Children reunited with parent after 5 years of foster care!!!

Tonya - posted on 05/09/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I'm looking for help. My husband's children were taken into states custody due to actions of his note ex wife. I fight alongside my husband to get his kids back for 5 long years. CPS threw every curve at us the whole way. After 5 years of the kids being in foster care we finally got custody of them. We have had them now for 3 years. They are now 12 and 10. I am looking for advice on how to deal with their behavior. They will not listen to anything we ask. They have put marks on themselves and told us we did it to make us feel guilty when we didn't do anything. Our 12 year steals our 10 year still poops his pants and wets the bed every night. They refuse to listen to anything we say even after three years. Our 12 year old took a pair of her used panties to school in her backpack!!! She hordes things including trash in her bed. We have tried everything we can think of please help!!!?

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Sarah - posted on 05/09/2016

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What kind of therapy of counseling have they had in the past and currently? The behavior you describe is classic of kids who have been abused; hoarding and bed-wetting. What does CPS say about the history of the foster care they had?

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Sofia - posted on 07/14/2016

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I feel so sorry for these children! They needs lots of therapy, lots of patience, lots of love. God help them

Tonya - posted on 05/09/2016

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We've had them in counseling through our church. The kids seem to know exactly what to say and when to say it to tell people exactly what they want to hear. CPS wants to take no blame at all. We have reason to believe my step son, the 10 year old, was sexually molested. CPS just comes back and says I don't see any reason for that to be true. The kids were always placed with single women in each foster home. We thought when we first got them here that the hoarding was just because of not knowing where she was going to be next and trying to keep belongings with her but three years later its still happening. My 12 year old step daughter will literally hoard trash under her pillow so we dont see it right it right away. We are always trying to be reassuring to the kids and let them know they belong but they still fight every effort we make. Their mother has not even contacted them in a year. I am the only mother in their life and I will always be here for them no matter what. I love them as my on flesh and blood children

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