People who use In Vitro Fertilization

Janessa - posted on 09/23/2010 ( 17 moms have responded )

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I have watched shows like kate and jone plus eight,quints by suprise, and so. Why are there so many shows about these people. Have anyone ever wondered why? Anways all these people do is complain how they are struggling because having all these kids all at once. If these folks can afford In Vitro Fertilization why can't they afford to take care of there kids. I mean when they took In Vitro Fertilization it is a very high chances of having more then one so what did they excepted. Those kinds of people get so much free help, diapers, cribs ect donated to them and they choice to have that many kids using In Vitro Fertilization. My parents adopted 4 kids no one helped them and they were not that well off no one gave us college funds, donated diapers, clothes and so on for people who adopt all of kids who would never have a home. spotlights are never shown on adoptive parents who adopt allot of children. My parents knew a few couple that adopted at least 16 kids. Why can't those people get help or have they own tv shows like those idiots above.

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Becky - posted on 09/24/2010

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I don't have any problem with asking for and accepting help. I do have a problem with exploiting your children by putting them on a television show for the rest of the world to stare at like they're some kind of freak of nature. I don't like or watch any of those shows.

Mary - posted on 09/26/2010

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Janessa, I would like to point out that John & Kate's multiples are NOT a result of IVF, but just fertility drugs. Octomom's are the result of an unethical doctor's willingness to implant an insane number of embryos into a crazy woman's uterus. High order multiples are NOT the normal outcome with IVF; the current practice of reputable reproductive endocrinologists is to implant only two embryos in any given cycle in order to optimize the chances of success as well as to reduce the risk of high order multiples. The bulk of high order multiples are the result of taking fertility drugs alone, such as clomid. Although the risk of multiples is greater, many people start out with this option because it is less expensive, less invasive, and less time intensive than an IVF cycle. Although the risk of multiples is always explained, the truth is, no one really believes it will happen to them...until that first sono shows all those little heartbeats.

As for adoption...it is just not the right option for some. As someone who went through multiple rounds of IUI and IVF, I can tell you that I couldn't even consider it until I had exhausted every attempt at trying to conceive a baby of my own. It's not that I couldn't love a child that wasn't genetically mine...it was that I wanted the full experience of pregnancy and childbirth as well. The mere existence of fertility treatments gives women like me hope that we can have what most of us take for granted as an inherent right of womanhood. Until that hope is exhausted, many of us cannot even begin to consider adoption as an alternate means of becoming a mother. Unless you have been in this situation, it may be hard to understand that longing, or why adoption is not the first option considered.

I admire those who choose to adopt. I understand how your personal experience would make you in favor of adoption over fertility treatments...but I don't think it gives you the right to judge couples who choose fertility treatments over adoption, especially if you have not walked in their shoes. I am not a fan of the reality show parents of multiples, but please do not make the mistake of assuming that they are representative of all (or even any) of the couples who end up with multiples as a result of fertility treatments. The majority of them are NOT on TV, and are not getting any aid outside of their own family and friends.

I also have ot ask, since you feel so strongly about adoption, and think that couples who adopt are "...actually helping the world way more..." - did you yourself adopt instead choosing to bring a biological offspring into the world?

Carolee - posted on 09/24/2010

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I don't think it selfish at all. I have watched my sister try to cope with not being able to have a child of her own while her friends and younger sister (me) have children of their own with no issues. She's had to go through 3 horrible miscarriages (tubal pregnancies) that ended up leaving her with only half of one fallopian tube. Her only chance of having a child of her own is IVF.

They had looked into adoption, but it would cost more, and there is an age restriction. She's not only had to deal with people who do not either know or understand her situation make (sometimes un-knowingly) rude comments about her and her husband not having kids yet and what each of them thinks they should do about "their situation". It has gotten to the point that her own mother-in-law has called her worthless and has tried (for the entire decade that they have been married) to come between my sister and her husband!

And assuming or thinking that all people who choose IVF for any reason they might have are like those people you see on TV is like saying all Germans are like Hitler. Yes, unfortunately, some of them are, but the vast majority are just good people trying to live their lives in whatever way will make them happiest.

Janessa - posted on 09/25/2010

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I get all of your points but i have to agree more with Sharon Grey. I guess i am at a different view points since i was adopted and i know many people who have adopted many child. These people do not get help at all and they are actually helping the world way more then these couple poping out 5-8 children all at once. I just think more help needed for people who adopt many children then those who choice to have ivf and get many children all at once. My parents adopted in america they were no waiting list for them because they adopted a black baby girl maybe more people need to be less racist and look at each other as humans and adopt. Plus all those people do is bitch when so many adoptive parents get no help they are saving one life at a time or more.

Ez - posted on 09/24/2010

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I think it's important to understand these celebrity families are exceptions, rather than the rule. Most couples who utilise IVF certainly don't do it with the intention of seeking fame and handouts.

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17 Comments

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Kim - posted on 09/26/2010

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I didn't do invitro I did IUI but I had 6 eggs ready before my trigger shot and I had to agree to possibly needing a reduction. At the time I kind of blew it off, I had been trying for over 3 yrs to get and stay pregnant. I ended up almost losing my one. After seeing about Octomom etc, I was like ooo that could have been me. But with Invitro you don't have to add that many eggs especially when you have so many children already!

Lindsay - posted on 09/26/2010

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I haven't read any of the replies but I would like to go ahead and say that these couples you have listed did not use IVF. They used IUI which from my understanding is not as pricey as IVF and usually a method that is persued before IVF is.

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I admire couples who do this..i watched a really good but very emotional show of couples doing this and the go through so much.Its fantastic to see them finally get there and to see there joy at the end of it as the hold there child or children is amazing.Not all parents who do this are like those people on the shows you have watched.Many have the means to care for there children or child most have been preparing for there children for years.They know the risk of more than one baby and to many thats a bonus and many just want a child so much the still go for it and are ready for what happens.BEST OF LUCK JENNY.:-)

Sharon - posted on 09/24/2010

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If you choose to have 8 kids at once, you'd better have a plan in place to support those 8 kids without counting on reality tv shows to carry you.

If you have crank out 8 kids, at once or one at a time, you'd damn well better have a plan to support them, without welfare.

I am NOT against welfare. Shit happens. Things go wrong and you need help, take it, use it. But if you don't have a highschool education and didn't marry bill gates, shut the baby factory down.

Alahnna - posted on 09/24/2010

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I think most of the reason we see so many shows about this these days is because reality TV sells. All the reality shows like Big Brother, Survivor, Bachelor, America's got talent, etc. They make big money, so everyone is trying to get in on it, why not show off the multiple babies and get tons of freebies from sympathetic people?

User - posted on 09/24/2010

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I'm about to start an IVF cycle in the next few months. I know mulitples are an option, and that doesn't change my mind about wanting a child with my husband. The people on tv exploit their children to an extent, not everyone that uses extraordinary measures to have a kid is evil.

Jenni - posted on 09/24/2010

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I think i may be a bit judgemental about this topic but I haven't been in a situation where I'd have to consider it, maybe i'd feel differently if i was. It just doesn't sit right with me. Probably because there are so many children who have no one and need to be adopted. As adorable as multiples are I don't think it's very healthy for mothers or children to have 3 or more. Even twins are usually considered to be a much higher risk pregnancy. Having 6-8 is like having a litter of puppies. It just seems so unnatural to me.
And i'm going to be a little callous here; but the world is all ready well overpopulated and factoring in all the children in the world who are in desperate need of a loving home, I find it a tad selfish.

Serena - posted on 09/24/2010

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I believe that there was a fad of these multiples but as a whole people are starting to tune out. I know that I am over it, I was turned off when Jon and Kate started thinking of themselves first and forgot about their children.
I would like to give these families that ask for help or have these shows the benefit of the doubt that they just really wanted to have a baby and God just blessed them 6 times...
But don't get me started on Octomom, she is a head trip all in herself. I just hope that her children can find a way to grow up as functioning members of society.

Rosie - posted on 09/24/2010

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i guess i don't really think that it's these parents fault. it's the media, and our society for clammoring over them. and the more media coverage they get, the more they are going to get people to help them, it's our human nature to try to help those in need.
it's not very common to have as many kids as these people have, even with fertility treatments. i can't find all stats, but i found the stats for quadruplets with ivf, and it 1 in 7500 chance. considering not that many people are having ivf, that's pretty damn low.
i agree there should be more shows about people who adopt, that would be great to see. but i guess i don't blame these people for accepting help when they need it.

Elisabeth - posted on 09/24/2010

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There is nothing wrong with someone asking for help when they need it. IVF is only a drop in the ocean compared to raising just one child until the age of 18+, let alone 4, 6 or 8. Most don't plan to actually have 8 children, my friend had 28 eggs harvested in order to have children, she had 3 implanted each time, she gave birth to one baby and donated the other 22, this is what usually happens but if the couple are having more difficulty then more eggs will be implanted. If someone couldn't afford to look after one child after using IVF then maybe that is a reason to scratch ones head, but there is no need to look down on people just because things didn't go quite as planned and it becomes a bit harder to finacially get by. Think about it, people everywhere (this site a perfect example) complain about how hard things are emotionally and finacially when they only have one or two children, let alone 8. I perfer to try and understand their situation rather then judge and complain about them.

?? - posted on 09/24/2010

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Did anyone else see the "Octomom" interview on Oprah?

It was interesting. Her voice and laugh are freakin annoying.

Amie - posted on 09/24/2010

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I'm sure if there were adoptive parents who wanted to jump at the fame, they would.

The people on these shows are not the majority when it comes to couples who use invitro. I don't begrudge them extra help, if they need it. I also don't think they need to put their children in the spotlight like they do, that's just greedy.

There are some who are complete retards, like Octomom. Instead of taking care of the kids she had, she went and had more then asked for donations. =/ Retard, that's all she is.

They get on t.v. and the hand outs though because a lot of people get drawn in.

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