Krista - posted on 04/15/2011 ( 81 moms have responded )
This branched off from the homosexuality thread, strangely enough.
We often read how traditionally, if a man wished to propose to a woman, he would go to her parents and ask their permission for her hand in marriage. If the parents consented, (and if the woman consented, of course), then they'd get married, with the father "giving the daughter away" during the ceremony.
For many people this tradition has fallen by the wayside.
I married at age 32. I had been supporting myself for over a decade, and had been living with my now-husband for 6 years. If he had gone to my dad and asked for permission, my dad would have probably asked him what he'd been smoking, and would have reminded him that I am my own person, and not his to "give away". If we'd had a family-based wedding ceremony (we went away to get married), I would have walked my OWN self down the aisle.
But...there are some who feel that it is disrespectful towards the parents if the prospective fiance does not seek their blessing/permission before popping the question.
What are your thoughts? Is asking permission from the prospective in-laws a sweet tradition, or insulting and archaic? Is skipping that tradition an insult to the folks, or an recognition of the bride's independence and self-determination?
Whose hand is it, anyway?