Losing the Meaning of Sex

Carla - posted on 09/12/2012

@Mike--I assume because you are going through our old posts looking for anything related to sex and posting comments that sex DOES mean something to you. To us who have given our lives to Jesus, sex takes on a whole new meaning. It is a beautiful glue to keep MARRIED couples in a loving relationship.



I am closing down this thread, and I am asking you to retrain from going through topics meant for Christian women. I pray the Holy Spirit speak to you as you read this. I pray His love reach out to you and you accept this beautiful gift. I further pray that you WILL be posting again, but THIS time, you will be giving us Godly advice, from one who has been converted in love, by God.



Carla Allaire

Co-Moderator Christian Mommies

Theresa - posted on 01/16/2010

I think it all comes down to parents. Parents are the ones that lay the foundation for their kids. I grew up in a family that didn't talk about sex because it was dirty. As a kid with no information about it. It makes you curious and therefore you make bad decisions. Sex is to casual it is not taught or believed to be a beautiful thing between a husband and wife anymore.

Sativa - posted on 01/02/2010

I can only tell you my story. I was 15 when i lost my virginity. I grew up in a very abusive home and only wanted to be held, loved, trusted, and wanted. The boy I was with was also a virgin so it was a step we took together. I was with him for 2 years, and to this day in my heart, I still carry love for him and the peace he gave me. However after he left me at the end of the 2 years I was lost and broken. I had no one to turn to so I "went wild." I ended up with my first baby at 17. I cant say why all teens do it but I can say that I'm sure alot of them are lost and alone. They only want to be loved for who they are and that makes them easy targets for other teens who feel the same way, but are more predatory. I can honestly say that after meeting a few predators on my own, I vowed never to be the victim again and I became the predator. I am now happily married and the Lord has seen fit to get my attention and move into my life. I realize the mistakes I made and have asked Jesus to forgive me for hurting as many as I did. It would be impossible for me to locate each individual to ask them for forgiveness, so I ask the Lord. I hope I was able to shed some light on your question. I am always willing to talk to the younger generations about these things and I try to counsel them in my own way to do what is right in their hearts, and not what their boyfriend / girlfriends says is right.

Darcel - posted on 01/01/2010

Sexual abuse and rape of children is a crime of the body and the mind. It ruins a child's innocence and without proper adult support and guidence a young man or woman can develop unhealthy sexual behavior. - Speaking from experience I can understand the emotions and pain of rape that result in promiscuity. It has hard to find a healthy emotional/spiritual response to sex when you are abused.

Although I do not use my history of abuse it as an excuse to justify my actions (anymore), I do pray that other young people of both sexes can get the support and help they need to heal so they will not make my mistakes.

Heather - posted on 01/01/2010

Quoting sheryl:

Thank you for posting this topic.
If we stop and think about it alittle we will find that alot of girls an even boys loose their virginity not by their own choice but through rape and molestation.
I was raped when i was 12 and was so scared. I had no idea what was going on an had alot of questions going through my head at the time- Is this normal? is this just what families do? Why is this happening to me?? it hurts so much :-(
After many sleepless nights and nightmares i told my mother and then went through hell an back while my mother told many people and turned it into her problem.
A couple of years later i was involved in a youth group and enjoyed it but didnt connect with people very well. The youth leader at the time noticed this and spoke to me about helping work through my low self confidence and non self worth. It accured to me after wards the he had a plan and was finding my soft spot. He procceeded to rap me and it was an ongoing thing as he threatened to get a gang onto me if i told anyone. ( what youth leader could do such a thing). I meet a guy and became sexually active couse i got it in my head that that's just what i needed to do to keep this guy couse he told me he loved me. I still kept the abuse from the youth leader a secret becouse i was afraid. I ended up pregnant and went though suicidal thoughts many times. I didnt beleive in abortions and kept the baby although i went through my entire pregnancy not knowing how i was going to cope when the baby was born couse i didnt know if it was my boy friend at the times baby or a result of rape. our realation ship came to and end when i confided in him about the rape and he didnt want the responsibility of being a young dad. I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl and she is a spitting image of my boy friend at the time of the rape so i was releived that i didnt have to look at her and be reminded of the abuse i endured. 14 yrs have passed and she is the light of my life but i still carry the pain of what i went through. i find it hard to connect well with my husband of 10yrs becouse of my past. but i know that god is helping me heal in time. I do not have alot of trust in male youth leaders or anyone really but i know i need to put my past aside and not let it get in the way of parenting my children. i feel i am to protective at times but its just couse i dont want them to go through what i went through. How do you move on ??

I know it's hard, but you have to ask God to help you forgive. It's the only way. I was sexually abused as a child (by my step-father), and had a hard time in relationships until God helpped me forgive him. I never thought it was possible, and without God it wouldn't have been. But now I have a wonderful relationship with my husband.

Heather - posted on 01/01/2010

Quoting sheryl:

Thank you for posting this topic.
If we stop and think about it alittle we will find that alot of girls an even boys loose their virginity not by their own choice but through rape and molestation.
I was raped when i was 12 and was so scared. I had no idea what was going on an had alot of questions going through my head at the time- Is this normal? is this just what families do? Why is this happening to me?? it hurts so much :-(
After many sleepless nights and nightmares i told my mother and then went through hell an back while my mother told many people and turned it into her problem.
A couple of years later i was involved in a youth group and enjoyed it but didnt connect with people very well. The youth leader at the time noticed this and spoke to me about helping work through my low self confidence and non self worth. It accured to me after wards the he had a plan and was finding my soft spot. He procceeded to rap me and it was an ongoing thing as he threatened to get a gang onto me if i told anyone. ( what youth leader could do such a thing). I meet a guy and became sexually active couse i got it in my head that that's just what i needed to do to keep this guy couse he told me he loved me. I still kept the abuse from the youth leader a secret becouse i was afraid. I ended up pregnant and went though suicidal thoughts many times. I didnt beleive in abortions and kept the baby although i went through my entire pregnancy not knowing how i was going to cope when the baby was born couse i didnt know if it was my boy friend at the times baby or a result of rape. our realation ship came to and end when i confided in him about the rape and he didnt want the responsibility of being a young dad. I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl and she is a spitting image of my boy friend at the time of the rape so i was releived that i didnt have to look at her and be reminded of the abuse i endured. 14 yrs have passed and she is the light of my life but i still carry the pain of what i went through. i find it hard to connect well with my husband of 10yrs becouse of my past. but i know that god is helping me heal in time. I do not have alot of trust in male youth leaders or anyone really but i know i need to put my past aside and not let it get in the way of parenting my children. i feel i am to protective at times but its just couse i dont want them to go through what i went through. How do you move on ??

I know it's hard, but you have to ask God to help you forgive. It's the only way. I was sexually abused as a child (by my step-father), and had a hard time in relationships until God helpped me forgive him. I never thought it was possible, and without God it wouldn't have been. But now I have a wonderful relationship with my husband.

Sheryl - posted on 01/01/2010

Quoting sheryl:

Thank you for posting this topic.
If we stop and think about it alittle we will find that alot of girls an even boys loose their virginity not by their own choice but through rape and molestation.
I was raped when i was 12 and was so scared. I had no idea what was going on an had alot of questions going through my head at the time- Is this normal? is this just what families do? Why is this happening to me?? it hurts so much :-(
After many sleepless nights and nightmares i told my mother and then went through hell an back while my mother told many people and turned it into her problem.
A couple of years later i was involved in a youth group and enjoyed it but didnt connect with people very well. The youth leader at the time noticed this and spoke to me about helping work through my low self confidence and non self worth. It accured to me after wards the he had a plan and was finding my soft spot. He procceeded to rap me and it was an ongoing thing as he threatened to get a gang onto me if i told anyone. ( what youth leader could do such a thing). I meet a guy and became sexually active couse i got it in my head that that's just what i needed to do to keep this guy couse he told me he loved me. I still kept the abuse from the youth leader a secret becouse i was afraid. I ended up pregnant and went though suicidal thoughts many times. I didnt beleive in abortions and kept the baby although i went through my entire pregnancy not knowing how i was going to cope when the baby was born couse i didnt know if it was my boy friend at the times baby or a result of rape. our realation ship came to and end when i confided in him about the rape and he didnt want the responsibility of being a young dad. I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl and she is a spitting image of my boy friend at the time of the rape so i was releived that i didnt have to look at her and be reminded of the abuse i endured. 14 yrs have passed and she is the light of my life but i still carry the pain of what i went through. i find it hard to connect well with my husband of 10yrs becouse of my past. but i know that god is helping me heal in time. I do not have alot of trust in male youth leaders or anyone really but i know i need to put my past aside and not let it get in the way of parenting my children. i feel i am to protective at times but its just couse i dont want them to go through what i went through. How do you move on ??

i'm glad someone agrees with me! my world is much more worse than what it was years and years ago. i think parent have it harder these days. plus, more and more family talk less. so that trust may not be there in family. which is sad. that why i think more kids are having kids. low self worth and scared.  plus, they sell sex appel on tv. so they see sex everywhere. so some think it ok. but that just my view! 

Sheryl - posted on 12/30/2009

Thank you for posting this topic.

If we stop and think about it alittle we will find that alot of girls an even boys loose their virginity not by their own choice but through rape and molestation.

I was raped when i was 12 and was so scared. I had no idea what was going on an had alot of questions going through my head at the time- Is this normal? is this just what families do? Why is this happening to me?? it hurts so much :-(

After many sleepless nights and nightmares i told my mother and then went through hell an back while my mother told many people and turned it into her problem.

A couple of years later i was involved in a youth group and enjoyed it but didnt connect with people very well. The youth leader at the time noticed this and spoke to me about helping work through my low self confidence and non self worth. It accured to me after wards the he had a plan and was finding my soft spot. He procceeded to rap me and it was an ongoing thing as he threatened to get a gang onto me if i told anyone. ( what youth leader could do such a thing). I meet a guy and became sexually active couse i got it in my head that that's just what i needed to do to keep this guy couse he told me he loved me. I still kept the abuse from the youth leader a secret becouse i was afraid. I ended up pregnant and went though suicidal thoughts many times. I didnt beleive in abortions and kept the baby although i went through my entire pregnancy not knowing how i was going to cope when the baby was born couse i didnt know if it was my boy friend at the times baby or a result of rape. our realation ship came to and end when i confided in him about the rape and he didnt want the responsibility of being a young dad. I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl and she is a spitting image of my boy friend at the time of the rape so i was releived that i didnt have to look at her and be reminded of the abuse i endured. 14 yrs have passed and she is the light of my life but i still carry the pain of what i went through. i find it hard to connect well with my husband of 10yrs becouse of my past. but i know that god is helping me heal in time. I do not have alot of trust in male youth leaders or anyone really but i know i need to put my past aside and not let it get in the way of parenting my children. i feel i am to protective at times but its just couse i dont want them to go through what i went through. How do you move on ??

Lena - posted on 12/30/2009

Quoting Celicia:

 That is the number one thing I hear today "I want to be financially stable before marrying, even though we are living together..." or whatever the scenario, but that time may never come. I have been married for four years now and my hubby and I are just now becoming stable and it's a long road.

That is so true. For those of you who are waiting for that financial stability to move on with your life, probably won't for a while. You never know what is in the future, who knows, maybe both of you will be jobless. Something will constantly come up and make you  put it off. So it is important to just take the steps and do it now. 

Lena - posted on 12/30/2009

Couple that with parents who choose to protect their children from the destructive influences of media that seek to propagandize our children through hidden (and sometimes not-so hidden) messages of teen sexuality, I believe that these elements can prove to protect our children despite the moral cesspool we live in. It would behoove all Christians to take stock of what we allow to be broadcast in our homes and ask ourselves whether or not these themes ought to be influencing our families - because, believe it or not, after a while what we see and hear begins to shape our belief systems - and while we may be adults and have the ability to discern between good and evil, our children are not and they easily pick up on the fact that mom and dad say one thing, but passively support something else by allowing these messages to constantly be depicted on the films and shows they choose to entertain themselves with.

JMHO.

Well said :)

Sheryl - posted on 12/30/2009

i had sex when i was 18 but before i me chooseing to i was almost rapped luckly some he just stop! i thank god for that! after that happen i just lost all self worth of my self! i think that way some people do some of the act they do. i felt like no man seen me as a person they just seen me as a pieace of meat! so i have sex have that happen with two men before i mate my know husbend! i know i was wrong for what i did. but i was running from the issue at hand! i think a lot of people do. they do want to face there choice's. now these days they are more poeple who are being rap or molested. i think that a big part of it. i think they may have seen thing like i did about are self worth! i am just thankful that i found my husbend cause i feel i was able to find the lord through finding my husbend. this is just how i feel about the subject. i mean just think if you ask a teen have you ever been rap or molested. i bet more than have may say yes! i mean i have a friend who was and she never had sex before that. then after she started have sex all the time. know she regest it. but she also found that she not a pieace of meat. i also think some of the problem is that they don't let god in the school know! i live in a place many family are of faith. they call it the bible belt. and they still don't let god in to the schools. unless you send them to the priavite school! but that just my view on this! the other day i was at my sons school and a lil boy started to say a pray. i thought it was great. all i could do was smile!

Marley - posted on 12/30/2009

Quoting Celicia:

Oh, I'm so glad this post was put up. I hate that our society is all about sex and that people are so accepting too watch things on television, movies, or listen to music that portrays sex as harmless. I'm not perfect, I am a sinner. Just before middle school I was molested and felt I could never confide in my parents and felt they would think I was lying. So, in high school I got WAY too involved with someone who ended up by using me, forcing me, and then leaving me. Again, I felt so alone, I just turned to other people and was then used but didn't have actual sex with any of them. Finally, I met the man of my dreams when I was 17. I loved him with all my heart and from the first conversation with him on the phone, I knew I would marry him. I ended up by living with him when I got kicked out and definitely was not faithful to being pure before marriage. That is my biggest regret, to this day. I justified it by saying that I was going to marry him one day and that we were meant to be, and then eventually I was pregnant and we lost our beautiful daughter when I went into premature labor. We still married and I know I am forgiven for what I have done, but I will never be able to change any of it and I regret that we live in a society that justifies sex and that I allowed myself to believe that lie. I really wish I had parents like some of you when I was growing up. Maybe if I had parents that sex was so sacred and wonderful instead of making it sound like a "dirty word" then I wouldn't have been so easily manipulated and I wouldn't have ended up in the situations that I had.

Also, Marley, I know you will probably not like that I say this (I know I wouldn't have if I was in your position) but you need to not put off getting married. You already made you marriage bed and have a beautiful baby with this man, so don't wait for financial stability. That is the number one thing I hear today "I want to be financially stable before marrying, even though we are living together..." or whatever the scenario, but that time may never come. I have been married for four years now and my hubby and I are just now becoming stable and it's a long road. It's hard, but knowingly being with this person out of wedlock when you know it is wrong, is an intentional sin. I promise I'm not trying to attack you, it's just that it only takes thirty minutes at a justice of the peace to make a covenant to show God that you hear His word. You are married in your heart, so no take the step to be officially married to protect yourself from sinning. Oh, and a wonderful book that I wish I had found YEARS ago for biblical financial answers is "Your Money Map," by Howard Dayton. It was a big eye-opener with me seeing as it pointed out that Jesus spoke about money more than any other subject in the new testament. That just goes to show how important it is to handle your finances correctly. And this also helps no matter what income level you are at, and I mean that, b/c my hubby and I are at the lower end of the scale since I had to leave work and we will hit the first of the seven goals in less than two months. God bless, and I hope this is helpful.

I do not feel attacked at all, there are just several reasons as to why I am not going to get married just yet. I want to be financially stable because I want a beautiful, large wedding. I do not want to get married in thirty minutes.. I am Catholic and plan on being married in the Catholic Church. My parents are also helping pay for college if I wait to get married. Right now, we have more important things to pay for.

Rabecca - posted on 12/29/2009

Quoting Heather:

Teresa, I just want you to know that I have been there. God heals, and provides. When my husband left me for a younger woman, I said the exact same thing. I was left with two young boys to raise. But God heals, and God provides. I now have a wonderful husband and beautiful twin girls through him. He is a great father to all four of our kids. God is good.

God does indeed provide and I can tell you I felt like I could never love or trust another man again when my ex left me 7 months pregant with my son I was scared alone and very p'd off I was even mad at God I felt he let me down and it took me 4 years to get over that hurt and say okay God I done I am broken fix me because I cannot walk one more min in my shoes and really at my lowest point he picked me up dusted me off and said finally I was waiting for you to ask and the strangest thing happend I met this guy in a fast food drive through and was blown away by this feeling of this is the man you God intendend for my life and it was instant and felt this awsome feeling of I could have waited if only I knew this is what I was missing but I had to let my voice interfer and my wants and had to be broken down so God could show me what he wanted for me and he showed me that men can be honest and protective and treat you with honor and respect and he loves my son as his own and really shows him the true meaning or father and what it means to be a man and that true pride comes from doing the right thing and giving to those you love before you think of yourself God truly heals he still makes miricles happen everyday sometimes you just have to ask for one

Celicia - posted on 12/29/2009

Oh, I'm so glad this post was put up. I hate that our society is all about sex and that people are so accepting too watch things on television, movies, or listen to music that portrays sex as harmless. I'm not perfect, I am a sinner. Just before middle school I was molested and felt I could never confide in my parents and felt they would think I was lying. So, in high school I got WAY too involved with someone who ended up by using me, forcing me, and then leaving me. Again, I felt so alone, I just turned to other people and was then used but didn't have actual sex with any of them. Finally, I met the man of my dreams when I was 17. I loved him with all my heart and from the first conversation with him on the phone, I knew I would marry him. I ended up by living with him when I got kicked out and definitely was not faithful to being pure before marriage. That is my biggest regret, to this day. I justified it by saying that I was going to marry him one day and that we were meant to be, and then eventually I was pregnant and we lost our beautiful daughter when I went into premature labor. We still married and I know I am forgiven for what I have done, but I will never be able to change any of it and I regret that we live in a society that justifies sex and that I allowed myself to believe that lie. I really wish I had parents like some of you when I was growing up. Maybe if I had parents that sex was so sacred and wonderful instead of making it sound like a "dirty word" then I wouldn't have been so easily manipulated and I wouldn't have ended up in the situations that I had.

Also, Marley, I know you will probably not like that I say this (I know I wouldn't have if I was in your position) but you need to not put off getting married. You already made you marriage bed and have a beautiful baby with this man, so don't wait for financial stability. That is the number one thing I hear today "I want to be financially stable before marrying, even though we are living together..." or whatever the scenario, but that time may never come. I have been married for four years now and my hubby and I are just now becoming stable and it's a long road. It's hard, but knowingly being with this person out of wedlock when you know it is wrong, is an intentional sin. I promise I'm not trying to attack you, it's just that it only takes thirty minutes at a justice of the peace to make a covenant to show God that you hear His word. You are married in your heart, so no take the step to be officially married to protect yourself from sinning. Oh, and a wonderful book that I wish I had found YEARS ago for biblical financial answers is "Your Money Map," by Howard Dayton. It was a big eye-opener with me seeing as it pointed out that Jesus spoke about money more than any other subject in the new testament. That just goes to show how important it is to handle your finances correctly. And this also helps no matter what income level you are at, and I mean that, b/c my hubby and I are at the lower end of the scale since I had to leave work and we will hit the first of the seven goals in less than two months. God bless, and I hope this is helpful.

Rosilind - posted on 12/25/2009

I think one of the saddest things in this whole scenario is that children are exposed to sexuality from a very young age. Be that cartoons that show girls with cleavege and other very revealing garments; talking about boyfriends, kissing, ect (in cartoons depicting teen-aged girls); movies intended for children that include some adult themes; etc. Not to mention the adult movies children are allowed to watch or teen-aged entertainers who are immoral and yet appeal to children and young teens.



It seems that there just isn't any idea of innocence anymore! I am horrified at some of the new cartoons these days that are filled with adult themes, innuendo, and mild swearing. Such cartoons are NOT for children and rob them of their innocence way too early.



In fact, children talk about sex and sexual things at such young ages these days that it is apalling. When they should be talking about cars, dolls, or other child-like things...their heads are filled with the garbage they have been fed through the media.



Moving on then to Jr. High and High School when they have been conditioned to think that sexuality is normal, they endure pressure from peers, boyfriends/girlfriends, teen magazines that tell them it is okay and normal to have sex at their age. Teen-aged sitcoms portray it as normal (One Tree Hill, The OC, etc) as well as movies aimed at pre-teens and teens.



The fact is that children have been propaganized from a young age that it is normal to have sex as a teen. Its no wonder then with our society so drenched in promiscuity and bombarded with sexual themes that the whole idea of sex and what it was intended to be has completely lost its meaning.



That said, I married at 34 (my husband 32) we were both virgins. I grew up in a Christian home and while I did some things I am not exactly proud of there was always that boundary line I never crossed. Today, when I counsel young people, I tell them that it is prudent to save AS MUCH for marriage as possible. Even the first kiss. Why do all that stuff before marriage - its not necessary and is often so tempting that young people find themselves so overwhelmed with passion that they simply give in.



By the time my husband and I had met we had been in several relationships, some of which were far too physical. We both sat down and outlined our physical boundaries - leaving open the idea that if something felt "too good" we would tell the other person that it would be best to save that for later. In the end, we had a fairly hands-off relationship that kept us undistracted and able to get to know each other on deeper levels - and made our honeymoon a lot of fun!!!



I am now pregnant with #1, you can bet that my son's TV viewing habits from a young age will be very monitored and we will be frank with him about what the Bible says about premarital sex and why. That goes for ANY kind of sex. One commenter mentioned that it is not enough to tell them "Jesus said so"...and that is true, just like it is never enough to tell your kids, "Because I said so". We must follow up with that by telling them WHY Jesus said so, why it is emotionally painful, why premarital sex and co-habitation very often leads to divorce, and that it has led to massive numbers of teens with sexually transmitted diseases. We must teach our children to stand alone despite pressure and help them develop good character, a strong sense of self-worth, and an assurance that while their peers may reject them they have a family that supports them and loves them unconditionally; not to mention the fact that children must know that God is always watching (and not in a negative sense, but in a protective sense) and that His favor is of the utmost importance.



Couple that with parents who choose to protect their children from the destructive influences of media that seek to propagandize our children through hidden (and sometimes not-so hidden) messages of teen sexuality, I believe that these elements can prove to protect our children despite the moral cesspool we live in. It would behoove all Christians to take stock of what we allow to be broadcast in our homes and ask ourselves whether or not these themes ought to be influencing our families - because, believe it or not, after a while what we see and hear begins to shape our belief systems - and while we may be adults and have the ability to discern between good and evil, our children are not and they easily pick up on the fact that mom and dad say one thing, but passively support something else by allowing these messages to constantly be depicted on the films and shows they choose to entertain themselves with.



JMHO.

Darcel - posted on 12/24/2009

Quoting Lena:

... And when it is time to get married and they find that special someone, they have nothing give... What are you teaching your kids about sex? Does it mean anything anymore?

Have NOTHING to give? I disagree that all I had to give my my new husband was my virginity. But I do understand your point.  

Here is my question for others to think about:

What is your preference:  to have a 16 year old daughter who had sex and got pregnant by her boyfriend of two years (only lover) and doesn't want to get married, or have a daughter who is a 16 year old virgin (never had sexual intercourse) and wears her purity ring, but has given oral sex to the entire offensive line of her high school football team (true story I'll explain in another post) and happily drops to her knees for any boy who calls her pretty?    

I know most people will say " I don't want either choice" but for purposes of this arguement you have to make a choice. Go on...

I'll wait....

When given the choice of both horrible options most people chose the first choice, because at least this young lady was in what she considered to be a committed relationship. In this case, the "meaning of sex" over-rules the fact that the school harlot is technically a virgin.

I use this example all the time when opening up the discussion with teenage girls when I explain the why waiting for sex is important.  In my experience talking with teens I can tell you that teens do understand that  all sex acts should be in a committed adult relationship.

The problem is explaining why they should wait to have sex until they get married.  Depending on religous upbringing young girls do not always understand why they must wait for marriage ("Jesus said so" is not a convincing answer).  Also young girls do not always understand why they are not adult/mature enough to participate in sexual activity while in high school.

Classic excuses "he'll dump me" and "everyone is doing it" usually are not the ones I hear. I hear, "BUT I AM OLD/MATURE ENOUGH TO HANDLE THE RESPONSIBILITY" or "I AM READY TO HAVE SEX".

And that problem I do not know how to fix. How do you convince a young teen that they are not emotionally mature enough for sex?

Lena - posted on 12/24/2009

Quoting Marley:

Quoting Lena:

Quoting Marley:

This is a very touchy subject for everyone but I can add to it from personal experience. I am a 17-year-old mother right now. My son is a little over 5 months old and I am still with his father and plan on getting married to him after we are both finished with college and are financially set with good jobs. I have always had a strong relationship with God and before high school had planned on waiting until I was married to have sex. I then met a boy my freshman year who forced me to have sex and then left.. I then had a mind-set that sex meant nothing because it was taken away from me. But after I met the guy I am with now, I realized that sex is sacred and of course, I wish I were still a virgin but that's life.. and I love my son more than anything in the world and wouldn't change anything. It's just how things work out and it does not make me less of a person or have less of a relationship with God. It all depends on the person.

I understand people make mistakes about it.. But the people who don't account for their actions and put no meaning to sex and do it as something casual just bothers me. 

I agree. I'm not one to put no meaning to sex and I don't agree with casual sex. It's to share with one person and that's what I'm doing with the rest of my life.. one person.

:)

Marley - posted on 12/23/2009

Quoting Lena:

Quoting Marley:

This is a very touchy subject for everyone but I can add to it from personal experience. I am a 17-year-old mother right now. My son is a little over 5 months old and I am still with his father and plan on getting married to him after we are both finished with college and are financially set with good jobs. I have always had a strong relationship with God and before high school had planned on waiting until I was married to have sex. I then met a boy my freshman year who forced me to have sex and then left.. I then had a mind-set that sex meant nothing because it was taken away from me. But after I met the guy I am with now, I realized that sex is sacred and of course, I wish I were still a virgin but that's life.. and I love my son more than anything in the world and wouldn't change anything. It's just how things work out and it does not make me less of a person or have less of a relationship with God. It all depends on the person.

I understand people make mistakes about it.. But the people who don't account for their actions and put no meaning to sex and do it as something casual just bothers me. 

I agree. I'm not one to put no meaning to sex and I don't agree with casual sex. It's to share with one person and that's what I'm doing with the rest of my life.. one person.

Lena - posted on 12/22/2009

Quoting Teresa:

I've only ever been w/ one man. Regrettably we started having sex before marriage (early 20's). I felt so guilty, but found ways to try and justify my actions.... That failed, but I AM forgiven. :)

Same man left me almost 2 years ago now because of, in his words, my lack of cooking, cleaning, and sex which were apparently my only 'wifely' duties... to say nothing of the love, commitment, support, and friendship that I DID provide!! My lawyer got a 'kick' out of that one. @@

Anyway, I have twin 8 year old daughters right now and I am TERRIFIED that they are going to end up pregnant as teens (or younger) because they may go looking for the 'love' and relationship that their father doesn't provide them with.... As their mother, I do the best that I can to raise them in a loving, Christian home and continue trying to provide them w/ positive, loving, male role models, but I fear it won't be enough. :(

On another personal side note though... Unless a miracle happens between my ex and I, I can almost guarantee (99.9%) that I will never have sex again. I will NOT have sex outside of marriage again and I don't see myself attempting to trust another man enough to marry him.

Keep your head up, God won't leave you and your girls. I am 100% sure you will the greatest husband and role model for your two girls :) 

Lena - posted on 12/22/2009

Quoting Marley:

This is a very touchy subject for everyone but I can add to it from personal experience. I am a 17-year-old mother right now. My son is a little over 5 months old and I am still with his father and plan on getting married to him after we are both finished with college and are financially set with good jobs. I have always had a strong relationship with God and before high school had planned on waiting until I was married to have sex. I then met a boy my freshman year who forced me to have sex and then left.. I then had a mind-set that sex meant nothing because it was taken away from me. But after I met the guy I am with now, I realized that sex is sacred and of course, I wish I were still a virgin but that's life.. and I love my son more than anything in the world and wouldn't change anything. It's just how things work out and it does not make me less of a person or have less of a relationship with God. It all depends on the person.

I understand people make mistakes about it.. But the people who don't account for their actions and put no meaning to sex and do it as something casual just bothers me. 

Lena - posted on 12/22/2009

Quoting Elizabeth:

I think that the world in general puts a huge emphasis on sex. They make it sound like a glamorous game. When people are bombarded with sexual images and comments, it becomes normal. It makes them believe that it is not that big of a deal. Also, I think that girls in particular are being pressured to be a certain way just because men want them to be that way. They are insecure because they don't have the perfect body. But who does? Most celebrities are airbrushed or have plastic surgery. Very few have natural bodies that look like that. So, young girls feel like they have to be perfect to get any guy to date them. Then, once they start dating a guy, they feel pressured to have sex due to the media and the fact that the media has told boys that it is ok to expect sex out of a girl. The media tells us that if a girl doesn't have sex, she is not a person that others will want to be friends with and even in the future won't have friends or boyfriends. And I have realized that these feelings and thoughts can also be true for young Christian girls. Although I think it is less likely to act upon these ideas, it does happen. Girls are just SO insecure these days. I admit that I have struggled with body issues even being married to a man that tells me I'm the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, has never cheated on me, and even liked my body during and after my pregnancy.

I completely agree that if a girl thinks she's mature enough to have sex, then she should be mature enough to make a commitment to that person, but remember that are two people who decided to have sex. Just because we don't physically see that a male is expecting a child, doesn't mean that it is ok for him to not make a commitment. In addition, I believe that it is better for a couple to have a child out of wedlock and not get married if they are not sure if it can work than for them to get married and end up divorced. Obviously, in a perfect world, the marriage would last, and they would eventually get over their differences, but that is not at all how the real world is. Having a child at a young age is much more stressful often due to immaturity, inability to financially support a child, and having to make sacrifices such as putting off schooling.

My mom had a baby girl out of wedlock when she was about 24. Her self esteem was so low, that she thought that if she were pregnant then people would know that someone wanted her. Later on, she realized that she was too immature and would be unable to properly provide for the child, so she gave her baby up for adoption. Her situation with the baby's father was not one that would teach the child what a healthy relationship looks like. Also, I have friends who have told me that they got married because they had a child together when they were 17. The husband does not take any responsibility when it comes to their children and obviously has no desire to be married since he often is out until early in the morning and is not faithful to his wife. The wife ended up dropping out of school, because she was at school so much that her daughter would cry for her sister who watched her during the day. I believe that their relationship is not at all a healthy one to raise a child in. They were pressured to get married by the husband's parents, and both do not believe that their relationship will last. I also know a girl who had a baby in high school and decided that she did not think that marrying her baby's father was the best choice for her or her son at the moment. She could not guarantee at that time that their marriage would last. Four years later, they are still together, and I think it is very likely that they will one day be married. Some people are not meant to be together. Yes, sometimes people make the wrong choices of having sex together before marriage, but that doesn't mean that they will be able to make it being married (which they should've thought about in first place). Both people have to want to be married and put all of their effort into it for a marriage to last.

Also, I hate that people (often Christians) look down on young girls who get pregnant out of wedlock. Just because we can see the evidence of her sin where ever she goes, doesn't mean it is at all ok to think less of her. Everyone sins. Sex out of wedlock is just one that has extreme consequences. I actually smile and pray a blessing for women who are pregnant no matter their age, because they are choosing life.

To reply something you have said, about Christians looking down on girls who do get pregnant out of wedlock, I personally never do. I think pregnancy is a beautiful thing, I just don't support the girls doing it for not so great reasons, that are neither good for the mother or the child. 

Heather - posted on 12/22/2009

Teresa, I just want you to know that I have been there. God heals, and provides. When my husband left me for a younger woman, I said the exact same thing. I was left with two young boys to raise. But God heals, and God provides. I now have a wonderful husband and beautiful twin girls through him. He is a great father to all four of our kids. God is good.

Teresa - posted on 12/22/2009

I've only ever been w/ one man. Regrettably we started having sex before marriage (early 20's). I felt so guilty, but found ways to try and justify my actions.... That failed, but I AM forgiven. :)



Same man left me almost 2 years ago now because of, in his words, my lack of cooking, cleaning, and sex which were apparently my only 'wifely' duties... to say nothing of the love, commitment, support, and friendship that I DID provide!! My lawyer got a 'kick' out of that one. @@



Anyway, I have twin 8 year old daughters right now and I am TERRIFIED that they are going to end up pregnant as teens (or younger) because they may go looking for the 'love' and relationship that their father doesn't provide them with.... As their mother, I do the best that I can to raise them in a loving, Christian home and continue trying to provide them w/ positive, loving, male role models, but I fear it won't be enough. :(



On another personal side note though... Unless a miracle happens between my ex and I, I can almost guarantee (99.9%) that I will never have sex again. I will NOT have sex outside of marriage again and I don't see myself attempting to trust another man enough to marry him.

Marley - posted on 12/21/2009

This is a very touchy subject for everyone but I can add to it from personal experience. I am a 17-year-old mother right now. My son is a little over 5 months old and I am still with his father and plan on getting married to him after we are both finished with college and are financially set with good jobs. I have always had a strong relationship with God and before high school had planned on waiting until I was married to have sex. I then met a boy my freshman year who forced me to have sex and then left.. I then had a mind-set that sex meant nothing because it was taken away from me. But after I met the guy I am with now, I realized that sex is sacred and of course, I wish I were still a virgin but that's life.. and I love my son more than anything in the world and wouldn't change anything. It's just how things work out and it does not make me less of a person or have less of a relationship with God. It all depends on the person.

Maureen - posted on 12/21/2009

Unfortunately the body is ready for sex long, long time before the head is. I agree the media plays a huge role in teens' life. And, if you've been clothes shopping lately, you realize they are trying to get the pre teens into womens' clothing shops by down sizing all the clothes ! One scary thing I have found out - even if the kids are not having intercourse they are having oral sex ! Because they don't consider that as sexual relations. Billy Clinton agreed apparently. It becomes very casual - and of course we're only talking the girls giving blow jobs. Porn is so much more available than when I was a kid. Sneeking a peek at my Dad's magazine that his friend would loan him was a big deal then !

So aside from concern that children are getting themselves into situations they are not mature enough to handle, there is an acceptance of demoralizing and subverting young women.

Rabecca - posted on 12/17/2009

There is so much that I think contributes to women and making this choice and it wasnt until I was much older that I could really see a bigger picture And as much as this may sound crazy I think it dates back to the womans movement and roles of men and women really started to shift ( please that I dont think that woman arent willing and able to do almost anything a man can because its not that we cant but ask your self if thats really what we are suppossed to be) when you move from a society that the men are totally responsabile to provide and this weight of duty that he knows it's up to him and he gets a pride from that sucess and also society looking at a man as less than if he turns from that responsablity to women holding there own and getting that mind set of well if he leaves I will just have to work or work more so we will be fine and girls growing up in homes were mother ( for example) saying well he can just leave or he left so I will be single date maybe kids have to take care of themselves because there single parent is at work alot so they may not have as many boundaries as kids in the past would have had or they have father issues because there is no dad in the home to show little girls how a man is suppossed to treat a woman to love her like christ loves us and a father to show a young boy how to be a man and a man of duty to take care of that family .

I think that all has just been this trickle down effect a few generations in a row and we have a mess on our hands now I can tell you most of my friends dont eaither know ther dads or just never really had any kind of relationship with them and woman have started to get this ideal of they dont need a man well you dont need one to keep you at home and kep you preganant but marriage is a gift from God and those roles that he gave us he gave us for a purpose his purpose man and women both have this very vital part in raising kids and being examples of strong men and woman we as woman started to think anything he can do I can do better well that goes to show in our new generation of woman that think out doing men in there behaviors and sexuality is cool and a good thing and a normal behavior as far as its okay to have sex before marriage its okay to have as many patners as possible .

I would be lieing to say I was not right there in that life a long while back it just didnt seem wrong to me I mean girls can be just as destuctive to other woman because the ones that arnt doing it are now the outcast instead of honoring and praising those that stand firm and hold there self as worth more and men getting this idea in there heads that well if shes not going to do it the next girl will because there will be plenty of others who will so we give into the its normal to have sex before marriage .

Woman our age come from mothers who took charge and raised ther kids on there own they are strong woman but i hate to say not that best examples because of this well if you cant fix them you need to leave them mentallity instead of this you do not leave your marrige you dont fight and pray to your last breathe for God to intervien ( I do not consider abusivness as part of that if your husband is violent I think God forgives a woman for leaving that destructiveness) but just leaving because your not happy is not a good reason and it has been shown that those who stuck through that not happy marriage 5 years later say they are very happy in that marriage divorce does not instantly make you happy and has lasting effects on every person involved and even the next generations . But to add men have grown up without dad so why would it be wrong for him to move on too thats the example he was shown .

All of this has added to this generation of sex , families not being the biggest part of our country and this ideal that the more you have the better more rounded person you will become and we are shuving lies down the throats of our youth they are praising lies the real path to happiness is to find our roles again to expect more from ourselves as woman to not settle for a man who will not honor you with a lifetime commitment first !!to hold ourself responsilbe to seeking the truth and sharing that with young woman to share our stories of what was it that we did and how did we find was wrong with that I gave myself away in a matter of speacking to men who were not right because they didnt marry me or even want to why would that have been okay with me because when I met the man I know God had intended for me I would have waited forever if I only knew that kind of true love was there if I knew the blessing I would have found I wish I knew then that I would have wanted to give my all to this one person but I couldnt because part of me was given away along time before I even knew he excisted I was 28 when I met the man I know for sure God made just for me if I could tell that 15 year old girl 28 not that far away hold out because you are going to meet a true man in every sence of the word who knows there may not be this part of me I wish belonged to him but that I simply can never give him I am cant say I think we all need to stay home and just raise babies but I think we need to start to move back to a family oriented socity and prya for our young people to hop ethey can see what our former generations have lead them to and hopefully change can find a path with Gods help

Melissa - posted on 12/17/2009

I slept with two people before I was married-- a guy I thought I was supposed to marry, and then the man that I really was supposed to marry. My biggest regret of my life, hands down, is not waiting for my husband. Notwithstanding the pre-marital sex, I was definitely NOT pure throughout high school and college. Somehow I felt that 'fooling around' was ok as long as I didn't have sex. As our pastor says, our culture is drunk with sex... every part of our culture is saturated with it. Sometimes, as in my case, the world's voice drowns out the still, small voice that we should be listening for. Funny enough, I'm actually glad that I was being a huge hypocrite at the time, because I was coaching a middle school cheering squad and I shared with them that I believed behavior like mine (though they didn't know it was mine) was entirely innappropriate.

That being said, I agree with Elizabeth... people, especially young people, shouldn't get married just because they're pregnant. Pre-marital sex is a sin, but so is divorce, which is likely where a marriage like that would end. I don't think it's in anyone's best interest to heap sin upon sin... take some time to get to know the person, raise the child together (which you don't have to live together to do) and then make that big decision.

Elizabeth - posted on 12/16/2009

I think that the world in general puts a huge emphasis on sex. They make it sound like a glamorous game. When people are bombarded with sexual images and comments, it becomes normal. It makes them believe that it is not that big of a deal. Also, I think that girls in particular are being pressured to be a certain way just because men want them to be that way. They are insecure because they don't have the perfect body. But who does? Most celebrities are airbrushed or have plastic surgery. Very few have natural bodies that look like that. So, young girls feel like they have to be perfect to get any guy to date them. Then, once they start dating a guy, they feel pressured to have sex due to the media and the fact that the media has told boys that it is ok to expect sex out of a girl. The media tells us that if a girl doesn't have sex, she is not a person that others will want to be friends with and even in the future won't have friends or boyfriends. And I have realized that these feelings and thoughts can also be true for young Christian girls. Although I think it is less likely to act upon these ideas, it does happen. Girls are just SO insecure these days. I admit that I have struggled with body issues even being married to a man that tells me I'm the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, has never cheated on me, and even liked my body during and after my pregnancy.



I completely agree that if a girl thinks she's mature enough to have sex, then she should be mature enough to make a commitment to that person, but remember that are two people who decided to have sex. Just because we don't physically see that a male is expecting a child, doesn't mean that it is ok for him to not make a commitment. In addition, I believe that it is better for a couple to have a child out of wedlock and not get married if they are not sure if it can work than for them to get married and end up divorced. Obviously, in a perfect world, the marriage would last, and they would eventually get over their differences, but that is not at all how the real world is. Having a child at a young age is much more stressful often due to immaturity, inability to financially support a child, and having to make sacrifices such as putting off schooling.



My mom had a baby girl out of wedlock when she was about 24. Her self esteem was so low, that she thought that if she were pregnant then people would know that someone wanted her. Later on, she realized that she was too immature and would be unable to properly provide for the child, so she gave her baby up for adoption. Her situation with the baby's father was not one that would teach the child what a healthy relationship looks like. Also, I have friends who have told me that they got married because they had a child together when they were 17. The husband does not take any responsibility when it comes to their children and obviously has no desire to be married since he often is out until early in the morning and is not faithful to his wife. The wife ended up dropping out of school, because she was at school so much that her daughter would cry for her sister who watched her during the day. I believe that their relationship is not at all a healthy one to raise a child in. They were pressured to get married by the husband's parents, and both do not believe that their relationship will last. I also know a girl who had a baby in high school and decided that she did not think that marrying her baby's father was the best choice for her or her son at the moment. She could not guarantee at that time that their marriage would last. Four years later, they are still together, and I think it is very likely that they will one day be married. Some people are not meant to be together. Yes, sometimes people make the wrong choices of having sex together before marriage, but that doesn't mean that they will be able to make it being married (which they should've thought about in first place). Both people have to want to be married and put all of their effort into it for a marriage to last.



Also, I hate that people (often Christians) look down on young girls who get pregnant out of wedlock. Just because we can see the evidence of her sin where ever she goes, doesn't mean it is at all ok to think less of her. Everyone sins. Sex out of wedlock is just one that has extreme consequences. I actually smile and pray a blessing for women who are pregnant no matter their age, because they are choosing life.

Lena - posted on 12/16/2009

John and Stasi Eldredge

Heather - posted on 12/16/2009

Lena, who is the book by?

Lena - posted on 12/16/2009

Quoting Renee:

I definitly agree about the fact that in today's society sex is everywhere. It is used to sell toothpaste, shoes and cologne.
As a child I grew up in a Christian home, went to church and over the years a Christian school & Bible School. My home life wasn't always a bed of roses though and over the years I developed an attitude and started to have resentful feelings in my heart. What I heard at church and saw at home (or in other ppl) wasn't the same, so I saw the hypocrasy. I ended up dropping out of Bible School in my second year and kind of walked away from God, not because I no longer had a heart for God, but because I didn't know how to make sense of the hypocrasy. In the time I spent away from the Lord, I was taking part in some worldly activities - and to be honest, I could have done a lot worse than I did. Because I felt lonely, I tried to find that love in guys. I ended up sleeping with 2 guys before I was married (now I know thats not a lot compared to what ppl are doing today, but even just 1 person is too much before you're married). The second guy ended up being the guy I married (and am still married to) and have 2 (and one on the way) kids with. I said all this to say, to this day (after almost 5 years being together) I wish I could have given him the greatest gift that God intended for us to give our mate. For my husband he was not a Christian at all, so he had slept with his fair share of ppl, but now being a Christian he also wishes the same thing. I really think it's a shame that advertising has maximized on the "sex-appeal" and therefore uses it to give people a false sense of happiness. Because what people don't realize is, everyone you sleep with has a peice of your heart and by the time you find that person you will spend the rest of your life with, do you really only want to give them 1/4 of your heart?
For myself and my husband we both want so much better for our kids. Right now they are only 4 & 2.5 so we aren't at the point of talking yet, but one day!
Personally I think what is missing in kids these days is TRUE inner confidence, knowing that you are better than to just give yourself away.
But that is just my opinion coming from someone who has had personal experience.
In terms of coming from a Christian background and rebelling, I believe what was missing was an intimate relationship with the Lord. I think too many times kids are taught that being a good Christian is what we do, we go to church, we obey the rules and that's the end. They are not taught to have a personal intimate relationship with the Lord. Cause being a Christian isn't about rules it's about relationship. Ok I guess I've rambled enough! Good topic!

This is well said! I am definitely going to use some of this as quotes. And good point- Christianity is not all about going to church, knowing the Bible, its about Relationships too! There is a really good book I've read called "Captivating" I think every woman should read..

Renee - posted on 12/16/2009

I definitly agree about the fact that in today's society sex is everywhere. It is used to sell toothpaste, shoes and cologne.
As a child I grew up in a Christian home, went to church and over the years a Christian school & Bible School. My home life wasn't always a bed of roses though and over the years I developed an attitude and started to have resentful feelings in my heart. What I heard at church and saw at home (or in other ppl) wasn't the same, so I saw the hypocrasy. I ended up dropping out of Bible School in my second year and kind of walked away from God, not because I no longer had a heart for God, but because I didn't know how to make sense of the hypocrasy. In the time I spent away from the Lord, I was taking part in some worldly activities - and to be honest, I could have done a lot worse than I did. Because I felt lonely, I tried to find that love in guys. I ended up sleeping with 2 guys before I was married (now I know thats not a lot compared to what ppl are doing today, but even just 1 person is too much before you're married). The second guy ended up being the guy I married (and am still married to) and have 2 (and one on the way) kids with. I said all this to say, to this day (after almost 5 years being together) I wish I could have given him the greatest gift that God intended for us to give our mate. For my husband he was not a Christian at all, so he had slept with his fair share of ppl, but now being a Christian he also wishes the same thing. I really think it's a shame that advertising has maximized on the "sex-appeal" and therefore uses it to give people a false sense of happiness. Because what people don't realize is, everyone you sleep with has a peice of your heart and by the time you find that person you will spend the rest of your life with, do you really only want to give them 1/4 of your heart?
For myself and my husband we both want so much better for our kids. Right now they are only 4 & 2.5 so we aren't at the point of talking yet, but one day!
Personally I think what is missing in kids these days is TRUE inner confidence, knowing that you are better than to just give yourself away.
But that is just my opinion coming from someone who has had personal experience.
In terms of coming from a Christian background and rebelling, I believe what was missing was an intimate relationship with the Lord. I think too many times kids are taught that being a good Christian is what we do, we go to church, we obey the rules and that's the end. They are not taught to have a personal intimate relationship with the Lord. Cause being a Christian isn't about rules it's about relationship. Ok I guess I've rambled enough! Good topic!

Victoria - posted on 12/16/2009

You know it's sad, but it's not even just young people, I know so many people in there late 20 and up who think it totally okay to go out and have "recreational sex". I know people who were married & then separated for what ever reason (both vallied and not so) or divorced & they think because they are not "with" anyone anymore it's totally okay to go be "with" anyone & everyone they want. And then there is the whole thing of living together before marriage....I won't even start on that one as it can be a very touchy subject with some. I think that the morality of the whole world is in the toilet & our best course of action is to pray for everyone, both christian & non, children, youth, young adults, adults & elderly (I know a lady in a home and she said some of the people their run wild). We need to keep praying the blood & the word over our family's no matter how young our kids & continue to speak the truth.

Heather - posted on 12/16/2009

Victoria, I didn't even think when I wrote my reply. We should pray for the young people around the world, as this problem truly is not limited to one country. Thank you for that reminder.

Victoria - posted on 12/16/2009

We teach our Youth & Young Adults that having sex before marriage is basically cheating on the person that God will eventually bring to be your husband or wife, we really focus on purity too, not just from the sexual aspect either, purity of mind, thought, speech, actions.

Sex as Heather said is a sacred thing in the eyes of God, that's why He talks about man leaving his parents and cleaving to his wife. There is a spiritual aspect to sex, that's why when a man and woman come together, they become one. Again I agree with Heather, if Christ isn't held up as Lord, we can't expect the world to keep Godly, moral values, all we can do is speak the truth in Love and pray for our country, (mines Canada/UK) and teach our own kids the difference.

Great topic to discuss, Thanks.

Cheryl - posted on 12/16/2009

Don't even get me started- even the clothes that's out there!

I totally agree, I know my kids are still young but there are times I am so afraid for their purity and futures (and yes, then I bring it to the Lord). I was fortunately enough to be a virgin when I got married (a surprise to the doctor when I went in for birth control pills, a 21 year old virgin!) but I wasn't perfectly pure... I had done almost everything else because as a teenager in church I was taught not to have sex. Purity was never explained. So when I was a teen group youth leader for a few years, that was my hot topic. One of the guys leaders was known for always talking about the dangers of alcohol... i was known for always talking about purity. The girls knew, if you were in my group then be prepared ;-). I had several moms thank me later!

There are some good Christian materials out there about it, atleast we're not flying solo in this persuit to impress purity and standards on our children.

Anne - posted on 12/15/2009

Hi Lena, I agree with what Heather said. As a mom of adults daughters, both raised in the same Church, same home,rules,both parents still married to each other, our oldest daughter rebelled against all of this and for several years was not living for the Lord. Our Youngest although as a teen her commentate to Christ was not nearly as strong as it is now did not rebel.

But it is not just young people who fall into satins lies. I have a cousin that has made the statement before marring his second wife that he left his first wife for that if the marriage started to not be fun he would be out of there. this was said after they had already lived together for 2 or 3 years. I think it all boils down to the overly causal way the Entertainment, and advertising industry, have reduced sex and commitment as God meant it to be into something cheap.

I can think of one celebrity that has been in the news a lot lately. Not only is his life a mess because of this sin in his life, but just think about the influence this is having on the public that is hanging on every word written or reported on this.

Heather - posted on 12/15/2009

Lena, sex is sacred before our God. He reserved it for man and wife. The reason that it is so bad today is because most people don't have a relationship with Jesus. The only way to fight this is to share the truth with our children, friends, and anyone else we can. Pray for the young people in America to learn the truth.