Sex Addiction

Isobel - posted on 02/19/2010

oh...and yes...I was super relieved when I found out about all of his extra curricular activities to get my clean bill of health...phew!

Isobel - posted on 02/19/2010

I do believe it's real, caused by unhealthy associations in your mind to the chemicals that your brain produces during and after sex, same as gambling and shopping...but I do see how the chemicals in your brain cause a physical dependence.

The only reason that we get physically addicted to coke and heroine, etc. are physically addictive is because they outdo the feelgood endorphins that our brain produces...then our brain stops producing them (cause the substitute is better)...as I understand it anyway.

My ex (as I found out after our divorce) fucked anybody and anything that passed close enough. Some of them, he was really embarrassed and ashamed of...but I believe he wasn't honestly able to say no.

He did have the self-esteem issues though too...I'm sure that was part of it.

Erin - posted on 02/19/2010

I tend to think it's more of an obsession or compulsion, rather than an actual addiction. Addiction to me implies a physical factor. I think sex is in the same league as gambling or exercise. There's a psychological issue driving the habit, but I don't see it as an addiction. And I definitely think the word 'addiction' gets thrown around as a way of copping out and denying responsibility, as in the case of Tiger Woods. Sex addict my fat ass!

Esther - posted on 02/19/2010

You're not an addict, you're an attention seeeking dumbass.

(not directed at anyone - you is in general terms)

Jocelyn - posted on 02/19/2010

I think that it CAN be an addiction, but I also think that people do try and use it as an excuse for lack of control. Anything can become addictive under the right circumstance (I'm thinking that a sex addiction probably is probably (based) the same as an exercise addiction, the whole adrenaline, blood pumping, endorphins etc). It seems to me that it would probably be more of a mental addiction, as opposed to a physical (would withdraw from sex cause physical side effects?). I've been addicted to smoking (a couple times) and each time I've quit it has been a different outcome; once it was a physical withdraw (shakes etc), once it was a mental habit I was trying to break (it was the habit, the motion of actually smoking that I liked), once it was a combination of both. When I stopped cocaine, it was way more a physical addiction than mental (but that was a factor, don't get me wrong). I had coke bugs, I would shake, puke, fidget, get hot flashes, things like that. But getting over a physical addiction (in my experience) was easier (in the long run) than getting past a mental addiction. It just depends on the person; if you have an addictive personality then it is sooo easy for something to switch from a bad habit/obsession to an actual addiction.

?? - posted on 02/19/2010

I don't think SEX is something that someone can be 'addicted too' I think it's the thrill that they are addicted too. I think it's the adrenaline, the release, the raw energy - I think that if it weren't sex, it'd be speed, if it weren't speed, it'd be robbing banks -- you get what I'm saying?



I think sex is easier than those other things though. Speed is illegal, robbing banks is illegal. Most people who are actually diagnosed as a 'sex addict' are also 'addicted' to exercise.



If Tiger Woods really was addicted to sex... I don't think he'd really be all that sorry about what he did - he would probably give a thousand excuses, saying it was his wifes fault cause she wouldn't put out. I think in Tiger's case, he's an egotistical jerk that has security issues.



I know a few people who call themselves sex addicts and see a councelor for it, they're all low low low on the self-esteem levels. They have no confidence, they are depressed and feeling unworthy of real love - they are excessive partiers, they are constantly flirting with EVERYONE and then when you tell them to fuck off they turn into a sobbing pile of excuses about their life being so horrible and no one loving them.



I think Tiger's ego got the best of him.







I'm sure there are legitimate cases of being 'addicted to sex' and I'm sure there are people who just like to have the attention of the stigma of being addicted to something when really they just like having sex.



Being an 'addict' and the whole 'poor me' 'pity me' 'save me' mentality is on the rise these days with all the different syndroms and disorders and diseases that aren't really diseases but mean you get to go and 'learn how to function' in a big cushy rehab facility... it's really boring to me, being an ACTUAL recovering addict... all of the bullshit people 'claim' to be 'addicted' too when all they really need is to smarten the fuck up and stop making bad decisions. You're not an addict, you're an attention seeeking dumbass.



(not directed at anyone - you is in general terms)

Amie - posted on 02/19/2010

I think for some it can be real. Even though it's not really officially recognized by health organizations (at least that I've heard of so far). WHO does have a diagnosis for excessive sexual drive but not sex addiction. It is being campaigned for to be included by psychiatrists but with guidelines. There are others who say some proposed guidelines are too vague.



I'm kind of the same mind as alcohol, drug, etc. being a disease as I am with this one though. With everything I've read about it (and heard from one ex-friend who describes himself as a "sex addict" [can you guess why we're not friends anymore? LOL]) it always seems to do with an underlying condition that needs to be corrected or worked on.

Sara - posted on 02/19/2010

I do think sex addiction is real, but I think it's the result of deeper problems with grief, self-esteem, addiction to drugs or alcohol, depression, etc. I think it's a way of dealing with things, just like other addictions are. That's why I'm not so quick to dismiss it as a lack of self-control. I think there are probably people that abuse the idea of it to get away with things (my jury is still out on old Tiger), but I do think it is legitimate and something that people struggle with.

Sarah - posted on 02/19/2010

Hmmmm not sure really. I guess there's a difference between a physical addiction and an emotion based addiction.

You can get ''addicted'' to anything i guess. I'd be more inclined to call it a REALLY bad habit that you're struggling to break! :)

Sarah - posted on 02/19/2010

Hmmmm not sure really. I guess there's a difference between a physical addiction and an emotion based addiction.

You can get ''addicted'' to anything i guess. I'd be more inclined to call it a REALLY bad habit that you're struggling to break! :)