Sheparding a child's heart

Christelle - posted on 03/29/2009

Thanks all, I've started to re-read it, slowly, actually studying, with Bible in hand!  I've since had to do 2 spankings, quite chuffed that I managed to do it very calmly, talked nicely, quick spank with the wooden spoon and then we said a prayer, also it as Amanda mentioned for direct defiance only.  Hope it goes well from here!

Amanda - posted on 03/27/2009

What I have found is that there really is a lot more play room than it seems.  I think the most important thing in this book is about getting to the heart and to not be afraid to spank - but it's not the only form of discipline.  I use it only for 'direct defiance' - not for breaking house rules, not for accidents, not for meltdowns.  When that 'foolish and defiant' attitude shows up, that's when we bust it out.  But that works with our extremely strong willed son.  Take the principles and make it work.  Also try Ginger Plowman's 'Don't Make Me Count to Three' - based of Sheparding.  Also, if you go to theresurgence.com and search for tedd tripp there is a video series he did for them.

CHris - posted on 03/27/2009

Funny, we felt the same way, esp. about the spanking.  We have a child with special needs and the more "violently" we disciplined the worse violent she became.  Not every type of discipline works for every child.  I do believe however that we are to teach our kids the underlying sin of every misbehaviour.  We need to teach them the fruits of the spirit  and all their and our sins go against these.  So I think  we have to help them to understand where there behaviour is stemming from and nip it.  And never ever permit these things to go by unchallenged.  Just as our heavenly Father disciplines those he loves, so we must discipline those children he entrusts to our care.  Hope that helps.  Blessings.  Chris

Sonia - posted on 03/27/2009

I loved this book, and recommend it often. The main point I took from it was to have a plan of discipline thats understood by both parents and the child, so that everyone knows what to expect. I also loved how it taught me to address the root of the problem and not the bad behavior so that you could deal with both. They understand that we will be talking about whats really going on while at the same time their actions still have consequences.

As with all parenting advice though not every method will work for your family. But discipline is commanded by God and I would pray and ask God for his guidance and direction for your family.

Jennifer - posted on 03/27/2009

Christelle,



I haven't gotten to read the book just yet but it is on my list to. But I can say that I tend to discipline in anger. I get caught up in the moment and forget to take a deep breath and just get caught up in the moment, especially with a ADHD son. But after finding out that he was, me and my husband sat down and have really prayed hard that He gives us the patiences to go through this. We struggle every day with how to discipline our children but with every day there is a new challenge but with every day there is so many prayers that are being lifted up for us as well as for our kids.

Claudia - posted on 03/26/2009

I am a huge fan of this book.  I love the concept of getting to the heart of a child and the root cause for the behavior.  I also like that it teaches how God has given us the gift and responsibility of parenting and that if we "slack off" then we are in disobedience to Him.  We give a warning, but if our son continues in disobedience we do follow the suggested biblical discipline, we talk about why and make him repeat the offense to us, we pray together, he asks for forgiveness, then hugs and kisses and it's done.  I like the idea of immediate discipline so that it is not a long, drawn out process.  My son knows exactly why he is being disciplined, he knows that I have to obey God and he knows that we do it because we love him and we want him to learn how to obey God. 

Cheryl- Chris - posted on 03/21/2009

I love that book!!!! I need to get my own copy, but still remember enough of what he wrote!!!! The best thing to remember that just because a person can write a book, does not mean that each set of parents will be able to follow it to the letter of the law. My husband and I have taken so many "experts" and combinded them into our own unique way of discipling, and that works for us. Pray about it~ God will show you how to best parent!!!!