my 5 month old still won't sleep through the night. Anyone have any suggestions for me?

Jillian - posted on 02/14/2009

Quoting Linda:

...The middle of the night is the perfect time for prayer Instead of getting upset, use the time wisely. I've had some of my best conversations with God in the middle of the night.

God Bless you Linda!  Thanks for reminding all of us moms that middle of the night time is perfect prayer time - and who among us doesn't need more of that??

Tracy - posted on 02/13/2009

i used to have that problem wth 2 of my older children but i found play some quiet good god music in background and pray peace and calm in to the room it works praise god x

Melissa - posted on 02/13/2009

Personally, I let both of my kids set their own schedule. My son slept thru the night at 2 months & my daughter at 7 months. I did notice with both of my kids that they stopped eating as much when they would wake up at night. They did this on their own. I did notice that they started eating only to soothe rhemselves back to sleep & not because they were actually hungry. Once they started this, I tried giving the a pacifier when they woke up instead of feeding them. This would always put them right back to sleep. Again all children are different (as you can see by both of mine). Mine never cried it out. I helped them learn to self soothe with the pacifier. My 8 month old may still wake up occassionally(she has only been sleeping thro for about a month) but it is usually before my husband & I go to sleep & because she can hear us. She takes her pacifier & goes right back to sleep. Try to notice if your baby is actually hungry or just needs to be soothed. You are the only one who truly knows your baby & what is best. Use your instincts as a mother & trust yourself.

Ally - posted on 02/13/2009

also the AAP and la leche league have published many reports on the dangers of "babywise" i would read up on that before trying to put your infant on a schedule. It has led to many cases of failure to thrive and serious dehydration.

Ally - posted on 02/13/2009

Quoting Shelly:

Oh my goodness why are all of you mothers so afraid of what has stood the test of time and last I checked no one has died from it.  I bet most of you were raised on the same thing.  But a little ceral in a bottle with breast milk or formula never hurts.  I just can't understand  all of this new wave thinking on raising children.  Most of parenting is using common sence.  If all the stuff that Drs. and phycaligist are trying to feed us then how in the world did all of us servive.  Yes there are a few things that have been discovered over the years that has helped but ladies please quit putting so much faith in the BOOKS use some common sence and you will do fine...Give that baby some ceral he/she just isn't being satisfied with just milk.    

 

 

From reading your comments it is really hard for me to take you seriously. You sound very ridiculous and it is foolish to try and tell people not to listen to evidenced based practice presented by people who have taken the time to research developmental issues. Information changes constantly and you are obviously not up on your current  healthcare information. I am a registered nurse and find it appalling and irresponsible for you to tell someone to put cereal in the bottle of a five month old. First , it is a huge chocking hazard  not to mention feeding babies solids that early has been PROVEN to lead to childhood obesity and allergies.

 

50 years ago we didnt know that smoking was bad for you or to sleep babies on their backs (which has led to a 70% decrease in sids rate) so before you go telling people to just do things that their mothers did maybe you should  inform yourself on the risks associated with the things you are suggesting. A lot of babies DIDN'T survive way back when and it's because of all the research being done that people are living longer and healthier lives.

 

And to Randa, 

Please do not let your baby cry it out...or give them water  they are still growing and need to not fill up on empty calories. I recommend the baby sleep book by dr. sears it gives you many different coping strategies and explains in great detail the inner workings of your little one and why they are designed to not sleep through the night at this point. If it makes you feel any better you are not alone i am still nursing an 11 month old twice a night...if you haven't tried it I would recommend co-sleeping..it has worked wonders for our family and everyone it getting more sleep. Just remember this too shall pass and you will wish they were still wanting you at night :)

Linda - posted on 02/13/2009

Every child is different. Some will sleep through the night at 3 weeks, and some not for a year or more. Some babies will cry, and then go to sleep. Others will cry for two hours. My advice is to not worry about not sleeping. The middle of the night is the perfect time for prayer Instead of getting upset, use the time wisely. I've had some of my best conversations with God in the middle of the night.

Gillian - posted on 02/13/2009

All kids are different and all sleep through at dofferent stages. my eldest slept all night at 8 weeks but my son didnt until he was nearly 3. he is 6 now and what wouldnt i do for him to need to cuddle me in the night now. i know its no comfort but try to enjoy your time at night with your child when it is just you and him and the Lord...but dont forget that you need your sleep too, so if at all possible when he naps in the day you go nap too...housework will still be there when your baby goes to college...time is short...grab every bit even the bits in the middle of the night.

Alicia - posted on 02/12/2009

All this banter has really blown me away, I wouldn't have imagined that it would be in a Christian forum.
Every baby is different and will have different needs (just like adults) so the one approach for all is not going to work. I am not going to give any advice or comments here for fear of being attacked for my views.

Good Luck Randa I'm sure your baby will sleep through when they are ready.

Maggie - posted on 02/12/2009

I totally agree with Jillian. Babywise is dangerous. It has produced many failure-to-thrives babies. Not all babies and young children are going to sleep through the night. That's just the way it is. They will eventually. Take your baby into bed with you if it helps the two of you sleep. That helped us a lot. I also second The No-Cry Sleep Solution. If you doubt the problems with Babywise, check out http://www.ezzo.info

 I know sleeping issues can be hard. Hope you find something that is good for both you and baby!

Corissa - posted on 02/12/2009

Babywise!! I used it for my daughter who had some problems consistently sleeping through the night. We finally picked a night and let her "cry it out" which ended up only lasting 15 minutes and then she never did it again (except for teething or sickness). Also, if you are using sleep props such as a pacifier or rocking/feeding your baby to sleep, now is a good time to stop that. Babies do not need to suck past 3 pr 4 months, and if sleep props are used to put your baby to sleep, then they will wake up and be disoriented because the sleep prop is missing. Letting your baby cry it out is teaching him/her to learn how to fall asleep on their own and how to put themselves back to sleep when awoken in the night. Hope that helps!

Randa - posted on 02/10/2009

listen i didn't ask this question for people to fight about it. WE are supposed to be mom's helping one another out. Thanks for all you your help and I am taking into account all that has been suggested.

Danielle - posted on 02/10/2009

I wouldn't sweat it! I have a 18 mth old that still wakes up at night sometimes. Not all kids sleep thru the night early.

Crystal - posted on 02/10/2009

Where exactly was I personally attacking you? I have never said I was perfect either, however I take my job as a parent seriously and I do not just spout off things that are not okay for babies.

Please no longer speak to me if you cannot treat me with respect, ignore my posts or I will have to report you for harassment as you continuously have been singling me out. I will pray for whatever your problem may be, as God can only really know.

Shelly - posted on 02/10/2009

Crystal,

  There is no need to personally attack me!  The last time I checked the one and only perfect one is Jesus. 

Crystal - posted on 02/09/2009

Quoting Shelly:

Oh my goodness why are all of you mothers so afraid of what has stood the test of time and last I checked no one has died from it.  I bet most of you were raised on the same thing.  But a little ceral in a bottle with breast milk or formula never hurts.  I just can't understand  all of this new wave thinking on raising children.  Most of parenting is using common sence.  If all the stuff that Drs. and phycaligist are trying to feed us then how in the world did all of us servive.  Yes there are a few things that have been discovered over the years that has helped but ladies please quit putting so much faith in the BOOKS use some common sence and you will do fine...Give that baby some ceral he/she just isn't being satisfied with just milk.    

 

First, if you're going to spout off that you know more than doctors and pschyologsts it would work better if you at least knew how to use spell check at least to me.  I'd take you a little more seriously that way.

Second do not give your child cereal in a bottle, if you want to give cereal then give it on a spoon, in a bottle it poses a choking risk.  Second why are so many parents still so hands off on their kids?  God put them in our womb for 9 months to be cuddled, and cared for they were warm and close to us and then all of a sudden you want to put them out in the world by themselves??? I say that is NOT what God wants!  Years and years ago, in the time of the BIBLE they nursed their babies to the age of 3, they co-slept and I can gurantee you they didn't feed them cereal in stupid bottles....they kept their child worn on their bodies, met their needs when they needed them, such as they cried at night, you nursed them, they seemed hungry you nursed them.  They wanted to be held, they went in a carrier.

Children respond much better to you being attentive to their needs rather then pushing them to be independent right out of the womb.

Shelly - posted on 02/09/2009

Oh my goodness why are all of you mothers so afraid of what has stood the test of time and last I checked no one has died from it.  I bet most of you were raised on the same thing.  But a little ceral in a bottle with breast milk or formula never hurts.  I just can't understand  all of this new wave thinking on raising children.  Most of parenting is using common sence.  If all the stuff that Drs. and phycaligist are trying to feed us then how in the world did all of us servive.  Yes there are a few things that have been discovered over the years that has helped but ladies please quit putting so much faith in the BOOKS use some common sence and you will do fine...Give that baby some ceral he/she just isn't being satisfied with just milk.    

Nicole - posted on 02/09/2009

Its tough! I am a mother of 4 and our youngest will be 2 in March. He still doesn't sleep through the night (most nights)! Each child is different and has different needs. Be aware that the same thing doesn't work for everyone and you can read every book out there (as I did with my first two) but you are the only one that can sooth and nurture your child. I am one who doesn't allow my children to cry alone in bed for any length of time and feel that they are only young once....yes I may be sleep deprived for awhile but when I hear Brady calling me at 2 or 3 am, I feel joy that he is calling me to simply refill his sippy cup, perhaps change his diaper and tuck him back into bed. I feel like when you "seize that moment" as a mommy, nothing is a greater blessing. (perhaps a little more sleep would be nice someday) But for now, don't stress about your child being 5 months and not sleeping through the night, cherish it and hold them close as they grow up all too soon. If it helps..I only ever had one out of my 4 children sleeping thru the night by 6 months! Take Care and God Bless! 

Jillian - posted on 01/28/2009

There's another thread that's very similar that I just posted to... sleep is something so many of us mommies feel we need more of! 

Just a point though - developmentally, babies under a year are DESIGNED NOT to sleep through the night.   This is a period of rapid development and one of their primary jobs is to nurse frequently at night to ensure an adequate milk supply for their survival.

Your LO's brain is still developing. He has yet to develop something called Object Permanence - it's the ability to understand that just because you can't see an object, it does not mean that the object ceases to exist. This cognitive ability will develop around 1 year. Prior to that, when you leave him and he cries, in his world, you have ceased to exist. It is a terrifing experience as you are the most important person to him - you are his whole world.

Every major medical and psychiatric organization in this country has denounced the "cry-it-out" methodology - Ferber, Pearl, Izzo (Babywize and Growing Kids God's Way), etc... (Just a point here, I know Babywise was already recommended to you... the author has no education in child development, child psychology, pediatric sleep patterns, pediatric medicine, lactation and breastfeeding, nutrition, etc, etc and some of the actions he recommends can carry potentially dangerous outcomes!) After decade long studies, babies who have been left to CIO have repeatedly shown to have statistically significantly more difficulty with relationships - friendships, dating, marriage, jobs... That's why orgs like the AAP all recommend if your baby cries, and he's less than 1 year, you should go to him and meet his needs - you can't spoil him.

Additionally, there has been a ton of research as to feeding solids before bedtime. Although this is something that "our parents" swore by, current research shows the opposite to be true. Loading up on solids right before bed can often cause gas and bloating, making night time more troublesome for everyone involved.

So, what are you left to do?? I recommend Elizabeth Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solution" or Dr. William Sears' "The Baby Sleep Book" or "Nightime Parenting" as having good, evidence based information. If your LO is in his own room, you could move him into yours. When he wakes, bring him to bed and nurse him laying down - everyone will get a ton more sleep and you'll be helping him developmentally as well.

I also encourage you to look to the Lord. If He is our Father, and we are His children, then He has modeled the perfect parent-child relationship for us. When I cry out to Him, He doesn't say, "Sorry kiddo - you're going to have to self soothe - I've got other stuff to do." No, instead He's promised to always be there - immediately - for me.

One last note - this helped me a ton. Have your DH get a tape measure. Stretch it out to ~90 inches. If each inch represents 1 year, your lifespan is around 90 years/inches - take a good look at how long 1 or 2 years really is in the scheme of a lifetime. It's a drop in the bucket. Although sleepless nights are tough, giving your baby the security and love he needs now to grow into a trusting adult is worth the short time you'll spend missing out on some ZZZ's.

Randa - posted on 01/28/2009

thank you so much I will give it a try!!!

Katie - posted on 01/28/2009

I used On Becoming Babywise and it really worked on putting my Daugther on a sleep/nap schedule. I loved the book and it worked wonders. At 5 months your child is capable of sleeping throught the night, I would start with just not picking up when they wake up. Wait and see if they go back to sleep, if not go in and comfort and leave. It might just be a habit that they are used to. If you don't get him up then they will get the idea and go back to sleep. Babies have sleep cycles and they have lighter and heavier times of sleeping so that might be when your baby is waking up. If you are still feeding when he wakes up then try leaving a sippy cup of water in the bed and seeing if that works. It might take some crying on your baby's part but you just have to be strong. Even wait 10 min. if they cry then go in and comfort, then try again. Good luck!!!