Am I crazy!??

Kristian - posted on 06/29/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Ok ladies, maybe this is TMI but need to vent and maybe I will feel a little better.
Due August 2nd with our first child. Before pregnancy sex was all the time (few time a day!) even up until about a month ago sex was pretty regular. Slowly over time though his sex drive has completely dropped. However mine is thru the roof!! Now even if we had dropped to once a day it was ok and everyother day wasnt happy about it but was still ok. Well girls now its been a week! This doesnt sit well with me. I know that I am rapidly approaching my due date but I still want the attentoin he used to give me I attempted to start something with him a couple days ago and hes like I just dont feel right with the baby and all. I was so angry and upset because it had been a minute, and I told him the baby has been there all this time so whats going on now. He just said he didnt feel right. I know he is probably scared of hurting the baby but i have told him on many occasions that this is not going to hurt the baby . The dr said sex is ok so what is his problem. I know i could be having issues so much worse but to me its just that serious. I even tryed again this morning before we were leaving for work. he was NOT having it. So of course I felt slightly rejected. Any one else going through this?? I mean really ladies ive gained 19lbs so far so i already and im like wow im big! (well bigger than i usually am ya know) and then when he refuses to touch me other than to rub my belly kinda makes me feel well i guess rejected. Am I crazy??

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Christina - posted on 07/05/2010

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Men handle pregnancy so different than women. To him, your whole body is changing and no matter what he does he will never fully understand what you are going through.
Seeing your body changing like this can affect a mans sex drive so greatly, in either direction. It has nothing to do with you personally, it is more with him. Here are a few tips that I have:
1) Try your hardest not to get mad at him. Anger and resentment can worsen an already low sex drive. Instead just talk to him about it, and explain that you aren't mad at him, you just wanted to get some lovin' since your hormones are raging!
2) Talk to him about possibly using sex toys. He either can use them on you, or let you go at it alone. This way, you get what you want, he doesn't feel bad for not feelin it and everyone is happy.If he uses them on you then he may feel like he is still a part of it, and sometimes this raises their sex drive!
3) Just be ok with everything and don't take anything personally. He is probably having a hard time seeing your body in this light, and doesn't know how to react. Just let his thoughts and emotions run their course, just as you expect him to let you.
I really hope this helps out!

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Terri - posted on 07/08/2010

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... think yourself lucky you've managed to have it at all...
my sexdrive dissapeard until around 6months, then it was through the roof, we managed to have sex once, since then i have been in and out of hospital with contractions and have actually been told, by the doctor, that sex is a no no because baby might make an apperance... i'm now 7.5months and i've had sex once in the whole time!
then you have to wait 6weeks until after the birth (because of infection) so if baby comes on his due date i won't have had sex for 4/5months!!!!
i'm hoping he comes out soon! lol x

Sarah - posted on 07/02/2010

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Hi Kristian,
Try not to take it to heart. My husband and i are the other way round. He keeps asking me when i'm going to start the period where pregnant woman always wants some lol. I'm just not interested.
Anyway, i know it must be so frustrating but i really wouldn't try to force the issue. He is probably seeing you in a different light right now (as a beautiful pregnant woman rather than a sex object). You don't have a long way to go now hun so just do what you need to do without forcing him to get involved. I'm sure it can be quite daunting for a guy to share a bed with a pregnant woman so just try not to push him away.
Keep your chin up hun xx

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