Me time...

Sal - posted on 04/10/2011 ( 31 moms have responded )

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it is 3am here and i am sitting up alone quietly watching crappy tv and loving it...lately i am having some problems sleeping, i have a few stresses at the moment but not too big, so i am starting to wonder if it is my subconscious giving me some ME time, from 5ish am to until my son goes to bed at 9-10ish i don;t get a moment to myself, my hubby tries to give me timeout when he is home but it usually means me going out,(coffee or a haircut or even a few hours to wander around the don't touch it shops), which is great but i never have time to just sit and veg out, how do you do it? or do you manage it at all?

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Charlie - posted on 04/10/2011

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I have an excellent partner who respects my needs as an individual as I do for him .

When he is home he takes over from whatever I am doing and I will go for a run or grab coffee with my friends and when he wants to go catch up with the boys I have no problem letting him go and do that .

Without time to yourself ( I feel ) you have no time for personal growth , you lose your sense of self and personally I feel I am at my best as a mother when I have outside stimulation and time to reflect in peace .

Generally I get about an hour a day which is a lot compared to others even if it is just an hour or two of time to yourself a week it is worth the re-energisation for you and your child .

I think in our family it has a trickle effect , when the individuals are happy they work better as a couple , when the couple is happy they work better as parents , when the parents are happy the children are happy and if the children are happy the whole family is happy .

I get the feeling ( not here but other places and communities ) that wanting or having "me time " is like some dirty secret we must keep , that we have to or want to spend every breathing second with our kids as if it will get you some prestigious award or if we dont our children wont love us or form bonds with us .....I dont buy that for one second .

Lady Heather - posted on 04/10/2011

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Another thing that people miss when it comes to me time is that unless you are a single parent, there is another parent who might want one-on-one time with the kids. I know most of why I get time alone is because my husband wants to be able to do things on his own with Freja. That is just as important as my recharge. He takes her out for dinner when I have my coffee night. Sometimes if I want to clean without her "help" he takes her to the park. I think it's great that they will have all that shared time together to just be daddy and daughter.

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Veronique - posted on 04/13/2011

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It doesn't happen very often but my favorite time is when everyone is sleeping including hubby and i go down stairs and curle up with a good book for a few hours. That's my me time. So yeah usually around 11pm till about 2am. But like i said i don't really do it that often because at 11pm i'm so tired that i just crash. If not i go take a bath and bring my book and sit in the tub for like and hour while i hear the kids screaming and crying and daddy freaking out lol but i till stay because mommy needs a time out too :)

Brandi - posted on 04/13/2011

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I have "me time" on my day off from work during the week. The kids are in school from 7:45am until 2:15pm then they go to after school program from 2:15pm until 5:30pm. My fiance works from 8am until 6pm. SOOOO, since I work 45 hours a week, PLUS do all the cleaning and cooking and taking care of the kids, and homework helping, and car pooling them to their ballgames.. I take that 1 day of freedom every week and ENJOY the hell out of it. 9 HOURS of "ME TIME". :):)



*GRANTED I had to wait until the kids started school to get this time, but oh well. It took 5 years, but I finally have some well-deserved time for myself!

Jennifer - posted on 04/11/2011

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i dvr my favorite tv shows and watch them after both kids and the hubby go to bed. that way no one interrupts needing help in the potty, or wanting to snuggle. :)

Johnny - posted on 04/11/2011

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My partner is very willing to give me "me time". But neither of us really get that much of it. When you factor in working time and communting time, we are only home for 4 or 5 hours a day when we aren't sleeping. And since we don't see each other or our daughter as much as we'd like, it's hard to schedule "me time" on weekends. I was planning to go to a movie by myself this weekend, but I just didn't want to miss out on spending time with my daughter in the end. I find it hard to enjoy the "me time" because the "us time" is becoming so rare and precious.

Vegemite - posted on 04/11/2011

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Heather I thought i was the only crazy person who likes going to the dentist.

Vegemite - posted on 04/11/2011

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probably 3 times a year i stay at a hotel in the city by myself for a night or 2. mmmmmm tv and room service. haha

Jocelyn - posted on 04/11/2011

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I work nights at a bar; THAT is my me time lol. Adult conversation, live music, karaoke, free drinks and ego boosting customers...yep it's pretty good lol

Mel - posted on 04/11/2011

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yeah thats a good point. I find with 2 I cant really do alot of housework while the kid are awake. Sometimes I do like today, so that now when they are both asleep I can relax, but I feel guilty about cleaning while the little ones awake becaise shes still so young. Im able to do photos and that when the toddlers awake shes happy to sit and watch a dvd, or do painting or go on the swing set

Stifler's - posted on 04/11/2011

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I only have one kid though. I have all the other hours he's awake to do housework, but I can't concentrate on putting photos in albums or scrapbooking or a tv show if he is awake so I do fun things only during nap time and potter around doing stuff and playing the rest of the day.

Mel - posted on 04/11/2011

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that sounds like a dream Emma I so wish I could live like that, no house work in nap time that would be awesome :)

Mel - posted on 04/11/2011

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my husband is the only way. Or nights when Im not busy I come on facebook. Thats my me time. My hubby is great on the weekends. I really need the time to sit down and get things done without worrying about babies. I dont go out at all except food shopping pretty much. Every party we go too is cut short because of my youngest being grumpy or tired not wanting to be held constantly etc

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I have me time at night after the girls are in bed and asleep. I play on here, take a shower, then bedtime routine, read in bed, and watch the television until I fall asleep. My tv will turn off by itself & DH just snores to loud so I have been getting our queen bed to myself while he sleeps in the spare. ugh! I can't sleep with his snores. lol

Stifler's - posted on 04/10/2011

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I have heaps of me time lol. Nap time is my time, no housework allowed. When Damian is home we don't discuss anything, I just leave the house when I feel like it and go shopping if I don't want to take Logan with me. Logan goes to bed at 7 so I shower, do a mask, watch tv, whatever and I don't do any housework after then either. I clock off and the only thing I do is wash sippy cups if it's urgent or load the dishwasher if we've gotten home late from somewhere. I refuse to be a slave in my own home.

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I posted a really long response, but then realized it was tmi.... so I'll just do it shorter. Nope, not really.

Jenny - posted on 04/10/2011

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Are you going to do something special for yourself while they are gone Teresa?

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My friend takes my girls to the beach every time he takes his kids (usually averages once a week) If my son takes a nap while they are gone.... me time. :) If not.... no me time. :( Another friend of mine took the girls to a movie today. My son only napped for an hour though, so I only got about halfway through my movie. No clue when I'm going to get to finish it......

I will be getting 4 weeks of me time this summer while the kids are w/ my ex. I have a feeling I'm not ever going to want 'me time' again after that.......

Jenny - posted on 04/10/2011

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I take a couple hours a night of me time as everyone is sleeping by around 9 and I'm a night owl. If I don't have some time everyday to decompress I can get cranky.

Today I actually got an entire afternoon. My partner took the kids to Granny's while he built her a fence. I went garden shop touring. It was great. I can't remember the last time I was alone during the day.

Bonnie - posted on 04/10/2011

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I get about an hour on the computer in the morning and another 30 minutes in the afternoon sometimes. Otherwise my 'me time' usually starts at around 9 or 10pm and I usually stay up until around 12 or 1am.

Rosie - posted on 04/10/2011

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i get me time every day when lucas naps (which have been disappearing alot lately) from 1:30-3:30 ish. i veg and play on the computer for a while and watch soaps.



sometimes i go out with my friends, it's been decreasing alot lately though. my bestie is really busy with her job (she's a teacher at a local college), and i don't have much free time when she does.

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I am usually cleaning, taking care of gabby, cooking or studying. My school work is computer based so i get COM time every so often while studying. Other than that, i have a hard time squeezing in a shower, let alone time to veg...unless i stay up past bedtime...which ive been doing quite a bit of lately..

Tah - posted on 04/10/2011

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All the time, I make it a point, true my situation is a little different as my older two are in school and my youngest in daycare, so nowadays, it's during that time, gym, nap, study, karate..whatever I like, my classes are only a couple days a week as I'm almost done with them so it leaves plenty o playtime..lol. But at 3pm when I hear those keys in the door it's all mommy business. I pick up a couple days of week of work so I don't lose my mind, but usually weekends since I can't come in before 830 because of the kids and can't really work till midnight with a navy husband with a crazy schedule to boot. My mom raised 10 and she tells us all the time, take care of you because if not, who will take care of them when you break down

Lady Heather - posted on 04/10/2011

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Oh, last year I discovered a really good way to get me time. Go to the dentist. I just had a basic cleaning and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I'm due for another appointment at the dental spa in the next couple months. Yay!

Johnny - posted on 04/10/2011

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Between work and my daughter, "me time" has pretty much gone out the window. My husband takes her to karate once a week so I run out for groceries then. Otherwise, if I'm lucky she naps when I don't have housework to do. I also tend to take a little break just after she's gone down to sleep. If I do too much cleaning or banging about right then, she wakes. So I wait about 45 minutes to start my cooking or cleaning.

I was injured by my chiropractor a few weeks ago, so last week I went to see a massage therapist for an hour. I did have babysitting for that and it was a real treat. I even went for coffee by myself after. Very relaxing :))

Erin - posted on 04/10/2011

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What is this 'me time' you speak of? And how can I find some? ;)

I'm a single mum. The only time I have is after my 2yo goes to bed (around 8pm), and I've finished all the jobs I can't get done in those intensive last few hours before bedtime.

April - posted on 04/10/2011

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The only "me time" I get is if our son takes a nap or goes to bed early. If he goes to bed on time, I can't be too far behind him because he wakes up frequently most nights. I agree with Pia: 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep-- BLISS! :)

Pia - posted on 04/10/2011

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I'm alone way too much in the evening. My partner goes to bed at 5pm because of his job, so I sit and veg a lot, but when I do I'm stressing about whether my kids will actually sleep that night!! I'm cursed with bad sleepers. I would rather my me time be 4 hours of uniterrupted sleep...bliss.

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I tend to do fairly well for me time (I'm taking advantage it will be difficult when the baby arrives). Ethan goes to bed anywhere between 6.15 and 7pm and after that I may do a little cleaning up to make less work the next day but generally I sit and do whatever I fancy doing, hubby goes to the gym and does his sports after Ethan goes to bed so I m getting a lot of time alone in the evenings. Generally we go to bed around 10ish (but I can't always last, what with being nearly 7 months pregnant and having a 17 month old).

On a Sunday my hubby takes Ethan swimming and I go along and sit in the coffee place and have a drink, chill and read my book for an hour (and watch them having loads of fun together it's lovely).

Lady Heather - posted on 04/10/2011

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My husband usually does something on the weekends with Freja - right now they are out getting groceries. So I'm just sitting here. Once a week I go out to my favourite coffee shop and to me that is just sitting there because I bring my Kobo and get a nice drink and just read for a good couple of hours. We have pretty relaxing evenings here though. Freja is in bed at 7:30. Then my husband goes to bed at 10. Usually I join him, but sometimes I stay up another hour if there's something good on tv.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 04/10/2011

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That is when I have me time as well, but its like 11-2am and I watch my tv shows that I missed during the day, because Yo Gabba Gabba and Sesame Street were on. I am a bit tired in the morning, but its nice to chill and have some tea

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