finding out the gender
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Krista - posted on 03/15/2010
We were going to wait, but I had to have ultrasounds every week after 36 weeks, due to my gestational diabetes, and at one of them, the doctor asked if I wanted to know the gender. We had intended to wait, but decided "yeah, why not?"
I'm glad that we did. I was 100% convinced that I was having a girl. So when I found out that my baby was a boy, it was strange. I was totally in love with my little boy, but I had totally imagined and pictured this little girl, and to find out that she didn't exist actually made me kind of sad. I had a lot of mixed emotions for that first day after finding out.
After a good night's sleep, I was fine again, and excited to meet my little man. But I'm glad I found out, because I would have hated to have had those mixed emotions at his birth. (I know, I probably wouldn't have, but you never know, right?)
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Jessica - posted on 08/10/2010
We found out with my son, and we'll find out with this one too (September 1st... can't come soon enough!!!). I just can't stand the anticipation, I have to know. Also with me mentally, it really helps me bond with the baby when I can refer to it as a he or she and think of it on those terms. And for some reason I can't plan anything until I know what it is- room colors/bedding/decorations, names, clothes, nothing!
Part of me would like to wait an find out someday though. Maybe with our last... whenever that will be, lol. DH will want to find out though so he'll have to keep the secret from me.
Ashley - posted on 08/10/2010
I didnt find out for my son. My husband wanted to know and if he found out I had to know. So at my ultra sound my husband asked the nurse and she told him they dont check anymore. I was like yay!!! Apparently hear were I live the only way to find out is to get a 3D ultra sound which costs like $100. Now I really want a girl and I'm trying to debate if I would like to find out with my next pregnancy to get used to the idea if I'm going to have another boy. If I do have another boy I'm sure I'm going to love it just the same though. Plus I always knew my Devon was a boy!!!
I guess i'm also in the minority, Never found out. All 3 were a suprise and if we decide to have 1 more it will also be a suprise.
Not many things in life are a suprise anymore and this is the one thing that i believe should be! :)
But i dont care if others find out cause then i know what to buy for them!
Lindsay - posted on 04/14/2010
I found out with both. I felt more at ease knowing and being able to plan for the babies. I'm not a fan of gender neutral clothing and the few things that were, never got worn. I felt that it made me enjoy my pregnancy by being able to focus on what gender name we needed to pick and in general getting everything ready for Madeline and Cooper.
Laura - posted on 04/14/2010
We didnt find out! Just 25 years ago people rarely where able to find out the sex. And You know i felt like it didnt matter what we had so what was the point of knowing? Now when we have more we dont need to buy a bunch of New stuff cause all the stuff we have if works for a boy or girl!!
Joanna - posted on 04/13/2010
Even though I'm not finding out the gender, I still have gender specific clothes. I bought a couple new outfits for each gender, and stocked up on boy, girl, and unisex onesies when the Children's Orchard had a 4 for $1 sale. And regardless of the sex, they will be using my daughters old pink carseat... they're a baby, they won't mind. And the baby will be in a room with us until it's sleeping through the night, and if it's a girl we won't have to repaint the room it'll be sharing with our daughter, and if it's a boy we'll just repaint it bright primary colors with letters and numbers.
Krista - posted on 04/13/2010
I found out for my son and also for my daughter, who will be born this July. Frankly, I'm a planner. I NEED to plan. I have to have gender oriented clothes, with a gender oriented room and gender oriented toys.
Not that I have anything against kids playing with opposite gender things. One of my son's favourite things is a tea set. I'm just that kind of person who enjoys shopping for babies.
Terri - posted on 04/13/2010
I have had 4 children and I didnt find out for any of them! I love the surprise and anticipation of wondering what you are having. I had 2 boys so naturally assumed the third would be a boy too so when we had a girl it was extra special. Then with the 4th child the sonographer said "he" at the ultrasound and we thought we were having a boy.
So we were all shocked again when we had another girl! A lot of blue stuff had to go back with that one lol! But seriously I think finding out the sex before hand is like opening a present before christmas. It spoils the surprise.
When someone you know is pregnant and have the baby, it's always fun asking the standard questions, what sex is it? whats the name? So many of my friends found out the sex and then picked the name before the baby was born and to me that takes a lot of the anticipation out of it. It's like well yes I already knew you were having a boy called George!
Going through the labour it gives you something to look forward to and focus on when you hear those special words "its a .....!"
Helene - posted on 04/13/2010
I didn't want to find out. It definitely gives you incentivie to push. you want to know what it is. There is nothing more exciting then hearing the doctor say "IT'S A BOY!! OR IT'S A GIRL!!!" Plus I think it's more exciting for the people waiting to hear that you gave birth. They are waiting for that phone call and then they say the same thing, It's a boy, it's a girl, how wonderful!!! I know being on the other end of that phone call and it's kind of boring to me because I already knew what they were having, so it was like "Oh, ok Johnny is here, how much did he weigh...". I think knowing takes the entire excitement out of the whole experience. Why? Just so you can rub your belly and say "oh. Jon Jr. or Suzie is kicking!" Or so you can decorate the room??So what, just say "The baby is kicking" and paint the room neutral. I don't need to plan everything in life and this is one of those things that can be left as a surprise. Pick a boy and girl name and do the room neutral, what's the big deal? I loved hearing everytime I went for an ultrasound when I told them that didn't want to know, everyone saying to me how nice it is that I was waiting until the end. They rarely hear that anymore. to each his own. but I don't want to know for the next one either.
Initially I wanted to know what whether the baby was a boy or a girl, but it was actually my husband who persuaded me to wait until she was born! It made the pregnancy that much more exciting, not knowing for sure. I had a feeling she was a girl, but a lot of people said she was a boy! So it was amazing when she came out and my midwife said "its a girl!!!" I was so happy!
I think when we have more babies i will want to be surprised again!!!
Kristy - posted on 04/13/2010
I didnt find out with my first 2, affraid the ultrasound would be wrong. Then with my 3rd I wanted to find out the sex just for fun, they said it was a girl. I was excited because my first 2 were boys. Then the next day I had an ultrasound on my galbladder, and just for fun the tech looked at the baby. And guess what, it was a boy! That is why I didnt find out the first 2 times. I love my boys :)
Aliska - posted on 04/13/2010
Although I was curious I didn't want to find out. I wanted to meet my baby and get to know them as a person without any expectations of what they'd be like based on gender stereotypes. Also I knew that I wanted more than one so not knowing the gender meant that all the things we bought before the first child's birth had to be gender neutral and therefore still able to be used if we got a different gender the second time round. There's no way I could've resisted gender-specific baby clothes etc while pregnant if I'd known the gender of the baby I was carrying. I also see the surprise of finding out after the baby's born as a extra reward for going through the labor.
Rita - posted on 04/13/2010
I always knew I wanted it to be a surprise and we went the entire pregnancy without knowing. I wanted my husband to be able to say what it was when baby came out. I never felt the need to know, until the end when I couldn't wait to have baby therefore, couldn't wait to know if it was a boy or girl. Also, it will be helpful to us in case we ever have a girl because we have all gender neutral things.
Megan - posted on 04/13/2010
Kayson wasn't a surprise. But, I am having 1 more & that baby will be a surprise. MY fiance has 4 kids "previous relationships" & they knew with all of them & We knew with Kayson. So, The next baby will be our last baby & first & last surprise :)
Karen - posted on 04/13/2010
I never found out w/any of my 3 kids. I feel it is more fun not knowing. I had a boy and a girl name picked out for all of them. I had them sleep in a bassinet next to my bed for the first 4 months, so I decorated their rooms after they were born.
MaryEllen - posted on 04/13/2010
My doctor didn't do "unnecessary" tests with my first, so his gender was a surprised, although I always said/thought "he" about him.
I was much older with our second and had many reasons for additional testing. I refused an amnio, but a ultrasound showed the baby to be a girl.
Angela - posted on 04/13/2010
OK!!!! Well, I wanted to find out with my second, and my husband didn't. So at my ultrasound, I got the tech to tell me after he left the room. She leaned in and said, "It's a girl!" I said, "Oh." I walked out and my husband was all mad and asked me to tell him and I lied and said she hadn't told me! Why? Because I was SOOOO sick with my second, and felt so different than my first (a girl), I knew it was a BOY!!! So I swore that if it was a girl, I would never tell my husband I knew, but if it was a boy, I would tell him I was right!
Kaden popped out, my husband yelled, "It's a BOY!" and I yelled, "I KNEW IT!!! I WAS RIGHT!!!"
Now I warn all mom's to be to be cautious when finding out gender, because nothing is 100% unless you get an amnio where they get a genetic confirmation of gender (had that with my first!)
Susan - posted on 04/13/2010
I was surprised with both my children (both girls). The first time around i really really really wanted to find out but my husband insisted we make it a surprise and i can honestly say i'm glad i listened to him. It made their births that much more magicial.
Althea - posted on 04/13/2010
I found both times. I just COULD NOT wait. My husband and I were so excited. With my first my husband just "knew" it was a girl...and he was right. With the second I just "knew" it was a boy and I was right. As of now we have a beautiful daughter Madalyn and a handsome son Ayden...still deciding on a third.:)
Camille - posted on 04/13/2010
Didn't find out with my first but felt she was a girl and was right. With my second was certain was a boy, but she was a girl. So I wanted to know with my third. With my fourth pregnancy, had so many scan because of so many problems, found out both were girls without making that decision. ;-D
Carlena - posted on 04/13/2010
I am pregnant with my 5th. The first one I had to know. The second and third I could tell from the ultrasounds before they even told me. The 4th one I specifically told them I didn't want to know. Same with this one, the 5th. I have even had an amnio because of my age and I still didn't want to find out. 10 more weeks...
Gemma - posted on 04/13/2010
When I went for my only scan at 19 weeks, I didn't mind what sex my baby was, so long as he/she was healthy and normal I didn't mind so when the nurse asked me if I wanted to know I shrugged and turned to the babys father (he left 5 weeks before the birth) and asked him if he wanted to know, he did and we were subsiquently told the baby 'look like' a boy (in the UK they dont say for sure as mistakes have been made a plenty). So I knew but I didn't take it to heart, I bought everything in unisex just in case. I did have a boy as you can see from my childs space.
Katrina - posted on 04/13/2010
for my first child, we didnt find out. my fiance lost his first born daughter so we were afraid that if we found out it was a girl, i really wouldnt be able to do a whole lot, he was scared to lose the baby even though my pregnancy was going well. turns out, we had a beautiful baby gir l who will be 6 months on the 16 with a safe but long delivery. 19 and a half hours total labour, 9 and a half hard and an hour and 25 minutes of pushing. wow time flies lol. i am now pregnant again and we are finding out this time so we know whether or not to keep her clothing from when she was a new born...this baby is due october 12 so it will be around july that we find out. we cant wait
Jessica - posted on 04/13/2010
We found out the gender for the same reason.....We had to know! And because we wanted to have gender-appropriate clothes and such, as opposed to uni-sex ones. I also think we might let the next one be a surprise. I just depends.
Joanna - posted on 04/12/2010
I found out with my daughter, but with this pregnancy we are keeping it a surprise... you just don't get that many surprises! This way, during labor, instead of thinking "okay, lets get this girl/boy out of me" I'll be thinking "I can't wait to find out if I'm having a boy/girl." It'll make the payoff that much sweeter :)
LaCi - posted on 03/27/2010
I found out because I wanted to prove I was right and couldn't wait ;)
I had already prepared the nursery in a unisex theme, its green with jungle animals, as was EVERYTHING we bought for baby lol
All the clothes were unisex because I didn't want my daughter to look like a pink crayon exploded on her, and if it were a boy I didn't care if he were in blue I actually prefer green and yellow. When I did prove he was a boy, I bought some boy clothes. But for the first year most everything was neutral.
We found out w/the first one for shopping convienence, but I didn't want to know for the 2nd one because it was not all that thrilling when they threw him up there and said it's a BOY, it was kinda like "well duh! We've known that for 4 months now!" kinda thing... So with our 2nd one I wanted to be surprised, my husband disagreed, regardless we were watching while the ultrasound tech looked over the baby and was taking measurements etc. When she was checking his belly size it was very OBVIOUS we were having another boy! She didn't have to say a thing, it was clear as day!!! If I have another one, come hell or high water I'm not finding out! I'll just wait to see the pics and not watch during the ultrasound IDK? Maybe accidently schedule the appt so hubby misses it too that way he can't but in and find out...
Christy - posted on 03/18/2010
i found out at the 20 week appointment with my daughter. Travis and i both wanted a girl so we decided that we needed to find out as soon as possible if we were having a boy so we could switch gears and get excited for blue and cars and whatnot instead of pink and flowers and butterflies. for me it all came down to not wanting to be disappointed with the baby i delivered and i think that if i would have had a boy at the last second after hoping for 9 months for a girl that i might have been. we plan on keeping Lexi an only child but if i do get pregnant again i will find out again. i don't really care which i get the next time around, i already have a beautiful baby girl, but i would want to find out for Lexi so she can help me pick stuff out for her new baby brother or sister. i know that she could still help in non gender specific ways but i think it would add to her excitement to know which one she was getting.
Sara - posted on 03/17/2010
I have no need to be surprised, I wanted to know and I'll want to know in the future! I'm not a very patient person when it comes to stuff like that!
You know what I think is kind of crazy? I have a friend that's a nurse and when she was a nursing student doing her rotation through L&D, she had one couple who didn't want to hold the baby after the delivery because the gender was opposite of what they had been told the entire pregnancy. So, I guess in one respect, it may not be good to find out because if they're wrong, some people have a strange way to cope with gender disappointment. I could understand being shocked that everything you prepared yourself for was wrong, but not to want to hold your newborn baby? That's crazy.
Patricia - posted on 03/15/2010
Fiona, I'm with you...I figured I carried for 9 months and knew there was going to be pain during delivery, so I personally wanted some surprise at the end....The nurse saying..."It's a boy." As for the nursery, it was pretty neutral....can't go wrong with the old Winnie the pooh or Noah's ark. Not to mention, my doctor told me that a mother's instinct is usually right on...and for me it was.
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