homeschool or not?

Maricel - posted on 03/22/2010 ( 32 moms have responded )

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i have 3 year old twingirls and praying what i should do when it's time for them to go to school...i'm a stay -at-home mom. I do want to go back to school or work at home and I'm worried how the world out there is gonna affect my kids esp. when they turn teen-agers....most of the moms in my church homeschool and i will definitely have the support, co-ops etc. we can't afford a christian school until I go to work myself...what do you moms think? God bless you all!

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Carla - posted on 09/28/2011

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@Alisha--powerful stuff! EVERY person who has their children in public school NEEDS to see this clip!

God bless for posting it, sweetheart!

Carla - posted on 09/06/2011

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@Lanie--unless you live in the boonies, there are social networks of homeschoolers to plan regular outings or even play dates that will substitute for the social aspect. If your child attends Sunday School, this is also a social setting.



People tend to think of homeschooling as this isolationist-type setting, but it doesn't have to be. You can make it as private or as social as what you can physically take. Is your husband a Christian? If he is, hit him with the argument that what your child may lack in social interaction, he is going to more than make up with actual learning (homeschooled children are historically above the grade level of public schooled children), and you can teach him Bible that will definitely NOT be taught in public school. No frustrations with learning evolution and then trying to refute it, history can be correctly taught without the liberal slant of the text books. Personally, I don't see a down-side of homeschooling. I applaud you for wanting to see your child taught according to your conscience.



God bless, sweetie

Angela - posted on 09/03/2011

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I commented on the other thread on here about home-schooling. It’s quite rare in the UK, most of us have been educated at state school (including faith schools) or private schools (also including faith schools). It’s unusual to hear of people providing their children’s education at home. However I understand it’s quite popular in the US and therefore by no means unusual.

This does not mean that British people as parents do not educate their children at all – ALL parents teach their children, but by and large their FORMAL education is nearly always in a school setting. I went to school but learned some very useful things from my own parents that weren’t taught in any of the schools I attended.

My concern was that many parents may not be of a suitably educated standard themselves to teach their children at home full time. Ask yourself these questions ….

How is your mathematics beyond the basic ability to handle ordinary arithmetic? Can you teach your child calculus, trigonometry, advanced algebra, use of logarithms etc? What about topology, vectors, statistics (including standard deviation) and probability? These are all different facets of mathematics and the associated skills, techniques and knowledge of formulae are expected in schools of kids in their early teens (or even younger).

What about your standard of written English? Can you spell, punctuate, use grammar correctly, understand syntax? Do you have a good vocabulary? Again this is expected of kids from 12 upwards and in many cases younger children too. A massive number of adults (including those who are parents) don’t even know what a noun or a verb is! Going on from there – what is your standard of SPOKEN English?

Sports, “Gym” & physical education – are you healthy and fit yourself? How many children do you have? Enough to form 2 sports teams of the correct number? Do you have gymnastic equipment? Can you swim (many people can’t).

Religious education – are you able not only to teach your child Christian values and doctrine from scripture but also educate them about other faiths and beliefs and philosophies? Or would you be scared to do this for fear they might embrace another faith more enthusiastically? Knowledge like this is important to prevent a Christian child being too insular. Even in the (faith) school I attended we learned of other religions but as it was a Catholic school, a great many students could not understand or recognise that there were Christians of other denominations!

Languages and Music – every child should be able to speak another language – are you able to teach another language? Bearing in mind my comments on the suitability of anyone to teach English, similar standards are expected from successful students who undertake learning another language. What about music – is the musical education you give your kids going to be simply having a sing-song together or can you teach them to play an instrument and to read music?

I understand that there are Home-schooling co-operatives in many communities and I can see that this would be very valuable. But, for anyone who is seriously thinking about home-schooling their child – even with help from the co-op, I’d just like to ask this question – what is YOUR contribution to the co-op going to be? All of the above notes on different school subjects refers to the BASIC stuff. Specialised knowledge to the level of being able to teach it to others would be even rarer amongst ordinary parents.

This is a massive undertaking. I fully recognise the benefits as presented by other contributors on this thread, and wholeheartedly applaud them in their successes in educating their kids, but for ordinary folk like me – it’s pretty daunting! I’m a University honours graduate and I’m capable of most of the above as an adult but doubt very much I could home-school my kids.

Cara - posted on 05/06/2010

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My girls are 11 & 13, and aside from the first year, have been home schooled. There are many different styles of home education - everyone's will look different. Some are just like public school with schedules, workbooks and all. Some (like ours) use no textbooks/workbooks, and use good literature to teach most subjects.
One reason for home schooling, for us, is that God is not allowed in school :) Yes, many Christian students are there, but the % of Christian teens that lose their faith in high school is astounding. It gets worse in college. I have friends that said they wanted to let their kids be 'lights to the public school', only to have their son get 'converted' by the world, and their daughter become a mother. :(
We keep ours home. They have friends at church, youth, band practice, and go to co-op. They get out enough, maybe too much. And the best of all, they develop a love of learning on their own.
One last thing. I have friends who say 'oh my kids would drive me crazy. I couldn't be home with them.' When your kids are raised being home, they don't pick up the defiant attitudes at school. It is totally different when kids are taught at home from the beginning. I love being with my kids! and I say that having a teen daughter.

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Stacie - posted on 08/20/2012

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Also to add. Let's try as parent's to not belittle each others choices or be afarid of one schooling method or another. Personally, I want to homeschool out of love and trust not out of fear of public schools.

Stacie - posted on 08/20/2012

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Just food for thought... Homeschooling can be a lifestyle choice. Many families choose to homeschool dispite local Christian schools and decent public schools. Homeschooling isn't always a last resort. Many suburban and urban families homeschool. What is socialization? What is wrong with having friendships with only other homeschoolers. We're all people. Many public/private schooled children never "fit in" or play on a sports team- I hope those parents know their children will still have a happy adult life. Most homeschoolers are Not trying to recreate a school life at home. Many do not idealize the stereotypical school childhood. Some strongly reject it. They just want to live life as God orders it (if they are Christian) or how they personally see fit (if they are secular). Life is good, we are blessed to live in a literate culture steeped in resources-libraries and the Internet for example. Parent's are capable, we plan ahead and learn as we go just as paid teachers do. An institutional setting isn't for everyone-I have a good feeling it benefits society that we are all different. So Yes Homeschool-Give it a try a year at least. Your child will be ok, you will be ok even if you change your mind.

Teresa - posted on 11/03/2011

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No matter wheern my kids go to school, I am their primary example and teacher.

Lanie - posted on 09/05/2011

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I am wanting to home school for at least the first couple of years, but I'm afraid it's going to turn into a battle with my husband, who's all about the social aspect of public school. Any advice?

Julie - posted on 09/01/2011

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You have your girls but once -

and those years with them can never be turned around -

I would homeschool for their early yers then send them to a good public school ... but I would never work when you've got a husband to support you all. God's word instructs us to be keepers at home and for the husbands to provide for their families.

Maricel - posted on 05/06/2010

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thanks so much for sharing your experience...it helps me to focus...i still have a few years to actually start with a schedule but now i'm intensifying reading more books and more arts and crafts...i guess more consciously...before it was just a part of what i was doing already...you're giving me hope that i will be able to do it and i agree with all that what you said, because those are the reasons why we want to homeschool...i know my family will look at me crazy but it's our kids we want to raise the right way...i know it won't be easy but God is going to give me the strength, wisdom and most of all the patience i need...God bless you and hope to hear from you soon!

Toni - posted on 03/28/2010

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I personally don't home school. I don't feel like I would have the patience or the ability to keep up with it. I would always want to do other things. I think it needs to be something you think hard on and pray about. I believe it takes a lot of patience. Good luck to you and whatever it is you decide.

Maricel - posted on 03/27/2010

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I wanna thank you all again for your insights and prayers...May God lead your families into the right direction at all times too! Praise HIM for so many wonderful godly women like you!

Carla - posted on 03/26/2010

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My kids attended public school in the 70-80s, Christian school wasn't a financial option, and I worked full time, so homeschooling was out. Two out of three are serving the Lord. BUT, seeing school now, I would be horror-struck to put them in public school now. I don't know if you have charter schools in your area that are funded by state, but they are a little better. If you can afford to stay home and school them, I feel God will bless your effort! I understand what the others are saying, especially the one who had been home schooled, about making sure they aren't socially inept, but that can be remedied fairly easily. I think teaching them yourself will ensure getting in their little heads what history you want them having, not the ones liberals picture, and Bible history and/or teachings of the Gospels that coincide with your beliefs, not those of people who may not even believe in God at all!

Had I been financially able, I would have home-schooled. Good luck, sweetie.

Debi - posted on 03/26/2010

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I am a huge supporter of homeschooling. I am currently homeschooling my 12yo son and 17yo daughter. I have home schooled 3 other children. I love it, especially if you have the support of other homeschoolers which sounds like you do. Co-ops are wonderful, I have taught at 2 co-ops and my children took classes such as art, music, Spanish, Latin, Algebra, Science & Literature.

letteroftheweek.com would be great for you right now, it's free and FUN. I used it with my 12yo when he was a preschooler and we had so much fun.

Homeschooling has to be a calling you feel led to do, for whatever reasons. Some do it for religious reasons, but many are doing it because of the concerns of what their kids are learning (or are not learning) in public school and private school is too expensive. You can spend as much as you want as well. And your husband needs to be on board as well. He needs to be a part of the process and the schooling.

Best of luck to yall. I love homeschooling and even when mine are all grown and gone will continue to work with homeschooling co-ops.

Quita - posted on 03/26/2010

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I homeschooled my kids for 7 years.It was a decision I had to pray hard about.I loved the time i had with all 4 of the kids memories I will cherish forever.Each year I had to pray and seek God's guidance for our school. there are a lot of positive and negatives. just ask God where is He leading you.This is the first year the kids have gone to school and they love it. We checked out every school public and privet before we made our decision.We believe God sent us to the right place.The school they go to has a lot of Christian teachers who are lot afraid to share Jesus with people and they use Saxon which is a great resource.I got involved with all actives so that way I know what is going on. just pray and do you research.

Shana - posted on 03/25/2010

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As a former homeschooled individual i cannot over express the importance of socialization if oyu decide to homeschool. And i don't just mean with other homeschoolers, dance, gymnastics , t-ball ...whatever but get them out there in the world with other kids. I have seen far to many sheltered, timid, and socially inept homeschoold children to know that this aspect is huge.

I mean absolutely no offense to any homeschoolers outhere i total respect the decision, i am blesed with several wonderful christian schools near by so i have that alternative, otherwise i would consider it myself

Maricel - posted on 03/25/2010

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i am just feeling ecstatic aobut the LOVE i feel in here....thanks so much...everyone is such a big help...you all are in my prayers...

Vicki - posted on 03/25/2010

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Had to add something as I thought of this afterwards ...
My oldest is now 19, and my middle child is 17. Both are incredibly strong in their faith and have never attended anything but the public school. Granted, we live in a rural town and their class size is about 250. My husband and I are both involved in church and school activities, and I know our school is one of the dwindling population of public schools that still allows things like singing actual CHRISTmas songs and saying Christmas rather than "Winter Celebration." However, our kids have -- on their own -- joined school bible study groups and picked friends with similar values. I honestly don't know what we've done differently than any other parent, so I'd have to say it's by the grace of God that they've turned out so well.
I just wanted to say that just because kids go to a public school is no guarantee that they'll turn out bad. Be good role models for them, make sure they have a strong faith background and mentors or role models, and they can still become strong Christians in a secular world.

Amy - posted on 03/25/2010

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Honestly, I think it depends on the family, but that in most cases, homeschooling will give a superior education. My son is in public school.

I'm considering homeschooling him next year, but I'm a full time grad student (and SAHM), and I'm not sure I can effectively do both. Once I'm done with school, we'll look into private schools for our boys.

I went to private Christian school, and I'm so glad my parents made that sacrifice. After high school, it looked like many of my schoolmates have fallen away, but now, thanks to FB, I see how strong in faith EVERYONE I've found is. It just reinforces how important it is to instill faith daily, early on.

I think homeschooled kids learn how to learn more effectively. Parents can cater more easily to their children's learning styles, and there are great co-ops to participate in to expand horizons past a parent's skill base. My BFF (from 3rd grade private school) homeschools her 4, and I'm so proud of her.

I'm scared of what public school is doing to my son, and I know that if we keep him there next year it will be the lowest quality option, but will be a means to an end to get him into a private Christian school. There is no separation of church and state. There is a separation of Christ and State, but a different ideology is absolutely being instilled in our children in public school. At least I know this, so while I have my son in public school, I can work hard to fight it every single day.

It's a hard decision, with lots of things to weigh. I pray for your sense of peace over the best decision for your familiy!

Bev - posted on 03/25/2010

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Hi,.. All I can say is Pray and hear what God's plan for your family is. My story is that despite my children doing well at school, we felt we should home school. This was in 1997. At that time in South Africa home schooling was not as common place as it is today. Home schooling was very successful for us. I loved having my children at home and we have wonderful memories. At the time we started my eldest son was in Std 7 [grade 9], my daughter was in Std 3 [grade 5] and my youngest son was in preschool. The result was that my two eldest completed their schooling, and went onto university, both getting their masters.My youngest son was home schooled right up to the second half of grade 10, where he went to school for the first time. He will complete his schooling at school.

Home schooling gave my two eldest children the maturity to do well at universality having learnt how to work on their own and take responsibility for their studies while home schooling. While my youngest is proving able to go into the school system at a time where he knows who he is and is more able to resist the nonsense that goes on in the school system.

I believe there are two prerequisites for a successful home schooler and that is that you love being with you children, you follow a good curriculum.

I found that for most of my children's homeschooling lives were spent concentrating on exposing them to knowledge and the last few years have been geared to preparing them for obtaining the piece of paper which will open doors for them post school and entering either the working world or further studies.

If I can be of any assistance It would be a pleasure

Bless you, regards Bev

Vicki - posted on 03/25/2010

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I agree with Laurie. There are pros and cons to home schooling. I, myself, went to a parochial school. Well, I started at the public school, but was too shy. The parochial school had much smaller class sizes, and I did great up through 8th grade. But then it was back to the public school, and although academically I was further ahead, I was still behind in social skills and while I was active in soccer, softball, and volleyball at the smaller school, the coaches didn't know me or my skill levels and already had their "favorites" from previous years.
I have several friends who home school. One has several kids and lives on a very large and active farming operation. The kids are extremely shy except around the farm workers, who they treat as family. The kids are all smart, but have no social skills.
The successful ones I see are the ones who combine home schooling with public school. Get them into social situations, community sports, field trips, music classes, etc. so they know kids from "both worlds." You still have control over their experiences and what they learn, but they develop the social skills they need should the time come to integrate them into public school. Know your limits too. If you aren't strong in a subject (English or math, for instance), let them take that at a public school. One of our church friends' kids is now going to college after having been home-schooled, and they've found out that his writing education was poorly lacking, and now he's really struggling. So, know when you've done as much as you can, and then turn it over to someone who excels in that area.
Good luck!

Laurie - posted on 03/24/2010

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Home schooling is trial and error! 1. You have to be committed. 2. You must let the child/children know you are more than just mommy, you are teacher also. 3. There is no room for error when it comes to " the dog ate my homework!" 4. You have to be firm but not mean! 5. Do a planner...ie: take field trips, have recess, make home schooling fun for both you and the student(s). 6. Plan and have a nutritional fun luch and snack. 7. Have music class w/ sing along. 8. If you are christian oriented family have prayer to start the day. It helps!

Maricel - posted on 03/24/2010

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I HIGHLY APPRECIATE YOUR TIME! GIVING ME ALL THESE FEEDBACKS...I AM LEARNING A LOT FROM ALL OF YOU...THANKS AGAIN AND GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

Tammy - posted on 03/24/2010

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I have had 4 children through school, christian and public. As long as they see morals at home I think they will be fine, but it is totally true about who they are around is how they act.

Jennifer - posted on 03/24/2010

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I think it depends on how you feel. If you feel the Lord is calling you to home school then i encourage you to follow that call. I was public schooled but my husband was home schooled and the amazing difference between our views are massive. I learned quickly that I had been indoctrinated in many ways through our school system to think our country was bad and to challenge God's laws while my husband was able to learn our country's history without attempts to indoctrinate and his education solidified his Christian morals.

I have seen first hand some failures in home school but with the kind of support system you have set up i highly doubt you will incur any of that.

Home school allows for us to individualize our children's education around their need to learn their way. My husband is a kinesthetic learner and was able to really excel in school with a lot of hands on learning.

No one knows our kids the way we know them and who better to educate our kids than the people who love them more than anything in this world?

Lisa - posted on 03/23/2010

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Home Schooling or Public School neither is Right or wrong. You just have to pray and find out what the Lord wants you to do for your children. I made the decision each year. I have 8 kids 18 -4. I home schooled my oldest until she was in 6th grade. I wouldn't trade those years for anything. My youngest 3/4 have/will started in public school. The younger ones have done fine in public school. The teenagers I am constantly battling attitudes. The important thing is what you teach them at home whether or not you home school. Another thing to check in to is Charter Schools. They are publicly funded, but generally smaller, and more parent involvement.

Elizabeth - posted on 03/23/2010

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I kept mine home one year and put them in school one year they did well in both places. My boy wants to be home-schooled next year, but my girl is very social and would like to continue in public school. In the long run I think it depends on the child's personality. The trials of youth may be harder, but If they face the trials they have the oportunity to grow and witness. If they are to sheltered they will feel traped and run hard and fast when the door opens. Either way God's word says you should,"train up a child in the way he should go and when he is OLD he will not depart from it." That is what matters most I think.

Maricel - posted on 03/23/2010

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thanks for the reply! i greatly appreciate it...i'm still torn but you both have a good point and KIM that idea is great...i do want them to be in school and have that experience...you did a great job...SHANNON...i feel you on that..i'm the same way...although i know that we can learn how to be more patient..but at the moment i'm losing it quick...i guess it really depends how God is gonna lead us financially and spiritually of course...I'll be praying for you..there are a lot of good public schools out there...thanks to both of you and GOD bless you and your family!

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I'm in the same boat. Only, I KNOW I can't home school. It's just not in me. I'm not patient or disciplined enough. We are sending ours to public school with LOTS of prayer & faith that God will take care of her. ♥

Kim - posted on 03/22/2010

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My daughter is ten now, but for the first few years of her being in school, I home schooled her. I was torn because I didn't want her to miss the opportunity to have that school experience and make friends but I was very worried about the world outside of the safe little world I created in my home. After she got older I realized I am trying to do the best I can as far as being a mother and a soldier of God and I have planted that seed of love for God in my child so hopefully she will do the right thing. Now she's in private school and she loves it. So maybe for the first few years you may want to homeschool. I recently went back to college and Jessyca and I sit at the kitchen table and do our homework together.

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