David and Richard Pelzer

Nancy - posted on 06/19/2011 ( 19 moms have responded )

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About a year ago I read the book called, "IT" and the two books after this. I have cried for days when I read the book and could not understand how nobody ever stepped in in this situation. David Pelzer was eventually taken by the state...but needless to say, his younger brother was the second on in the line of the abuse and was never rescued. I started Richard his book, "A Brother's Journey, Surviving a Childhood of Abuse" and at the age of sixteen he was finally able to walk away from the abuse at the hands on his mother. I can not understand how a mother can come up with such viscous abuse towards her own children. The things she did to David was horrendous!! Although Richard never had to sleep on a cot in the basement, he did suffer at he hands on her. He too was many times close to death! So many people had known and seen the bruises, the way the kids looked filthy, so thin...and nobody stepped in until it was almost too late!
Be aware...have a strong stomach if you want to read the books. They are not intended for the faint of heart!!
Looking on what the thoughts of you all are on this one!!

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Kellie - posted on 06/20/2011

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It's the bystander effect. Drives me fucking crazy! it really fucks me off that all these assholes can run around popping out kids left right and centre, then they abuse the fuck out of them simply because of their own self worth issues and need for power, and there are beautiful people who would be amazing LOVING parents and can't have children.

FFS!

Lissa - posted on 06/20/2011

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The sight of that book in a bookstore can still bring me to tears. I can no longer read or watch anything that involves child abuse. I stay awake for weeks on end thinking about it and crying, if I see a cover on a book that I suspect may be some awful true story I get whoever I'm with to read the back and tell me whether it is or not, if it is reading the back is enough to upset me so I don't. I never had this extreme reaction until I read a child called It when pregnant

Veronica - posted on 08/19/2012

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i as a mother of children aging from 27 to 14 can tell you that things have changed in the world a lot between having my first child to my last. In the eighties when i had my first child people never talked about abuse on children it was a secret , then when i had my youngest in 1998 people talked about abuse and reported people that did. In the eighties if a child was hungry there were no programs at school , now in 2012 at my daughters school there are breakfast programs and lunch programs open to all students everyone eats. In the eighties family handed down clothes to the younger ones now when your kids out grow their clothes the school hands them on to other students. I read the books by David Pelzer and I believe every word and if he had never written his books and talked about what happened .people I believe would never have changed and realized there is a problem lets try and fix it. I believe we as an society have come a long way from the sixties and seventies we now talk about things we once never would, we try an help were needed and we try are best to watch out for others and when we see a child in need i hope everyone tries to help.

Nicky - posted on 06/20/2011

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they have just started prosecuting people in NZ when abuse is known, but nothing is done, i.e neighbours/family members who have seen something and kept quiet, etc...
i think this is an excellent way forward and shows that the justice system isnt all a big sham.
I dont think I could read those books, Im too emotional as is, but being pregnant again, absolutely no way!
There is so much abuse in the world, and about time that its not just up to the victim to speak up.
When I was pregnant with my first child, I watched a documentary about the forgotten children of Bulgaria, these poor handicapped children, I'll never forget it

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Susan - posted on 12/29/2013

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I read a boy called it I to was upset and asked myself the same thing do people walk around with eyes closed Its hard to believe this was allowed to happen.

Laura - posted on 12/02/2013

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I myself have read all of david's books and just finished reading Richards first one "a brothers journey"....I will be reading his new one "a teenagers journey as soon as I find it. I cannot believe what these boys went through and still came out of it and became wonderful men. Everyone failed these boys, why would no one stand up to her. I understand why they boys didn't, but what about the neighbors, teachers, the father, her mother....this makes me sick. I really don't understand why ALL the boys weren't taken away when david was...that astounds me. Didn't the cops think that if she did those horrible things to him that she did it to all of them. What is wrong with people. David and Richard...you are the most brave guys in the world to deal with that most of your life. I don't know how you made it out without killing her or yourself, but YOU ARE MY HEROS! god bless you both

Kelly - posted on 03/06/2013

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I have nearly finished reading the whole series of "A BOY CALLED IT" "THE LOST BOY" and "THE MAN NAMED DAVE" it was heart breaking to think that any child could be treated like that by their own mother and that their own father just up and left and while researching this on the net was saddened to find out that after Dave had left that his brother also suffered at the hands of their mother, it was deeply upsetting to see that no one looked into the family nor did the authorities ivestigate the other kids after Dave was removed. It was an extremely good book and will be reading Richard's book as soon as i get my hands on it !

April - posted on 06/20/2011

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I have read all of Dave Pelzer's books. It is not just a story about horrific abuse, but it is also a story of a system that failed Dave and his brother. I don't just mean social services, I mean everyone. Other parents, teachers, friends, classmates. People knew or at least suspected, which is the saddest part of all.

Kimberly - posted on 06/20/2011

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i have only read the child called it. my husband was in almost that bad of a situation with his parents.he has diabeties. and there was times his father would use that against him. he went threw so much his body actually had learned its own defence against to high of blood sugar and too low. there was many times either his dad didnt believe he had a problem or told him to suck it up. so when i read the book a child called it my husband may not have gone threw the physical abuse that boy did but i would still put it in the same ball park.

Nancy - posted on 06/20/2011

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Lisa,
She had five boys. David, Richard, Keith, Scott and Ross. David was taken away. Keith was her youngest one so she didn't touch him. Ross was never abused either but left for the Army as soon as he was 18. Scott replaced the father who left and later died. So when David was taken by the State, Richard was her next. Authorities knew what was happen, but it is not like now where child speaks up or it is known that the child is being abuse, you go to jail! So Richard took all the abuse until he was sixteen until he finally stood up to her!!
What is amazing tho, that those two boys are very respective men now who have a loving family of their own. I'm sure it took them years of therapy to come to a point where they were able to move on. David was in Thief River Falls, MN as a speaker of child abuse. My friend said, he voice is still hoarse from all the ammonia his mom fed him!

Lissa - posted on 06/20/2011

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With all the kids that are still being seriously injured or killed, I'm not so sure the times have changed that much :(

Kellie - posted on 06/20/2011

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it makes no sense that it took so long for him to be taken away when EVERYONE around him knew what was happening to him, so no surprises no one gave a fuck after he was eventually taken away.

Those were the times I guess, what happens indoors stays indoors and no said or did a damn thing.

Lissa - posted on 06/20/2011

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I get that Kellie, what I mean is it doesn't make any sense. Someone decides that a child needs to be taken away he is then that's it nothing, no follow up, that makes no sense.

Kellie - posted on 06/20/2011

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Because she was never even investigated Lissa, never investigated, never charged and never punished for what she did to David.

The ONLY reason the school finally stepped in and reported it to the authorities was because David came to school with chemical burns up his arms from her trying to force his head into a bucket of Amonia and he put his arms in it to save himself.

His foster homes were almost as shitty as his real home.

And as for his fucking weak assed father who did fucking NOTHING to help his boy I have NO words for how angry that makes me.

That this man grew into a normal functioning human being who served his country in the air force and not a serial killer is just amazing. He is an amazing human being and I have the utmost respect for him.

As for his brother, my feeling is he was jumping on the money bandwagon, and wanted the world to know that as a child he had no control and that what happened to David wasn't his fault (which of course it wasn't).

Lissa - posted on 06/20/2011

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What I could never fathom about the story was that only David Peltzer was taken away, at the time he was the only one being abused but why were her other boys allowed to stay with her.

Teresa - posted on 06/20/2011

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I have not read the books but hubby and I were having this conversation yesterday and the facts are that people are loathe to get involved any more for fear of retribution by the legal system, etc. When he was a boy, the 50s and 60s, if a child was being abused, a neighbor or family stepped in and let the parents know that if they abused their child again, the neighbors/family/friends would be there to "abuse" them with a baseball bat and see how they liked it. At the same time, the government really stayed out of family matters and there was little recourse for abused children so the community was left to deal with it. I am not sure if this applies in the case of these poor brothers. I am not excusing that nobody did anything. Someone should have most certainly.

Nicky - posted on 06/20/2011

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I agree Lissa, it was hard to grasp, and then you become a mother and it is just completely no-go zone.
There is far too much child abuse in my country, and it is so sad to hear about on the news, especially when that child is around the age of yours. so depressing

Melissa - posted on 06/19/2011

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Whenever I see a story or a movie based on a true story about child abuse I always take the time to read it. I ALWAYS end up bawling my eyes out and rushing to hug my son, but I feel like I owe it to the children to hear their stories and give them my thoughts, prayers, the love and emotion they didn't get when they were either alive or going through it all.

A few years ago I read a story about a woman who was in a correctional facility. It was back probably about 30 or 40 years ago, and it was low security; I don't remember her crime, but she wasn't a murderer or anything like that. She would sneak out every night and see her boyfriend, and go back before the guards could find her gone. She ended up getting pregnant, and the legal system basically tricked her boyfriend into signing over his rights, so when she refused to do so, they told her the father already had, and since she was a ward of the state, she had no choice but to hand over her child. Her son was adopted by a woman who already had a son of her own, he was about a year older than this little boy, and she abused him every single day of his life. After his birth mother got out of jail she began searching for her son. She found him after about 4 years, but it was too late; his adoptive mother had already killed him. While on trial, a friend of the adoptive mother told everyone about a time where the little boy had been sick; he couldn't have been more than a year, but his adoptive mother was feeding him, and he kept gagging. She told him if he threw up, she'd make him eat his own vomit. He did, and she did. In the end, the little boy died because he was riding his tricycle down the hallway, and she kicked him down the basement stairs. I cried for SO LONG after that story.

I read another story a few days ago about a three year old little girl who's mother was a meth addict. Her boyfriend would literally tie the little girls arms across her chest, and then tie her legs up, making her almost into a pretzle, and they'd leave her in the bedroom for hours, sometimes days while they had "meth parties". When she cried or begged him to stop, he'd beat her. Her mother never did anything to stop him, and he threatened any friends who tried to help her or stop him that if they told the authorities, he'd have them killed. This all started when the two started dating when the little girl was about 2; through out the following year the little girl was taken from her mother and put in the custody of her grandmother. Her birth father was in the military and sometimes went overseas, so he couldn't have full custody. Every time she had visitation with her mother, she came home with injuries. Still, for whatever reason, a social worker decided that it was "unknown" who her abuser was, and returned her to the care of her mother. The little girl was found dead 3 days before her father returned from overseas.

I'll never understand how ANYONE can harm a child; whether it's theirs or not. I do understand there are people out there who don't want children, or can't handle children, but hasn't anyone heard of adoption?? And for the adoptive parents out there abusing and killing their children, WHY ADOPT??? Do they really feel that crappy about themselves that they have to beat up on innocent, defenseless little children to feel better about themselves?? It's sick and disgusting. No child should ever have to hurt at the hands of ANYONE, but ESPECIALLY someone who is supposed to love and protect them. It makes me sick to my stomach every time :0(

Elfrieda - posted on 06/19/2011

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I read one of those books when I was pregnant, and the tears were streaming down my face. I have gotten way more sensitive to kids in danger since my son was born, so there's no way I'm reading it now! Too horrible to think about.

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