How do you get your child to go to sleep??

Ophelia - posted on 09/06/2010

The best thing I did was follow a books advice about not making a routine to putting my child to bed. We never rocked her or anything we put her in her crib and let her fall asleep with out a huge production. You miss out on the rocking and bonding but we put her in her crib at bed time and she rubs her head and goes to sleep, I suggest tapering off anything slowly and letting your baby learn how to put themselves to sleep. I replaced her night time bottle with water and she sucks on it for the security. The book I used is called better sleeping solutions I highly recommend

Tia - posted on 08/31/2010

all of us are different, i use it because it works for me, if co-sleeping works for you, then great :) also, i started when he was a few months old, so far the only person he's attached to is me, mainly because i leave for school after a whole year and he never seen me gone. but he has no other attachments

Noreen - posted on 08/30/2010

I think the cry it method is awful. I am an ap/nl parent and believe that the cry-it-out method causes children to have trust issues and they end up having some kind of anxiety when they get older or become attached to an unnatural object like a paci or stuffed bear.

With that said, I co-sleep and breastfeed my daughter to sleep every night. I did the same with my older sons and they are now 6 and 4 and extremely independent confident little boys. They sleep great in their own beds in their own room. But they are always welcomed in our bed. :)

Tia - posted on 08/28/2010

i use a cry it out method.. it works. then i check on him every once in a while

Tracy - posted on 08/28/2010

i learned from my mistakes.. my first who is now 10 was a major pain to settle for bed.i breast fed him for 13 months and a lot of the time i was so tired i would just lay with him while he fed and sleep aswell. almost until my second was born did he expect me to sleep with him. we did have a lot of issues in the first 4 years of his life due to his father and i separating and other personal things. i'm sure that had a lot to do with his habits. it was a comfort for us both i guess. however when he started school i did make an effort to reduce the occurance he would still ask but i would always make some excuse and or tell him no outright. i would always tuck him in and read a short story though to avoid any tantrams. with my 11 month old i only breast fed for the first 6 months as returning to work was too complicated to continue. he has slept in his cot since he was 6 weeks old. as soon as he was fed i would lay him in his cot. for the first few weeks i would lay in my bed listening intently for the slightest gurgle and would jump at every little sound after awhile i realised he was used to the idea and would wake quite frequently. at about 3 months i would leave him for longer periods. however he was a little fiddly for day time naps a pacifier sorted that. by 4 months he would easily go down during the day. and sleep about 7 hours at night without waking. now he sleeps from about 6.30-7pm until 6-630am without to much trouble. he has his dinner about 5.30 and a bottle at bed time and is sound asleep within 5 minutes of tucking him in. this routine works for us as we have early mornings and rather than a lot of frustration trying to get dinner for us he is happily tucked into bed when we try to eat. over the next few months i plan to stretch the times a little so we can start to include him in our meal times as well. the longer it is left the harder it becomes in my experience. be strong and stick to a routine.

Lisa - posted on 08/27/2010

AT my 9 month appt. my doctor told me that I should try to not BF her asleep because she had a lot of teeth and she wanted me to brush her teeth or at least drink some water before going to bed. I thought it would be difficult, but it wasn't. At around 7:30 I BF her for a bit, then my husband and I go into the bathroom to brush her teeth while singing a little song, then my husband reads a book to her and we're off to bed with some nature sounds in the background by around 8. She's usually completely awake, but usually knocks out on her own without a peep around 8:15-8:30. I think starting the brushing teeth before we go to bed is going to be a good idea because she'll be used to doing it and it's good to build healthy habits like that. Maybe something like that could work for you too. Good luck!

Karen - posted on 08/27/2010

my son has been sleeping 7 to 7 since 3 months old and is currently 11 months old. its all about routine and structure an
most important they must learn to soothe themselves. It will take time w/ your daughter because she has relied on you
rocking her to sleep. About 30 minutes prior to bedtime we
slow activities down. When it is time for bedtime we bring
him into the room and read him abedtime story. We then use the same language everynight and even before naps so it it is
a sleep cue. We say Shh , Shh go to sleep and I love you. You can find what works for you. We also used the ferber method at the beginning, letting him cry it out. This is what
they often need to do until they finally learn to soothe
themselves. It took less then aweek of crying it out and then
from that day forward he has gone to bed w/ ease.
good Luck!

Karen - posted on 08/26/2010

I have 11 month old twins and they could not be more opposite. One goes into the crib awake and plays for a few minutes, then lies down and goes right to sleep. The other I have been rocking, but now it is getting to be a bit much and we are having the same issue. the last few nights we have been rocking him for a bit to get him sleepy then put him in the crib. But he pops right up and stands there crying and crying. I guess I should just le thim cry himself to sleep, but it is really hard!! I know its time, but it is not going well. Last night he was up until 10 :15!

Hanna - posted on 08/25/2010

Kaylen is 11 months. Around 8 she has her milk in a sippy cup, then around 9 we usually give her a bath. Then put her in her crib. We have been working on not patting her back anymore, and having her go to sleep on her own. She doesn't use a pacifier anymore. If she tries to get up and i just lay her down again and say "nite nite". Sometimes it takes awhile, other times shes right out.

Melissa - posted on 08/25/2010

We have tried getting our son to a set bed time, but it tends to vary usually 8-9 at night. We play around a bit, nurse and cuddle in our bed (usually mommy and daddy go to bed at the same time), then we bring him into his crib. At this point we have to make sure he is asleep before we put him in bed because he has figured how to crawl out of his crib, but he falls down once he gets over the rail.
Good Luck!

Amanda - posted on 08/25/2010

my little girl who 11 months to as just gone in to an cot sshe would not setlle had to put her moset basket in her cot for an week the took it out. them had to do pick up put down with her it took 2 weeks them she ened up settleing. tery putting her in her own room that may help

Emily - posted on 08/25/2010

My son will be one in a week. We started him at 4 months sleeping to a cd. Actually he slept to the sound of the vaccum since he was a baby, He was a little colicky and it was the only thing that calmed him down. But now that he is older he will sleep to any kind of music. At first we started rocking him with the cd playing and then just layed him in his crib and turned on the music, Since 6 months he goes right to sleep like this, Rarely cries,,if he does it's only for a few minutes and he is out. He won't even let me rock him to sleep. He lays down and falls asleep on his own. Also around 9 months we went through a couple weeks of seperation anxiety where he cried when we left the room but the pediatrician recommended letting him cry it out so he would learn to soothe himself so we did that a couple nights and he went right back to normal, falling asleep on his own. Hope this helps.

Kari-Anne - posted on 08/25/2010

I have twins, two boys. I've used the same routine with all my kids. We do the same things every night, at the same time... The twins used to fall asleep in my arms, but at the age of 8 moths we started to break that routine. Now we just get them to bed, kiss them good night, and they'll fall asleep. They cried at first, but after 3-4 nights they just went to sleep. We just kissed their forhead, told them that now you're gonna sleep, and went out of the room. As long as they feel safe, knowing that mummy or daddy still is around, then the baby will fall into sleep.... Good luck!!

Sarah - posted on 08/23/2010

I always said I would never use the CIO method (cry it out.) but since i have been back to work, he will only sleep in the swing for my sister, and he is a big boy. so over the weekend I tried just laying him in bed after his nightly routine of bath, singing and nursing. as i'm closing the door, i say night night, love you. and blow a kiss. He wines for like not even a minute, and he is quite and falls asleep on his own. by the end of this week, i am hoping that he will go down without wining at all. It worked today for my sister too at nap time. so I am keeping my fingers crossed that he will be fine with this all the time. good luck with finding what works.

Leah - posted on 08/23/2010

My son is 11 months and has been sleeping through the night for about a month and a half. We used the long goodbye method described in Kim West's book, "The Sleep Lady's Good Night Sleep Tight". It involves comforting the baby in the crib, but moving further and further away from the crib for about two weeks until you can lay the baby down and leave the room. It is amazing when something works and the baby is finally sleeping through the night and going to sleep on his own. Good luck!

Amy - posted on 08/22/2010

I have one of those ocean wonders in my crib and it is amazing! before i got it, she wouldnt sleep in her crib at all, she always wanted to sleep on me and now that i have this, i can literally sit her in her crib, wide awake with her soother and turn that thing on and i never hear from her again. if you dont have anything for them in the crib to distract them from being alone, that could be part of the issue!

Heather - posted on 08/21/2010

My son has a bath, cup of formula, and then lays on the couch beside us and goes to sleep. SOMETIMES he'll sit up and lean on me and go to sleep that way. Then we take him to bed and he sleeps in HIS bed for 10 hours usually. He's been doing this since about 4 months. Prior to that we would let him ALMOST fall asleep on the couch and then put him in bed to fall asleep there. That worked also...I just wanted to see him longer so we started the other routine. :)

Deborah - posted on 08/21/2010

My son gets a bath right before bed, then a bed time story, then I recline him across my lap under his baby blanket and sing All Through The Night until he either goes to sleep, or settles enough that he doesn't scream his head off when I put him in his crib.

Lon - posted on 08/21/2010

Ever since Nicholas was 6 months old we had a routine of a quick book, turn lights to low, turn TV volume down (hubby watching TV) change into night-time diaper, oatmeal with cinnamon and then I would give him his bottle on the couch. He would usually fall asleep by the end of the bottle or within 5 mins. I would hold him about 10 mins then put him down in his pack n play. Around 8 months when he finally really started sleeping all through the night we moved him into his crib. He sleeps from about 9pm to 9am. About 2 weeks ago he wasn't falling asleep with me on the couch anymore and I decided he is big enough to go to sleep by himself. He needed to learn how to do that so that he can self sooth himself. The first 3 nights I put him in his crib awake after his bottle he cried for about 5-7 minutes and then off to sleep. It was hard to hear him cry but he did fine. Then a few days of crying til I got to the bottom of the stairs and off to sleep! Tonight he didn't cry at all.

Sherry - posted on 08/20/2010

We don't play with Kenny from about an hour before bedtime, as we want him to have some "wind down time". I used to read to him until he fell asleep but he doesn't want that any more. He just wants his binky and for one of us to rock him to sleep. He's asleep within a few minutes. We try to keep him on a sleeping schedule because he sleeps better and doesn't get cranky when he's on a schedule.

Katie - posted on 08/20/2010

I started putting my son in his crib awake at about 7 months. At first I would put him down and he would cry. I would let him cry for about 10 minutes and then go in and rub his head and sing to him until he fell asleep, but never picked him up out of the crib. This only went on for abut 2 weeks. Now I put him down in his crib, sing him a few songs before I leave the room ( he loves music) and then I turn on his crib music and he just lays down and goes to sleep. My experience with putting him to bed awake was very easy, but don't expect yours to be the same. The key is to just be consistent. If you say you are going to leave the room and let her cry for 15 minutes than stick to it. She may surprise you and not even cry at all, or it take a while. Just stay tough and know that a little crying is not going to hurt her. It will probably be harder on you than it is on her, trust me.

Lisa - posted on 08/20/2010

I also recommend the book The Baby Whisperer, we started this at birth with my son (9/3/09) ,he has always slept in his bed...for naps and bedtime, he's been sleeping through the night (about 9 hours) since he was 4 months old and it never involved crying. He's also always been a good eater and is growing fine.
I know from experience with my first child that habits like that are hard to break...my 10 year old is still afraid to sleep alone b/c we always let him sleep with us.
The Baby Whisperer is a great book and I think it will help you.

Tranda - posted on 08/19/2010

I've been trying too! My son likes to nurse all night, and I am so tired cause I don't get a good nights sleep. I am trying to ween him, but I am to tired at night to deal and give up and nurse. My husband works crazy hours so I don't get much help at night. My daughter started sleeping thru the night two nights after I stopped nursing.

Robin - posted on 08/19/2010

She will let you know when she is ready to become more independent - just be patient, it won't be forever! We let our 11 mth old son give up night feedings on his own, at about 8.5 mths he gave up the 5AM feeding and at 10.5 mths he gave up the 11:30PM feeding - we just offered the paci and he took it. We decided at 5-6 mths he was just too strong willed to give up on anything he wanted so we did not try to "cry out" for very long - 2-3 nights and always gave in. Our son has also never spent a night alone in his room up until last night - he always has co-slept or slept in the pack n play next to our bed (his room is downstairs - too far for comfort before) well it has been like a circus at night, in and out of the bed and pack n play, he tosses and turns in bed with me all night but then whines in the pack n play so after no sleep for several days I put him in his crib at 2AM and he was out faster than I could plug in the night light - last night when he woke in his pack n play at 11PM I took him downstairs to his crib and he slept soundly, and happily, until 6:30AM - this was our first real night of truly sleeping through the night!!!!! I had feared for so long the trauma of moving him to his crib....this was a huge surprise!

Jennifer Ann Saunders - posted on 08/19/2010

Having a night routine and going to bed at the same time is important. My son is still breastfed, but by sippy cup, and takes just a few ounces before bed. (We eat dinner around 6, then bath, play a little, and sleep by 730pm)



We started to put him down with no rocking a long time ago. He goes in the crib awake for night time and his two naps and plays with a toy and lays down when he is ready. He sleeps 10-12 hours at night and takes two 1+ hour naps each day.



It takes up to four nights to break a habit! And just a little patience. Good sleep habits are important!



Good luck!!!

Jamie - posted on 08/19/2010

We set up a routine with a set time to eat dinner, play afterwards, then read a book, change into a night-time diaper, then nurse in her room with the lights off, music playing and a fan for white noise (we don't have central A/C so it's a window unit right now). She falls asleep nursing and then transfers to her crib 9x outta 10 and sleeps until about 630a with maybe one wake up every week or so. Dont give up heart, this is a recent development with Lucy about a month ago. Before that she slept with us and woke 2-3x per night to nurse. It's all about what they are ready for I am convinced.

Briana - posted on 08/19/2010

Well is she teething? If she is it will be hard to put her to sleep even with rocking. I rocked my son to sleep every night but it did get old. He got heavier and the rocks got longer. So I just put him to bed, laid him in his crib after a quick cuddle and kiss goodnight, wrapped his blanket around his legs and left the room. He just went to sleep no problem, if she reacts with screaming and crying just let her til she goes to bed. Shes safe in her crib and she will soon enough know what she needs to do. But do not attempt to put her to bed than rescue her when she objects to this new routine. It will encourage her to scream till you come, you have to let her know that she cant get her way with this one. My son sleeps fine with no lights on but some babies are afraid of the dark. And there are nights that he doesn't want to go to bed and he will stand up and cry, so I go in and lay him down with no words or acknowledgement of his attempt to stay up and he gets the point and gets to sleep. It may be hard to break her of the habit, if she cries it will only last a few days. You know her cries, if it gets serious then don't let her be. I think the crying is harder on mothers than it is the babies. Its hard not to scoop him up every time he cries, I just don't have the arm strength. He's a big boy. Good luck!

Mastoora - posted on 08/18/2010

I give my daughter a bath and then she plays/ cuddles with me for about half an hour- 1 hour, then her milk in a bottle (bottle only at night, sippy cup during the day) and after I give her Tiger & dummy (for another month or so) and a blankie around her and she's out until 7-9 am.

Jeanine - posted on 08/18/2010

try reading the book The Baby Whisperer, it is an excellent book and it doesn't involve them crying hysterically by themselves. I don't rock my son to sleep anymore, but I do sit in the rocking chair and hold him, I just let him put himself to sleep and then he goes in his crib. We just started doing this and he finally starting to sleep through the night and he is 11 months old and he's been doing it for about a month now. Hope this works for you.

Cecilia - posted on 08/18/2010

I'm relieved to read I'm not the only one who co-sleeps and breastfeeds all night! Inés wants to feed up to 5 times a night, especially since starting nursery about 6 weeks ago. It's making me very tired but I think she is trying to make up for the time we're apart...

She used to sleep in the moses basket, then I moved her to the crib and she was fine. We only started co-sleeping when she grew out of that. She has a travel cot with a mattress in our bedroom, which she used to sleep in but now seems to hate. I find that if I get her to fall asleep in arms or on the BabyBjorn and she is absolutely exhausted I can move her to the cot, but otherwise she stands up and screams.

I am hoping to move her to her cotbed in her bedroom when I start feeding her formula, but for the time being I am happy to breastfeed at least until she's 1. In all honesty, co-sleeping is such a pleasure because I get to cuddle her and kiss her lovely face, but it's also so handy when you need to feed in the middle of the night. I always said I wouldn't do it but I ended up giving in!

Daisy - posted on 08/16/2010

My son is 11 months old and we usually rock him everynight to sleep, put him in his crib and yes he will wake up a few times at night but soon as that paci hits his mouth, he's out again and falls asleep on his own. He hasn't been sleeping well because he is teething (no teeth yet) but other than that we always rock him to sleep at 7:30 or 8pm and he's out. I tried the cry it out, i tried all the advice from all the professionals in the books and i even worried that he might be up in the middle of the night and we would have to rock him but no. None of that worked for us so we still rock him and we know that once he gets older rocking will be out of the question, but at least we get that cuddle time together...

CINDY - posted on 08/16/2010

MY DAUGHTER WHO IS 11 MONTHS OLD WHEN I PUT HER DOWN EITHER FOR BEDTIME OR NAP I MAKE THE ROOM NICE A QUITE AND DARK AND PEACEFUL THEN GIVE HER HER BOTTLE AND LAY HER DOWN YEAH SOMETIMES SHE WILL CRY NOT NOW REALLY BUT SHE USE TO BUT SHE GOT USE TO IT AND STARTED SLEEPING ON HER OWN SHE SLEEPS FROM 10 PM UNTIL 10AM SOMETIMES 11AM

Anna - posted on 08/16/2010

my daughter has slept in her own bed since she was four weeks old. breast feeding was not an option for me. i had to get up to make a bottle anyway and having her next to me, waking me with every noise wasnt helping. she was an awesome sleeper as a little baby, but over the last couple months she has gotten more difficult as i am trying to build a routine with bedtime and not just putting her down when she is dead tired. i give her a bottle between 7-8 and she is often half asleep by the time the bottle is empty, but if she hasnt fallen asleep she will stand in her bed and cry for a while. normally she falls asleep with in 10 mins, but if not i go to her, give her a kiss, tell her its sleepy time for little girls and that i love her and lay her back down. just to let her know im close by. i hope you find a way that works for you. good luck.

Rachell - posted on 08/15/2010

My son has always been super easy to put to bed. @ 6 weeks he was in his crib every night @ 9 in bed. He's almost one and nearly passes out if he's up past 9. You should try a routine...possibly feed then bath (we use the goodnight lavender bath stuff). I couldn't nurse so I don't know how that would work with sleeping...but for my son it's all about the routine. He's still on scheduled naps through the day. I agree with the other moms also...sometimes you just have to step away.

Emily - posted on 08/15/2010

I did the the same thing with my first child. When she was 15 months we tried to break it because we had another baby on the way. I put her in her crib awake, and of course she was hysterical. I would come in every five minutes or so, give her a hug while she stood in her crib, lay her back down, rub her back and then leave. She would stand back up screaming. I would just keep repeating the process until she would go to sleep. It took a week of this, until she was able to just go to sleep. She eventually got the idea. The key for us was to not pick her up, but I still wanted her to know I wasn't neglecting her or ignoring her. That week was a horrible week, but after we got through it, things were soo much better. Don't know if it will work for your baby, but it could be worth a try.

Jessi - posted on 08/15/2010

I'm not sure if you mean with or without being rocked. For my son, I have had him in his crib at bedtime since the beginning. That is one piece of advice my sister gave that I think is awesome. His routine is he gets in to his jammies, takes a bottle, we rock for a little bit and he goes to bed awake or semi awake. I also play a cd for him. It's called Calming Creek. He usually sleeps through the night, unless his teeth are bothering him or he's going through a growth spurt.



Since a lot of you started habits you're now starting to break, it will probably be hard for the both of you. You may need to stand firm and deny the baby things or help them through with what they want and not actually give it to them. It may be a long road, but it will be worse the longer you wait not to break the habit or change things around. I all depends on how you want to deal with it all. My mom and dad let me sleep with them and I was in their bed until I was 5. I STILL don't know how my sister was created. ;) I think my mom even made attempts to make me excited about sleeping in my own bed and it didn't work. Not sure what finally worked, maybe her saying. "You're a big girl, you're in school now, you need to sleep in your own bed."

Miranda - posted on 08/15/2010

My son is almost 11 months and is just now sleeping through the night..I stopped nursing him a little over a month ago and that seems have helped with him sleeping all night. I have a rutine with my son every night. I give him a bath at 7:30 then between 8 to 9 I go lay him in bed with some baby light that plays music and the first couple of days wasnt easy but now he just goes right to sleep. Good luck and I hope you figure out a way:)

Lauren - posted on 08/15/2010

I've found that taking my daughter up to her bedroom an hour or so earlier than bedtime helped. In that hour we read a few books (ones which she can point to and learn things from like if she touches the cow i say "moo" its also helped with word association) then if she's really restless I sit back with my knees up and rest her on them and play round and round the garden like a teddy bear (except she doesn't let you tickle her hand anymore she has to tickle mine lol) and a few other less hyperactive games that appear to tire her out a little and let her know that her bedrooms a fun place to be, she gets time with mummy and this has helped our routine, then I give her a bottle and sing to her gently (sweet child of mines a fave right now), it soothes lyss but also relieves some of my tension from the day if theres been any and it's helped our bond greatly. This way she's getting full on none interupted mummy time too and she loves that lol. If she doesn't go asleep with her bottle straight away then as hard as it is sometimes (e.g. not having more cuddles lol) I stay in the room and distract myself reading, she can still see me but this works for us and eventually she doses off. If she gets upset (and is not simply testing if she can get picked up and play again) then I give her a big cuddle a little sing song and then try again and repeat this as much as necessary. If it's her teething thats keeping her awake I try a little bonjela and if nothing else works she can have her duddy. I hope this helps, it took me a while and it wasn't easy but the whole hour or more when everything else gets pushed aside and it's just you n bubba time (or quiet family time) is beautiful. Hope this helped and I didn't waffle on too much xxxx

Tanith - posted on 08/15/2010

I breastfeed my son at bedtimes and within 5 minutes he's out. It's always worked well at nap times. But at the times that I don't put him to sleep like that, I got into the habit of leaving him in his crib with a pacifier. He preformed at first but just kept going back in and putting the pacifier back in his mouth and walking out again. He eventually got tired and fell asleep. Now I just put him in his crip with his pacifier and he goes straight to sleep.

Noreen - posted on 08/14/2010

I nurse my daughter to sleep. We also co-sleep. I have a 6 yr old and a 4 yr old sons who both got rocked to sleep until they were about 15months. We then started to use the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elisabeth Pantly and have not had any issues. They have both been sleeping on their own completly since they were 2yrs old. It doesn't last forever. Take advantage of it now because they grow way too fast.

Ori - posted on 08/14/2010

I'm having the same problem! Except my daughter wants to nurse all night. I nurse my daughter and rock her to sleep. We co-sleep. We've tried to put our daughter in her crib afterwords but she just wakes up and wants to nurse. My grandmother keeps her during the day and she just puts her in the crib and she goes right to sleep for her... not for me though! Sorry I do not have any answers for you other than to keep trying, thats what we're going to do.