do you let your child have SIPS of your

Kelsey - posted on 07/09/2012 ( 82 moms have responded )

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I read an article about an Arizona mom who put beer in her child's sippy cup and a restaurant and a table of on lookers called the police and she was arrested and charged. I was just wondering what everyone thought about this. I have a 3 year old daughter and I have let her take sips of wine and beer because most children*and adults* do not like the taste. I do not however allow my child to taste sips of coolers or anything mixed with pop because it is sweet and tastes just like juice most of the time. NOTED*** IM NOT TALKING ABOUT ALLOWING MY 3 YEAR OLD TO DRINK A WHOLE GLASS AND GET DRUNK OFF IT. A SIP IS DIFFERENT FROM A "DRINK"

http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2012/07...

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Consuming alcoholic beverages is part of my families culture as well. I was taught at a very young age to drink responsibly, and that the purpose of drinking is not to "get plastered" (a concept entirely unfamiliar to way too many people). I do drink in front of my child, but at this time (he's 7) he is NOT allowed to taste it. He knows it is a grown-up drink that he will learn about when he is ready.



In my state, it is legal for legal guardians to serve their own teenaged child alcohol in their own home, and I do intend to let J taste and drink it when he is 17 or 18 so that I can be sure he learns to drink responsibly under my supervision, rather than getting sloshed at a bush party the first time his lips touch a beer bottle. Not everyone agrees with that, and that's alright. That said, I still think toddlerhood, and even childhood are a bit too early for even a sip.



You said yourself that most children don't like it, so why do you wish to give it to your child? Why not wait until they do enjoy it, and teach them to do so responsibly?

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/09/2012

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Never rub brandy or any form of alcohol on your baby's gums; alcohol is poisonous to infants.



http://www.homeocan.ca/main.cfm?p=03_110...



What not to do:



DO NOT tie a teething ring or any other object around your child's neck.

DO NOT place anything frozen against your child's gums.

NEVER cut the gums to help a tooth grow in, because this can lead to infection.

Avoid teething powders.

NEVER give your child aspirin or place it against the gums or teeth.

DO NOT rub alcohol on your baby's gums.




http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/...



Do not rub your baby's gums with alcohol, however. Alcohol is not safe for your baby and it will not treat the pain or decrease the swelling.



http://www.livestrong.com/article/521292...



Yep, I don't think it is a good idea to rub any form of alcohol on your baby's gums. That is a very old thing to do and has been proven to be dangerous. Kinda like smoking and/or drinking while pregnant. Back in the day, it was acceptable and many woman did it but now that there have been real data linking these things to dangers, it is frowned upon.

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/20/2012

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LOL - sorry but alcohol is NOT good for children. End of story. I can say you are most definitely NOT going to win any points for giving it to your underage children. Have fun with that. ;)

There is a reason you need ID to purchase alcohol at a legal age. It is absurd that people give their children alcohol. I mean, would you give them a smoke too? Why not? Did you know alcohol actually affects the body in worse ways than tobacco?

BTW - Normal children's medicine does NOT have alcohol in it. Perhaps reading the ingredients would help you understand this.

Jen - posted on 07/11/2012

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My 3year old son has tasted wine once when hubby & I were sharing a bottle. When I was growing up, I had cousins who were always allowed a sip of their dad's beer at home - probably also as young as 3. I tried beer (without my mom's knowledge) when I was about 12 and didn't like it, though I did my fair share of underage drinking in college. So I am NOT claiming it's realistic that every single person in the country is going to wait until age 21 to taste alcohol for the first time.
However, from the viewpoint of having worked in restaurants for close to 20 years... If I saw a mom put beer in a kids sippy cup, I'd definitely at least involve the manager if not the cops. *I* would not want any of the responsibility of looking away if heaven forbid something happened to the kid from drinking a sippy cup of beer. Not to mention, if something were to happen, the restaurant could easily lose it's liquor license, and anyone who was aware of it would at the very least lose their jobs, if not be charged themselves.
So if I saw it in public, I'd report it also.

Kelsey - posted on 07/10/2012

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well jodi most of my family is from holland ukrain and germany so its not uncommon in my family on any either side to allow children under 9 sips of beer or wine and those 10 and up get a mini glass wine with dinner at christmas thanksgiving easter weddings ect ect. its not like we are giving our children a whole 26 or vodka to pound back to their heads. yes we do give them alcoholic beverages to sip but not guzzle back.

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Patricia - posted on 08/18/2012

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My Dad started having so called "sips" at a young age and became an alcoholic and he said he blames it on his parents for allowing him to taste it. Tore my family apart. My Husband and I do not drink nor will we allow our Daughter to have any alcohol. She can choose when she gets of legal age, but I hope she stays clear of it all. I am glad they charged the women.

Brittney - posted on 08/18/2012

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I don't see the purpose in even adults drinking, but I can see how giving a sip to a young child can deter them from drinking later. I was never allowed to touch the drinks when I lived with my parents. I remember I took one sip of tequila and gagged. It was awful!

When my daughter gets older, she will see that we do not drink, but if she is going to, she can drink a little at home with us present and not out with friends, though she may anyway. I prefer to teach her about responsible drinking through actions.

**Jackie** - posted on 08/04/2012

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Dove, I agree. I mean I get what my mom was trying to do and yea it worked....but what if it didn't? what if I drank the whole 6 pack in an hour and wanted more? It's too risky.



I forgot to mention how she got the idea. She grew up in a very Italian home, my grandfather was straight off the boat from Sicily. Starting at the age of 10ish all 4 kids were allowed to have a glass of wine at dinner. They all finished their glasses of wine for the first couple of weeks but then slowly started asking for water with their wine and just kind of nursing the wine and downing the water lol. Her parents really were letting them drink wine because they do that in Italy. Kids even younger than 10 can drink wine...or at least they used to 30 years ago. Anyway, there was so sneaky agenda with them but that's where my mom got the idea :)

Dove - posted on 08/03/2012

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"Jackie"... I think your mom's method DOES have some merit. Take the thrill and forbiddenness out of it... then what's the point? I can see that working quite well with some kids, but backfiring with others... and I don't think you'd know which type was your kid until it was too late.

For me, personally.. I wouldn't do it. I don't drink any alcohol at all, so there's no way I'm buying any for my kid. ;)

**Jackie** - posted on 08/03/2012

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My mom kept a pack of wine coolers in the fridge in the garage for me and my sister if we wanted one on the weekend. She explained to us that she was not naive and that she knew we were going to drink at our friend's house, so instead, why not just drink at ours?

We were so dumbfounded at the thought that our mom was actually letting us that it kind of took all of the excitement out of it lol That 6 pack stayed in the fridge untouched until my parents through it out almost a year later. We just didn't think it was cool to drink because my mom was letting us lol then again, we weren't around drinking growing up. My mom hasn't had a drink since a glass of wine the day she graduated college and my dad has a few beers on Saturday.

My husband and I are not drinkers. Before kids, you may catch me with a glass of red wine every once in a while but I could do without it.

I'm not sure how I feel about my mom's method of somewhat reverse psychology. What do you guys think? My daughter is only 2 so I have plenty of time to think about it.

Kathy - posted on 08/02/2012

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I would let a young teen have a sip and an older one have a drink or two ( no more)



I think it is important to role model moderate and appropriate drinking, and, as they age, allow them to try it if they want - safely and with guidance - in their own home.



I do not think drinking should be seen as taboo or forbidden fruit - it only makes people want it more, and perhaps make bad decisions.

Sarah - posted on 08/01/2012

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My daughter has just turned 8 and she's had a sip of wine twice (once white, once red) and one sip of beer.
She asked what it tasted like, so I gave her a sip. She's never asked again.

I don't see the big deal. I think is drinking is seen as a grown up and exciting thing to do......kids will want to do it more. If it's it's seen as dull and mundane, it won't have so much appeal.

I really don't think that 3 sips of alcohol is going to make much a of a difference in her life one way or the other though.

Kristi - posted on 08/01/2012

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Good luck with that "perfect" thing...most kids jump out of perfect and into human long before they are even 2.

Tine - posted on 07/31/2012

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I definitely don't let my children have any alcohol! Alcohol in any quantity affects the body in numerous ways. It is a toxin, and children's undeveloped livers have even less ability to process and remove it than adults do. Any alcohol for children affects brain development, and a sip for a child's body is a great deal more than it is for an adult's.

And I simply don't want to normalize drinking for my kids. They are born perfect. I want them to stay that way as far as possible.

Becky - posted on 07/31/2012

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No. There would be no point to it, and as some have said, what if they like it? Then you're constantly worrying about it when you have alcohol out.

However, I also hate beer and don't drink a lot of wine. I drink the overly sweet girly drinks, which my kids probably would like, so no way am I giving them a sip!

Lady Heather - posted on 07/24/2012

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At that age I don't even understand it. What is the point? For laughs? We introduce wine to teenagers in a civilized manner in my family. But a three year old won't even like it, so why?

Kelsey - posted on 07/24/2012

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none of that is my point. i would never get my kid drunk so they would"calm down" thats just fucken stupid and bad parenting. if my kid is being that bothersome she gets put in her room and if she doesnt cry about it i might go and put on a movie.

Ana - posted on 07/24/2012

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No.. this is not necessary..what's the point..?? Is it being done to laugh at how the kid acts? Or is it being done for nutrition?? I'm just not sure what the point is? Especially as a kid..

I've had family members who have done this and it's mostly because they are tired of their kids and want them to be a bit drunken and calm down...that was their point!

Momof1 - posted on 07/23/2012

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I would not let my son have a taste of my alcohol. He is almost 3 and I won't allow him juice (unless it is a taste of mine) or soda. I see no reason in letting my son try a sip just because he is curious, or bugging me, or for whatever other reason. I am pretty generous in what I will allow him to sip. As I said, I'll allow him to sip my juice, lemonade, iced coffee... However I do often think when he is older 15 or 16 (or whatever age I deem appropriate) he may have a glass of wine with like Christmas dinner or Easter, but I would have to see when that time came. I don't think that letting your older child have a drink is wrong or will encourage drinking. Kids will do what they want no matter what. I usually do not drink while my son is still awake. Every so often I have a drink about a half hour before his bedtime and the past couple times he wanted my cup so badly, but I said "No, the drink is mama's." He would keep asking and I just keep on saying no and telling why he can't have some.

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/23/2012

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Again, THIS COMMUNITY IS A DEBATING one. It is called "Debating Mums". There are a hundred other communities on CoM that are NOT debating communities. If you do not want to debate, it is best you do not frequent debating communities. It is what we do and it is not going to change. My point, I think, has been made, here.

Charné - posted on 07/23/2012

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I do belong to forums or communities on other websites and everyone's opinion gets respected so I am used to giving mine knowing it will be looked at openmindedly.
Debating is not the issue, going around in circles is, everyone has their opinion and sticking to it thats all.
I made one point and had to explain it in quite a few posts, the same thing said over and over, I rest my case

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/23/2012

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Charné--- If you have an issue with debating than this is not the community for you. This is a debating community and it is what we do. Like it or not.

Charné - posted on 07/22/2012

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We have grown up with these medicines even my gran and she has never drank a glass of wine in her life, so its all up to the individual when they are grown up to get addicted to alcohol or whatnot. My 3yr old has never tasted these medicines as they taste horrible, but it has helped a few times with my eldest.
Even if I didnt drink or didnt give my kids alcohol I would just leave people to do what they want, God gave them those kids for a reason and they will have to answer when they screw up.
Alcohol is bad for everyone, but is accesible and we cant stop whoever uses it, same with moms giving sips to their kids, it happens but what can you do just debate and debate till you're blue in the face and they will still go on doing it?
You will probably never understand my point of view I guess, maybe our worlds are too different??

PS: MeMe I said I DONT give my 8yr old children's medicines and the dutch medicines are not my own concoctions they are bought at almost every store, pharmacy you name it. Its manufactured by an actual company.

Melissa - posted on 07/22/2012

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It's only ok once your "child" is 21 years, before that it is illegal! Don't do it! Why would you want to encourage your child's palate to accept alcohol?

Kristi - posted on 07/20/2012

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Charne'--

I was not judging you, I specifically said I was not being confrontational. I was just curious, which I also stated at least twice. I didn't say if I was for or against giving SIPS. Just for your information, in my first post about the subject, I said I gave my 8 & 10 year old sips, one of beer and one of a wine cooler. So you might want to turn off your judgemental attitude. If I have a problem with your opinion, behavior or whatever, I'm not going to pussy foot around it. I will tell you straight out.

As MeMe pointed out this is a debate forum and people question each other's ideas or beliefs, behaviors and the like. I learned the hard way if you can't handle the heat, get out of the kitchen when it comes to a debate forum. I also learned that MeMe can back up what she is debating so be ready if you're going to take her on. ; ) I also saw your comment in the online etiquette thread, there are hundreds of the threads and communities on here that are not as intense as the debate forums. Hope you try those out before you give up on the whole CoMs. Good luck!

Karla - posted on 07/20/2012

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I googled this:



KRAMPDRUPPELS (Solution) (H.M.)



COMPOSITION:

Each 5 mL contains:

Tincture Valerian 2,38 mL

Tincture Lavender Co. 0,24 mL

Solvent Ether 0,26 mL

Ethanol (100%) 55,0% v/v







Charné

I do respect cultural differences, but please use caution with that stuff.



ETA: There are alternatives with herbal treatments without an alcohol base, or homeopathy.

Karla - posted on 07/20/2012

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I don't know. I have read about parents going to jail for giving their underage kids alcohol. It's never been for medicinal purposes though, more likely teen parties. There are the concerns about: the laws in your area, when sips become more, being mature enough to value and follow the laws, acknowledgment of health risks, etc. [edit to clarify]



I have a hard time with it because I see that in the US it is such a taboo with age limits, etc. It seems some under 21 people want to drink just for the thrill of breaking the law. I cannot think of a happy medium though because there are very valid reasons for the law, most involving mature decision making & safety.



I really don't value alcohol all that much; I've seen it be the source of a lot of pain and suffering. I wish my attitude (model of behavior) would rub off on my kids, but I seem to be only 3/4 successful with that method. (btw I have 3 adult kids, and one teen.)

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/20/2012

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Charné---It's part of who we are, that's all And you're right scoring points with who? So why go off the rails trying to force your point??

Because this is a debate and it is how it works.

Many of us have provided information (links) showing how detrimental alcohol can be to the growing brain. Where is your proof and/or evidence that says it is perfectly acceptable to give alcohol to a small child? I am not talking experience. That is not proof, nor is it a solid case for a debate of this type. Some debates, experience is acceptable but this one there is a wide range of information written by doctors and psychologists, so it warrants evidence.

If you want to give your young children alcohol, go ahead, just keep in mind what it could be doing to their little growing brain and their development. Whether it has been done for years and years, is a moot point. No one used car seats or seat belts back in the day, either, now it is illegal. Would you still practice NO car seat or seat belt?

The thing about "back in the day" or "old used methods" is that they did not have the same information available to them, as one does today. The world evolves and so does it's understanding and education on most topics, especially children and what is deemed appropriate and/or safe.

I will never understand why anyone would want to give their young child alcohol. It makes absolutely NO sense, whatsoever. I mean, it is NOT a life requirement. They are not going to die without it but they may with it. Even if you use different medicines, you don't have to, you choose to.

BTW - You said you give your 8 year old children's medicine, that is not saying you give them your own concoction. That says, you go to the store and BUY children's medicine, like Advil/Tylenol or Benylin/Buckley's cough syrup. Which, is simply not something most parents have to give their children often and it does NOT contain alcohol.

Charné - posted on 07/20/2012

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Kristi I meant that if you are the kind of parent who does it then obviously not getting the child drunk and not doing it from every glass on every occasion. The last time I gave my 3yr old was probably a month ago but I had a drink last week. What I am saying is I dont see anything wrong with giving a sip, just not all the time.
That is my opinion and if some people can just accept that people do it, there's nothing we can do but give advice and our opinions from our own experiences and not theirs.
If you are against it fine with me but dont judge people who do it coz then I will judge you on your ways as well.
And we use Dutch medicines like jamaica ginger, kramp druppels, entress druppels, there are quite a few with Afrikaans names, i think the name is Lennon. Grannies use it to massage newborn babies as well for its soothing properties so i guess its probably a cape coloured or south african norm amongst coloured people. To you it might sound preposterous but here its the normal thing, sometimes even a nursing sister will tell you to use one of these medicines coz it works it really does. It's part of who we are, that's all
And you're right scoring points with who? So why go off the rails trying to force your point??

Kristi - posted on 07/20/2012

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Out of curiosity, what kind of "old-time" medicines are you talking about? Like home remedies? I'm pretty sure nobody is trying to score brownie points by not giving their child(ren) alcohol, besides, who exactly would they be trying to score points with? I am also curious what "in moderation" means when you are talking about children and alcohol? I've just never heard that term used with children and alcohol in the same sentence. I'm not trying to be confrontational so don't attack me when/if you respond. Sometimes, I'm not sure what a poster is saying so I like to ask for clarification in order to try and understand their point of view, opinion, advice, etc.

Charné - posted on 07/20/2012

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Normal medicines don't have alcohol yes but here in cape town where I'm from and my culture what we use does contain alcohol and that's how we were brought up.
Everyone is different and there is no way opinions can be forced on others, how kids turn out coz of alcohol or any drug is a personal thing, some ppl do, some ppl don't.
Anyway I am a working mom and very busy and YES I give my toddler sips of my BEER, call the cops.

Charné - posted on 07/20/2012

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I dont give my 8yr the normal childrens medcines, I use the old time stuff my mom used to give me which works quicker and more effectively and yes I used alcohol for both my kids' gums and it worked much better.
Nothing wrong with alcohol as long as used safely and responsible.
Not giving kids alcohol sounds righteous and good, but you wont get any brownie points for saying "no ways I dont give my kids alcohol!"
There's no right or wrong for using it in moderation and not abusing, after all it's their kids so let others do what they want as long as their kids are healthy and happy.

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/20/2012

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What are the LOTS of medicines with alcohol in them? Gripe water USED to have alcohol but they have since taken it out. Medicines that did have a slight amount have had the alcohol removed.

Charné - posted on 07/19/2012

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Just another point i wanna make its up to your child because I did that with my first child and she hated the taste and still does at 8yrs old, my 3yr old likes it so I have to be careful of where I put my glass

Charné - posted on 07/19/2012

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lots of medicines have alcohol in so I see nothing wrong with giving a child a sip of your beer, just not all the time

Sarah - posted on 07/15/2012

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Toddler no. Early teens I dont see a problem w a few sips. my parents always let us have a glass of wi.e on special occasions. And due to that neither me or my four bros are all that interested in it. We alldrink just on special occasions. An never get drunk.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 07/15/2012

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Caffeine has been proven to have the opposite effect on children with ADD and ADHD and it is in Ritalin.



ETA: Meme COM is hating the Maritimes again

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 07/15/2012

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I give my 7 year old coffee because she has ADD- it's about the same as giving her ritalin.

Beth - posted on 07/15/2012

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I've given my son a sip of wine, but he hated it and hasn't had any since. I only allowed it because I figured he wouldn't like it, but he was curious, and one sip won't hurt anyone. My dad gave me sips of his beer when I was 4, 5 years old.

But giving much more than a few sips *is* dangerous, and could even kill a child. Their small bodies don't tolerate alcohol like ours, even "just" beer and wine. I'd be curious about exactly how much beer she put in the sippy cup? I mean, I suppose it would have to have been significant for people to get concerned, but people are also a little overbearing these days...

Karla - posted on 07/15/2012

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Aleksandra, Thanks, but even with refresh, or reload I'm having problems seeing recently posted comments.

Aleks - posted on 07/15/2012

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I have found a way for the updates to be seen quicker....
I tend to click from my email to open the window ... and many a time I don't see the update that has been notified to my email, if I then "refresh"/"reload" the page the new posts typically appear...
Hope this helps :-)

Karla - posted on 07/14/2012

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No, I wouldn't intentionally give my child alcohol. We don't have much in the house anyway. My oldest daughter (when she was about 5) accidentally sipped beer because my husband always shared is soda pop with her and she thought that's what he had. She hated it.

I don't feel comfortable with a developing brain being exposed to alcohol; hell, I'm not comfortable with my mature brain being exposed to alcohol. We have enough information to know it can't be good for a kid.

Alcoholism is a sticky wicket - they call it a disease, they don't know a cause, it may or may not be genetic, etc. Suspecting a loved one is alcoholic is very difficult, and watching them make terrible choices because of alcohol is awful. It can affect anyone, and it affects the whole family. I bring this up because I'm getting a sense that some people think alcoholism is a decision; and though the initial drink or habit may (or may not) be a decision, the disease itself is not a choice.

Dove - posted on 07/14/2012

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My parents didn't/don't drink at all, so my brother and I were never offered a taste under their supervision.

I drank a little alcohol at 14 (crazy summer) and then again a bit from 16-21, but have never been drunk and only 'slightly buzzed' once or twice. I am 100% against alcohol now and haven't had a drop in over 11 years... and the amount of alcohol I consumed from 21 until that time would equal MAYBE one alcohol drink.

My brother drinks all the time and has been drinking since he was at least 17 (that's when I was 14... I don't know about earlier cuz I wasn't 'privy' to that information lol).....

I can almost guarantee (though obviously not quite) that if our parents HAD let us taste alcohol as children.... our adult drinking habits would be the same.

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/14/2012

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Same here, Tracey. I do not give my children juice, under age 3, I do not give them pop under age 5 (over this age, they get very limited pop, such as when we go out to a restaurant, which is rare. It is a treat, only). My son, 21 months, only gets water and milk. I found out the daycare gave him apple juice and I was not happy. I was glad to know, though, he did not like it and wouldn't drink it.;) My 13.5 year old, prefers water and milk. She typically asks for water before asking for juice. She has also stated numerous times, that alcohol stinks and she can not understand how anyone could drink it (she has never tasted it). However, I don't drink but my husband does like a beer, here and there. There is still no interest.

Tracey - posted on 07/14/2012

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Mine had no alcohol, no caffeine and no coke until 10. Now they don't like it and don't want it, although we offer 16 year old a little when ever we have a drink. By choice they drink water, juice or milk.

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/14/2012

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Megan, in no way am I saying your daughter's will grow up and drink because they were given sips. I am saying you are lying to yourself to think that because you did allow them to try it early on, that they definitely will not go overboard when they get older. I know many people that were allowed sips and they still became heavy drinkers in their early adult years.



I grew up around a bunch of alcoholics. All 6 of my uncles and my passed grandfather, on my mothers side, are and were alcoholics. One of them was murdered (because he was drunk and they decided to rob him and kill him), another died from alcoholism and my grandfather died of stomach cancer. Every single one of them has lost their licenses on numerous occasions. I grew up with these uncles, we were all very close. I still drank like a fish during my teen years.



Kids have been learning about alcohol and tobacco for years in school. I can say, it has not deterred many of them. Some? Sure. I think it is rather naive to think that a child is going to take other individuals situations and place them into their own person-hood. Sure, it may help but it is not a guarantee. Teens, especially, are indispensable (at least they think so), they no longer take what they have learnt about others, as a lesson for themselves. Which is why it is all about how their parents dictate themselves around the child, since this is what is ingrained in their mind, not some persons mishaps. For instance, all those out of hand kids that are brought to prisons to be "shown" what will happen to them, do you think it makes them all smarten up? I don't think so. Teens are not able to process in someone else's shoes, very well.



In regards to not allowing your child take sips (or other certain bad habits) and them later on taking it to the extreme. Yeah, no, I don't think so. I would like to see the proof you are talking about. Since, I can say, this again, falls with the example of the parent and how they teach and guide the child. Being a parent and a responsible one, to me is important. Children should not be drinking alcohol and this includes sips. You are condoning it to be OK. Remember kids don't process like an adult. All they are understanding is, it is OK for them to take sips. When do those sips turn into drinks? Alcohol has an age restriction for a reason. It is not a benefit to a growing brain. Sip or not, it doesn't matter to me. The fact is, you are condoning it and in essence are saying it is acceptable, to do.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 07/13/2012

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Meme and Alesksandra. It's been proven that the more forbidden something is the more likely someone is going to want it. I use those studies and how I turned out (not drinking, not smoking and not doing drugs) to go by how I parent. And sorry, but just because you drank even though you didn't like the taste doesn't mean my child will. She's also heard enough about her uncle who can't have a license because of his DUIs and seen what drinking beer all the time has done to my FIL (along with smoking- he's about 9 years younger than my dad but looks 15 years older- same with her paternal grandma who smokes and is the same age as my dad but looks 10 years younger. Not to mention what those cancer sticks are doing to their lungs). She knows that DH's grandfather died from liver failure due to drinking. She also knows that I took care of a woman who had alcohol induced dimensia.



My father and his brother and sisters were all forbidden from having meat, sugary snacks and junk food so they snuck it and learned to be sneaky and lie to get around my grandma Donnelly's strict rules. All my dad's sisters except for 2 now are extremely overweight because they never learned self control.



Children also learn by example. I guess you all missed the part where I explained my husband and I don't drink very much in the first place. It's to the point that we don't even have red wine vinegar in the house because I don't cook with it. My inlaws do drink, but they do so responsibly as does my family. No one drives after drinking, no one gets shit faced in front of any of the kids.



And finally Aleksandra it's not rabbit shit to explain some things with culture. If your family grew up doing something a certain way that is how you veiw your culture. So I'd thank you to be more respectful to my veiws.

Aleks - posted on 07/13/2012

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OMG MeMe... I just read some of the previous comments and noticed you are due on the 23rd Feb... that's my daughters birthday!!!!

And I totally agree with what you have just said re the taste of alcohol and why people drink it. I like your smoke example, too....lol, but I remember many people doing it to their kids, especially AFTER they caught them stealing smokes from them ( or just caught them smoking )...lol However, to some it was a deterrent, to others not. I never had a cigarette until I was 15yrs old. Both my parents smoked, all aunts and uncles smoked, most grand parents smoked (except for my paternal grandma and then later my maternal grandma who quit). So I grew up around cigarettes everywhere (hey, it was the late 70s-early 80s in eastern Europe, EVERBODY SMOKED...lol).. I ended up being a smoker, and so did my brother, who took his first cigarette at 5 or 6 (yep, he pinched them...lol) and he got the "you smoke this cigarette until you finish it" lesson. One of my cousins had that lesson too, and she hasn't touched a cigarette for a long time, if ever (don't know if ever, we moved continents and so contact wasn't so tight, but as long as I know her she was and is a non-smoker even though both her parents were/are).

As for the ethnic background and drinking habbit. Shit!!! I am Polish.... so does that mean I should be offering my kids shotties of vodka at social occassions (which by the way, is a customary to have some alcohol whenever ANYBODY comes over or drops by)???

This is riddiculous.

And from my understanding, the nations that do drink wine frequently with their meals (such as Italians and Spaniards, etc) tend to drink low alcoholic types - have you ever tasted Lambrusco? Its low alcoholic and very mild tasting wine. I would assume similar with the beer drinking, too. And also, if kids do get the wine, I doubt its 3yo... Its probably more like over the age of 10. (at least this is what I have observed in these families)

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/13/2012

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Megan, I too am of German decent (and English). I did not grow up being allowed to have sips of alcohol. I have had bouts of drinking irresponsibly but as I have gotten older, I no longer drink. I have had two drinks in the past 4 years.

I can also say, that at the age of 11, I was stealing alcohol and I did NOT like the taste of it. I still drank it and got shit faced, for my first time at the age of 12.

I simply do not agree with those that think if their child does not like the taste, it will deter them, later on. It isn't true. Alcohol is more often, than not, a social thing. When you are a teen and your friends and their friends are doing it, you want to fit in, so you do it, too. Whether you like the taste or not. The taste is most definitely NOT the deciding factor for many, until they are older and have acquired and/or found what tastes they actually appreciate and can afford.

A young child is not thinking of fitting in with their friends. So, if they dislike the taste, it may keep them from asking for a couple years but it is not going to sway them, when all the other teens are doing it. It has to do with education and how the parents present their own drinking habits. How they teach and guide their children, in regards to alcohol and drugs. It has nothing to do with, well they tried it when they were 3-10 and did not like it, so I think they learnt a valuable lesson and won't do it. I mean, would a parent give their kid a rail to snort too? Watch this, Timmy will feel like puking after, so he will never do blow, again. Or how about, a smoke. Would you let your young kid take a puff of your smoke? That would make them ill, immediately. I guarantee, it does not mean they will never touch it, later on. Unless, you set an example and teach and guide them. Hell, when I started smoking, I hated it. I was 12 and I barfed more than once. I still did it, though.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 07/13/2012

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I let my 7 year old get plastered... it's much easier to get her to bed that way. :)



Ok now for reality: In my family (we're of Irish/German decent so it's part of the culture I grew up in) my parents allowed my brother and I to have sips of beer or wine at family dinners so we learned that while drinking alcohol is a privlege it's not something to get shit faced stupid over. More than 20 years after my parents started that with me and I only drink on rare occasions. My brother also doesn't drink very often and is always his wife's designated driver.



During Canada Day weekend DH, the girls and I were at an uncle's house and I'd gone to the liquor store with DH's cousin and grabbed some hard peach cider because I knew I wouldn't be driving at all. The cider came in cans and my 7 year old was bugging me for a taste. I let her have a sip and she ran to the washroom to spit it out. DH was against the idea because he doesn't drink except on rarer occasions, but I told him that if she tries it now and sees that it's not something she likes she's less likely to want to steal one from his mom's fridge later.



I also allow my 7 year old occasional sodas and give my 16 month old watered down juice.



ETA: I read up on being able to drink and breast feed so I only had the one 355ml can. I hadn't had any alchohol in 2 years because my OBGYN had even kabboshed sipping the Communion wine.

MeMe---(Past And Present) - posted on 07/13/2012

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Aleksandra - I am 8 weeks, so still fairly early but very exciting!! Thanks!! ;)

Rosie - posted on 07/13/2012

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i have in the past let my children take a sip of beer/smirnoff that i was drinking. i don't think a sip is harmful at all. however, i havn't let my 5 year old have a sip of anything like that ever, and my older two havn't had a sip in years, cause honestly i just don't see the point. i thought it was cute i guess to see their faces after they drank it, and thought it was a good deterrant to have them NOT drink an alcoholic drink that could've been lying around (go outside to smoke, left over from the night before, etc) since my children will drink anything (including toilet water, lol). i wasn't thinking it would make them not drink when they were teens....
anyway, i think it's pointless now, doesn't seem like there is any reason too...so i don't anymore.

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