Racial tensions.........

Jennifer - posted on 05/07/2012 ( 14 moms have responded )

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So the Trayvon Martin case has settled down some, Zimmerman is in jail, thankfully, and will get his day in court. After all that has been said and done, we still have no idea(really) whether Zimmerman is racist or not, but we do know that the media really pushed this angle.

So, I'm curious, what do the ladies here think about racism?

For me, I think one of the problems is that we don't want to admit our bais feelings anymore. We don't want to admit that there are any differences in people of different races. We want to push all stereotyping under the rug, and pretend that everything is perfectly fine. I think we NEED to do the oppisite.

I can see a differance between black people and myself that goes beyond skin color, their bodies are built different. I can hear a difference in the way they talk, many still feel a need to change their speech patterns with other groups. They have different feelings about things. They look at things in a different way than I do. Why is it so bad to admit that we are different?

I have friends of many different backgrounds. It has always been a sign that we are moving into a deeper friendship when we start talking about how we are different. Once a friend is comfortable enough to say, "I disagree" I know we are really friends. I don't think race relations will ever get better in America until we as a society can say that to each other!

Please, debate away, but be nice!!

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Lady Heather - posted on 05/07/2012

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I think there is a difference between cultural and racial that you are not recognizing. A person doesn't inherently talk differently because of their skin colour. If I adopt a baby of another race they will speak like me and probably think more like because they will be influenced by me. The goal should be a certain respect for cultural differences while at the same time resisting the urge to stereotype all of one race as the same.

None of my black friends ever spoke differently from me. Well not the ones from here. I had some university friends who were recent immigrants from various African nations and they all spoke like the people they grew up with. There isn't a black way of talking. Just picking away at your one example.

**Jackie** - posted on 05/09/2012

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Yes, it's Lockdown. I don't watch it but I was speaking of statistics, not TV. I thought a cracker is a derogatory term for a white person. Oops lol I just call people turds or ass hats, seems to work no matter what color you are. I should ask my husband how he spells "colo(u)r"

Jennifer - posted on 05/08/2012

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I do recognize cultural differences, trust me! I'm from the South. I speak with a pronounced accent. Culturally, I have more in common with the blacks, Hispanics, Asians and Arabs raised here, then I do with whites from other parts of the US. I have more in common with my Mexican born neighbor, than my uncle from PA. BUT, my neighbor still looks at things differently because he is 'Mexican'. He gets treated different. When he was stopped recently for speeding, the cop acted like he was crimanial, or illegal. It is embarassing to me that he gets treated that way, but I can at least see why it happens, even if it isn't fair.

I probably didn't make my point clear on the 'talking' part, anyway. I meant that a group of black people will talk more openelly to each other, but if white people are around, they are more careful of things they say, not that they actually speak differently. Although, sometimes they do that too!

As for a woman avoiding a black male while alone, there was a study that showed even black woman are more apt to avoid a young black 'gansta' male than a well dressed, clean cut white male. I will see if I can find that article......but that is some of the stuff I think we should be talking about! We all fear the same things, so why don't we start being honest about it!

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MeMe - Raises Her Hand (-_-) (Mommy Of A Toddler And Teen) - posted on 05/09/2012

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Actually, it is the prisons in the States that I often have watched on TV. It is a reality show. It's called Lockdown (I believe)... Maybe the channel is racist too and doesn't show all the blacks! lol Goodness only knows, right?



A cracker (jack) is a crackhead, BTW. ;)



I don't see why no one else can use the same name they often call themselves. Meh. White's that wanna be black (the wanna be rapper's), call themselves wigger's...pffffttt



However, I am so not a fan of the N word either, my husband says it every once in awhile and it drives me! I just fail to see why they can call themselves it but if anyone else does, they are racist. Of course, I am not saying I want to be able to call them any name but their first name. It is just a question I have always had.

**Jackie** - posted on 05/09/2012

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Sorry, yes I was speaking about the states. Here, there are waaaaaay more blacks than whites in prison...like waaaaaay more.

Also, you are soooo right about whites who are desperately trying to act like their favorite rapper. I'm not a fan of the (and I won't write it because people are so easily offended nowadays) the N word. It is just a made up word. I wouldn't be upset if someone called me a cracker. Who cares? Good job not coming up with a better rebuttal.

MeMe - Raises Her Hand (-_-) (Mommy Of A Toddler And Teen) - posted on 05/09/2012

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I have no issue with what colour anyone is. However, it is unfortunate that YES colour DOES make a difference, in society. I do have black friends, which are very sweet people BTW but I also have come into contact with more blacks than I can count that ARE fucked right up! Although, with that said, I have come in contact with just as many white hooligans that THINK and ACT just as messed. They walk around like a wanna be black rapper, talk smack and will shoot your ass, if you look at them wrong. They even talk with a black slang accent. Thank the media/music video's and whatever else, for that one. **rolls eyes**



I honestly, think it is these "kids" that are causing the racism. I mean there are numerous wonderful black people, very stand up citizens but then you come across a pack of them that are running around with their pants to their knees, big ass chains around their necks, pics in their hair and lollipops hanging out of their mouths. Every second word is FUCK and NIGGA! They're trying to sell you drugs and are rude as hell. Come on, if you don't want to be put into a category then ACT normal!



I don't think they are in trouble any more than any other race or any worse, for that matter. Perhaps in the States. Here, where I live, there are a plentiful of Caucasian's that are crazy ass, retarded (depending on where you are - in a bad area of the city, it doesn't matter what colour they are). They will knife you if you get too close. The only problem is, more times than not, they are not noticed as much as a black person. So, yes, there is racism. Honestly, I don't like it. Now, ask my husband and he will talk very disrespectfully about the black man. I have had to tell him to bite his tongue, more times than not. ;)



While it can be true that certain races think and act differently than one another, I think it all depends on their culture but mostly, how and where they were raised. Black people tend to be much more poorer and live in not so nice ways. But, I watch a lot of prison shows and I see way more Caucasian and Hispanics, than black.



Oh and BTW - Zimmerman has been acquitted, as of late (the other day - Monday I think). I seriously do not think it was about race, here. I think it was about a lunatic looking for trouble (Zimmerman). I think he completely misconstrued Trayvon and jumped to conclusions. I truly think that if Trayvon had been white, Zimmerman would have still done the same thing, I just think Zimmerman would have been in jail immediately, rather than waiting until after the media and people put up such a stink, to see him jailed. Again, racism? Yep.

**Jackie** - posted on 05/09/2012

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Stifler's Mum, I'm cracking up...I know you weren't trying to be funny but your comment was the last one that I read (I started from the first one posted) and by the time I got to yours, I was thinking the saaaaaaaaaame thing you were.



SO here we go, Zimmerman is only ONE case out of many so knock it off. Just a week ago there were two black teens that beat the shit out of a white guy and even told police that it was for Trayvon...you're going to have to look hard for that article, cnn.com only gave it a teeny tiny write up and a link so small I had to put my glasses on.



I would LOVE to not be worried about who my daughter is friends with and worry about whether they are black (go ahead and make a face). MOST black guys that I grew up with were juvenile delinquents and constantly yelled at the teachers and were down right disrespectful to girls. MOST black girls had an attitude that would startle even the rudest little twit and a mouth on them that would require a translator. My parents did not raise me to dislike people based on color or judge people by their looks btw.



When I was 18 I was promoted to a night time supervisor position at my very first job (I was jazzed) and I quit 6 months later. My night time shift had 15 people...13 were black. My job was to assign areas of clean up to each person and to make the chart of when everyone took their 15 minute breaks. I would have to go into the break room after 25-30 minutes to tell them break time was over and I would get mocked or called a name. One night I told a girl that she had an area to clean up and she told me I was "whack". To be completely honest, I was scared of her. I was 5 ft and 110 lbs and yeah she was bigger than me and I was scared. We were 20ish minutes from closing that night and her area looked terrible. She was in the break room on the phone and I asked her to please get to her department because I'd like to go home. She got lippy with me and I just walked out because I was not about to let her ruin my promotion. Two nights later, she and her friends jumped me. I took a week off but when I came back to work I still had a bit of a black eye. Her friends made fun of me all night. I tried to stand my ground and not let them get to me. I made a joke about how $10/hour wasn't worth it but I was heartbroken. I quit a few days later.



So yeah, in my experience alone, along with jail statistics, most blacks are different than I. I wish they were not. I know that I am partly the reason why "racism" exists. I accept that. Do I wish harm on anyone? No way. I'm just rational.

Stifler's - posted on 05/09/2012

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I think more people didn't comment on this... because they afraid of sounding racist. Anything anyone does these days is racist or culturally insensitive and even trying to be sensitive and using PC terms makes you look racist.

Katherine - posted on 05/08/2012

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I don't think it's a race issue at all IMO. He shot the boy because he's an asshole. What race is he? He is a minority too. And it definitely is cultural not a race thing. I think he was just aggravated and if it's true that he was making racist remarks then he deserves jail. He deserves it no matter what.

No one wil ever know what was going through his mind. For some reason he wanted that boy dead. And he wanted to make SURE he was dead, because even though he was told to wait for "back-up" he still proceeded on his own.

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i absolutely think people need to talk about their differences more because they are there and people notice them. some people claim to be colorblind which i absolutely don't believe in. people may not want to openly admit their biases and sterotyping but everyone does it. it's just how people are, we like to be able to group people into neat categories of good vs bad, etc to make ourselves feel safer. my son is half black and half white and i am completely aware of the fact that he will be considered black regardless of how light he is or how 'white" his features may be. i don't think that people will ever get to a point where they are completely unbiased but if we can get to a point where we acknowledge our individual biases and are still able to treat everyone fairly and respectfully regardless of whatever bias or stereotype we may have against them that would be a good place to get to.

Karen - posted on 05/08/2012

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They dug up Zimmerman's old myspace page that hadn't been updated since 2006, and found lots of racist remarks. The media pushed it because it's true. He was a racist idiot who thought he had some kind of power he could abuse. People like him enrage me because I feel like we take a few steps forward in this country, and then someone like him does something stupid to set us back and pull us apart.

Treat people how you want to be treated. That phrase is something I have always been told by my mother. It's so simple, but apparently really hard for some people. We don't know if we choose the life we got. I don't think I chose the skin color I am in, and neither did anyone else. We get what we get. I don't and never will understand how someone can choose to not like someone just because they are sporting a different color.

I always want to know more about other people and where they come from. I love people who are not sensitive about it, who can openly talk about their differences. Like you said Jennifer, it's always a good sign you are moving into a deeper friendship when you can talk about your differences. That's actually my favorite part about making new friends is when we graduate to that level.

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Your culture should not be tied to your skin color. Actions speak louder than words.

Also, like Denikka said, I wouldn't avoid a person just because they're black, but if it was a guy and I was alone and he looked menacing then yeah, I'd probably find some way to nonchalantly get away. I do it whatever color guy it is. Hell, I do it with women too! I just don't do well with people.

My family used to be racist and my husband's family is to a point but we both were like, this is stupid, you're not teaching our daughter to make fun of other people for being different, or to be hateful just because they aren't the same color as her. So they aren't that way around us at least.

And I totally agree, Will Smith has always been on my list for my male harem.

Denikka - posted on 05/07/2012

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I think racism is a card being played too often. At least in my experience.
I grew up in a town that had a large population of natives. Any slight, and many of them (that I knew) would say that the other person was racist. Many that I knew had a huge sense of entitlement based purely on their race. So I do have a slight bias going in to meet a native person that they'll be like that. On the same note, every girl named Sarah that I've personally known has been pretty stuck up and back stabby, so I'm always cautious meeting a new person named Sarah for exactly the same reason. My experience has told me *this* is often true. Approach with caution. But don't auto judge just because of other experiences. Let each person make their own mistakes, within reason of course.

At this point, I am so tired of all the race bullshit. There are always going to be stereotypes. Always. Whether it be from your own personal experience or from out in the world in general. And I don't think that's necessarily a BAD thing. If you get bit by a dog you're probably going to have some bias either against dogs in general, that particular breed, or sometimes, to an extreme, all animals.
I personally think that as long as you don't let the stereotypes in your own mind cloud your judgement to the exclusion of all else, whatever.
Just as an example, I'm not generally attracted to black men. I wouldn't turn someone down based solely on the fact that they were black. And there ARE black men that I do find attractive (mmm..Will Smith XD) but as a general rule. . .I feel the same way about short guys.
To me, race has about the same importance as height, eye or hair color. Just about none. It's about the persons behavior and who they are. If I see a black guy who looks all gangster and intimidating, I'm probably going to cross the road. Not because he's black. I would react the same to a white, Hispanic, Asian or purple guy from Mars.

I would LOVE if more people put more emphasis on culture and heritage than on race. Culture is something to embrace. Be proud of your roots. Race/skin color shouldn't matter any more than eye color.

Beth - posted on 05/07/2012

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There are definitely some major cultural difference between groups in this country. And yes, many of them fall along racial lines. Stereotypes exist for this very reason. However, they are ONLY stereotypes. It's ok to acknowledge the differences between the races, but you must allow space for people that don't fall into these stereotypical categories. That's what happened with Zimmerman, in my opinion: he saw a young black man out at night, wearing a hoodie, acting in a manner that Zimmerman perceived as suspicious, and he made a snap judgment that ruined both of their lives. This is the problem: the snap judgements. Culturally I think we have found a way to live side by side. But, we can't seem to get our brains around the people of other races that don't fit the mold that society would really like to put them in.

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