thinking of changing churchs?

CORRINE - posted on 04/25/2010

Hi I am a Mum and Grandma full time. I have left the church that we have been going to, no one would contact us to see how things were going, couldn't get close to anyone. Our Lord would be very disppointed with the church today. I have found a great little church who live Christ. We have a 9 yr old special needs daughter and 3 yr old granddaughter and 2 yr old grandson full time. My husband works on Sunday so I needed somewhere people would be there to encourage and help. Praise God for His goodness. Because the church is small there is no crech so I take along rugs for the floor, colouring pencils, games, books and toys that don't make noise.This seems to work well so far. The Pastor commented a few times how isn't it wonderful how children praise the Lord in church (meaning the noise they make), this made me feel much more comfortable. The ladies are awesome they really do care. It's not easy so praying that God shows you where He wants you.

Rochelle - posted on 04/14/2010

First consult God and then decide. BOSS is an excellent place of worship should you decide to leave. I am more a traditional church member and there are just certain things I prefer as far as worship so I no longer go there but I would recommend you check it out. The services are shorter in length but full of GOD's word. They also have a wonderful Childrens Church. I promise you won't be disappointed. Be Blessed!

Sharyn - posted on 04/14/2010

I'm not a big fan of "children church"... though going to children sunday school is great. I know what you mean though as far as wanting to hear the word and be able to absorb what you're hearing. But our son is right in the church nursery while we're in service and serving. The ladies there are awesome and keep us up to date on everything that goes on. He loves it there too. It depends on who's watching your children and if it'll benefit the both of you where ever you choose to worship. It's the Word you receive that's important! Wish you the best on whatever you decide...

Donna - posted on 04/14/2010

Karna that is a excellent Idea. there are usually other mothers going through the same thing. I have a autistic nephew and he goes to church with my grandmother. I myself have teenagers and when they are there I make them sit with me if I am not in the choir stand. They get antsy too. But that would be the perfect solution for her problem. Don't let the devil stop you from getting the word because he will work through your children, I know.

Crystal - posted on 04/13/2010

I speak from experience here. It is not easy to move to a new church. I have two little ones. Our church didn't have a nursery at all. I got stuck watching my own little ones and those of anyone else who brought theirs. The church finally got a nursery worker but I tried letting my 3 year old sit with me and when he got noisy I got dirty looks. Some people went so far as to quit coming to church because they didn't like my 3 year old making noise. Other things happened so my husband and I decided it was time to find a new church. We started going to a church with a nursery but it only went through age two. That meant my 3 year old HAD to sit with us. I was so worried about getting dirty looks if he got noisy but everyone was encouraging. It was hard to make new friends at first but eventually it worked out. There are still problems though. The nursery worker is very old and can barely walk. She has her granddaughter help out but she is usually on her cell phone. We have people volunteer during the services to help out but the church really needs to hire another nursery worker to help out the one who is already there. I am glad we changed churches but it was hard to leave old friends and change churches. Finding a church that meets all your needs is not easy. There are still areas that our church is trying to work on for children ages 3-5. You have to do what is best for your family though. If your church is not meeting your needs and they are not concerned enough to try to meet them, you need to try to find a church that is willing to meet your needs.

Rebekah - posted on 04/13/2010

What would I do?! Girl, I would pray!!! I would seriously get down on my knees and turn this over to God. He knows your heart, He records your tears, He knows the heartache, He knows the stress, etc. FROG - fully rely on God for this matter.



The power of prayer is an AMAZING thing and it can alter so many things - even your kids' behavior in church - wow!



Let God direct your path, whether it's to stay or find a new church home...



As for the people that seem to have a looking problem when it comes to your youngest child - just tell them God's presence is all over him and he just can't contain the joy and love inside, he's gotta shout it out! :)



Actually, it's a proven study they have done in churches - when the spirit of God is moving, kids that are in the adult service will sleep, laugh, or play amongst themselves (not distractively - meaning running all over the place or screaming at the top of their lungs, etc.). And the other side of the study, was in churches where the spirit of God didn't move, the kids would fuss, scream, become impatient, run, etc. I think that study says a lot about God's presence! :)

Karna - posted on 04/13/2010

For basically 4 years, I almost skipped chuch, because I also struggled with my small kids in the church. Every now and then I got someone to look after my kids, and then I went and enjoyed a service - all by myself. Changing churches might not necessarily solve your problem, unless you find a church with Saturdaynight services as well. Maybe this is God calling you to start a support group in your church where moms in similar situations make up a team. For example two or three moms look after the kids, while the other moms left over can enjoy the service, and then next service you swop around???

Janet - posted on 04/13/2010

you need a church that caters to you and your needs. We have a nursary and childrend childrens church where the kids are only up styairs for the singing and the announments and they go down stairs for a bible story and active for them.. We all are involved with the kids on a rotating basis so we can hear the word too.

Anita - posted on 04/13/2010

It's one christian helping another so thank you for letting God work through me to help you!

Julie - posted on 04/12/2010

I REALLY LOVE ALL YOU GUYS ADVICE.I CAN ONLY THE THE GOOD LORD FOR THIS GROUP.AGAIN,THANK YOU LADIES.

Anita - posted on 04/12/2010

Yes, I know to well about sensory integration disorder and the problems it can cause. Most likely you need to attenda church that is equipped for children such as your son or JUST go to a church that ALSO has KID"S CHURCH during regular adult services. I understand as I too have 2 out of the 3 with a disorder and I know what your going through but mine are NOW 17 and 18 so I survived and believe me you will too!!!!!!! My thoughts are with you. Many blessings dear!!!

Sheryl - posted on 04/12/2010

thank you andrea and heather! i am not sure yet what i am going to do. i did set down with one person and they said they would help. but see hear the thing. i know she also need to hear the word of the lord to. with my youngest there just no way i can have someone set with me and keep him quit. with his disorder he has a hard time setting still when his not buckled in. plus making noise! see if it where a lot of younger people i think they would understand more but are church has alot of older people who are very stricked. i am in the south (the bible balt). plus to top it off the church is going to help build are house through hab. hamunanty. then the house is also near there not even mile away from there. so this just make it really hard. cause i do love everyone and there are just like family. but i am not sure if it time to move on to another church that has more of a children church also. cause i would also like my kids to be able to learn. not just play. like reading them a story. but i really do thank you ladies for some advise. i think i am going to talk to my father in law tonight. who is a pastor at another church then maybe talk to my churchs pastor. oh an thank you andrea for what you did about staying going to church. i love church it help me get through my week cause the world is differently testing us all. it not god falts it no one everyone it just different. god bless all you ladies.

Donna - posted on 04/12/2010

First of all do they have a place for youth that you can take them during the service so you can be fed. Secondly try sitting in the back of the church and bring something that will keep their attention. If you are being fed there pray on it and talk to some of the women in the church you feel in your heart you can trust. sometimes when we are going through things we don't ask for help we just expect people to know. Pray on it God will show you, but never leave a church before you take it to God. Offense is one thing you don't want to have to deal with.

Heather - posted on 04/11/2010

Julie, I don't think that I could go to a church where my things got stolen. However, I would also recommend doing a quick pocket check before going into church just so you know exactly what your kids are taking in. I have to do this before my kids go to school each day... Kids are kids, they take things they aren't suppose to. One of the youth pastors sons at my old church went to church one day with an entire chess set in his pants pockets!

Julie - posted on 04/11/2010

Andrea,thank you.i really needed some input.i agree about the church making mistakes and pray about it.thats why we were still there.today issue just topped it.do keep us in your prayers.as i will my christian mommies.stay blessed.

Andrea - posted on 04/11/2010

Julie, it sounds like there are some underlying problems in your church, if even the sunday school teachers are pitted against each other. It couldn't hurt to check out some other churches in the area ~ as long as they are solid theologically. If you know another pastor that you trust, you could even ask for some assistance. Remember, even people who work at a church can still mess up sometimes and need forgiveness. I'm very sorry so much stuff is happening to you at church ~ that's the last place things should be stolen. Definitely pray about it, and I will be, too :)

Julie - posted on 04/11/2010

i could be wrong.i don't know.i don't want to go by my feelings.i have accidently left 2 bible's behind and never recovered them back by anyone.went to the parisher and lost and found.my children 7 and 5 have been complaining of older kids picking on them.i tell them to tell an adult.they nobody listens.i myself went to talk to the childrens teacher.sunday teacher blames the wednesday teacher,wednesday teacher blames the sunday reacher.i get nothing resolved.my five year old took 10 dollars(without permission) an older child sold him a bubble gum for the 10 dollars.i let the teachers know.nobody knows anything.and even with pointing out the child.no resolution.my 5 year old (again with out permission) took a leap frog game to church.it was taken away(wich i don't disagree) but was not given back.again i go talk to teacher.the game is no longer there!i know my son was wrong.i gave him consequences for that.what about the adult in this situation.it was just flat out stolen!am i wrong to be upset?am i wrong for wanting to look for another church?no matter who i talk to,there's no resolution. i need a loving christian advice?

Heather - posted on 04/11/2010

If you really love the church, and the church family, I would recommend talking with your pastor. Let him know what's going on and how your feeling, and see what he has to say. He might be able to make it more doable at this church, or even suggest another that is similar to them?

Andrea - posted on 04/11/2010

It is pretty hard to take kids to church, especially if no one offers to help. Is there anyone you know well enough to ask to sit with you and the kids and help out? Or does the church record services so you could listen to the message later if you couldn't pay close attention during it? I'll be praying that you find either help at that church or another one. The church we go to offers nursery and children's church during the message so parents don't have to worry. Try checking out some other churches that are more kid-friendly in that regard, or have services on another night during the week. I'm glad that you'd rather change churches than stop going altogether, and I know that God will bless that effort :)