How important are looks

Jaime - posted on 10/12/2009

SO my daily attire is a set of scrubs and a vest, see I am a visiting nurse. I shower every morning and again when I get home from work (gotta wash any germs off, you wouldn't believe the state of some peoples houses). After work I am all about jeans and a nice comfy tee or long sleeve. I admit I love american eagle, silver jeans and lululemon clothes and that is what 90% of my walk in closet. Not a fan of dressing up fancy, but do when deemed necessary.

I do frequent the salon for my hair, and mani/pedi (no fake nails here, that is just a breading place for germs). Yes, wear a bit of makeup and my hair is done somewhat even if it is just thrown up in a pony. Can't say I am high maintance, I can be ready to go out in about 30 minutes, can't get myself up out of bed too early so I can be perfectly made up for the day.

Brenda - posted on 09/15/2009

Ah hell! I just wrote a post for this thread and it somehow didn't make it.
I hate that. UGH.

Charlie - posted on 09/14/2009

DOH , now see what all this PJ talk has made me do , now i am staring at Peter Alexander site wishing for new PJ's .

Charlie - posted on 09/14/2009

I have worn my PJ's to the super market a couple of times at night for an ice cream run , but they are my totally luscious , and indulgent designer PJ's .
I know , ridiculous , i have designer PJ's , But my Peter Alexander PJs are comfiest , Cutest PJ's EVER .
My fiance thinks is crazy and hates me buying them , but i am not usually a designer kinda girl so i can at least spurge on those , hell i dont even get MANI /PEDIS anymore and lets not even talk about how long its been since i have seen a hairdresser ........sigh ..........:(

Erin - posted on 09/14/2009

That's a good idea Sharon! I may have to try that, as I'd been having trouble finding cute ones, back before the pregnancy... I'm sure I won't find a shortage on my size in scrubs :) And they do have cute ones!!! I don't necessarily care if I look lazy...I know that i showered and got ready to leave the house and put on a nice clean pair of pj bottoms! It's not like I wear them to bed or roll out of bed and go out like that, I seriously prepare myself intending to look that way... And I don't wear my clothes all sloppy like that, if my pjs were sagging down my ass I wouldn't wear those in public! Oh, & Evelyn, totally not insulted! I know ppl wearing pjs in public gets to quite a few ppl, I don't mind :) its all good! One day @ work, yes I wore pj bottoms to work! (selling cigarettes, ooh) I had two ppl in my line conversing about this very topic and looked @ me to get support (could only see like waist up) and I laughed and stepped back and they both just shook their heads :D They were bright green with Grumpy on them, I thought it was awesome! My boss lady thought they were cute too! ;)

Evelyn - posted on 09/14/2009

Sorry..didn't mean to insult you or anyone else...like I said I LOVE wearing them at home..I have like 6 or 7 pairs that I wear around the house..I just cannot bring myself to wear them out. It really irks me when a girl wears them and they are all sagging down in the back and some have nerve enough to wear crocs w/the pj pants...LOL.

Sharon - posted on 09/14/2009

I love wearing a tank top with a button down shirt over it. But thats it for my layering. In the winter I HATE layers!!!!



And pajama pants, maybe you're comfy - but you just look lazy. And you know I'm all about the "fuck you, I'll do it my way" attitude but not Pjs in public.



Erin - try scrubs super cute prints and not PJs.

Erin - posted on 09/14/2009

I'll take that and not be classy! I LOVE wearing pajama pants! I don't care where I go or who will be there! They make pajama pants in soo many different styles/prints that they just don't do in regular pants and I think its cool! I absolutely HATE jeans and can't wear them! So if it's not pjs it slacks and everyone thinks I'm "dressing" up, but i just refuse to wear jeans so slacks are my "jeans" most of the time, I haven't found any really good pj bottoms and like i said b4 maternity wear, ugh...

Evelyn - posted on 09/14/2009

LOL Jo...I've seen the bazillion layered look..I don't get it. I'll layer a couple of tanks but thats it. The pajama pants?? Ugh..that is a huge pet peeve of mine. I LOVE them at home..but in public?? No class.

?? - posted on 09/14/2009

Quoting Lisa:

And what is up with wearing pyjama pants out in public?  

Devon used to do that when we started dating - I hated it. He would wear old ragged jammies too, not even just plain jammapants... I told him pyjama pants are for bedtime and lazing around the house - not for going out in!!! I ended up getting him a couple pair of nice track pants that are a lil like jammapants but more acceptable for going out in public in! Now he has 2 pairs of jamma pants that I let him wear out if we're just runnin quick to the store and he's stayin in the car while I run in or it's late and I need something after he's got home late from work so we whip up to Wamart and he's already showered and in his jamma's.

One fashion dealio I don't get... shirt over shirt over shirt over shirt. I swear these girls these days look like they're 20 feet tall cause they have 7 layers of shirts on all 2 inches shorter than the one before, the longest one has lace on the bottom or every other layer has lace on the bottom AND they're all different colors!!!

My neighbours teenage daughter has gone outside and she was weain (no joke) 8 shirts, 2 sweaters and a mini-jacket over top... with 2 different colored leggings and a miniskirt over a lil longer slip style skirt........ she looked RIDICULOUS! Oh and to top off the outfit - combat boots with orange and green laces, a multicolored scarf and a frumpy yellow hat............ I thought she might have been running away from home and instead of finding a bag she just put on everything she could grab...... then the next day she wore a similar outfit but instead of shirts she wore different length / color dresses...... Awwwwwwwwwwwwwkwaaaaaaaaaaaard!!

Sharon - posted on 09/14/2009

rotfl Lisa!!

Jinglebones - posted on 09/14/2009

There are definite ABSOLUTELY NEVER fashion trends for me - my husband is on a mission right now to find orange crocs because he knows how I feel about these. I think they are cute on children under the age of 12, but I think they are horrendous on adults - maybe hiding in your garden, but never ever ever wear them out in public (really, grown men wearing neon crocs??). I feel like I am in a weird fasion twilight zone in this community - all the women wear hairdos reminiscent of Duran Duran and they ALL think those grotesque fur boots (yes, the ones from the early 70s - they were cute when I was 10) are the height of style and sophistication - and I have to resist bursting into gales of laughter when I see a couple in matching booties. And what is up with wearing pyjama pants out in public? You would not see that here, but I have seen it in other communities.

Evelyn - posted on 09/14/2009

Sharon...I FREAKING LOVE those socks w/the no slip grip they sell @ Christmas...lol. I stock up on them every year...especially toward the end of the season when they go on clearance..omg. Ok, now that I got that out I can answer the question @ hand. I agree w/the majority of you...I'm not "High Maintenance" either, but I do take care of myself. I shower daily, make sure my hair is done every day and usually splash on a dab of perfume as well lol. As for style...I have a department store in my closets. I have three gigantic walk in closets in my master bathroom and they are ALL FULL. I can't really say I can claim any particular style...it really depends on the day. I can go from ultra-conservative business dress to soccer mom quite comfortably. My every day style is pretty casual I'd say though...I have my fave comfy sweatshirts for fall and my fave tanks for summer of course. I love to experiment w/different looks though. My fashion hero is Lady Gaga...I could NEVER dress like her lol...nor would I want to..I just love how she says "screw what the world thinks..I'm doing what the hell I wanna do" with her style. As for men? Well...I have to say I'm ridiculously picky about who I date. Pretty much all of the men I've ever dated have been insanely gorgeous and muscular lol. (including my ex hubby) They have to be well-dressed and they must be clean and wear great cologne. (just not too much...please don't be that guy.)

Joy - posted on 09/14/2009

First of all, to Miss Grey, quote, "no friggen flipflops either on a dude, ew ew ew". ROFLMAO! Never move to Florida then lol



I have horrible fashion sense. There, I've said it. I'm a 38 year old woman and I HATE SHOPPING. I do not own a little black dress and the only pair of high heels I own are the ones I wore at my wedding this past April. They were on my feet for a total of 3 hours. I wear makeup maybe once or twice a year....MAYBE. Usually when my friend Jenny comes to visit from Indiana once a year, we have a girl's night out and that's my one time I wear make up. Other than that, I'm au natural. I don't pluck my eyebrows (and no they aren't out of control either lol). I see no reason to...my eyebrows and eyelashes are blonde so no one sees them anyhow. I do keep my fingernails and toenails clean and trimmed and sometimes I do paint them....always either dark blue or dark red (like blood red). I have many other colors (an entire make up bag full) but those are the two I always gravitate towards. Let's see.....my daily attire consists of sweat pants and a tank top. When I feel like "getting dressed" I wear capris and a tank top (yeah, I go all out, I know lol). Oh, and I own like 15 pair of flip flops. I live in Florida and I think I only own two pair of closed toe shoes....sexy thigh high black boots (worn once like 4 years ago....not bought by my choice, my friend Jenny made me) and a pair of sneakers. I just had to throw away my pink Chucks because they finally got too worn out and fell apart in the washer. Like I said earlier, I have no sense of fashion and I'm ok with that. I'm always clean (well, most of the time), I don't smell and I brush my teeth twice a day (most days). To me, that's far more important than what I wear. I am aware though, that when Jacob gets older, into school, has friends, etc...I know that I will have to start at least trying to look decent. I don't want him to be "that kid" at school with the mom who drops her kid off braless, wearing a bath robe...lol I'll probably "move up" to jeans, tshirts and sneakers.

P.S. I also wanted to add that the only dress I own period....is my wedding dress and obviously it's a one time use thing. I don't do skirts. I don't do sheer anything. I don't buy it if it's hand wash. I DO NOT own anything dry clean only. I never iron, don't even own one. I'm one of those people who never shops for myself. I always get stuff for Jacob and Steve (they always look great). But me? I get "shopper's guilt" and "remorse" when I get something for myself. Aside from the wedding dress, the last time I bought myself an outfit was.........God.........over a year ago.

Erin - posted on 09/14/2009

My son likes to use me as his napkin :( sometimes just by accident... i don't usually like to wear anything that advertises anything, has words on it, or pictures... So I have a lot of plain tanks and shirts in varying styles. Since it's hot i generally wear capris and skirts. I have a few dresses, but only 1 that fits at the moment :) I will wear a dress to simply sit at home cuz it makes me feel cute instead of frumpy... sometimes I just don't feel like dressing like a napkin. I shower every day, but feel better when I do my hair, although being 9mos preg. I don't always feel like doing my hair :) When I'm not in maternity wear... I generally like to wear pajama pants because they have cute prints, which also helps for having plain colored tops :) I've seen cute printed pants, but then they never have em in my size :( Can't go wrong w/pjs :D I like to wear golf print socks and have odd designs on my bottoms... I guess I don't like to give much attention to my top as it is generally large enough to gain attention all on its own, and I don't much appreciate being gawked at! I have 4 bros who had many male friends, I like cardigans and hoodies!!! I nailed my man 13 yrs ago, I'll do it up for me generally but him too and past that I'm not advertising

Sharon - posted on 09/14/2009

oh is this about us? LOL



I get my brows waxed, hair done at a real salon, I would do my nails at a salon but just can't afford that these days. I don't super long nails, I have whats called sports length. My nails are so thin, they tear and are ragged so I usually have acrylics because they are tougher.

Katie - posted on 09/14/2009

Looks are important for my own self esteem. Yes, I have judged people on how they look, dress, smell....but after having Molly I have better things to worry about!!

Like Loureen, I'm way more productive in the day if I have showered, dressed, and put a bit of make-up on. My friends also love to pop by without notice and well if you guys saw me in the morning you would want me to shower and get dressed too!!

My wardrobe is not all that complicated. I often get classified as a "downtown indie rock chick". Skinny jeans, oversized T-shirts, tights, scarfs, long necklaces, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE my Chuck Taylors...I usually wear the purple/pink plaid pair!!
I work in a music store so my daily outfits are acceptable for work and don't have to ever wear anything dressier than jeans and a t-shirt :)

Heidi - posted on 09/14/2009

I like to think I am not " High Maintenance" kind of gal, but I like to be showered and dressed decently everyday. When my husband and I go out on our dates, and dress nicely, and when we go out as a family I dress according to where we are going. I have a Licensed Child Care in my home, so during work hours I dress for comfort and what we are doing that day.

I want to look respectful, with minimal makeup, but my hair is done everyday(not fancy) but decent.

I like to be me so people have to take it or leave it.

Sara - posted on 09/14/2009

Moms to toddlers have time to shower daily? I missed that memo! :)



I have to admit that my appearance has sort of hit the skids since having a baby...my body is different and I'm not sure how to dress it (and I don't spend money on new clothes for me, heavenforbid) and I'm more concerned with a few minutes of extra sleep than applying makeup. I mean, I still get my hair done and I take care of myself and all that (I do have to go to work), but how I look has gone down to the bottom of my priority list these days...but I'm working on it!



As far as appearance in general to answer the OP, I do believe that how you look on the outside in an expression of who you are and how you feel about yourself (if you look at me you'd guess that I'm tired). And I do think that in society people assume a lot of stuff about you based on your appearance...people tend to assume that people who are attractive and well groomed are smarter (many studies have been done to prove this)...people also judge you on how old you look, how fat or thin you are, what color your skin is...it's reality.

ME - posted on 09/14/2009

I am absolutly NOT concerned with appearance. Don't get me wrong...I shower daily and wear clean clothes, but I only wear makeup when I go to work or out for a special occasion, and I dress very casually, even at work. I get a pedicure every 3-5 weeks, but that's more because I like how it feels then that I care how it looks. I get my hair cut and styled MAYBE twice a year...it's long and straight, and I can't do anything with it anyway, so I rarely do anything to "fix" it. It's too exhausting to be that focused on my appearance all of the time when there are things to do, and a 19 month old to entertain. Not to mention, papers to grade, lesson plans and lecture notes to write, and events to stay current with. Like someone else said, as soon as I do get dressed up or cleaned up for something...I get dirty fingers or a dirty face wiped on my pant leg...that sort of takes the wind out of my "appearance" sails...

Jinglebones - posted on 09/14/2009

I have a very varied wardrobe, but then again, I've lived through a few more decades than the rest of you LOL. I run the gamut, depending on my mood and the plan for the day. Lately I have been revisiting my hippy girl days - I recently bought a gorgeous peasant blouse with beautiful flowers embroidered on it and I love wearing it. I am definitely a jeans and t-shirt girl though, most of the time, and my husband laughs because I probably have about 20 pairs of jeans. I also love leather jackets, shoes and handbags. I am a quality over quantity girl, though. I do not shop very often and when I do, I love a good sale but I tend to buy things I know I will love for a long time rather than the one season fad stuff. The one thing I need to stop doing is, when someone says "oh, I love that jacket", I always tell them the story "This? $50!!" - my whole family does it - we're so proud of our inherited bargain shopping abilities.



I do think it is important - but not the most important thing. I think it's important because of how it helps you feel about yourself. Let's face it, the world operates visually to a large degree, but while we can't always control the snap judgments our brain might make, we should try to be aware of them and mitigate them. I am one of those people many women hate on first sight. I know this. I have had many now-friends tell me, and I see the disdainful appraisals. I am tall, skinny, blonde and annoyingly cheerful. But I am able to eventually win people over by my acerbic and caustic wit, my chewed finger nails and my spitting - can spit like a truck driver. It's a blessing, really.



The community I live in right now is funny to me - the women dress to the nines to take the garbage out and every time you spit, you hit a hair salon. I am a low maintenance girl - 10 minutes tops is the most I ever spend. I am glad I have the confidence I do, because that's all you really need to pull off a good first impression. Looks are nice, but it really is character that counts.

. - posted on 09/14/2009

I've worked in the makeup industry and my partner comes from a family of hairdressers so image is important to me.



After I gave birth to my son, I quickly realised that wearing my favourite clothes around the house wasn't the best of ideas. So now when I'm home, Im mostly dressed in jeans and usually a tshirt.

In the summer im mostly in skirts/shorts/capri's, t-shirt/singlet with my jandals (New Zealand's name for flip flops/thongs - to us thongs are another name for g-string).

I do sometimes try to make an effort to not be too boring with what I wear around the house.

If I'm going out then I do make an effort with my appearance.

?? - posted on 09/13/2009

mmm pantera - I think I just fell a lil more in love with you Loureen!



My wardrobe is pretty.. boring.. LOL I have 1 pair of jeans, 2 pairs of capris, 2 pairs of shorts, 3 skirts, 2 pairs of dress pants (these are the things that fit me - I have about 98091283409238490238 more that don't fit me!) and then to go with those various bottoms I have solid color shirts of different styles, neck lines and arm lengths.



ANNNNND then I have the cutesy saying shirts - "Careful I had a bowl of bitchy for breakfast." "COME CLOSER so I can slap you" "I'd rather be sleeping." "I will try to be nicer, if you try to be smarter." and my favorite "My baby can kick your babies ass" that I wear around the house along with my band shirts that I have accumulated along the years.



I used to really do up my hair and my make up - when I was working, but now that I've been a SAHM - wash my face, brush my teeth, brush my hair - ponytail, bun or hat - and I spend more time gettin Gabe ready than myself. That boys got more clothes than most prissy fashion bitchy teenage richy girls. He certainly has more clothes than I do !!!! And shoes and hats !!! Yeesh...



When I worked though - I had to look all "professional" - manager at a clothing store that was the main supplier of 'dress clothes' in the area - I had to dress up everyday and it suuuuuuuuuuucked! Hair, make up, clothes, shoes, accessories - so much effort just to get home and take/wash it all off (it's like making the bed - why use so much effort when you know you're just gonna mess it up again anyways lol)



Anyways - looks aren't IMPORTANT to me, but being clean and generally presentable is always a nice quality to have lol as I sit here I'm in purple plaid jammie pants that are about 3 sizes too big, a sports bra and tank that hangs down past mah butt - but I'm comfy !!!!!!!!!!

Charlie - posted on 09/13/2009

LOL Sharon , i love a man in flip flops ( thongs) they are pretty much national standard footwear in Australia along with Blundstones for work and ugg boots in winter !

I am a really Moody person so that also affects my dress sense , one day i might feel ultra girly and wear a dress ( which my fiance loves ) and the next day i am wearing silver studded jeans and a deconstructed pantera t shirt with my ultra red lippy , i am also really into fashion but i do not necessarily follow the trends i more create my own to suit me , people often say "what are you wearing " and a year later people are wearing .
I do admit that sometimes i see someone in the street and think
" gawd , you should not be aloud out of your house in that state " i know its terrible but some people have no respect for themselves .
I do agree with Jocelyn , Looking good is not everything .

Amie - posted on 09/13/2009

Ah. I have moccasins. Their made of leather and comfy and soft. Plus they're a part of my heritage. I have ones for different seasons too. LOL.

Sharon - posted on 09/13/2009

oh man - I have bought tons and tons of cute slippers, they all disappear. A long time ago - it was because of the ferrets - now - the slipper gremlins get them I guess.



Actually I've started stocking up on those uber cutesy things they sell at christmas with the no slip bottoms, not slippers, just funky socks. LOL since they're always colored they get washed seperately and get lost.

Amie - posted on 09/13/2009

LOL!! I have slippers I wear in the house. 5 pairs so far. Need to replace one though, they're starting to get holes.

Sharon - posted on 09/13/2009

LMAO Amie. I'm a freak about having on clean socks - I will change my socks 3 or 6 times a day. I can't stand dirty socks, wet socks etc. LOL correspondingly - hopefully my feet stay clean too.

Amie - posted on 09/13/2009

Quoting Sharon:


If you don't care enough about your appearance to make some effort to be clean & neat - you don't care enough to clean your home, or toenail fungus or remember my birthday.

I once dated a guy who used to check the bottom of girls feet. He did this on our 3rd date. I thought it was the weirdest thing ever. I thought he had a foot fetish. Until he said... "I do that because if a part of you is clean that no one sees on a daily basis chances are good the rest of you is clean too." LOL!!

He didn't care that I'm a pretty laid back dresser just that I was clean. There is a difference. It is noticable to people who look beyond the clothes. =)

Sharon - posted on 09/13/2009

Its not the armani suit, its the christian dior outfit, its clean and neatly dressed.



If you have a mole on your face and it enters the room before your nose - save your money and get that bitch nixed off. do not go out in public.



do not go out with greasy hair. don't wear curlers to the store (unless its midnight and you need midol, breast shields or puppy milk)



i've dated some ugly men , I've dated fashion models, I dated a guy who was the twin of Richard gere, and I dated a guy who was often asked if he was related to Jean Claude van Damme(sp?) They all had their issues. Good looking guys had predictable issues. Planning our dates aroung their gym schedule sucked ass.



My husband is NOT a contender for the GQ cover. Even in an armani suit he is NOT a contender.



But he's confident, clean, takes care of himself and puts me first most of the time.



I'm not sure you could call him cute. I just don't see that.



Unless you are so ugly your face would curdle milk - I don't notice.



I've dated some guys who were fat. SWEET guys! but ultimately lacking in confidence. I've dated guys shorter than me, I was ok with that - they weren't. I cannot date a guy in heels higher than mine.



Back in my partying and drinking days - if you had the guts to ask me for date or to dance - you got it. Unless you showed up at the dance club in your garbageman uniform or smelled bad. OMG you can NOT smell bad.



Looking good to me, means clothes that fit properly. No highwater pants, no wife beater t-shirts for a date, no friggen flipflops either on a dude, ew ew ew. Pants must touch the upper arch of your feet/or foot, I don't give a fuck.



UM I was not interested in dating guys in wheelchairs. Not that they are bad people. I was a hiking, 4 x 4ing crazy girl. Slowing anything down was not for me.



If you don't care enough about your appearance to make some effort to be clean & neat - you don't care enough to clean your home, or toenail fungus or remember my birthday.

Kylie - posted on 09/13/2009

I think how we look is important..most people make their mind up about you in the first few minutes of meeting. I judge people on how they look, i can't help it. Like if i see a mum out in trackies and thongs and her kids hair isn't brushed and they have no shoes on their feet my first thought is slapper or tacky family. Same as when i see a mum in full makeup and designer clothes, nails and hair done, smelling like her perfume i assume..she must have a rich hubby and her kids must be in daycare while shes at the spa. It's horrible to admit it but i may as well be honest.

I think my clothes says a lot about me, I'm eclectic and creative, (obsessed with ironing everything) i like colour and to be comfortable. I change my clothing style all the time sometimes it's jeans and a shirt, or flowing skirts and dresses or sometimes a wear short shorts with heels. I like op shopping so my wardrobe is full of random things.

If i stay in my pajamas all day i find i get less done around the house and i feel pretty shitty by the time my hubby gets home. If i shower and put my contacts in or do my hair in the morning it feels more like I'm getting ready for a day at work and I'm much more productive.

Jocelyn - posted on 09/13/2009

to me, looks are quite important, as a form of self expression. but it is by no means the be all end all.
i would consider myself rockabilly/new vintage. that is, when i actually get the time to do my hair lol. those high-waisted pants just look normal unless you have the victory rolls!
i do judge ppl by how they look, but not directly on their style. if you look put together, if you look like you made an effort, then that makes a big impression on me, regardless of what "style" you follow. (i was punk at one point, i know how much time it takes to get your eyeliner and your suicide spikes looking just right lol)
i dress mainly for myself. but it is a bonus that my dh likes big hair, dresses, high heels and smokin' curves!
daily, my style is quite normal, you know, jeans and a t-shirt (with a bit of flair) because sadly, lets face it, 4 inch heels and a crinoline just don't work at the park while you are chasing a 3 year old.
but i do wear my red lipstick to the park :) and possibly a big feather in my hair if it's not too windy...
it isn't tremendously important to me that i look good, but if i am having a bad day, i do my hair and makeup and i definitely end up feeling better.

Lindsay - posted on 09/13/2009

Appearance is pretty important to me. I try not to be overly superficial, but first impressions are hard to forget. My style reflects my personality. I'm laid back but prissy. My daily style is typically a denim mini, jeans, or capris, tank top or baby tee, and my flops. I dress for myself mainly. When me and Josh get to go out, I guess I dress for both of us. I love my heels and a cute little dress or something sexy and I can't say that he complains. I definately feel more confident when I take the time to fix my hair and clean up verses just shorts and a tee shirt. I also make sure to dress my children well. They may not always be in name brands but they always leave the house neat and clean. I think appearance says a lot more about people than they would like to think! =)

Amie - posted on 09/13/2009

Well I dress in sweatpants and a t-shirt all day. I'm a mom to 4 kids, I'm not gonna get all dressed up just to get puked on, pooped on, drinks spilled on, jam and boogers spread on a pant leg or any of the other gross stuff that comes along with parenthood.



When I go out I change clothes. I wear jeans and a shirt most days or capris and a tank. Depends what season it is. LOL.



When Ryan and I go out for get togethers I have dressier clothes that I wear.



I also have my work clothes.



It really depends on which time and day you see me. I could care less what people think of me. I don't pay attention to a person's clothes but you can tell if they don't take care of themselves. The greasy hair and face, slight (or strong) odors. THOSE things I notice.



EDIT: I forgot to add that even my kids have the same type of wardrobes. They have dress clothes, school clothes and play clothes.

Diana - posted on 09/13/2009

Quoting Loureen:

I loved your explanation Diana , very well said and so true !

Thank you! I was actually having a similar conversation with a co-worker a few days ago, though it was more slanted towards the part about needing to be discerning because there are simply too many things to do, people to know, and books to read to get it all done in a lifetime.

Charlie - posted on 09/13/2009

I loved your explanation Diana , very well said and so true !

Diana - posted on 09/13/2009

We all like to believe that "you can't judge a book by its cover," but when it comes down to it, you have to. I mean that literally and figuratively. If you pick up a book and it doesn't look or seem interesting, then you're most likely going to put it right back down and pick up another, more appealing, book; there are simply too many books to read, and one must be discerning about these things. It's the same with people. Even if we don't want to admit it, we're all at least a little superficial. Now I'm not saying that given the chance we wouldn't like someone whose appearance initially put us off, or that we wouldn't devour that book we discarded if it were highly recommended and those first few pages proved the cover wrong-but we tend to gravitate towards certain aspects of things and people. And that's where personal taste comes in. I, for instance, only had to read the back cover of Twilight to know that I didn't want to read the series (or even one book from it)-but many others, including some very good friends, have found that appealing and gone on to read the books. It's the same with appearance. I gravitate to people with similar styles as I, because at least on the surface we seem to have something in common. I generally dress pretty casually-think jeans and a blouse and sandals, and I think it's an extension of my personality-I'm a laid-back, no frills kind of person who enjoys being comfortable. On occassion, I will dress up, but it's as much for me as for my husband-because there is a part of me that secretly adores high heels and frilly skirts and feels sexy when wearing them. That said-I have friends who dress in all sorts of ways, because once past the dress, there has to be something else there to hold my interest, and I've found myself very interested by some people who on the surface have nothing in common with me. But appearance does play a part in the desire to get to know someone, I think-I'd consider myself dishonest if I didn't admit that. Is it fair? No. But it happens. I'm not actively trying to do this, you see-it's a sort of subconscious thing that attracts me to other laid back, no frills people, much like a magpie is attracted to shiny things. I just try to be aware of it and (this may carry the metaphor a bit too far) read the first few pages-and then if I don't like what I see, I'll bail.