Rapunzel and homeschooling

Merry - posted on 06/13/2011 ( 138 moms have responded )

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I didn't write this, but I feel quite similarly to this mom.
Now this article touches on Christianity a bit, but if possible, could we not turn this into religion debate? Please? :) I know most here are not Christians, so if possible let's just debate homeschooling, not religion.......

Recently, I watched Disney's "Tangled" with my family. Mother Gothel, the movie's villain, keeps Rapunzel locked in a tower, supposedly to protect her from people who would steal her precious gift -- her hair. In one song, Mother Gothel assures Rapunzel that danger lurks outside the tower and that she must stay in the tower forever to avoid the hurt and drama of a world too frightening for her to handle. As I watched the movie, I jokingly said, "Isn't this why we homeschool?"

Although my husband chuckled at my comment, I did consider whether my reasons for homeschooling bore any resemblance to the self-serving motives of the movie's villain. Many people stereotype homeschooling parents as overprotective and controlling, and indeed, in some cases, this accusation may be true. However, as I discovered when I first researched homeschooling as an option for our family, people who homeschool vary as greatly as people who send their children to private or public schools. As one of the diverse group of parents who chooses to homeschool, how do my motives measure up? Am I doing what is best for my children, or am I tiptoeing closer to the Mother Gothel method of child-rearing?

On one hand, all healthy parents protect their children. To some extent, I do desire to shelter my kids from anything that might harm their developing identities and faith, such as bullies, inappropriate conversations and labels. I want to influence them at their most moldable age, cultivating a strong faith and value system that will enable them to withstand peer pressure and make right choices when they grow older.

However, my children are still quite young. They still need to hold my hand when they cross the street. If they reach adulthood without me ever allowing them the freedom to test their beliefs or permitting them to move beyond my arm's reach, then the healthy shelter of our home would become no better than Rapunzel's imprisoning tower. I do want to build a strong faith in my kids, but I want them to test that faith and make it their own long before they leave home. For this reason, even though I homeschool partly out of a desire to minimize negative influences, my protection will decrease, and their freedom will increase, as my children grow up.

In fact, as I consider my motives, I realize that my main reasons for homeschooling come from freedom and not overprotection.

First, I want to free my children from labels. In order to accommodate a variety of kids, schools dispense many labels. Fidgety little boys become known as troublemakers. Intelligent students are "gifted," which seems positive, but as a former "gifted" student, I felt pressured to only pursue academics and not the art degree I desired, even though I now do more art than academics. As an "advanced" student, I believed that art should remain a hobby, while my intellect should become my identity. Moreover, peers label each other, often in harmful ways: geek, klutz, clown, different, unpopular. I want my children to cultivate their own interests and abilities, without having to fit into a predetermined mold created by the school or their classmates.

Similarly, I appreciate that homeschooling allows my children to work at an individual pace, regardless of age or grade. My daughter completed two full math books this year, because she grasped the concepts quickly and enjoyed her work. My son barely finished one. He understood addition well, but I realized, halfway through, that he was counting the numbers in his head instead of memorizing the facts. I stopped working through the book to practice the facts until he could solve them quickly, without counting. With individual instruction, the kids can work quickly or pursue in-depth projects in their strengths and spend extra time mastering their weaknesses.

Additionally, my children have the freedom to learn outside of a school building. This year, we studied at a cabin in the woods, Malabar Farm, the zoo, the theater, museums and more. The kids attended a homeschool co-op, took ballet classes, and used math to double a recipe from China, which we cooked as part of a geography unit on Asia. Homeschooling gives us the freedom to learn creatively, outside of the classroom.

After much thought, I concluded that, unlike Mother Gothel, I desire to help my children leave their protective tower. Through creative instruction and exploration, I hope to help them become wise adults, capable of taking on a sometimes scary world, of thinking critically and making their own choices. I do not homeschool in order to hoard these precious gifts for myself. Instead, I desire to nurture them and release them, so they can use their gifts to make a difference in the world.

Karen Pryor, a homeschooling mother with three children, has a degree in history from Grove City College in Pennsylvania. She is a part-time photographer and graphic designer. You can comment at karenpryor03@gmail.com.

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Alison - posted on 06/15/2011

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I loved the author's post. @ Laura, do you think more homeschooled kids are falling through the cracks than public schooled kids? And asking parent educators to live up to certain standards or their kids have to go to public school assumes that public schools are better, and in many cases they aren't. Additionally, regulating homeschooling is regulating parenting. I don't think the government should step in unless the parent is actually doing something wrong and not before. If you wanted to pull your child out of school because he/she was being harassed, but the school wouldn't let you because you couldn't pass an English test, wouldn't you be mad about that? Or maybe your ADHD son was falling 2 grade levels behind, but you couldn't pull him out of school because you couldn't pass a science test? Homeschooled kids do well academically, better than public schooled kids (on average), regardless of the parent's education level, regardless of the amount of state regulation, regardless of race, and spending much less per year on homeschooling than taxes do for public schooled kids. I can see how that's threatening. I don't want to see children abused, but it drives me crazy when people jump to more regulations as an answer. Why don't we legally require parents to have their pre-school age kids checked every so often to make sure they're not being abusive? Crappy parents are the problem, not homeschooling. And for my assertions about homeschooled kids doing better, the link is http://homeschool.calvertschool.org/abou... and anyone who is interested can download the white paper. I know that was a bit of tirade. My kids aren't even school-aged yet, but I've done a lot of research on homeschooling. I have a friend that homeschools, one of my sisters in homeschooling, one doing virtual school, and I'm considering homeschooling my kids.

Merry - posted on 06/15/2011

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I'd be more worried about the 0-6 year olds getting abused, if the parent doesn't have to be regulated for the first 6 years, why then would they need regulating after the kid is 6?
If a 7 year old homeschooled kid is getting abused it's likely been going on years before the homeschooling started.

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I like the concept of homeschooling. I would do it myself except that we live in a fabulous school district that has a lot to offer. It's true that society sees homeschooling as parents being overprotective. But like the article says, children are allowed to learn at their own pace and focus on that which interests them. I'm going to send my kids to public school, but I feel I can do many of the things in the article without homeschooling. We can spend weekends at the zoo and museums and cooking recipes from China. I can supplement what they are learning in school and help them develop their own interests and talents.

Tara - posted on 06/16/2011

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My completely homeschooled children just came home from performing in a stage production of "willy wonka, the musical". They have been attending rehearsals for over 10 weeks, they have been around schooled kids the whole time.
They did amazing, my 8 year old had a singing solo, which she nailed.
My kids also take figure skating, cooking and sewing classes and art lessons, not to mention theatre and voice coaching, and guitar playing etc.
My kids are very socially mature, they are comfortable with anyone age newborn to 90. They can hold their own in conversations with just about anybody and they are outgoing and fun, they have no issues with socialization with schooled kids or homeschooled kids, just like they have no issue with socializing with the post office staff or the gas attendant. They are polite, articulate and intelligent and it shows all the time.
I don't homeschool to protect my children from public school Dyan, I don't see it the big bad ugly, I just feel that I can provide a more well rounded, individualized learning environment, I can teach to their personal style of learning, be it auditory, visual or kinesthetic. I can ensure they don't slip through the cracks and move onto grade level work that they don't understand just because everyone else has already learned it, I can also move them ahead when they have mastered a concept thereby avoiding apathy about learning.
I want my kids to know *how* to learn, how to source information, how to gather it and present it, how to use it, how to make it work for you, how to deliver it, and most importantly I want them to LOVE learning.
And by letting them learn in an environment that is free of cortisol inducing elements, such as bullying, sexually inappropriate activities, inability to grasp what is being taught, distractions from external elements etc. etc. I am giving them a better opportunity to really learn things, on a core level, not just for a short time until it can be regurgitated on a test. I want them to remember what they learn.
What is the point of filling their brains with information that they do not need at the time it is taught. If a child is taught how the US system of Gov. is taught when they are in grade 3, more often than not that information will not be retained. They don't need to know that at that age.
Learning is not about teaching, learning is not about indoctrination, learning should not be forced, for forced learning only leads to a desire to have approval, not to a love of learning.
I am by no means saying that people can simply leave things out, what I am saying is that I have control over when my kids learn things. I know that they have absolutely no need to know how a bill is passed in Canadian Parliament at their current ages, I will not teach this information now, it will come later in their studies when we start looking more into politics and government etc. etc.
Or earlier if they ask, but right now I'm pretty confident that they will be A-Okay if I don't teach that particular part of the curriculum at this current juncture in time.
Dyan, no one has said they are protecting their kids from the big bad world.
Your knowledge of the broader range and diversity of homeschoolers is a disadvantage when forming an opinion of them.
And for whoever said that I likely don't know any homeschoolers who have their kids locked up in towers etc., I just wanted to add that even if you had more regulation, a parent who keeps their kids locked in towers or who doesn't teach their daughter to read etc. are not going to get caught in that safety net, they are going to fly under the radar. Those are the kinds of parents who don't enroll their children in school at all, the kind where the neighbours say things like "we didn't even know they had children" etc.

And just so you know, as a homeschooler, I do find it a tad offensive to say that people who keep their kids in cages or basements etc. is homeschooling. This is absurd and insulting. They are not homeschooling their children. And whether the kids went to school or not, what the parents were doing is not homeschooling, it's child neglect.

Albert Einstein said
"Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school"

April - posted on 06/16/2011

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I'd love to homeschool because I really feel like my son would learn a lot more. I feel like there are more opportunities to be creative/foster creativity and more opportunities to make lessons come to life. Lisa mentioned the term cookie cutter, which is exactly how I would describe a public school education. There's just not much flexibility, definitely not the kind of flexibility and creativity that homeschooling affords.

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Jaime - posted on 01/27/2012

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Okay but your post didn't state anything about a working or non-working parent. You were saying that an average parent can't sufficiently home-school their child. I was just acknowledging that parents do have options for their kids to get help.

Ania - posted on 01/27/2012

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Jaime, I'm stating my opinion I'm not putting anyone down. It is just hard to me to imagine how a parent who has a full time job can work full time again at home on educating kids. Parents who stay home it is a different story I guess, but I still hold on to my opinion. Also Jamie not every homeschooling parent sends their kids to piano lessons or art lessons or any other activities, so you might be in minority.

Jaime - posted on 01/27/2012

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Ania there are programs to help homeschooled children if they are struggling with a certain subject or concept. It is not left only up to the parent. There are even homeschool programs attached to the public school, so that if there is a problem they can have a teacher come and help.



Most of our children ARE EXPOSED to more activities then a child going to school is. My son is in piano, gym, dance, art and a playgroup once a week with other homeschoolers. We also have fieldtrips with our school.



If you don't know anything about it stop putting us down.

Ania - posted on 01/27/2012

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I don't like the concept of homeschooling. I don't believe that average parent has education needed to effectively educate their children. On the other hand public schools...ugh there is a lot that is wrong with them. Still when you mentioned your daughter who completed 2 math books, that is great! Good girl, but your son did not, maybe a good teacher would be able to help him with methods that he/she learnt during years in college...There is also a social aspect of dealing with good and bad that groups has to offer. Kids should be exposed to everything

Stacey - posted on 01/27/2012

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In response to April, I work a full time job and homeschool my 2 children, ages 12 & 9. We use a Christian based curriculum, complete with dvd's and workbooks. It has worked well for our family. You certainly have to have dedication to homeschool and work. After reading some of the responses on here, it makes me chuckle. While one part of me chose to homeschool because of bullies and violence, though mild since they were in grade school, gets worse in the higher grades in our town. So yes protection was definitely part of it. Another part, as I am sure for most parents, would be for a quality education. I did not know how much public school in my town was lacking until we got into homeschooling this year. My children are learning things that they never would have learned had we not started homeschooling and for me the more they know the more well rounded they will be. I by no means shelter them, as we attend church and they go on outings with their church group. The older one has volunteered at a homeless shelter. He also has friends from around the globe online. It also makes it so much easier when they have questions, as I then have all of the information in front of me, to explain things in a way that makes it easy for them to understand. Half of the time in public school, if they could bring a text book home, it was only one sided, and that mate it difficult to offer any help. I will never send my kids back to public school. And yes my oldest son did graduate from public school, and had I known then what I know now, I would have fought with his dad to have him homeschooled. Happy homeschooling!

Merry - posted on 06/30/2011

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I was homeschooled and I turned out quite well :P
I learned how the world really is, but not when I was 6, yes I was sheltered but now as a young adult I'm not sheltered, sure my mom sheltered us as kids, but not so we would always be sheltered, she just thought we should be sheltered from the weirdos and crazy things in the world as we were growing up. When we were old enough to get jobs and go to college we experienced the 'real world' and our mom did a great job raising us so that when we were exposed to this real world we were able to learn and grow in our mentality and fit in quite nicely into society.
And yet we still don't drink, party, smoke, swear, sleep around, or do drugs.
We were sheltered from these things long enough that they seem stupid to do and we have no interest in experimenting in it all.
Idk, sheltering for childhood doesn't seem like it's done us any harm, in fact I think it's been a positive for me and my siblings.

Tara - posted on 06/29/2011

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@Mandian
My kids are homeschooled none of them has an illness that makes me want to do so.
Do some research on homeschooled adults, do some investigating into the larger world of homeschooling around the globed.
Read what some of these homeschooled adults have accomplished in their lives, read about famous homeschoolers who have contributed largely to the academic, philosophical and scientific fields.
Read and learn about homeschooling. It's not this one dimensional world.
My kids are all social, articulate, intelligent both academically and more importantly emotionally.
They are already productive and contributing members of our community.
Oh btw, they are almost 18, 15, 11, 8, 6 and 18 months.
All wonderful adjusted happy people doing good things in their lives and their community.

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Mandian, I'm glad you would be willing to send your child to a school with 60% drop out rate, but I'm not. And I'm glad you want them to experience a different culture, but for us it would have been a culture of drugs. We moved to avoid this, and our children will be attending public schools. But if we had not been able to move...it would have been private or homeschool. And I'm thankful that those choices were there for us.

Constance - posted on 06/29/2011

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@Mandian I do understand where you are coming from but until you have a child with disabilities that effect if they could live or die. Then you can't say that would be your decision in the end. My oldest is homeschooled because it is necessary but is in all A.P. Course and her year average is a 97% overall. My youngest will begin homeschool in the fall ecause she is with me more than she is in public school and all 16 of her doctors belive it is also best for her. I have 8 children and 2 stay home for school. Medical will trump everything always.

Jaime - posted on 06/29/2011

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Mandian - how is my son to have a good time at school if he is sick all the time? He does have social skills - he is the most social boy I know. Our home school group goes on field trips and he goes to a gym class once a week as well as piano group. My son is in no way sheltered or taken from the outside world. He has friends in the neighborhood he plays with all the time.

Mandian - posted on 06/29/2011

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I see that your intent is good, but I think that all children need to go to public school. It shows them how the world really is. It also teaches them social skills. They are able to see other cultures with their own eyes. I have known many people that were sheltered and ended up rebelling when they got the first chance. I will always have my kids in public school.

Jaime - posted on 06/29/2011

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Constance - Thank you for your post, after reading through all of these I feel very attacked for homeschooling my son > AND what they are saying is totally wrong!

Yes I will agree that there are the 10% of people who are abused and neglected with their homeschooling but that is not the case with most of us. My son is with an accredited private school who offers home school curriculum. He is learning the same exact things he would in public school. He is 7 years old and reading at a 4th grade level.

The reason I started homeschooling him last year is because he has severe asthma. He was out of school in kindergarten for more then 30 days...the principal was going to call the board on me because of his illness!!! Even though I had a doctors note every time and proof of either a hospital visit or doctors visit. I was NOT going to go through that again. And when Kiernan ended up in the hospital for almost a week after only being in 1st grade for 2 weeks...I pulled him out.

So any of you people who want to criticize and attack us maybe you should get your facts straight on WHY we do it. Yes it is to shelter and protect our children, but its from actual dangers that are at the schools - not because we are being selfish and wanting to keep them to ourselves.

Melissa - posted on 06/28/2011

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Sounds to me like you are not "hoarding precious gifts", you are controlling how they are interacted. Control is one of the best weapons in our parental arsenal and when used for the greater good our children will flourish.

I commend you for your strength...I attempted to homeschool and failed miserably. Congrats!

Patricia - posted on 06/26/2011

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That's exactly right! The main reason parents choose to "HomeSchool" their children is because of the problems with "BUSSING!" Our children live in the best neighborhoods and yet.....they get sent into the worst slummy neighborhood schools! So as a parent we have to make the choice....send them to schools in unsafe neighborhoods which means more trouble....or we can keep them home in their safe environment and "Teach our "OWN" Children in their safe home loving environment!!!!! :-)

Merry - posted on 06/19/2011

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My aunt does, but her kids were older when she went back to work. She works evenings and weekends though, and does school work in the daytime with her kids.
To be a teacher and homeschool might be tricky, but I'm sure it's possible. Your kids would just have to have a different schedule then the average school hours. You could do school in the evenings, and work through the summer and have months off in the winter when regular school hours are going on.
Idk if I'd do it, because your kids would have such different schedules then their peers, but it depends on how badly you want to both teach and homeschool.

April - posted on 06/19/2011

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does anyone have a full time job and also home schools their children? i need to get back to work within the next few years (i'm a teacher). IS it possible to work as a teacher and also homeschool my children???

Constance - posted on 06/18/2011

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Homeschoolers are defending their choice to teach their children at home. I think really what bothers everyone on both sides is stateing why or why no to teach at home or public.
But making a generalization that everyone does it because of having fear or don't want to educate so they keep them home.Or to say parents that send their kids to school don't want to be a parent is wrong. It isn't truelly the way 99% of all of us. That 1% gives everyone a bad label.
Makin a generalization is like saying: All Germans worship Hitler or all Muslims feel the same way as Bin Laden.
Everyone chooses what they feel is right even if we don't agree.

Merry - posted on 06/18/2011

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Anyone care to discuss un schooling :) I'm going to open a new thread for that!

Minnie - posted on 06/18/2011

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Laura, calling out a system and stating one's opinions on it is different than attacking a group of people. Dyan said that we homeschoolers have bought into media hype- that's making assumptions about us, that we don't do our research or know what is going on in our local school districts. I have not said that public schoolers are sheeple. I wouldn't ever assume that or assume that it is not working for you and yours. It's fine for a person to say that she believes that homeschool won't socialize a child enough or give adequate education but that's quite different from defining the people who do it.

Jaime - posted on 06/18/2011

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I homeschool my son because of his asthma. He went to public school for kindergarten and missed over 30 days from getting infections and pneumonia. Then when he ended up in the hospital for almost a week I told my husband that was it and pulled him from school. He hasn't been sick the entire year.

Isobel - posted on 06/18/2011

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and...only ONE person here has said anything negative about homeschooling in general

Isobel - posted on 06/18/2011

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You attack the public school system almost every other day...don't be silly.

Minnie - posted on 06/17/2011

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Dyan, I most certainly don't believe that public school will do any of the sort to your children. This entire debate is in defense of homeschooling. It is the homeschoolers who are having to defend their way of life. If we were on the attack of public school it would be a "is public school ok?" debate. Public school is not right for MY children. I am in no way saying it is wrong for others.

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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I agree on that. I guess we agree mostly I just don't want to see all my rights disappear as a homeschooler.

Isobel - posted on 06/17/2011

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If everybody homeschooled like the ladies in this forum, there would be no need for regulations.

That being said...not everybody is like you. And kids have the RIGHT to a decent shot at life. It is not anybody's choice to doom them to a life of working at McDonald's because they don't think their kid "needs" to learn advanced literature, maths or sciences.

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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I'm not a public school hater, I think some kids do exceptionally well there, some do average, some do poorly and some fail horribly.
I'm just more confident that I can teach my kids well, and so I don't want to wonder if they could be in the failing percentage of kids.
Honestly though I'm sure that if a parent is involved and cares about their kids education, no matter where they go to school I bet they can help their kid succeed.
I was homeschooled, I want to homeschool my kids. I don't think tis for everyone and I don't think anyone is wrong for not.

Rosie - posted on 06/17/2011

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lisa it's also insulting to insinuate that public schools will turn my kids into mindless remote memorizers, who know nothing and will retain nothing they have been "taught."
i also never claimed to not stereotype homeschoolers, lol. i know i do it just as much as i'm sure you do with public school.
i also said in my first post that there are some really horrible schools out there, and if that is the case where you live, then i don't blame you for wanting to homeschool. me on the other hand, i have great schools all around me, i see things differently than you do, that is all.

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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Well that's like unschooling, and while I'm not a fan, I think those parents are trying to teach their kids, just not with set curriculums and regular school hours and tests etc.
They might be handicapped in corporate America, but some kids go through 12 years of public school and are also handicapped educationally.

Minnie - posted on 06/17/2011

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I wonder where the line is drawn. I really don't think that parental rights trump child rights. I think the greyish area here is that we have different perceptions on which is a healthy and safe way to raise a child. I mean, thinking of other subjects, I've been told that I should be turned into the authorities for breastfeeding my two year old (and for however long she wants to)- those people think that I'm putting her in danger. And I DO agree that compromising a child's education is putting that child in danger as well. I know too many religious homeschoolers who keep their daughers in a box, metaphorically, so that they can't go to college and be more than a wife and mom.

So what are acceptable regulations for homeschool? Is a yearly evaluation by a public school teacher acceptable? A review of a year's worth of work and the subjects learned? Standardized tests taken? I know that in my state if the child isn't at state standards upon evaluation one more year is given to improve the lack in education and then the child is forced to go to public school if the situation does not improve.

Isobel - posted on 06/17/2011

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You don't consider not being taught anything is "in danger"? Even though you'll be handicapping them for their entire life?

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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I think it's a balance. Yes parental rights are more important then child's rights as long as the child isn't in danger of anything. We have the right to create them, and so we can raise them how we see fit as long as the child isn't getting hurt.
So yeah. Sort of.

Isobel - posted on 06/17/2011

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SEEMS an obvious necessity...and yet....here we are.

and does that answer mean "yes, I believe I have more rights in regards to my child's education than my child does"?

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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I don't think you should have to have a college degree,but graduating highs school seems like an obvious necessity!
Idk, I wouldn't have an issue with a basic literary test or something, but my point is that when the government starts stepping inside our homes and regulating how we raise our kids, it's a slippery slope that I don't want to know where it could end up.
I disagree with how some parents raise their kids in general, from nutrition choices, to lack of discipline, to horrible morals and standards, etc.
But no one is checking up to make sure I'm not killing my kids on a diet of hohos and mc donalds. No one checks to see if I'm teaching him with racism or sexism.
It's a small piece of the picture how a kid does school and there's plenty of ways to parent badly in public school as well.
Idk,aren't there kids graduating high school illiterate? I think the waiting for superman documentary went over how badly public schools a failing in some areas, seems they should work on fixing the government schools first before intruding into private schools like homeschoolers.
What are the laws like to teach in a private school? I think you don't need a degree.....

Tara - posted on 06/17/2011

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@Laura H and Laura G. :)
Hoffman, Laura is not and has never asked for parental regulation or suggest that the government would step in and say you are an unfit *parent* what she has suggested is perhaps more regulation regarding registering with the school board, testing for children, basic testing for parents with regards to maths and English. and other guidelines in place to ensure that homeschooled children are not missing out on a well rounded and full educational experience.
I do think it is very important that homeschooling parents be able to pass a literacy test, it is unfair to your child to be taught punctuation if you do not understand it yourself or how it is used in life, to simply not teach sentence structure because you don't know or like grammar is unfair.
So I see where you're going with this Laura G. I support some guidelines but I fear that people will become polarized and see it as an infringement on their rights, mostly the right wing Christian hs'ing crowd. They will just move further into the background.
I would happily take a test for literacy and competence but I wouldn't go so far as to say I should be a certified teacher. That just makes no sense since a lot of teaching school is not memorizing content, it is dealing with children in a group setting. They are not taught what to teach but how to teach it. I know my kids better than any teacher, if I know what it is they need to learn, I can teach it my way, ensuring that they learn it, properly on a core level.
Anyhow, Laura, once again you've swung me over to your side, I do think there should be some regulations in place to ensure children are being taught not just by loving parents but by competent ones.
There is a homeschooler or ex homeschooler on this site who has atrocious spelling and grammar, and it's not a case of internet slang etc. she adds the tell tale (sp?) after simple words that my 11 could spell.

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I agree 100% Tara.I have to say maybe i am kinda ignorant as i don't know a lot about homeschooling to be honest.I do know parents know there children so well.If they feel public or homeschooling is best.Who are we to say different.

I think its great you have the choice and you have picked the best choice for your children.I wish you all the very best.Its not a choice for us.



I think maybe a little more research about homeschooling would be wise for me to do.lol

Isobel - posted on 06/17/2011

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so you believe that parents have more rights than children when it comes to children's education? You have the right to never teach them math even though that means they will never be able to function within the real world when they become adults?

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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Laura I think it boils down to the fact that you don't have to prove anything to become a parent. You only have to not injure your kid and anything else goes.
So some parents parent their kids differently then others, like say spanking families might think parents who don't spank are raising wild children with o discipline. Or Christian parents might think atheist parents are raising little heathens with no morals. Or farmer parents raising girls to be housewives think parents who want their girls to go to college are ruining the gender roles.
Or parents who let their kids learn through life (unschoolers) think that parents who send their kids to school are stifling their creativity and ruining their spirit.
Idk, I think that homeschooled or not people can be bad parents. But unless there's actual abuse happening it's not the governments place to step in and say they aren't fit parents.
So while you and I might agree that kids deserve all the opportunities educationally, some parents don't think exactly the same. And we can't be telling parents how to raise their kids.

Isobel - posted on 06/17/2011

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:( That's too bad. We actually are struggling, in my city, with what they are calling "private schools within the public system". People who live in good neighbourhoods are able to raise so much money for extras that they are essentially providing their kids with a privatish type education within the public school system while the poorer neighbourhoods go without.

I know it's a struggle here to balance raising money for your own school while donating enough of it to other less-fortunate schools as well.

Sherri - posted on 06/17/2011

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In certain places sure Laura I won't deny it, heck you hear of pregnant teens. However, in many places it also is not occurring.
Only 13% of teens in U.S. are having sex by 15. Most are waiting till late teens. The avg. age most begin to have sex is 17. The statistics are drastically dropping.
http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/FB-ATSRH....

Minnie - posted on 06/17/2011

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No, not in our district. Our district is really really horrible. I'm not exaggerating.

Isobel - posted on 06/17/2011

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Lisa, do they get lots of outside time that is unstructured? cause I know that while my kids only have "gym" twice a week, they also have swimming once a week, two 15 minute recesses, and an hour for lunch...and if you had ever seen the school yard during these breaks you would see that there is PLENTY of physical activity happening during those times.

Our school system also has a dance program that comes in once a week to help all the children come together to create one large dance that they do all together which brings us up to 4 structured physical activities per week plus at least an hour outside every day.

Minnie - posted on 06/17/2011

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Dyan, the schools in our district offer gym once a week for elementary students. It's not a preconceived notion. I care about my children's education and activities and have had extensive conversations and tours of her school (if she were to go to public). It's no lie. You say you don't stereotype but you're acting as if we just pander to the media and hype. Good grief. Do you really think we don't do any research, don't have a clue as to what is going on in our local school districts? It's insulting.



Yet, with homeschooling, my girls can be active while learning during the day, rather than waiting until they get home (and then having to deal with homework).

Isobel - posted on 06/17/2011

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Tara: Don't shoot the messenger. If you don't like the fact that people are using the guise of "homeschooling" to abuse their children join me in arguing FOR tighter regulations.

I notice though, how you ignored the rest of my posts...physical abuse is only ONE of my many worries about unregulated homeschooling.

What about kids who are being taught English by people who can't spell and don't think it's important to learn how to? What about kids who are being "tested" while their parent sits beside them and helps them with all the answers? What about kids whose parents feel that children don't need to be exposed to higher maths cause they are "unnecessary"? What about kids who are just snuggling on the couch with their parents watching movies all day or going to the park?

I'm not saying that all homeschooling is bad...obviously the way you teach your children is wonderful and IF I could do it I would, but that doesn't mean that ALL homeschoolers are like you.

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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The sexual activity in middle school was a national statistic I saw on tv. It didn't say intercourse, it said sexual experience.

Sherri - posted on 06/17/2011

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Although I don't care if you decide to homeschool or not. I have to agree with Dyan in the fact that there is no sex going on in middle school in all actuality most of our high schoolers aren't even having sex. Also I don't rely on school to give my kids exercise anyways they get plenty of that at home.

Plus our kids are all taught to there learning styles if they are advanced the curriculum is tailored to them, for those that can't grasp certain things they offer special classes and before or after school help for those children and will alter the way tests or quizzes are given for a child that may learn in a different way(and yes I know this first hand because it was done for my middle child) The kids are taught 2 foreign languages by the time they are in 5th grade Spanish and French.

I will not knock the benefits in learning for a homeschooled kids but homeschoolers should also not for parents who opt for a more traditional setting.

Rosie - posted on 06/17/2011

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where the hell are you people going to school that MOST kids are having sex in middle school, and gym is only offered once a week, and different learning styles aren't worked with? i feel bad for you that you have to fear your public schooling. i feel maybe some of you have some preconceived notion about public school from media, and other women like yourselves who havn't sent their kids to public school at all to even know what it's like.

Tara - posted on 06/17/2011

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For those who would like to know more about the benefits of homeschooling and real statistics on homeschoolers vs public school regarding everything from academics to emotional intelligence, socialization, college and university results, jobs and careers etc. etc.

http://www.hslda.org/research/faq.asp

Very good info and pretty much sums up what we've all been saying about public education and homeschooling.
The stats dispel some common myths about socialization and academic successes.

http://www.hslda.org/research/faq.asp

Minnie - posted on 06/17/2011

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Yes- so much less time is required to teach just a couple of children whose personalities and learning styles you know vs. a whole gaggle of students with different learning styles and personalities. It annoys me the amount of time the girls would devote to public school, including the time to get there and back. Gym is only offered once a week- and they need waaay more activity than that. Then they'll come home and have just a few short hours before bed, during which they'll have to do homework.

Merry - posted on 06/17/2011

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My aunt works close to full time and she is homeschooling her three sons as well. She works 3-8 pm shifts 4 weekday evenings, and one 12 hour shift on a weekend.
I remember as a kid being homeschooled iwas able to set my days up however I wanted, and some days I'd wake up at 6am and get going with school and be able to be completely done by noon! Then I'd have the rest of the day to play or go to the park etc. Other days I was tired so I'd sleep til 9 and end up doing school til dinner time, but it was so wonderful to be able to have a flexible schedule, if I was sick I could skip a day and make it up the next day. If we wanted to go apple picking or to the beach or something we would work ahead for a few days so we could have off for the field trip.
We also always had three weeks off for Christmas, we loved it it was so restful to get a big chunk of vacation. We always ended school mid may because we never had teacher holidays, parent teacher days, we skipped spring break, we worked on little holidays. Really the only time off we had was the 3 weeks for Christmas, and three days for thanksgiving......so our school year was quite short but we did all the work public schools did, just in shorter time!

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