K's - posted on 09/19/2010 ( 32 moms have responded )
Here's the story. I am here under a suedo name. I am 28 and the mother of a wonderful 9 month old baby, married to a wonderful husband, have a good family (with the occasional family drama). Basically nothing should be wrong in my life! About 4 weeks ago I was put on anxiety medicine welbutrin 150 XL, After 3 weeks my dr. up'd my dose to 300. A couple of days after that is when I feel like my anxiety got worse. So I went back down to 150mg. I have always believed in God, and in heaven, and am a religious person. But for about a week now, I have been wondering what is going to happen to me when I die. I know that we will all die one day, but all of a sudden, it's like i realized i am not going to be around forever. Where am I going to go? Will God be there to help me? Will I meet all of my loved ones? Will there even be an afterlife? or will I cease to exist?? This is on my mind 24/7 except when I'm sleeping. I still function during the day, but in everything I do, wonder, why? what's the point? none of this will matter when I die. I have had several terrible painic attacks. I am too young to be thinking like this. I don't want to miss out on my life, my daughter's life, or my life with my husband. I don't want to think like this! I have talked to my husband, who has suggested going back and talking to my dr. I'm not sure, could uping the dose on my medication be causing this? I've been reading my bible, and have gone to church looking for an answer, all I know is it's a terrible feeling and any help you could offer would be greatly appreciated.