overwhelmed, taken for granted, help?

Erin - posted on 07/04/2012

It sounds like you already know what you want to do. Please talk to him, express your feelings and hurt and if things don't change it's time to act and do something for you. God bless!

Sarah - posted on 05/09/2012

Hello, he sounds like an absolute idiot if I'm going to be completely honest, now (not to make a generalisation) but most men are pretty shocking at housework and the incentive to do it without being told to but that's no excuse, you have 2 small children in the house and its hard work!! You are supposed to be a team!
I'm in a very similar situation, I have a nearly 3 year old daughter and 5mnth old son and iv just gone back to work full time, we can't afford child are so we work shifts around each other, my husband works a week of days (7am-3pm) followed by a week of nights (11pm-7am) and I expect him to help as much as possible, he isn't always happy about it and he doesn't always do it but I will let him know if I think he's out of order, I work 30-40hrs a week evenings and weekends and have mY children all day, I'm exhausted as I also do most of the housework but I know he does his best most of the time, he just doesn't have the same 'get up and go' that I have! So to sum up yes he should be helping you, he might not want to clean up other peoples mess but then perhaps he shouldn't of had children, I would write down what you want to say and sit down have a proper heart to heart and explain he's not supporting you and the children like he should!!
The cheating thing is a roughy, I can't really comment because I think it all depends on the person or couple, my friend is very black and white and would leave her husband if he ever cheated on her but I'm abit more in the grey area and believe mistakes are made and that's no excuse but if you truly love each other you can work through these things providing it doesn't happen again,
'cheat on me once shame on you, cheat on me twice shame on me!!'
I really hope this works out for you Hun, and without sounding patronising you have definitely not been together "forever" as at 19 you will hopefully have another 60-70years left if you left him today and only lived to 50 you've only wasted 8-9% of your life on him which isn't a massive amount xxx (only 4% if you make it to 100yrs old) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Christina - posted on 05/02/2012

I have a 5 month old and I am a stay at home mom. If my husband EVER cheated on me, I'd take his son and we would move in with a friend or relative. No one should ever cheat on their 7 1/2 month pregnant wife!! EVER!! My husband and I stopped having sex when I was about 6 months pregnant because my belly got in the way and he was creeped out. I didn't understand why, but I respected his decision. If he ever went out and had sex with someone else during that time I would have divorced him so fast. You definitely need to talk to him and let him know that this is unacceptable and that you are the mother of his two children. NO woman should have to have that heartbreak of being cheated on. I understand if you want to make it work but communication is the key to everything. Your fiance needs a reality check. You need to know that you are a wonderful mother and fiance for making things work and for doing all you do. God bless you and I hope everything works out!

Rachel - posted on 04/11/2012

Hun yes you have had a pretty hard life and i think that it is not good for your boys for you to be stressed all the time. It is not fair for you to be doing all of the cleaning he can help clean instead of playing video games and he needs to stop waisting money your boys need to come first and you need to make sure that they are always take care of. As far as the cheating you should have left him then because if he did it once it is easy for him to do it again. he didnt even have the balls to tell you him self that he made a mistake. or if it was just a one time thing or on going. If your mom says you can move back in there i would pack your boys up and atleast tell him he needs to get his act together for you to come back home. he needs to clean up after himself and help with the boys. I work over nights and also help clean and take care of my kids when my boyfriend is working. that is the way a relationship works it needs to be 50/50 not 70/30 that doesnt work. it also sounds like he is putting the games and stuff ahead of you and the boys. I would not put up with that.