Bullying

Erica - posted on 04/14/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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In the past couple of months my son has started to become a bit of a bully it seems. When he is in the quiet room at church he will hit people, and he pushes his older cousin around (cousin is 18 months). My son is almost 15 months and last night we were out and he tried pulling a little boys hair and pushed his 5 year old cousin out of the way. Everytime he does something like that I say that's naughty and I remove him from that situation. However, it doesn't seem to be getting better and I don't know what to do because he is too young to get the concept of timeouts (we do them anyway). And not that I'm defeding his behavior but he does play with my parents dog's kind of rough so I'm wondering if he is not differentiating between kids and dogs at this age. PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!

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Louise - posted on 04/14/2011

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Just keep reinforcing the gentle side of things he will get the message eventually. Just make sure he understands the word gentle and then you can use it when he is with other children. Keep doing what you are doing this rough stage does not last long.

Erica - posted on 04/14/2011

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We do that with him, however, my parents dog's like to play rough so I think my son has learned that its okay to play this rough with everyone. He does pet the dogs nicely (most of the time!)

Louise - posted on 04/14/2011

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I would start with the treatment of the dog! you have to teach him to be gentle with every living thing not just humans. Sit with him and hold his hand and place it on the dog and stroke him gently. Say you are being gentle whilst doing it. tell him how much the dog likes this. Show him the dogs waggy tail and say look the dogs likes you being gentle doesn't he. When he lashes out at the dog stop him and say look the dog does not like that you have made him sad. lets make the dog happy again and gently stroke the dog. He has to learn that hitting the dog causes the dog pain and is not nice and the only way to teach this is to promote gentle touching and love. make sure he gets a cuddle every night and you praise him for being loving and kind. Tell him how nice that is that he gives you a cuddle. Use phrases like "good cuddling" "good boy for being gentle" When you place him with the other children use the phrase "be gentle" he should understand that he should not lash out. He is still very young so don't be to hard on him but he does need to know that hitting pulling hair and such hurts people and that he should not do it. Good luck!

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