When adult children turn away from faith

Tammy - posted on 08/06/2011

Linda, my heart goes out to you! I am in the same boat basically. It's a long story, but the whole family was hurt terribly by a church we attended as the kids grew up. We left the church when our oldest had graduated, but the 2 boys were Jr's, and Freshman in HS. It was very tough for all of us, as we loved this church as part of our family. We did our own "church" at home for awhile, then found another one we liked. However the boys never felt like they fit in with the youth group. Sometimes they did things with their former youth group, but basically they quit going to church all together. I was so afraid it would pull them away from God. Our daughter stayed strong in her faith and found her own church to go to. Both boys did lose their faith along the way, but one has come back. Our oldest son joined the Army and married a young lady who was raised Muslim for 12 yrs, then Mormon. She was an agnostic and so my son decided he was too. However, over the years, I have continued to tell them I am praying for them, sharing what God is doing in our lives, etc. Now they ask me to pray for things and after living with us for almost 3 yrs., I think they are coming around.
So my answer to you is, continue to be yourself in the Lord, continue talking about what He is doing in your life and continue praying for them. I would also be honest with your daughter and let her know you are disappointed in their decision, but you still love and support her. Hopefully, as the wedding plans come together God will work on their hearts and allow some "religious" things in their ceremony. God does miracles through prayer!! I will pray for you my friend, and hope through your example, your daughter will come back to her roots and her future husband will find Jesus!!

Alisha - posted on 08/05/2011

Keep up your witness when you are around them! That is going to be tough! It is so sad when adults think they don't need God anymore and I can't imagine what you are going through. areyouagoodperson.com and the way of the master are both great websites to encourage you. I also really like Nancy Leigh DeMoss, she may have some sermons on her website that would be uplifting to you. I think you will have to be patient for the Lord to soften both of their hearts but you can always in gentle ways teach them how great our God is and that He loves both of them, just be careful not to be too pushy. Pray like crazy!

Paula - posted on 08/03/2011

I will pray for you. We had raised all of our Children in Church and 3 are serving God. One says he is still A Christen but is really really out of his will. My husband prays for him to come to him knees...and it has been working slowly. I would just "love her like Jesus". As they say what would Jesus do. Love her be there for her and remember...Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go;even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Carla - posted on 02/21/2011

Thanks, sweetheart, back at ya !

Linda - posted on 02/21/2011

All the time!

Thanks, again, Carla, for helping me hold onto that. I now count you as one of my angels. :)

Carla - posted on 02/21/2011

Isn't God good?

Linda - posted on 02/20/2011

Thank you, very much, Ladies, for your concern and support. I am very happy to report that my daughter contacted me today and told me that she and her fiance have decided to have a clergymember officiate at their wedding, after all. Truly an answer to my prayers! God good!

Linda - posted on 02/19/2011

Thanks, Doris. I do appreciate your support. My prayer, however, is that the Lord will open both their hearts. I want salvation for both of them, not just my daughter.

Doris - posted on 02/19/2011

*praying that God allows you to break your ankle* sorry

Doris - posted on 02/19/2011

I love what Claire said and you might add Jeremiah 31:17 to that . I read a book once called It's My Turn by Ruth Bell Graham.And I don't know if you are familiar with Franklin Graham ( Billy Graham's Son),but he was quite the rebel .At one time in his life he would not go to Church because he wanted to ride his Motorcycle.And his Mother began to pray.One day she went up to him and said "I am praying to break your ankle so that you can't ride your Motorcycle .He laughed .But not to much longer ,as he was riding ,his foot hit a tree root ,and broke . I thought,how interesting. When we pray something that is God's will,He will back us up all the way. I would venture to say that the man your daughter is going to marry might not be God's will as we are not to be unevenly yolked together with an unbeliever .I'm just suggesting that if it were me.I would be praying God stop the wedding and send her a Godly man . That is just my opinion and you can take it or leave it of corse . Faith is believing in what is humanly impossible .But all things are possible with God.

Carla - posted on 02/16/2011

You're welcome, honey. Raising older children is more difficult than little ones. You can kiss boo-boos and make them feel better, but all you can do with your older ones is stand back and pray. Mine are 44,42 and 37--and I STILL cry and pray over them. Being a parent is a lifetime vocation!

God bless, honey

Linda - posted on 02/15/2011

Thank you, so much, Carla. Your response has brought tears to my eyes. Your advice is similar to what I am receiving from others. I know there is nothing I can do to change Rachel's heart. My prayer is that God will touch her and that she will find her way back to Him.
Thank you, and thanks be to God!

Carla - posted on 02/15/2011

Sweetie, it's heart-rending when your children grow up and consider old-fashioned and passe the things we hold dear.

All you can do is pray for them, Linda. Deuteronomy says 'raise up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart'. If you have raised this child to the very best of your ability, if you have imparted Christian values into her, they ARE in there. She may not want anything to do with them NOW, but when the time is right, she will pull them out of the dark recesses and put them to use. We take this as a personal affront, but it really isn't. As a matter of fact, this is how I learned how good God was, by walking away and finding NOTHING but misery out in the world. I RAN back! Now God has a child who is absolutely certain that there isn't anything I want more than Him. I don't wonder if I made the right decision, I don't miss anything the world has to offer.

As for her ceremony, I assume a justice of the peace will preside? That's okay. Her marriage is legal, leave the rest to a Big God, Who has her in the palm of His hand. Pray hard, love her hard.

God bless, honey