i hate myself

Amanda - posted on 02/02/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )

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lately i have been hating myself. i get angry all the time at my husband for no reason and then want to go cry, i hate my body, within the last month i got a belly pooch and my son is 16 months old. i don't know what is wrong with me, or why i get so angry. i absolutely hate my job and am extremely jealous my husband gets to stay home w/ my son, due to work situations. i feel like i have no friends because we're all so busy with our lives. i have two questions for you

what can i do to get rid of my belly fat, pooch? we aren't talking just had a baby, we're talking it won't go away and i can't suck in.(i know this is part of why i hate myself, and i just signed my son up for a mommy and me swim class and have been looking for a 'mom' suit and can't stand it)

what can i do to release my tension or amy i depressed?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

[deleted account]

Are you on a birth control pill? I went on Micronor after having Heidi (the only pill approved for breast feeding mothers) and I became severely negative and irritated with my husband, specifically. Everything I thought about or saw seemed to have a dark cloud around it, and I only saw the bad sides of things. As soon as I stopped taking the pill, though, it was like I was seeing life through a new pair of eyes. So consider ANY type of medication you are currently on as a suspect. As a side note, before I got pregnant with Heidi, I was taking Evening Primrose Oil to help even out my PMS moods. I'm a redhead (no excuse, but still), so they were/are pretty severe! That really helped.



I suggest seeing your doctor to rule out postpartum depression and clinical depression, but PLEASE also consider a naturopath/homeopath. It could easily be something you are lacking in your diet, or even an allergy. Remember: anti-depressants and pharmaceuticals are NOT always the answer. They simply solve the SYMPTOM of the larger, underlying problem, which may be emotional or mental. Your doc may even be able to refer you to a good psychologist in your area. If that's not something you can afford, most communities have options for folks who can't afford it.



Other suggestions: yoga (even using an at-home DVD if you can't get to the gym), running/jogging, journalling, praying, and joining a support group at a local church or community centre are all good starting points.



I hope that helps, and that you start to see the light soon!

[deleted account]

Sadly i've dealt with weight and depression issues most of my life. And it seems more so after my son. I decided this year i was taking charge. I joined the gym (which is still HARD work for me) and i've taken up "body talk" sessions and "live smart" sessions to try and get to the root of my issues. I also decided to join a "book club" though they don't read much which suits me just fine. But it means an outing with some adults where we don't discuss our littlies. I'm hoping this will lift my moods.

Hang in there, Amanda, your not alone. But you need to find some outlet for yourself. Which isn't easy being a mom. And maybe think of changing jobs to something you will enjoy, or if possible a half day. It will give you more time with your son.

Good luck

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Jessica - posted on 02/04/2011

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ugh, don't i know it. i have all my skinny clothes hanging in my closet. i lost all the baby weight after two pregnancies and then some. three years 9 months ago i was a size four! then i got pregnant again and never lost a single pound... i weighed the same as when i went into the hospital to have my baby. i was a size ten. then i got pregnant again and gained a lot of weight, lost the weight and got down to a size ten again... then suddenly i gained a lot of weight and i am bigger than i ever have been not pregnant. people always ask me if i am pregnant. i will see myself in a full length mirror and it will take me a few seconds to realize that that is me! i am so fat! i forget that i am fat all the time when i am shopping or trying on clothes... i will grab something that used to be my size or would have looked really good on me before my last pregnancy and put it on to find out it doesn't fit or i look terrible in it... it is so depressing. i have the pooch.

User - posted on 02/04/2011

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I know that feeling well.just prior to becoming pregnant with my now 16 1/2 month old son i had managed to loose 35 lbs and only gaind 15 back during the pregnacy. then after my son was born i gaind an adiitional 50 lbs. Its very hard on the mind asnd body when ypu expect that ypu will loose the "baby" weight and then dont. I have recently ben diagnosed with Bipolor disorder for my depression and additional mood swings. I would sugest writing a journal for ypur mood swings and see if ypu can find what triggers them, talk to your husband as well as ypur Dr. and ya talk to ypur husband about the posibility of switching roles if the econnomy in your area has jobs that A) pay well enough. B) your husband is qualified for. C) are hiring.

Jessica - posted on 02/02/2011

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i gained a lot of weight after my daughter was born. i went down to size ten to a size 14 in a matter of weeks! i feel so bloated! i feel for you. i found a great suit with a skirt attached to it at walmart. i also found a great slimming suit (it is called that) that is a one piece and i put shorts with it.



it sounds like maybe your hormones are out of wack or you are having problems with your thyroid or you are depressed. being a mom and working all the time is hard. i feel for you. i would go to your doctor and get checked out. maybe anti depressants would help. maybe talking to a psychologist might help. i would try to get out of the house once or twice a month for a girls night out and also spend some one on one time with your son once a week... that might help. you could join a gym and go a few times a week before work or take your child with you, they usually have cheap daycare and it will help you feel better. if you can't afford a membership, the YWCA has great discounts based on incomes. you could also try a mommy and me class at an Early Childhood Center and meet other moms so you don't feel so lonely.



it is hard not to resent someone who spends so much time with something that you love so much. maybe have him look for a better job and switch roles so you can stay at home?



are you sure you aren't pregnant again??

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