guilty of NOT doing, you are loving God.

And if you are feeling condemnation, and are tempted to think its the voice of God, go over that list of what God is (Love) if the voice you fear is God but it is not patient, kind, and sounds angry, rude, calling up former sins, and all the rest, then surely it is not God. It's an easy test. God is a God of Grace. So walk and live in freedom and in love, accepting forgiveness that is freely offered and simply enjoying the beautiful relationship that has been extended to you. :)

PEACE!

Rebekah - posted on 04/02/2012

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Make time. I find it hard to wake up in the morning BEFORE everyone else, especially since sometimes my little one will wake up early or if a slight noise is made he'll wake up - so it was pointless for me to even try to get up before everyone. I do everything at night - personal devotions, making lunches for the next day, cleaning the kitchen, etc.



As for balancing "mom" and time with God - it will be pretty easy for in the beginning, you might not think so, but really it is. Your baby will pretty much "sleep" most of the time and will eventually find a eat/sleep/wake routine. Once that little baby begins to discover crawling and walking and talking, then you're routine will switch again. AND again when becomes a preschooler who is a little more demanding of your time and trying to figure out the world on his/her own, so you're routine will switch up a little again. But the more you get set into a routine now, the easier it will be for adjusting later.



Find the "best" time for you to spend time with God now - is it early morning? afternoon? evening? night time? Then stick with it. You're kid(s) will realize that is "mom" time and will learn to respect it.



I have a 4pm candle lighting in my home - my son knows that is "peace" time. He now walks around with me while I light the candles and will say with me "Thank You God for peace in our home" and then we'll turn on Christian music. He sings and dances, I'll read Scriptures.



Also, when there are times of frustration, anger, or whatever else seems to disrupt the day, I look up Scriptures for peace, love, joy, and read/quote them aloud. I pray aloud too! When I start to feel overwhelmed, I let my son hear me pray to God for help, for strength, etc.



You'll soon find that your time with God while being a mom comes ALL the time throughout the day. Every moment will be a teaching moment for your little one... and your little one will be reading YOU as their first Bible and they will remind you of the things you need to work on DAILY!!! :)



I've also found that I learn LOTS from my son's story books to his movies, etc. Some of the greatest tools are those that are used to teach kids! =)



Embrace this new journey you are about to embark on... I can't tell you it's easy, I can't tell you it's hard... but I can tell you it's a blessing!

Catherine - posted on 04/02/2012

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My honest opinion is get lots of Christian music and play it arund the house while you do "chores".Before you go to bed or even eating or relaxing read a childrens version of the bible out loud ( me and my husband read children bible stories outloud when i was pregnant!) There are lots of ways you can get your baby hooked on the Good Word while he or she is real young. Take them to church activities ( if you have time),Sing songs to them in the car that relate to God. Babies are smarter than what we think they are, before my daughter was born she would kick me if a type of music "she didnt like" was playing...so in the car rides by myself i would listen to gospel music.If you dont have time to really get into reading the Bible you can always listen to it on cds.Even when your child is old enough to have play dates you can make that time into worshiping to having the women you mmeet with at the park talk with you about God and all he has done for you durring the time away frim eachother. I hope this helps may God bless!

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Eileen - posted on 04/15/2012

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I start my day @ 5:00 am on a prayer call. Breast Plate Prayer.org. I find my day is great when I put God first!

Carla - posted on 04/11/2012

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Also, those that don't have time to sit down and read can get Bible on CD. I used to get up at 4:30 to be at work by 6:30. While I was getting my face and hair done, the Bible on Tape (long time ago ;)) was playing. It's not the same as sitting down and actually reading/meditating on what you've just read, but you ARE getting the Word into you, and it makes a huge difference in your day.



The God of the Universe sees our days, and knows we are busy, busy, busy. When we do whatever we can to fit time for Him into our day, He is pleased.



God bless!

Ellen - posted on 04/10/2012

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Being Married is a vow and an important thing in life having a baby is part of this vow. All i can say is take responsibility of raising your child knowing God in your church. Remember church activities in the church can be done as a family. God knows this is new for you and things will adjust well. Just be simple and loving in ur new family an with God. Also having kids I always found driving in my car with windows up and no music I could pray very well its time alone/

Pat - posted on 04/10/2012

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been there, still trying to do that! i try to find ways throughout the normal course of the day to keep Jesus in mind. i do have Christian music playing in the background pretty much around the clock. i also dont have much time(sometimes no drive) to read, so i keep my promise book handy and read a couple of them... being tired makes it difficult and when you have your baby it will get harder in some ways, and in others you may find you have chances to do a little reading or praying when doing those feedings throughout the day and night.. one of my favorite times was rocking the baby and reciting psalm one and singing how great thou art....

Tammy Lynn - posted on 04/10/2012

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I am a mom of 3 wonderful children and yes, being a mom keeps me busy. I also work part time. I make time for God as I schedule time, to sit down and read my Bible and/or pray to Him. Just as you will schedule naps for your baby, you will be so tired, you will want to nap too. Also, I take time throughout the day to talk to God and share what I am feeling. Also, keeping a prayer journal is a great idea. In this, you can keep a book of your prayers to God. It helps with communion with him. I hope this helps and I will pray for you. God bless and congratulations on the upcoming birth of your baby! :)

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I have a 7 month old, and I make time with God when he goes down for his first nap in the morning. Now that he is a little older, he naps for at least an hour, and I use that time to read scripture and pray. When he gets up, we go for a run and sometimes I talk to God while running, but nothing really makes me feel closer to God than to actually sit and have quiet time with him. As a Mom, the hardest thing is not getting caught up in chores or getting things done around the house when he naps. Sure, those things are important, but I am able to get some of that stuff done even when he is awake and playing on his own, or when he is down for his second nap. Spending time with God actually makes me a better Mom and I feel more capable and equipped to get things done. Now, as we contemplate a second child, that may prove to be a little more difficult, but I imagine the routine will just need to be re-adjusted. Have faith and start praying to God now for the strength to stick with your quiet time when the baby arrives. He is listening!

Heather - posted on 04/07/2012

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When I had my first baby, I loved to talk to God while I was nursing my son. I would sit comfortably with some soft music on, in the dark sometimes, and just enjoy the time. It really was a great bonding experience between me, my son, and my Father. As my son got older, it did get harder. Once he started sleeping through the night (finally!), I started getting up in the morning before him, when the house was quiet, and had a cup of coffee and prayed then. You just have to make it a daily priority. There are a lot of good devotionals designed for busy Moms with short but wonderful messages that you can read in 5 minutes. Good luck to you and God bless!

Carla - posted on 04/06/2012

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Hi, Alyssa--you are absolutely correct, things will NEVER be the same after your child is born! It is the most wonderful roller coaster ride you will ever take ;)



Fit2Bme is showing us what Paul said 'be instant in season and out of season'. Talking with the Lord throughout your day shows Him you are eager to be close with him, kinda like talking and texting your husband throughout the day. My daughter and her husband of 10 years talk/text each other probably a dozen times a day! If we want to talk to our spouse that much, we should be talking at LEAST that much to the One who made us, saved us and keeps us!



Another thing I would mention is keeping Christian music on in the background all day long. My daughter-in-law with 2 wild girls always has the music on in the background. At first, when I heard it amidst all the confusion, I thought 'how can she stand this?' After a few minutes, I could hear how it keeps your spirit calm, even with chaos going on.



God bless, darling, you will be an awesome mother! Happy Easter!

Angela - posted on 04/05/2012

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I think Fit2BMe Fit2BMe has answered very well here. You simply have to grab your moments whilst still living your life. God's always ready to listen!

Fit2BMe - posted on 04/03/2012

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In my experience, this time with God changes, but doesn't lessen.

Within the context of marriage, you can do devotions with your husband, have daily conversations about your spirituality/faith and how it played out that day, pray together, read a book together, attend bible study together etc. AND carve out your own bit of time in the evening, or whevever, where you do whatever it is that you like to do.



For myself, I'm not so much a "sit down and pray or study" girl, as I am someone who has a running dialogue with God throughout the day, and as things come to mind I look them up in my bible which I keep in my car or bag. When something is really heavy on my heart, I go into my closet and talk to God there.



Since having my son, I find I've actually just brought him into that routine with me. He hears me talk out loud to God all the time as I go about my day. Each time he gets hurt I scoop him up and while I'm comforting him I pray for him. I pray out loud over him as part of our night time routine, and in the car we listen to Steve Green's "Hide em in your heart" CD's which sing scripture memory verses etc. so rather than set moments, it's an ongoing thing. What I see happening is that my son, who is turning 3, has picked up on these habits. He loves to pray and sing, and talks to Jesus like he were physically in the room as I were.



I think kids, for me anyway, have a way of enhancing your relationship with God. You get a unique perspective on the unconditional love of a parent and how much more God feels that for us, as well as so many other parallels. And hearing faith through your child's little mouth is just humbling as can be.



The key is to LIVE it. Don't wait for an hour to carve out of your time because that hour may never come. Just LIVE it out. :)

Ellen - posted on 04/03/2012

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Well u did take a vow an that is important an God wants u to be a good mom. Well after u have ur baby u will have a very big change in ur life and emotions are their, Please remember God know this. Get ur self adjusted to ur new life God understands an prayer after u get on a routeen, when u feel u have time. The best time is when ur child is takeing a nap. Or if ur working an drive to work pray in ur car their is nothing to bother u turn off ur radio. Anytime u have to be alone.

Alyssa - posted on 04/02/2012

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It could take me a pretty long time and a lot of words to reply individually to each of you. So I won't haha. But thank you for taking the time to give me some advice. I'll definitely take it to God and really see which ways He wants me to use, and really let the Holy Spirit guide me as to when I should set aside more time and when to incorporate Him into my daily activities.



Right now I am used to being able to set aside large amounts of time to worship and reading the word, and I was just a little concerned about how that would change once the baby arrives, because I know it obviously won't be the same.

Victoria - posted on 04/02/2012

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Congrats on being newly wed & expecting.



You actually have to make time for God. It great to listen to worship music or even a recorded Bible while you do other things, but you actually need to set time apart for spending in personal fellowship with God & his word daily. It takes sometime to get into it, but then sometimes God will wake you up in the middle of the night come & have fellowship with him or in the early hours of the morning while everyone is still sleeping, even when you want to watch your favourite show he'll say "come meet with me in my word, so I can draw you closer to me".



It's not easy, but with the help of the Holy Spirit it can be done. Take it from a Mum of Three who works full time & is also a Pastor along with my husband. As the scripture says: With God all things are possible. It might take us persevering & proving our faith genuine, and then after a while it will get easier, and more & more enjoyable, that when you're sick or unable to have that time for any reason, you will feel like you missed out.



Blessings Pastor Victoria MacPherson

Catherine - posted on 04/02/2012

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No problem when i was growing up my mom bought me and my twin a bunch of kids worship cds and we always played them it made chores fun. During storms we would grab a Bible ( each of a different kind such as King Jamed, New living translation, childrens version...)choose a verse and each took turns reading what the verse read to see how different the were! Doing that made it seem like the storm passed faster! Anyway just thought you mihht try that when your young one is old enough to read! Glad i could help!

Sarah - posted on 04/02/2012

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I totally understand. Because my husband and I are so different, trying to merge our habits and personalities made it hard for me to stick to my long-time early-morning devo routine. I never really got into a comfortable routine (I do better with routine) before I had David a little over a year later. I have a really hard time concentrating on reading the Word when David is up or my husband is busy around me. David is six months old already, and I still need to figure out how I can make some kind of routine stick. But one thing I've been trying to keep in mind, that even though I only do "formal" devos a few times a week right now, that doesn't mean I can't spend time with my Lord every day. Praying during a few quiet moments, or during chores, or talking to God about my day as I get ready for bed are all spending precious time with Him. Also, I really like Catherine's idea of have Christian music on, and I've even heard of getting the Bible on cd and having it play in the background. I really like that idea and want to do it myself. Also, putting Scripture verses on index cards around the house or on the fridge so getting the Word in is easier. And I haven't done this yet, but I want to try taking some of those index cards with me when I take David for walks and use that time to try to memorize them.



Bottom line, be creative and give yourself grace! God knows your heart and is not limited to our imaginations. Maybe ask Him to show you how and where to spend special time with Him and see what He comes up with. :)

Alyssa - posted on 04/02/2012

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Rebekah- thank you. Very helpful. I had been praying for a few days about the qualms I was having over myabe not having "as much time" as I used to. But God really showed me that it wasn't necessarily not as much time, as it would be time spent differently, focusing on Him in different ways than when I was single and before I was a mom. What you said actually is really good confirmation of that for me, and really helpful for the "how". Again thanks!



Catherine- Yeah I have a lot of Christian music, and it makes chores a lot better to be able to worship god while doing them. All the other ideas you mentioned are great! Thanks!

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