kids and swearing

Kidman - posted 6 hours ago

Once they are in high school I let them swear round the house

Gale - posted on 08/28/2012

We use, smurf it, oh smurf and smurfy smurf it, no i really dont know what each mean we just use which ever one feels fit into the sentance lol

Patricia - posted on 08/26/2012

We don't swear in our house. I grew up with a Dad that every other word was a swear word. I don't want that for our Daughter. So far she has never said anything.

Laura Zoey - posted on 08/26/2012

The only swears I sometimes want to say are damn shit fuck and hell. I try to never say those. I'll say crap or shoot->shit good goodness or gosh darn it or dang it->damn for cryin out loud or for real?!?->fuck what the heck->hell

I've never felt the need to use insulting words like cunt bastard nigger chink moron midget retard idiot etc. I'll say stupid....but not often.

Jane - posted on 08/25/2012

I believe it depends on what you regard as 'swearing'. Where I come from in London saying 'bloody hell' is just everyday language and not regarded as swearing so I didn't really curb my vocabulary when my son was little in that respect, I just ensured I did not say the words I consider to be swearing (Fuck, shit, bollocks, etc. - listen to the dialogue in a Jason Statham movie and you'll get what I mean! LOL!). We live in Yorkshire now and they seem to think that 'Bloody' is swearing, which is a strange concept to us.



I would actually have used words like 'Damn' or 'Hell' to avoid swearing as they, to me and my family, are completely harmless words that would never be considered 'swearing'. I think it is probably more to do with blasphemy, but as we are atheists that is another concept that means nothing to us!



My son is now 13 and he has heard worse language as time has gone on - mostly in the playground so I stopped worrying about it. He will very occasionally swear now but always says first 'excuse my language, but [insert swear words]'! He doesn't swear at kids at school, but has learned a host of old English words to enable him to insult them without them even understanding it, which even then he only uses if provoked (his favourite is to call them 'moronic, plukey, dasypygal merdivores' - which is old English for 'stupid, spotty, hairy-arsed, shit-eaters'! lol). He also doesn't swear in public or when out with me and other adults.



I would never berate my son for swearing though. I have never believed in the 'don't do as I do, do as I say' parenting style - it was not how my mother raised me. If he heard it from me, then I have no right to tell him he cannot say it, although I have explained to him what is appropriate and what is not when in company, but that goes for me just as much as him. :)

Laura Zoey - posted on 08/25/2012

I don't swear in front of my kids. I don't want them even knowing the words til they're much older.

Caroline - posted on 08/21/2012

fuck yes

Melissa - posted on 01/26/2011

I swear in front of my children usually not on purpose but I have very bad language always have. My 2 yr old picks up words. She says Shit every time she drops something or whatever or bloody hell or fucking hell. I try and explain they are adul words that she cant say but its pretty pointless atm shes too little to understand. Ive not been told about her using them in dacare yet thankgod lol. When my kids grow up as teenagers yes then they can use what language they want to an extent. When my daughter gets a little older and does know better then she will get soap in the mouth or will be smacked. I got soap in the mouth for bad language bt not quite sure what age or if I will even do that

Nikkole - posted on 01/26/2011

I slip every now and then! One time i was cleaning something on the floor (in my husbands office) and i said "WHAT THE HELL is this" and i didnt know my son was behind me and then a few hours later we were eating dinner and my son looked at his plate and said mom, dad "what the hell is this"? it Took everything in me not to laugh i said honey we dont say those words they belong i the potty! He is 3 now and he slips sometimes and says that or if he drops something he will say Damn it and then look at me and say i mean Dang it! LOL We are trying harder to watch our mouths luckily my son hasn't learned anything worse!

Tiffany - posted on 01/26/2011

I swear like a trucker. It is absolutely ridiculous. I try to curb it, but it is such a hard habit to break. My boyfriend actually was just talking to me about my swearing and sarcasm lol. I don't want my daughter talking that way at all. The funny thing is when I'm in front of my nieces and nephews, I have learned to curb it and I catch EVERY bad word they use and correct them. Constantly saying 'excuse me? what just came out of your mouth?' But at home, my mouth runs free. I am trying very hard to curb it. I just think it's not attractive at all, and kids shouldn't be swearing...at 15 even IMO. I find it more rude when a 15 year old swears because I feel like they are old enough to know better.

Melanie - posted on 01/26/2011

i swear all the time (to the point its a running joke with most of our friends as to how long after i arrive somewhere i'll drop the F bomb, lol) my kids (10, 5 & 9mths) however are not allowed to swear, my 10yr old has started trying to sneak 1 out every now & then, but he gets told off & apologises immediately, i think as each kid reaches late teens i might start allowing a few basic swear words but i really dont like hearing kids swear & will pull other kids up if i hear them say *yucky words* i dont even allow "damn" or "oh my god" (& im not religeous at all) i dont mind if other adults swear in front of my kids (NEVER AT THEM) , within reason & I DONT ALLOW THE C WORD AT ALL EVER!!

Rosie - posted on 01/25/2011

i swear around my children and have no qualms about it. they know it's a behavior reserved for adults, like drinking alcohol, or smoking or whatever "adult" thing you can think of. they do not repeat me, and have each repeated what i've said a total of one time,. it's very clear to them what is expected of children, and what adults can do. there's no problem. :)

Kelly - posted on 01/25/2011

I have to say that it would depend on the situation. Like someone mentioned, they are just words, almost any word can be offensive if you put it in the correct context, in fact, a lot of non-curse words can have a worse effect than some of the most vulgar ones.
So to the point, I don't care if he swears, but he will NOT use curse words to offend others or in anyway that it intended to attack someone. I rarely curse in conversation, I think most curse words just sound vulgar and make the person using them seem less educated or less in control of their emotions, but on occasion I may utter the occasional foul word when I stub my toe, or say "fuck" instead of "having sex" but those uses are not meant to hurt the listener--much like the little girl who said "watch out for chicken shit." She was not trying to be mean, she was just substituting "shit" for "manure" which I find totally acceptable. Conversely, I would never call someone any vulgar name, or use curse words to emphasize an argument or create shock value, and I would not condone my son doing so either--at any age.

Sal - posted on 01/25/2011

if you swear around your kids you can't get cross when they do. I try not to but i do. When my son was younger he wanted to know if he could swear and i told him if he was old enough to swear he was old enough to know whereto do it, not in front of teachers, younger kids, old people, his aunts and uncles, grand parents, a other peoples houses in front of me...basically nowhere, he just stopmed off with the cranks saying whats the point of being allowed to swear if there was no where he could do it!! well derr that was the point....

Meghan - posted on 01/25/2011

I have a foul mouth and I really try my hardest to watch it around him. I catch myself a lot. I think it is funny when my son swears. I don't encourage it, and I usually ignore it but I defiantly get a chuckle out of it.

Jenn - posted on 01/25/2011

@Bonnie - in my house as well as lots of others, those words are just as bad. At my son's birthday party on Saturday the one little girl kept saying OMG, so I told her "we don't say that in this house" - she looked at me like I was from outer space - but she didn't say it again. ;)

Desiree - posted on 01/25/2011

The answer is no and never. I live in South Africa and we are still a very conservative country. It is rude and very disturbing to hear a child using foul language especially at their parents. No its not ok ever. by anyone child or adult.

Julianne - posted on 01/25/2011

I curse badly when i get angry, i think i have mild tourettes sometimes...it just comes out and i don't even mean it. I dont in everyday language, i don't get why i do that....

Jackie - posted on 01/25/2011

I do no think it's ok to swear in front of children constantly.AI slip up is a slip up. This is an on-going debate in my house right now. My BF says Fuck every other word around my 2yo. He even uses it when speaking to me. Or should I say speaking AT me. For instance... last weekend I said to him, Hey, why don't we all go together and his response was, "Fuck No" right in front of my daughter and I get so pissed. I think it does something to a child. I don't want her growing thinking that any old douche bag can talk to her like that and it would be ok. She deserves respect and that's what she'll get.

Nicole - posted on 01/25/2011

I like the idea of telling the child they can swear all they want in the potty. If the child says "fuck" they can go in the bathroom and say it all they want and get it out of their system.

Nicole - posted on 01/25/2011

No. When they are teenagers, if they want to swear when talking with their friends in private, all the power to them. When I am on the bus with my kids (1 and 4) people always swear around them. There is a time and a place for swear words

I have worked with kids for most of my life, so I am pretty good at editing myself, but sometimes a swear word slips out.

Laura - posted on 01/25/2011

I started saying "poopy head" in front of my kids instead of shit or fuck and then my son started call people poopy head and I had to quit. I do make a slip up but my kids (well my 4 year old) knows what's appropriate and what's not.

Bonnie - posted on 01/25/2011

I always say 'oh my God' or 'Jesus'. I just can't help it. I think saying 'oh my God' or 'Jesus' is a lot better than saying 'fuck' though.

Amy - posted on 01/25/2011

Well, I said darn it. Literally DARN it. and my daughter told me it was a bad word. guess it was close enough to her. i just said, you're right, thank you for helping mommy be good. lol. it's not peachy keen okay to swear, but it happens.

Sherri - posted on 01/25/2011

No I don't think it is okay to swear in front of your kids, although I do slip every now and then. They will never be able to use a swear word in front of me until they are legally an adult and not under my roof anymore so probably not until their 20's at least.



We have "Household" swear words. Words never allowed to be used in our home. We are strict about it.



Damn

Stupid

Idiot

Moron

Dummy

Shit

Fuck

Oh My God

Shut Up

May be a few more but can't think of the top of my head??



If these words are used by my children and they are caught there are severe consequences. From grounding, losing privileges etc.



I will never forget sending the older two to school for the first time and they came home horrified and said the kids on the bus swear all the time. They said idiot and stupid. So I explained to them different rules for different houses.

Tara - posted on 01/25/2011

We had a farm when my oldest daughter was about 2 when my dad was up visiting, we were walking around the property and Alyssa walks over and says "Gwampa, watch out for the chicky shit". It was hilarious, and it was evident that she had heard us say "chicken shit" a lot when we were outside as our chickens were free range. lol
But honestly if I heard a 2 year old say fucking bitch I would be shocked and speechless. It's not cute.
I say shit, rarely say fuck, damn is common too. But ironically none of my younger ones swear at all, ever. But my 14 year old swears, but only when it's just me and Steve and him. He knows when not to swear and what is acceptable and what is not.
Words are words, it is the intent and circumstance that lends it's power to them.

LaCi - posted on 01/25/2011

I curse like a sailor.

I can remember, when I was like 7, asking my parents if I could swear and they laughed at me and said they didn't care. I knew not to swear around my grandparents, or at school, around other adults, so on. When I was like 2, apparently, my mom used to say "close the damn door" a lot and I actually called the door "damn door" I thought that's what it was. :) til I was corrected.

I don't care if my kid swears. At all. Words are words. He'll have the same boundaries I had. Don't curse at people, watch who you're saying it around because some people are silly and offended by language, the usual rules.

Sammie - posted on 01/25/2011

I am terrible for the occasional slip, one of my daughter's very first words was actually "shit". We ignored it and concentrated on teaching her new words and she forgot all about it.

I'm 22, nearly 23 and STILL not allowed to swear in front of my parents, so I think for me, I will allow a slip of a few words but that is it, I would imagine anything before 18 in front of me I'd be unhappy with. Isn't it funny how most of us probably swore long before 16/17/18, but now we wouldn't allow it? :p

Jenn - posted on 01/25/2011

Yeah, the 2 year old saying that is not funny - it's disgusting. And again with the grounding for bad grades - really? I mean, really?!?

Joanna - posted on 01/23/2011

She played with one of his buckets at the park, which is what prompted it.

My 3 year old had speech issues as well, in fact when she says "god dammit" it sounds like "Gah-ammit!"

Jackie - posted on 01/23/2011

"A 2 year old boy called my 3 year old a "fuckin bitch" at the park a couple weeks ago. His mom was right there and didn't bat an eye."

sorry but I found this hilarious. I cant imagine a two-year old being able to use those words in correct context. Both my kids were slow talkers due to medical issues, they needed speech for several years so apparently I missed out on some good times. (kidding)

Jackie - posted on 01/23/2011

I have taught my children that swearing has a place and time, I will swear when I gracefully trip over something or get mad enough, I find it humorous that my kids tell me their friends were grounded for swearing but not for bad grades, fighting, back talk, vandalism, etc

April - posted on 01/23/2011

I tried using other words to replace cuss words around my daughter, I say things like chiz, fudge and gammit. Weird I know but my husbands grandmother has a bad habit of cussing around my daughter and now she just loves to screams the S word when she drops something, I get so upset and embarrassed from it considering she is not even 2 and no I dont think it's cute or funny like some people do. When she gets to be about 15 or 16 i'll allow it but not if it's directed towards me or my husband. She has to be respectable with it just like how my father did with me and my sister.

Charlie - posted on 01/23/2011

Im with Jenny on this one .

Teresa - posted on 01/23/2011

Hell, crap, and damn are the worst that I say.... and it's pretty rare. My kids aren't allowed to use those words, say shut up, call anyone stupid (or similar) or say they hate them, etc.... I try not to say shut up or use the word stupid (since my son likes to say it when he hears it), but I slip up from time to time.

So far the kids know and respect my rules on words. If they slip up.... they just get a reminder. We've discussed 'stronger' foul words and how we don't say them as well.

Krista - posted on 01/23/2011

Like Jenny, I derive deep satisfaction from uttering a hearty "Well, FUCK!" on several occasions.

However, my son is now 17 months old, so we're entering the danger zone, and REALLY have to start remembering to curb our language in front of him.

Joanna - posted on 01/23/2011

A 2 year old boy called my 3 year old a "fuckin bitch" at the park a couple weeks ago. His mom was right there and didn't bat an eye.



THAT is what I have a problem with.



I've said "god dammit" a few times, like burning myself or cutting myself. And she picked it up and has used it in instances where she's stubbed her toe or pinched a finger. I'd rather she not, but she sees me say it when I'm hurt and that's the only time she says it, so it's understandable and I dont make a huge deal out of it.

Shannen - posted on 01/23/2011

I HATE hearing young children swearing.
I don't let my children swear. They are 4 and 2. The 4 yr old knows better but the 2 yr old loves to say " thats bullshit" A catch frase of mine. When ever he comes out with it it reminds me to curb my mouth.

Jenny - posted on 01/23/2011

I swear with relish. I don't swear AT people such as calling names but I do use them in any other possible way. I've never heard either of my kids ever swear. We just don't make a big deal about it here.

Deanna - posted on 01/23/2011

I really do try to NOT swear. However, it does slip out occasionally. No I don't allow my kids to swear and I don't want to hear it out of my 14 yr olds mouth even if used right. I don't think there is a right age to start swearing. If anything I think people need to work harder at NOT swearing, period.

Jenn - posted on 01/23/2011

I unfortunately have a potty mouth but do try to curb it around the kids. I do no like hearing kids swear. I don't allow things like "oh my god" or even the word "fart" to come out of my kids mouths. They are only 2 and 5 though. I'm not sure how I'll feel when they're older - I guess I'll have to wait until that time comes. I know myself, even though I did swear as a teen, I NEVER did it in front of my parents.

Joy - posted on 01/23/2011

Yeah, I meant to mention that I can't stand to hear young children (like younger than high school age) swearing. I wasn't always so worried about us watching our language. I mean, we did, we started watching what we said a LOT after he was born, but we'd each still slip here and there. But there was a moment when he was about 18 months old and we were in the car. I can't remember what we were talking about but my husband said, "Oh shit!" Two seconds later, from the back seat, in the sweetest little voice ever, like an angel's voice, my son says, "Oh shit!" THAT's when I got a lot more persistent about watching our mouths. I'm actually pretty good about it now....it's my husband I have to remind from time to time. And his friends.

Bonnie - posted on 01/23/2011

Laura, the parents just laughing when they hear it come out of their mouths is probably the main problem. The kids think nothing of it.

Laura - posted on 01/23/2011

Joy....I'm with ya on the 'bitch' comment lol! and bonnie - it makes me sick! we hear it all the time, and the parents just laugh. aargh.

Cassie - posted on 01/23/2011

I think an interesting facet to this debate is the fact that what is considered a cuss word in one household may be perfectly acceptable in another. One child may grow up believing a certain word is swearing while his friend has been hearing or saying that word as part of his regular vocabulary his entire life.

Bonnie - posted on 01/23/2011

Wow, that just sounds wrong even if they are just playing around when coming out of children's mouths that young.

Joy - posted on 01/23/2011

I don't make a habit of swearing in front of my son, but he has heard the occasional word. I'd venture to say that he's heard them all at one point or another because sometimes my husband's friends don't watch their mouths. When they come to visit, I sometimes feel like I'm the "potty mouth police" or something lol Anyhow, our son is only 3 and awhile back he heard the F word, and then proceeded to walk around for like 2 months saying it constantly. I've finally gotten him out of it (knock wood) and now, it's just the occasional "oh my god", but we're working on "oh my goodness" and "oh my gosh". I don't know what magical age it will all of the sudden be ok with me for him to swear, but I am also not naive enough to think that he never will. I do, on occasion (ok sometimes more than on occasion lol), and I can't expect him to NEVER do it. I imagine that when he's around 16ish, some words will then become ok or acceptable as long as he's using them in the right context and not saying them just to say them. As for the F-bomb? I don't know. Honestly, when I used to be able to curse at will (before I had my son), the F word is my favorite. I didn't used to say it constantly or anything. But, there are times in life when nothing sums it up better than to let out a good "FUUUCK!" So I guess, when he's at that magical age (whatever age that is...16-17ish) and he uses that one.....I sorta think if I'm gonna allow any, I have to allow all...even that one. My only rule is that he doesn't swear AT someone. Like, if he said "Mom, can you help me with this math problem? It's a real bitch!" I might be ok with that. But if he CALLS me a bitch? He needs to run. Just run.

Laura - posted on 01/23/2011

haha yeah i slip up when i get a bit of road rage!! I think its aweful hearing young kids swear though. my neighbours kids are 5 and 4 and swear like u wouldnt believe, like just playing around they are like 'f*uck you f*ggot!' im like WOAH!!

Bonnie - posted on 01/23/2011

No, I don't feel it is okay because young kids pick up on things easily and repeat. Early teenage years it's not as bad as long as it is not outright directed towards family or used in school. My husband has a bad habit of letting swear words slip especially when he is watching tv lol.

Cassie - posted on 01/23/2011

I don't swear in front of my kids simply because I don't swear period. It's just not something I do. Even though I don't actually swear, I watch what I say and how I say it in front of my girls. There are things that IMO are just inappropriate for children to say and it's unfair, while they're just learning to communicate and don't have a good understanding of language, context, and meaning, to expect them to understand appropriate places for certain words.