Leann - posted on 02/23/2010 ( 10 moms have responded )
my husband and I have been married for about 8 1/2 years, and it has always been kind of rough. He is not the easiest person to live with, and he has left a trail in his life of broken relationships.
I have some baggage of my own, I have been mistreated many times and it is hard for me to trust any one.
Any way, I work 2 jobs, plus have a 1 and 3 year old I take care of every day, and volenteer some in our church, help some disabled family members and take care of all the household paperwork and appointments and keep track of bills, holiday and birthday planning, cleaning, organizing, meal prep, ect., and for some reason my husband views me as lazy. Every body else says they don't know how I do it, they view me so differently than him. At home, I am not allowed to relax- always to clean (atleast that is how he makes me feel; he complains and gives me a hard time if I get on the phone, internet, lay down for a rest). When I am with my family and God- forbid I spend any time with friends... I get an ear full, and sometimes while I am on the phone at the person's house. He says I should be at home cleaning, ~that I am wasting my time going to my parents or sisters house or whoever, but CLEANING is what I am doing all the time!
No matter what I do around the house, he still complains and nags me to the point where I don't want to be around him. I can't stand it, this fighting has been going on for years - just more frequent and persistant. I have tried to change, I have tried to get organized and make him happy, and he is so arguementative all the time and never notices what I do. He has lost patience with me, and I feel hopeless; wondering if he will EVER be satisfied with me. We don't really have a relationship, we might watch tv together, but don't really spend time together we have never gone on vacation together - between money issues and him "getting stuff done" attitude instead of spending much needed time with his family. And, with him so grouchy, why would I want to spend any time around him?
With his attitude, I don't want to be around him, or be married to him any more even. I just feel stuck. And, lately have even been feeling weak and tempted to cheat. I crying out for help, prayer, suggestions....ladies? I would appreciate any thing right now. I have felt rejected for so long, because it's not just his constant complaining and nagging (which is enough in itself!), it is also cursing at me, calling me vulgar names, and I have forgiven him so many times, and he still does it, and it hurts.