My 13 year old refuses to go to church. Sleeping in seems like a reward... should I force her?

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Kathleen - posted on 11/02/2009

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As I write this may God continue to bless you richly in all you do, in addition to surrounding you and your family with a hedge of protection. It is not a matter of you forcing your a 13-year old to go to church. God has placed you over her/him and it is your responsiblity to ensure and make the right decisions for your child. Going to church is mandatory in your household, which is something that you do as a family. Remember a family that pray together say together. Once you allow that child to start staying home for church you will be dealing with somebody that will no longer think like you spiritually. Remember as Christians once Satan realize that he is unable to attack us he begin to come through our children. With that said, get your child up and let them know that going to church is something that we do as a family, and they do not have the choice of staying home.

Once again, I pray that God will continue to bless and keep your family, in Jesus name. Have a bless day!

Jennifer - posted on 11/04/2009

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I think forcing her is not the right way to go. I would tell her that it is fine if you would not like to go and respect her wishes. At the same time, I wouldnt let her stay home and sleep. If she doesnt want to go in church, I would say that we are going to church and you can go with us or stay in the car. This is what I started to do with my teenager. Your daughter will probably will get mad at first, but most likely she will end up going in the future. My daughter believes in God on day and not the next. Since I have stopped making her go to church , she has actually walked to the church up the street and went on her own. She still will go with the rest of the family though. In the last couple weeks, she has asked if we are going to church Sunday. I just answer yes and ask if she would like to go. She is not getting mad when I ask now, she will just say maybe. I know alot of people that were made to go to church and they rebelled and became hateful towards the church and the Lord. This is such a hard decision to make. I know that when my daughter is not in church with us, I feel guilty that she isnt there learning what we are. At the sametime, when I make her go, she would get so angry and is pushed God away more. Idk if there is a right answer to this question. I just pray and hope that I am making the right choice and ask God to lead me the right way with her. Hope this Helps :). GOD BLESS and I will keep your daughter in my prayers.

Angela - posted on 03/16/2012

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I don't think you should force her to go. I was forced and so were my siblings. I found God on my own in later life. My 3 siblings are one atheist and 2 agnostics. They're the kind who describe themselves joyfully as "devout apathists" when asked what their religion is. (One of my own kids actually thought that was a proper religion, LOL!!)



Forced Church attendance was the main unpleasant thing I endured during a horrible childhood and adolescence. Far worse than physical brutality, curtailment of a social life with other children & teenagers, lack of privileges & treats etc .... In fact it meant so much to our father that we danced to his tune in terms of religion that it became a very good tool for manipulation when we wanted something. Speaking with enthusiasm about something that was meaningless to us and maybe voluntarily attending a mid-week service as well was a small price to pay when these actions might co-erce our father into giving us some privilege ...



Is this the kind of spiritual relationship you want to foster between God and your daughter? If it's not, then I wouldn't insist your daughter attends Church.



God wants to see sincerity in the personal relationships people build with him. If your daughter is just going through the motions to please YOU -or rather to keep the peace with you (and doing so with a very bad grace when she'd far rather be doing just about anything else), then there is certainly no personal relationship with God going on. And there's definitely no sincerity. So why bother?

Danette - posted on 03/16/2012

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Angela - my sweet glad you found it funny but I'm not laughing that's the difference between me and you. My house is not a democracy. period. In my house there is one Big Mama like in my parent's house there was one Big Mama and so on. and what Big Mama says goes, period - end of discussion.



Docile enough - that was another funny one - I SEE WHO RUNS YOUR HOUSE. I RUN MY HOUSE - AND YOU BEST BELIVE MINE ARE DOCILE ENOUGH!! I could care less about their "autonomy" you give your teenager's choices, you care about "what they want to do when it conflicts with what you told them to do... LOL!! Knock yourself out - that I find funny as well..



I do not give children adult choices that live in my house, that I gave birth too, that I provide food, clothing and shelter for. They do not have the option of disagreeing with what I saw which is Mommy law.



Big Mama does not compromise with her offspring. I said you will go to chruch, you will usher on the usher board, you will sing in the choir, you will pray and you will do this things with Mommy, grandmommy and great grandmommy or you will answer to Mommy and my kids don't like answering to me :-)



Do I worry about them losing faith or mocking God not at all - because when you train them up in the way they should go, though they tarry at times - THEY WILL NOT DEPART FROM IT! TRUST!

Angela - posted on 03/16/2012

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Way to go, Danette Tucker-Hooper! Let's hope the teenager in question is docile enough to go along with it and not like my siblings & me .... (I take it you read my post - just before your own and you know exactly what's likely to happen to a teenager who has his/her religious choice & autonomy taken away?)



As I said earlier, there's a whole world of scope - scope for teenagers with NO religious interests successfully manipulating parents with religious beliefs and principles by simply "pretending" to be interested. God won't be mocked but if a child/teenager feels browbeaten into attending Church, you can sure as hell guarantee they're not likely to be receptive to the Christian message in later life when no-one's making them.



Your post was hilarious! Thanks for making me laugh today and God bless you!

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Danette - posted on 03/16/2012

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Yes you force her. She's 13. You are the mother and you know what's best and you train up a child in the way they should go that though they depart they will not tarry from it as the Bible says..I talk about this on our parenting show on NPR all the time - Where did this Parents and Kids are equal stuff come from?



If this was your parents or mine they wouldn't have even asked. Why do we continue to give our children options like they know what is best for them??? Why? Do you know what is best for your child or do they? Are you laying the foundation for their Future through God's guidance or are they? Yes they will have choices when they are grown but they aren't grown yet. It's your responsiblitly to make sure that Child goes to church - like my daddy did us - get it up, let's go. Don't care if you don't want to go - I'm daddy, I'm in charge, Love you much now let's move. You will be incharge of your life soon enough but until then FATHER/MOTHER KNOWS WHAT'S BEST...

Laura - posted on 11/06/2009

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yep - drag her out of bed and make her go, even if she pouts all the way through.
she is only 13 - that is far too young to be running your household!

Linda - posted on 11/05/2009

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Yes, I would just make her go. Scriptures say's train up a child in the way he shall go and when he is old he shall not depart.This just means when she/he are matured they won't leave what has been put in them.Please don't give up,Maturity takes longer for some.Their was a time my children didn't want to go.I insisted because we are the parents.scriptures say's The parent is laid up for the child. training is hard and sometimes unpleasant but the rewards are great.Pay no attention to the sulken face. You are the mom and you are doing the right thing.Continue to do what the word of God tells you to do. As for me and my house we will serve the Lord.

Jaclyn - posted on 11/05/2009

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I agree with Yansi... The more you force a child/teenager to do something the less they are gonna wanna do it and when they get older the first thing that they are gonna do is run in the other direction.. God knows all and see all and knows what is in all of our hearts so when she gets that calling on her OWN soul she will find HIM.. It's all in due time. I was forced to go to church and then i chose to leave the church as i got older, however, that knowledge about God and His works and HIS EVERLASTING LOVE for ALL HIS CHILDREN has made me yearn for a spiritual relationship with him.. God has His own way of getting our attention. When the time is right she will hear His voice and take heed but it has to be her choice.. Like the Bible says God gives us freewill so shoving God down her throat aint gonna make her wanna have a relationship or go to church more. It is your house and your rules but a walk with God is an INDIVIDUAL walk... My best advice is TO PRAY and ask God for direction and just ask him to worry her soul so that she may seek Him and understand the joys that u receive out of being in the presence of other christains.... Let her learn to find Christ on HIS time.....

Paula - posted on 11/05/2009

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You know this is a hot topic, but this age group is a turning point in their lives. I have 4 children and 10 Grandchildren and when my kids moved out then they were allowed to do what they want but...when they lived in my house they went to Church...Joshua 24:15b...but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD."

ROSA - posted on 11/05/2009

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YES,I believe you should because at 13 how does she have a choice and what did God say you raise a child in the way they should go and when they strey they should come back and just make it exciting for her because she is getting older. I have a 12 yr old and so she knows after church we are going to eat and she LOVES to EAT! lol Be BLESSED and dont give up on that because us as mother's we are training them for their family.

Kimisha - posted on 11/05/2009

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Hey Lorie,
That is your child and remember that scripture that says "as for me and my house, we're gonna serve the Lord". So if you must defend yourself, tell her that. Let her know that that is your house and whether or not she wants to serve the Lord is up to her but she will at least reverence and honor Him one day a week.

Heather - posted on 11/05/2009

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i am 20 and not really best with advice but God is telling me right now get in her in church he has a plan for her and you! this will bring you two closer when all is said and done! Jeremiah 29:11 great verse! i was 13 not to long ago and the things i did were not of God but with the force of my mother i stayed in church and prayed for the convictions of my sins later i had told her i refused to go she didnt make me go and mad alot of mistakes if it wasnt for her telling me to go when i was 13 i wouldnt be the woman who i am today! after i ran from god at 17 i rembered at 19 that at the most vunerable age that he wa there for me and who led me to him!

Sally - posted on 11/04/2009

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that's a hard situation specially the age.... have you sat with her and explain to her why you feel it is so important to you????

Kimberly - posted on 11/04/2009

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Going to church was mandatory at my house as well and of your daughter don't have a good reason for not wanting to go I think you should encourage her to go but don't force her to go because that could make matters worst my opinion

Beth - posted on 11/04/2009

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yes, I am a preachers kid, and was made to be in church everytime the doors where open. Do I agree 100% with that NO. however, I'm the mom who allowed other things to influence me as to my rules with my kids ... I didn't make them go and before I knew it i was out of church too. Big mistake. don't let kids run your life you are the parent. Lovingly explain that she must go during atleast one time per week, and that is out of respect for you . Pray really hard that during that time, she hears one thing that makes her want more. Raise them in the way they should go ... and they will not depart from it . ..Both my kids are back in church on there own, and me too. Thank the Lord. He doesn't say ask them which way they want to go..... be the parent. I learned the hard way, but by the time I took back the controll they thanked me.

Elyssa - posted on 11/04/2009

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maybe she feels unimportant because she cant relate to what the pastor is saying,. ask her how she feels

[deleted account]

To me the big question is "Why doesn't she want to go to Church." I have four children, and one of them has chosen the extremely rebellious route. For her refusing to go to Church was a direct attack on our authority as her parents. It was/is very important for her that we insist that she attend Church with us. I have three other children who choose not to butt their heads agains the wall every time we make a family decision, and I can see how in some circumstances it might be appropriate to allow the child to stay home, especially during those early teen years where they are starting to think independently.

Felicia Howard - posted on 11/04/2009

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Remember you are the parent. If thats an reqirement;then yes she should go!!

Kristin - posted on 11/04/2009

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I don't think I would put it as forcing but that you and your husband have decided that God is first as he schould be and that when she moves out it is her decision but as of now she needs to do as the rest of the family does and that is to go to church on Sundays. Teens can be very boundary pushing :) Good Luck and prayers to your family.

Beth - posted on 11/04/2009

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My husband and I have several things that we require of our household. One of them is that they must go to church. It is how we live and worshipping and serving Jesus is what our lives are all about. When they are on their own they can make that choice for their household. Pray about it, sweetie. God will show you what is right for your own family. He is your compass and not all of us! I would never say that ours is the only way. I just wanted to share what we have done. Will pray for God's peace for you. Just remember, you job is not to make her happy but to train her up. She will fall in love with you again after the hormones settle!

Mary - posted on 11/04/2009

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You will go to Church,That is the rule as long as you live in this house!! was what my mother always told me!!

[deleted account]

Teenagers can think of a million things to do rather than getting up early and going to church. I know it doesn't sound right , but force will be the only way. My mother still has to do it to my baby brother.

Teresa - posted on 11/03/2009

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I'm a little late here. My daughter is 21 and my son is 18. When they decided they did not want to go any longer we did not make them. The Bible says nothing of forcing your children to go to church when they are old enough to make their own decision. It is our responsiblilty to raise them in the ways of the Lord and be examples to them. It doesn't take church to do this, we as Christians are the church. My daughter only missed a few Sunday's and then decided for herself and made a committment to live for Christ and be pure. She is doing great. My son is still not going to church but we have many conversations. God never forces himself on anyone, we should not either.



Pray for their salvation and for them to come into a personal relationship and to have their own experience with Jesus. As a bible teacher/ministry leader, I have seen too many teens "play" Christian for the sake of their parents, it has its consequences.



Just my two cents. I will be prayng Lord bless you always. You remain faithful and they will return to their roots. In Christ, Teresa

Barb - posted on 11/03/2009

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I suggest no, BUT compromise. If you go to church every Sunday, keep it that way. Basically, let her have one or two Sundays per month where she can sleep in when she wakes up, as part of the compromise, she has to participate in an at home family Sunday school, include crafts and discussion,even a treat. It can all be related to the topic of your choice or passage that you choose to focus on. If you force her she wont want to learn, compromise with out sacrificing at the same time. Most kids feel if you force them, then the more likely they are o resist, God does not force himself on us, but he does give us several choices in life. As parents we want our children to be safe, physically and spiritually, in the world today we need to. But this may still encourage her and continue to preserve the values you want her to learn but still just "be a typically kid" the things we think are small and insignificant are huge to kids especially teenagers. BUT when doling this compromise she must hold up her end of the deal and participate or you cant work with her...Children obey your parents...

[deleted account]

It is an unspoken understanding in our home. You live by our rules, as long as you live under our roof. Going to church is one rule. Getting them involved in church activities or such will help. Our church has a youth program that our 13 years old son loves.

Margie - posted on 11/03/2009

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For the lady thats child does not believe in God. Ask her who discovered that the world was round.( Christoher Columbus) Ask her what year that was. (1492 AD) Next say, would you agree that the Bible was much older that that? She will, have to say yes. Then thell her to read Isaiah 40:22. That should clear everything up. And yes, I would make her go to Church.

Teresa - posted on 11/03/2009

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Yes, you make them go to school because it is good for them. Make them go to church for the same reason. One day they will want to go to school and they will be all grown up. Likewise one day they will love church becaue God was able to get a hold of their heart!

Danette - posted on 11/03/2009

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Bridgette - I totally agree. We just covered that topic on our mom's show on NPR, we called it Bratzilla's. Not saying that "our 13 yr old" who refuses to go to church is a bratzilla, but a few of us mom's agreed with what you said myself included. In our haste to give our children the best of what we did not have we forget that we had the best of all. Love, committment, discipline, togetherness, honor and many other attributes that made us who we are. I too suggested on the show, take away the blackberry's, the Wii's, the flat screens etc. and get back to the basics just as you said. They will see how good they have it and how we are not asking for much in return.

Bridgette - posted on 11/03/2009

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Maybe she isn't happy at the church you attend. Does it have an active youth group? My husband and I assist with the youth group in our church. It sounds like she isn't happy there. If she is refusing to go, simply tell her that she is living in YOUR house and that she must obey your rules.



This is what my mom did with me:

If she becomes sassy or rebellious, start removing her fun. Take away cell phone, internet, etc. You are only required to give food, clothing, shelter. Give her nothing more than a bed with plain sheets and quilt. NO name brand clothes, take her to goodwill or the salvation army. Then cook simple old fashioned foods, like beans and cornbread.

Believe me one week of this and she will adjust her attitude. My mom had me in nothing but rags and no fun stuff. I even started cleaning house to show my appreciation for her.

Danette - posted on 11/03/2009

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Mom, I think you have too because you are doing it for her good. I remember growing up it wasn't an option, I had to go - and at that time hated it. But as a mother now, I see why and I'm thankful my parents made me go. It was my faith in God that got me thru the rough times of my life and if they hadn't made that foundation for me I wouldnt' have had it.

Cara-Shea - posted on 11/03/2009

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I never even knew I had a choice not to go while we were growing up. The only times we stayed home were due to illness or horrible weather where we couldnt get out. I think that ujntil they turn 18 if you say get up you're going then that's your right. Your house means your rules.

[deleted account]

I know lots of people who had just one bad experience with a Christian or with church and became bitter and jaded toward God for years, if not the rest of their lives. The devil will find anyway to lead us away from God and forcing someone to go to church can give the devil an easy in for making God seem like a bad guy. That being said your daughter needs to know that this is what you believe and why you think it is so important that this is what you believe. Maybe make a compromise with her, have her just come to Sunday School or attend the youth functions, make her do family Bible study with you so that she can see the importance of God in a more private setting. And if you're worried about the sleeping in seeming like a reward then tell her that she doesn't have to come but she has to get up when you do and give her a list of chores to complete before you get home.

Charla - posted on 11/03/2009

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I have a 13 yr old daughter that refuses to go to church also. But it does't work! We GET to go to church, we don't Have to go. It is a blessing to be in the Lords house. They have to go to school everyday where they learn things from other kids that they shouldn't. What better place than the lords house to teach them the right way to go.

Davina - posted on 11/03/2009

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I would force her to go because if you want her to see how good God is and want her to have a relationship with Him you need to. Especially if she won't go on her own. Children shouldn't have a choice between going to church and staying home. We have to mold our children and they need God in their lives too.. age has no respect of person when it comes to God.

Natasha - posted on 11/03/2009

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I would first try to find out the reason for not wanting to go. If it is not serious she has to understand that obedience has its rewards... she can sleep AFTER Church.I Personally think that when we give in in this area it could spell trouble later.She is still a minor and until she's able to take care of herself outside of the home this should not be an option.

Brandy - posted on 11/03/2009

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My mom never FORCED me to go to Church at that age, and I told her everything, even though we had our moments, when I was a teenager. I told her about the first time I tried alcohol, marajuana, and smoking cigarettes, and even sex. I know most of the kids that were going to church were doing the exact same things just in spite of thier parents, but I was doing it out of curiosity. Being able to express myself to my mom was great, because she could tell me that she had also done some of those things and explain what effects it would have on my future if I would continue to do them. Your daughter is at a junction in her life. Don't push her, let her take her own path and the whole family will have less stress and worry.

Brandy - posted on 11/03/2009

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If you make her go in spite of her true to heart feelings right now, it will lead to some serious rebellion latter. Don't become the enemy. Allow her to feel like she can feel free to express herself to you about her feelings, because as big as this may seem now, it will seem much smaller if she never learns to trust you and ends up doing drugs or having premerital sex behind your back in like 2 or 3 years from now and doesn't tell you about it!!!

Brandy - posted on 11/03/2009

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Research shows that at this age that forcing her would just cause her to rebel even more. At this age she is discovering who she is and needs to be allowed to start making her own decisions about the direction that she wants to take with her life, of course with guidance from mom. This may be a sensitive issue for her even if she acts like it isn't. I would say, don't push her, God will make his way into her life when the time is right. Everything happens for a reason.

Amanda - posted on 11/03/2009

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I am sure as a parent you want what is best for your daughter. Just look at life... we make our children go to school because educationally that is best for them, we make them clean up because physically that is best for them, wouldn't you continue with that and do what is best for her spiritually and make her go to church.

Donita - posted on 11/03/2009

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I will tell you like my parents told the 6 of us growing up. " On Sunday morning we get up and go to church as a family, When I leave the house everybody leaves the house if not the will be a price to pay when I return" If your rule is going to church on Sunday morning then your children have to follow the rules of the house. That is how we are losing our children we give them to much of a choice. I am guilty of giving mine a choice but when it comes to church there is no choice. Also keep her lifted up in pry and talk to her maybe church is not interesting and then find out if there is something there and activity in order to make it more interesting

Lorie - posted on 11/03/2009

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April, your perspective and insight from your personal experience at my daughter's age was very encouraging to me. We have a youth group, but she isn't engaging with them. Her friends at school are not Christians. This isn't helping at all!

Lorie - posted on 11/03/2009

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I love the comment..."My roof. My rules." But I also want her to learn to make good judgment calls when she gets older. The "because I said so" doesn't work so well when they get old enough to ask, "Why?" Thanks for all of your encouragement and patience with me as I volly this very personal argument with you. The ladies on this site are fabulous! May the Lord richly bless each and every one of you!!!

Lorie - posted on 11/03/2009

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Thanks Melanie. Yes, it sounds like a good idea to just state: "We're going to church as a family." Then when she asks, "Why?" I can just reply, "Because that's what we do." I don't want to make a big deal of it, and maybe just matter-of-factly stating my intention will be enough. She can only fake being sick so many weeks right? LOL

Lorie - posted on 11/03/2009

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Quoting Yansi:

Lorie, I will tell you my mother made me go to Church every single Sunday and ... I didn't want to be there...the good Lord will be with your whole family even if at this moment she wants nothing to do with him.



Hi Yansi,



Thanks so much for your input. This is EXACTLY how I felt at her age too. But I came back to church when I was older. I agree about setting a good example. She learns from what I do, not from what I believe. That is so true!



 

Katie - posted on 11/03/2009

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My kids are still very young so I haven't faced that problem yet. I am sure that when they do get old enough though, I will do everything in my power to keep them in church. When I was going into high school I went to church camp and that is when I first started getting involved. My parents didn't go to church but I was asked to go to camp by my older sister who was leaving high school (who I didn't live with. she lived with our mom and I lived with my dad). I started really getting into church and loved to go to all of the high school activities although I could only go every other weekend while at my moms because my dad didn't want to drive 30 min. to take me to church. Church seemed to be life outside of school and my dad believed that I was doing more than that with the friends I had from church. Everytime he wanted to punish me he would keep me from going to church, so it is kind of the complete opposite position.... I am not sure why I just said all of this, but it was really nice to be able to talk about it.... Good luck with everything and our family will keep you in our prayers.!

MELANIE - posted on 11/02/2009

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i was exactly the same way at that age. when i started drivin iwould lie and say i was goin and would go somewhere else. it was a must in our house to go to church and i dispised it because i felt like i had to be there not because i wanted to but because i had to. it wasn't until i moved out that i decided i wanted to be there. you have to do what you think is best. my mom tryed giving me these teen books with stories about cchurch and special things that happen to people that go to church and believe. she might be hanging around someone that doesn't go and think its uncool. it can be all sorts of reasons. you need to find a good reason to make her wnt to go. do yall have a teen group or a teen mass?? i always liked going to those. the teen group leader can speak to her and answer her wuestions of why its so important to go and what it really means to go. if you force her she will restrain more from what i experienced. i hope i helped.

Priscilla - posted on 11/02/2009

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Lorie, In my family going to church is just what our family does and the children aren't given a choice. Explain to your children that as their parent, you know what is best for them and attending church is good for them. Tell them that this topic is nonnegotiable, that they will be going to church with you, and that if they give you a hard time about it on Sunday morning (or whenever you worship) then, they will have priviliges taken away (computer, TV, cell phone, grounding; whatever you feel is appropriate). Teenagers always try to test the limits to see how much they can get by with and believe me, they will respect you more if you stick to your guns than if you capitulate to their tantrums. My children are now ages 26, 24, and 11 and they have all been raised in the church since they were 2 weeks old. In particular, my 11 year old has been in Bible study with me since he was 2 years old and he loves the Lord, is not a bit shy about praying at family gatherings and he loves to go to church. Stick to your guns on this one, this is very important, your child's eternal life is at stake here.

Mary - posted on 11/02/2009

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I think that a child needs to go to church as well as you do. I asked my son this question, he said yes but baby steps. He is 13 and I will be honest, I do not go to church like I should but my child makes me feel bad when we don't go. I think my son was trying to say about baby steps is that maybe if it is sleep that is the problem have your child to go at night. Maybe just Wednesdays. Maybe have your child to go to bed earlier. Whatever works I would try to do. Good Luck and I will be praying for you and your child. Your friend in Christ! mary

Twyla - posted on 11/02/2009

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i am a preachers kid . oh yes mam u should . kids r made to so to school, ther soul and wher they wil spend eternity is the most important thing in the whole wide world !!!!

Brittany - posted on 11/02/2009

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I wouldn't say force her... because one day she might come to resent it and not go to church as an adult. I say reward her for going. Make life as hard on her as possible while she's not attending. If it were me, I would wake her up and say, ok while we're gone to church i need this and this and this done and I want it done before we get back. If it's not all done before you get back and make sure if you can afford it to take your family out for a treat after church.... to ground her or punish her for it not being done. Maybe sh'll see that hey if i go to church with my family i won't end up with extra chores. Then it may take her a while to actually let God in and listen to the message.

Sara - posted on 11/02/2009

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I was a terrible teenager, and I have since ask for forgiveness from God and my Mom. As I think if you spend time in prayer and in the word you will find the answers cause God has them all. My opinion would to be to go with the majority "Your house, Your rules", also as I quoted for someone else and this applies to all of us who have children, Proverbs 22:6 (KJV). Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. The example you set at home will make a difference, continually tell and show her what God continually does for your family. Our love and prayers are with you. May God bless you and your family.

April - posted on 11/01/2009

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hi lorie, does you church have a youth group? maybe someone close to her age that she could relate w/, maybe that would get her interested. i know i used to hate going to church, b/c i felt i didnt understand the message, and it was soooo boring! but when i got w/ other younger memebers of my church, we would do fun church activites. we also had young adult members who would, "break down" the word for us so we could get a better understanding of what the pastor was saying. but really you are the mother, and if its your decision for her to go then she should go..... simply b/c you say so. like i said i didnt too much enjoy going @ that age, but now i'm glad my parents made me go.

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