Nikki - posted on 12/26/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )
265
68
I have been on COM for a while now and I have been paralyzed with animosity over the fact my son's father abandoned him as all my posts reflect !! I just couldn't let the anger go for so long as I hurt FOR my son and it showed :( I wanted to share with all the Moms , I finally prayed enough about it and finally the Lord lifted the burden of "anger". Amen :) I feel so blessed the Lord heard my prayer as it was eating me alive and not healthy for me or my son. I know the Lord knows my heart and He knows where my son's father is and He will take care of my son and I no matter what. I can only pray for my son's father . Period. End of it . As I am human and I will have times I still "hurt" for my son when he asks about his father , I know that now the weight has been given to God and for this I am so happy :) Now I can concentrate 100% on my son and live and let live. I no longer have to be angry with my husband and I accept he wants no part of his son's life. God knows he does not pay child support and does not care for his son but that is between him and God, not me . Looking back , I can't believe I held on to the anger for so long. I pray to God to help him , forgive him as he has forgiven me for all my sins in this life and to hopefully change his heart about his child if it is His will . I have written him a letter to ensure he knows I do not stand in his way ever of seeing his child if the day ever presents itself that he may desire to do so :) Yes , it was a bit hard to do but my son loves his father so much and their relationship or lack of has nothing to do with me . In fact , I feel his father somehow "justified" his actions because he knew I held animosity towards him so it was "easy" for him to simply ignore our son . Sad but true , however that is no longer the case and God knows I am sincere in my effort to forgive :) Amen :) I always go back to the scripture about how we must forgive in order to be forgiven :) So true .... I hope all of you are doing well and had a wonderful Christmas , I did :) Thanks for allowing me to share . God Bless, Nikki Nixon-Witt
2 Comments
View replies by