90 days of no sex?

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/14/2011 ( 57 moms have responded )

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A spin - how many of you could really handle 90 days without sex? Didn't this debate topic make you want to jump on the nearest stranger? :)

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Jodi - posted on 06/14/2011

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I went about 10 months after my divorce. I wasn't crawling up ceilings at all, I had too much other shit to sort out. So that's probably why it didn't bother me too much at the time. But generally? 90 days is WAY too long.

Charlie - posted on 06/14/2011

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Longest I have gone is 9 weeks after birth , I get a little cranky if I don't get my lovin' LOL which is hard between kids and my fiancee working nights but we make it work , we did however do it all the time during pregnancy because I my sex drive was through the roof anyway if for some strange occurance there were a rip in the space time continuum and we had to wait 90 days with no sex I would have self serve .

Sara I hear from some other ladies that omega 3 fish oil helps the female libido !

Krista - posted on 06/14/2011

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Wimps. ;) After my ex-fiance and I broke up, I went over a year without sex. In retrospect, it was good. I was not in any sort of emotional state to be doing that sort of thing.

Paulette - posted on 06/17/2011

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I'm at 3yrs 6months with only self help. My son is 3yrs and his father and I broke up when he was 4 months..but stop having sex when I was around 3months pregnant. He said making love to me pregnant made him feel strange. He also thought because I was an older mom it would jeopardize the pregnancy. I was pretty depressed at the time and still am..so not ready yet to get into another relationship right now..but I do enjoy some phone bone with a guy that is way cool..(lol) when the feelings get to intense. He keeps telling me he loves me..but since we've only met online for a year...I find it unusual that he loves me...and of course I'm always thinking what influence I want in my sons life.

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Elizabeth - posted on 06/21/2011

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I dont think that i could make it that long. Even with toys it is just not the same, but i dont think i would jump a stranger. If i was involved i would give in to what ever reason i was holdin out and if not im sure i could find someone to take care of it that i knew

[deleted account]

Jennifer, During pregnancy and for about the year after i lost my sex drive pretty much all together :( My baby was 9 months when my ex walked out and i had just started to get it back. Now it's back in full swing and i'm frustrated as hell!

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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Yeah I was a morning sex lady, we would do it like every other day or more! Then came Eric, now no time for morning sex as he wakes me up every morning so early. And now add in Fierna and I'm up somewhere between 4-5 am every day! No fun and no where near sex!
I miss morning sex. :( I hope it all comes back once our kids are older. But we want 4 so there's a while to go yet. Afternoon nap is when we usually make it work but now with Fierna it's tricky cuz she isn't the best sleeper......
Ah well, it will be better in a few months when I'm sleeping better!

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/17/2011

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Yeah that sucks. I told my boyfriend to start waking me up in the middle of the night. Like after 4 hours of sleep. Maybe try that Jennifer? lol and tell him what you need - to be rubbed, touched more as it puts you in the mood. Make him do it :P

Jenni - posted on 06/17/2011

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We've only been together for 4 years. He is always willing but he's always been the type to wait for me to make the first moves. I think childbirth affected my libido a lot but I'm pretty much always willing, I just need a little 'umph' to get me in the mood. But i'm not too worried about it now. Things are slowly getting back to normal!

Bah, I'm too tired for night sex, I think that's the problem. I'm not in the mood at night. I love morning sex! But when your kiddies are your alarm clock, it makes it pretty difficult.

[deleted account]

@ Jennifer T. - No secret, my hubby's just always ready, willing and waiting for me to be ready :)



We've been together for 5 years and married for 4, so maybe we're still kinda in the newlywed stages? Or maybe it's because our youngest is 2 now and I'm getting more sleep...

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/17/2011

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Yeah, the baby phase is just....... deadly. Period. You lose sleep, the ability to match colors and do more than eat frozen foods and wear sweat pants, I swear. I'm due with another one in 2 months just when my 1 is starting to be easier.......... and I'm like please, no more babies........ lol

I am so tired. I think that's the hardest part for me now

Jenni - posted on 06/17/2011

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@Holly- You guys are definitely lucky! That was us *before* kids, maybe even higher. But now we're lucky to get in a good shag once a week. *boo* What's your secret? lol

I was one of those women where my libido greatly declined after childbirth. With my son it started coming back when he was a year old and now that my daughter is a year old it's finally going back to normal, YAH US! :)

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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90 days no sex, fine no problem, but id likely need a hj or to help myself sometime in there.
I probably have a strong sex drive about twice a month, but we have sex like twice a week anyways. Matt would like twice a day so it's a compromise ;)

Jane - posted on 06/17/2011

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My husband was ill and disabled for more than 10 years, so you do the math.

Sometimes all you need is someone to say they appreciate what you do for them.

[deleted account]

Getting the updates to this thread is frustrating! ;p Damn it, like i said though it's more of wanting what i can't have.

[deleted account]

Damn... 90 whole days? Jeeze... I don't know if I (or hubby) could do it! We have sex 6-7 times a week (not days, 'cause sometimes we get in more than one time a day...). Sometimes it's more, very rarely it's less :) I'm just lucky I guess :)

I think if I told my hubby no sex for 90 days he'd think it was a joke and jump me... Now that I'm thinking about it... ::insert evil grin here:: I think it's time for bed... lol

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/16/2011

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Lol wow. I don't know how my sex drive will be again after not being pregnant for 2 years straight. I'm hoping this is the last pregnancy, 2 boys, can I please just be done?! :D

Rosie - posted on 06/16/2011

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i went for approximately 17 months while pregnant and for a while after my first child. his dad left when i was around 10 weeks and we hadn't had sex for a while and i had sex again when he was 10 months old.
i've never had an incredible sex drive so while that long of a time did bother the fuck out of me, 90 days isn't shit, lol.

Debbi - posted on 06/16/2011

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I was about to say the same thing Candi :) Haven't seen my husband since the middle of January. Coming home in 18 days though..

Candi - posted on 06/16/2011

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I've done it. My husband has deployed so many times and I have no choice but to go without.

Brittany - posted on 06/16/2011

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Oh jeez...if we tried to go 90 days I would go crazy...we have sex at least 4-5 times a week...trying to go that long without it would just about kill us both! We have a very healthy sex life despite the strain babies have put on it. After having our 2 kids my body had changed A LOT...I couldn't handle some of the more...exciting things we used to do. For a long time I thought we were doomed, then we started using our creativity and we're back to how it was pre-babies! It's great!

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/15/2011

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Watch out boys, she'll chew you up. She's dangerous :)

love that song.....

Ummmmmm I am very much an animal in every day life hah

I feel exactly the same way Laura. Very hard being in a relationship and struggling in that area. It's made me sit down and wonder sometimes. Daydream about the good old days of just being able to 'go out with the girls' and meet some random idiot where it's all happy tingly at first when you get together...... -daydreams again-

Laura - posted on 06/15/2011

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I have gone even longer without sex. It is frustrating to go that long without sex because your in a relationship and I guess you can say its expected, so when you don't get it its like a slap in the face. I usually end up taking care of my own business if I may be so blunt ladies. But I must say when the time does come to have sex watch out I'm like an animal....lol

[deleted account]

I'm not married anymore. No 'ouch' needed about it. It's just a simple fact of life (mine at least). Chances are good that I'll never marry again (though it's not 100% impossible), so my sex life involving another person is most likely over. No biggie. ;)

[deleted account]

:) 3.5 years and counting. :)



Oh, while IN marriage.... 6 months w/out intercourse (though he got pleasured 'other' ways) was the longest cuz I was on bedrest for the last 3 months of pregnancy w/ the girls and didn't stop bleeding for about 3 months after birth.

September - posted on 06/15/2011

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Um I can hardly wait a couple of days much less 90! Holy cow I would be a total bitch without dick! :)

[deleted account]

I can't go a day without sex, when my husband and I were separated it was hell!, we were separated for two weeks. I ended up having to masturbate.

Amber - posted on 06/15/2011

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@ Sharon~ I didn't mean your particular situation. I meant when there is no medical reason and your partner is saying no. Sorry if it didn't come out right.

@Nichole, that's exactly what I'm talking about! It's miserable!

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/15/2011

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Definiatly, Amber. I felt so degraded unattractive and worthless when he started to get weird about me being pregnant :( expecially if they straight go 'don't want to do it anymore' instead of talking about it and working on other things..

[deleted account]

Thanks Amber, but this was a decision that hubby & I mutually agreed to. ANYTHING that would save the pregnancy. I knew I had a shortened cervix that eventually had to be stitched shut. Hubby didn;t lack for anything-trust me. We did not refuse each other-just no intercourse. And I wasn;t needing or craving it in the least bit. With a progesterone deficiency, you lose sex drive anyway. It was not an issue for us.

Amber - posted on 06/15/2011

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@Sharon~ I think it's more mental than physcial when you're refused sex during pregnancy and want it. It makes you feel....idk, busted, broken? Not sure how to explain it.

[deleted account]

Intercourse was not an option for me during pregnancy. But there were other ways for pleasure & intimacy ;-) Plus I honestly have no problem at all if hubby resorts to porn. Hell, I'll watch it with him!

Amber - posted on 06/15/2011

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If I had to, I supposed I could....but it wouldn't be by choice :)
Chad was weird about pregnancy sex too, so I was cut off basically from the get go. I went 7 months with nothing, then the 6 (ok, maybe 5) weeks after. I hated it...and him for it. It's a wonder we haven't had another one, huh?

Although, thinking about it, I go longer between boyfriends than I do in relationships. I have to want somebody for it to be difficult to not have it ;) I couldn't refrain from toys or anything for that long though.

April - posted on 06/15/2011

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i could if i absolutely HAD to (like a medical condition so severe that sex could literally kill my husband) , but i wouldn't want to! i like knowing my husband still wants me. i might worry that he didn't find me attractive anymore if we went that long!

Jenni - posted on 06/15/2011

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Awwww Emma, I feel for ya! We never quite made it to the 6 week mark after both of my pregnancies. It was more like 5 weeks. :S

Stifler's - posted on 06/14/2011

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I could not. I can't actually go a week. it's been 2 weeks and 'm climbing the walls and I have no idea how I lasted 8 weeks when I had Logan.

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/14/2011

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Toys. Mail order, online, brown box sent to house.. no one will ever know its hiding place in a dark drawer somewhere........ mmmmmmmmmm :)

[deleted account]

Well as i'm currently sitting a little past that i'm kinda going batty :( I guess for me it's just wanting what i can't have.

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/14/2011

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Aaaaah. Well that works. I feel that way the second time around, the new boy is sitting lower so..... it's really awkward.

Totally unrelated : I almost killed my boyfriends sex drive by telling him about a tidbit I read in a baby book - they have seen infants pop woodies IN THE WOMB. Yay - I have a penis inside of me AND it may be excited?! I feel violated. I hope you appreciate what we go through for you...... little men.

Kate CP - posted on 06/14/2011

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Well at first I was really upset about it but after we tried it a couple of times I found out that it really didn't feel good to have sex while I was pregnant. I just felt swollen and sore everywhere (including my cooter) and I just didn't want to be touched. :P

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/14/2011

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I think it would have been cool to have the pregnancy fetish thing. It was so stressful to me when he was weird about me being pregnant I wished he wasn't. I can't imagine what you went through Kate!!!!!!!! I would have bought a SET of toys

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/14/2011

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Hehe, my boyfriend started to get really weird about the last trimester. I mean, we went from normal to not being able to fit in the shower together either, so I don't blame him but it was haaaaaaaaaaaard to get through some days... told him I need toooooooys lol so we finally worked through it. :)

Lady Heather - posted on 06/14/2011

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Oh, this time I am insatiable. I don't know what the difference is. My husband is more than happy to help me out. Pregnancy fetish.

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I wanted it more during pregnancy. I don't think I could have gone the whole pregnancy without!

Kate CP - posted on 06/14/2011

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I went over a year without it because my husband didn't like the idea of having sex with a pregnant lady. :P

Johnny - posted on 06/14/2011

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I've done it before between relationships. I was quite depressed after my long time college boyfriend (5 years) ended up in the psych ward and then decided he was gay. It was a bit of a blow. I probably went at least 18 months before I even thought about sex. I'd be a bit squirrely, but I'd survive. As long as the reason was good & my partner & I had good communication about our situation.

√v^√v^√♥ - posted on 06/14/2011

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Sara..... normal? Perhaps not. I notice I'm a lot tighter after delivery. Sometimes things change. It is awkward for us for a while. So maybe not.

Lady Heather - posted on 06/14/2011

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Last time I was pregnant I went 8 months plus 6 weeks after she was born and I did not care a bit. Ha.

[deleted account]

After this last baby I wanted to go that long...my poor husband. I waited until the 6 week mark then we tried it...then it was another 3 weeks before I was ready to attempt again. Will I ever be back to normal???

Jessi - posted on 06/14/2011

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between boyfriends i have waited an average of 2 years since i was 15 and am now 22; that includes doing anything to pleasure myself. it's better every time!

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