Self-esteem

Amy - posted on 03/22/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

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First off, self-respect and self-esteem are not the same things. Don't get those confused.


Is self-esteem over-rated? Self-esteem and self-respect often get confused with each other. You can respect yourself without thinking you are top dog and deserve it all. Self-esteem often gets into that area where you think you are entitled to everything, become arrogant, prideful, and think the rules don't apply to you. Since the...what, 60s?... people stress about making sure your children have good self-esteem. But, did we mix it up? Shouldn't it be self-respect instead?

Instead of thinking of "me, me, me" shouldn't they be thinking of their actions and how it affects all the people around them? Good manners, even affect those around them. It's certainly not self-serving to be polite. It's self-serving to steal.

"Common sense says that the higher one's self-esteem, the lower one's regard for the rights of others, including in extreme instances, others' very right to life." On the other hand there are those who respect themselves, but are humble and don't put themselves on a pedestal. "Mahatma Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Jesus....people who had little regard for self-interest but put others first - even when others tried to put THEM on pedestals, they refused to get on a high horse about it and remained humble."


Interesting concept to think about. Was reading today- the quotes are from "parenting by the book" by john rosemond.

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Jenni - posted on 03/22/2011

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That's why they call the last 20 years the "Me First" generation. It's actually quite a scary notion. When a generation lacks empathy and sympathy and goals are to satisfy only yourself. It takes the humanity of the human race and contributes to the downfall of civilization.

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Alexis - posted on 03/22/2011

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I do agree with you, and that all of us today need more self-respect, however I also know many who need some higher self esteem as well. The idea is that our children feel that they are not worthy of any opportunities that come their way, for example they want to be a teacher but don't have the self esteem to feel that they deserve it and therefore they never work towards it. However if self respect was higher I am sure a healthy level of self esteem would follow. I do see that currently self esteem is very high and self respect is very low, causing a lot of the current issues. There needs to be a balance within all of us.

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