I can't belive she said that...in front of my famiy and friends!!!

Tanya - posted on 02/06/2009 ( 13 moms have responded )

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Hello ladies!

Welcome to the CRAZY IN LAWS group!! I can't wait to read your stories and please feel free to rant about your in laws ( I like to call them outlaws), parents, that "know it all friend"...whoever! Just get it out of your system!!

Over the past three years, I've encountered some horrible issues regarding my mother in law. We had a good relationship for 10 years until my sweet daughter rejected grandma at 5 months old (still continues..my child is 3 now). That was my fault, of course!

My mil is a very loud and aggressive person who likes to be heard...center of attention type! My father in law is the opposite...go figure! Of course, my daughter loves grandpa which makes things even worse. Is grandma jealous?? Heck yeah!

Have you ever witnessed a grown woman (the outlaw) guilt tripping a toddler because the toddler gave all her favorite toys to grandpa? I have...blah!! It's sad!

Have you witnessed your outlaw having a full blown tantrum in front of your children because the outlaw didn't get their way? Oh yeah!!

What about the you didn't experience real labor like I did comments? Excuse me??? Ahhh...did you just say that in front of my family? Someone get my boots...butt kicking has just begun!

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Tanya - posted on 02/25/2009

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OMG Ally!! You and I share some similar issues! Many OOXX's your way! Your mil is extremely selfish in my opinion!! Like nobody wants to hear the mil talking on the cell phone during delivery and subjecting distasteful comments. That's disrespectful...period! Someone grab the woman by the ear and throw her out the door! Children have better manners then your mil. Blah Blah Blah :)

Ally - posted on 02/24/2009

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this is by far my favorite group ever!!! I don't even know where i would stat as I can relate to almost all of these stories. I truly believe i married into people from another planet. I too have the center of attention ...i cannot belive she said that mil!! at my baby shower she started talking then yelling about how she had a condom in her purse( which of course she didn't) and then asked if maybe i needed it!! i was mortified. then EVERY present i opened (not just hers) she proceeded to tell a story about how my husband at some point in time had something just like that. then she told the same exact store word for word in a span of 40 min and it was about how she used to soak my husbands cloth diapers in the toilet? wtf?? i was absolutely mortified! she carries on everywhere we go ...talks about me behind my back like the second i leave the room she literally whispers to my husband or when we go for walkstogether which is rare she pulls my husband back and whispers and laughs and then when i ask why she says oh nothing! She lives 5 min away and came to see my daughter 2 times in the times by the time she was 2 months old...and then on my first mothers day we invited her to a brunch for her me my mom and my grandma and aunt...she told my husband that that is not what she wanted to do and would be no part of it and that i was not his mother and he needed to make damn sure she made it special for her and then hung up the phone and wouldnt return our calls for two weeks! i felt like saying Uh news flash lady its not about you anymore!...and refused to tell me happy mothers day! cant is that too much to ask ? she refused to come to the birthday party i threw for my husband at a very nice restaraunt and then didnt even acknolegde mine that year. my husband told me he wated her to be there when my daughter was born since my mom was going to be there so i let her for his sake and it was a disater...not only was she not helpful and was on her cell phone most of the time she is the only one you can hear on the video pf my daughters birth screamin stuf like she loves to be naked...shes gonna be a nudist!! i could literally go on forever! again thanks sooo much for letting me vent !

Lynda - posted on 02/21/2009

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Thank you so much Tanya for the supportive words.  My hubby and I have come to deal with the whole family thing.  The only thing I regret is that my mom isn't here to see my kids.  I know she would just love them to death!!  It's been 9 years since she passed away and It only seems like yesterday.  I sometimes cry because I miss her so much and each passing year it seems to get worse.  I don't know maybe I'm a sap...oh, well.  But thank you again.

Tanya - posted on 02/20/2009

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Oh Lynda! My heart goes out to you! I too have lost both of my parents. Your situation sounds over the top with in laws who are drunks (excuse the term), a know it all sister and having the loss of your own parents. That's sucks! You will find other ladies within this group who face similar issues and with their understanding and support...may it bring you comfort. XOXO

Lynda - posted on 02/12/2009

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My in-laws are dead beats.  They are alcoholics and thought they could free-load off of us once my husband and I moved in together.  Boy were they wrong!!!  My husband did not have a very good up bringing.  The ILs would pack up and leave while my husband was in the bush working and when he came out he could never find them.  They would get rid of all his stuff!  Then when my DH was younger and his dad was in the bush working (and drinking) my mil would be in the bar most of the time drinking.  Social Services came twice to take them away because my DH and his sister were running around town wild.  THEN the ILs had the nerve to tell me how to raise my kids!!!  Ok...that's just the beginning....



I had to be hospitalized and bed riddened with my first son because of High Blood Pressure bordering on Pre-eclampsia.  Then when my son was born he had to be in the NICU for 3 weeks.  In all I was away from home 2 months and 3 hours away from home.  While I was gone, my husband missed a lot of days of work so we did not have much money.  He asked his parents to come and stay with him to keep him company.



Well, when it was time to come home I told my hubby they better be gone because I couldn't deal with a new baby and drunk ILs.  There was nothing in the house to eat.  My ILs ate everything!!!  Not even a slice of bread to make myself breakfast.  I had to go beg my sister for some food!  Ever since then my cupboards have always been full no matter how little money we have.



Ok that's his side, now for my side.  Both my parents have passed away.  I did not have my mom with me when I was going thru the pregnancy, birth and such!  My sister is 9 years older than me and I thought I could rely on her for help....What a Joke!  The only help she gives is her "opinion"....more like do it my way or the highway.  And yup she does the you are a horrible mother thing, but does not come out and say it straight out.  She give her "opinion", but it comes out more accusatory.  THEN, on top of it all she has a 17 year old daughter (youngest of 5...so that's why my sis thinks she knows everything) and she doesn't even know where she is half the time.  I look on my nieces facebook page and there is numerous pics of her partying and being drunk even when she was 15 and my sis has the nerve to think she is the perfect mom!  Oh I could go on.........

Tanya - posted on 02/09/2009

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Having a family is tough enough and as parents, we do what we must to support our babies. Having extra help with your children is one thing but putting up with a heckling mil is AHHHH! LOL OK..here's a thought: Wouldn't it be fun to create a mil duty list (since she's coming to "help" out anyway) and hand it to her as she first arrives at your home? Hmmmmm! LOL March 5th??? I'd agree it's about time! Very exciting!!

Tara - posted on 02/09/2009

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I think I'm going to talk to my doctor before she comes and see if I can be temporarily put back on some form of anti-anxiety medication!  LOL!  If that doesn't pan out maybe I'll just stay in my room!  I do have a lock on the door and a tv & stereo.  :)



Oh, the idea of moving to a warmer climate was something that we had talked casually about over some time.  When I was pregnant I started with the "everything's harder with little ones", "we better do it if we're gonna".  When my daughter was a few months old the company her dad was working for failed, he was having to search for a new job.  I'd been waitressing for years and could get a job within days of being anywhere.  So we sold all the big things, packed 1 car and a trailer, and took the opportunity to 'get out o' Dodge'!  We had enough between selling the other car & the furniture and savings that we were able to get an apartment and furniture and live for about 6 mos.  Luckily, we moved to an area where he found a great job in a few short weeks.  It was an experience and opportunity that I wouldn't take back for anything!



Yes, she is crazy.  I keep trying to tell her son that.  LOL



Two hours away is nice, Australia does sound a little nicer!  ;)



Due?  March 5th.  Or today.  Either would be fine by me.  LOL

Tanya - posted on 02/09/2009

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Tara that's nuts!! How are you going to survive the week? And how did you convince your husband to move a few states away? Sounds dreamy! Putting a 3 yr old on a plane alone??? Hahahaha Is she crazy? My in laws live 2 hours away and I'm soooo grateful...However the thoughts of moving to Australia did cross my mind!! :)
PS When are you expecting???

Tara - posted on 02/08/2009

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Did I mention that this woman thinks I'm gonna put a three year old on a trip alone to see her?!!

Tara - posted on 02/08/2009

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OMG!  What stories you share!  I'm lucky that my stories have become limited since I convinced my man that we needed to move a few states away!  LOL!  She still lets us know how to raise our daughter and what names we should be choosing for our baby to come, but she's not in the living room talking about me while I'm a few feet into the kitchen getting her a coke!  I got the worst news about a week ago, she's coming to visit after the baby's born.  A whole week of "this is what I did" - "this is what you should do"!  She was NOT the type of mother that anyone would have praised for ANYTHING, so I'm not sure where she gets off thinking she's better than anyone.  I dread having to go around the intire house for weeks before she comes to lessen her amunition, and just after having a baby!  Ugh! 

Tanya - posted on 02/08/2009

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OMG! Like you wouldn't know any details about your own labor and delivery! A close friend of mine had a lovely situation in the delivery room. She made it very clear that her husband was the only one allowed in but the mil was determined to be in that room. Not only did the mil invade the delivery room as my friend was in the stages of pushing...she brought her friends too. Can you believe it?? Here's my friend with her bottom exposed for all to see as the mil gathered her friend's around to watch the "performance". What' worse..my friend didn't know who these people? It's like break out the popcorn and bring in the freaks already! LOL

Jolene - posted on 02/07/2009

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They all seem to be crazy! Both my sisters and my friends with children all say the same things. I don't know what their deal is. My relationship was good as well, untill a couple months before I gave birth. My warning sign of craziness started when all of the sudden she was buying a carseat for her own vehicle, and all sorts of supplies for her own home. I think she must have assumed that I was just gonna dump my baby off with her every chance I got to go out and party or something. Tell me why I would want to leave my baby with someone who lies, doesn't display any common sense as to saftey and cleanliness with a child, and who ignores me whenever I try to tell her something about what my daughter will not like?

And as for you having gotten the "real labor like I did" comments. Before I gave birth, I told her I was not going to get an epidural. She laughed and said "ya alright!" then I was asked by her husband If I had a preference for what doctor deliverd. I said no. Then she pipes up "oh well I hope it's so and so...shes an anesthesiologist" I'm thinking are you freakin kidding me!? She must have had this idea I was too much of a baby to not have one. (I didn't have one so I had a laugh at that). Then she tries to tell me how long my labor was and how long I pushed for. I think I would know better then you, I was the one doing it!

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