How are you coping with your toddler and a new born?

Nomsa - posted on 11/13/2011

Thanks everybody. They really love each other and always play, not always nice but at least the animosity is gone. I think when he starts crawling things will be even better.

Juli - posted on 11/13/2011

Hi our new son is now 1 month old. Our Daughter (23 months old) is surprisingly good with him. Miss Kara trys to be a little momma to him yea she trys to pick him up, pokes at his eyes identifying them (she is learning body parts) trys to lay on him to cuddle up. just gotta remember she does not know better and does not understand/ know what can hurt him. I just include her in every thing, and wen I nurse him I have her climb on the couch and snuggle with us on the other side. When Little Ray is sleeping I spend extra attention to her and have her help in other ways (clean up her toys, throw trash and diapers away, hand me a diaper, bring me a book to read to her while holding the baby and even placing open diaper on my lap under babies bottom) makes her feel special and needed. I also refer to Him as our baby or her baby. she has only been jealous a couple times once over the baby swing and over my affection once or twice throwing hissy fits.

Christi - posted on 11/11/2011

Hi! Our new baby girl is 1 month old & have a 21 month old. At first, we had problems with jealousy & Maycee would hit the baby... Now, things are much better. Everytime she walks past her sister she has to pat her r lean down & kiss her! Include your toddler in changing, feeding, etc. Don't panic, things will get better! I wish you the best of luck!

Maya - posted on 11/09/2011

Make lots of play dates. That will occupy your 18 month old.

Holly - posted on 08/13/2011

Just give it time. My son did the same thing when we brought our littlest home too. My kids are about 15 months apart (oldest is 17 months and the youngest is 7.5 weeks). It took my oldest about 2 weeks to start getting used to the idea of a new baby. He wanted all the attention and would do anything he could to get it (including hitting the baby and trying to sit on him). What I found helps is if you get the older one involved more with taking care of the baby. You could ask the older one to get you a diaper or let him pull the wipes out of the container for you while your changing baby's bum. My son loves it when I let him shake the bottle to mix up the formula. Yes, some of the formula squirts out (cuz he doesn't know how to cover the hole in the nipple) but hey, at least he's happy and it's not that big of a mess. He also likes to lay on the floor with his little brother and talk to him. I sit with them to supervise and help. It's tough, but eventually they will get along. Just think of all the revenge baby is planning on big brother lol :) It gets better I promise.

Lori - posted on 08/03/2011

my boys are 19 months apart. I refer to my 7 week old as our baby. I encourage gentle hands and touching his feet and hands. He helps me by gathering diaper supplies when needed. Feeding time has become video time and that works for us so my older soon isn't in to all the no-nos because mommy can't play with him for a bit

Rebecca - posted on 07/25/2011

its okay. I have a 18 month old daughter and a month old son. My daughter wants to poke him and everything as well but she has gotten better since we have had him home. she stills pokes but we just tell her gentle or easy and she backs off. During the day its just me and my kids so i have no choice but to have them around eachother. The more you have your boys together the more your oldest will get used to the little one being there. best of luck

Rebecca - posted on 07/25/2011

i agree with chrystal- you may not want to hide the baby. its makes him a new discovery to check out instead of someone thats always there to big brother. i have 3 year old and a 6 week old boys and we were having a hard time with big bro (especially during feeding times because we're formula and breast feeding so he got confused about when he could help) but its gotten much better as time has gone on. perhaps your boys just need time (anything could happen in those 2 months before your sister leaves) and for big brother to learn how to be around a baby.
just try and be patient (not an easy task for me) and remember that big brother was until just a few weeks ago, an only child. he had 100% of your love and attention and is now being forced to share and my not understand why. we spent a lot of time with our son explaining that we weren't replacing him and that we were bringing another baby into the house because we loved him so much and wanted to give a new friend.
we also found that giving big bro his own baby doll to feed and burp and change has really really helped (a lot more than i thought it would) because he can do all the things mommy and daddy are doing without actually touching his little bro :)
be patient with him and with yourself. this is a new experience for everyone. good luck!!

Melissa - posted on 07/22/2011

It's okay. Your son will cope in time. My suggestion is to take some time to do something special with just your toddler. Read him a book, let him help with chores...let him feel like he is important and still special. I'm in your same boat. I have a 22 month old and a 1 month old. Your eldest is just worries that he won't be special to you anymore. Another thing to try (something that worked with my son) make him feel like the new baby is "his baby". Ask him to help you feel him, change his clothes, bathe him. My son loves to help with the new baby now. He even wants to help me burp him.

Chrystal - posted on 07/18/2011

I have a 13 month old and 5 week old. It sounds like your son is like mine; my son loves his little sister a bit to much too. He liked to poke eyes, pull feet, bear hug, pat to hard, and squeeze. It took patients and being vigilant to teach him what was the right way to show afftection to his little sister without discouraging the relationship. What we did was hold our sons hand and show him the way to pat and stroke the baby while telling him to be gentle and when he'd do something unacceptable like poke her face we'd tell him no and then show him again the right way to be affectionate. I still have to keep an eye on them of course but I feel comfortable not being right next to them all the time. I personally wouldn't try to keep them apart it just makes the baby more exciting to the other but that's just my opinion. Its gets better they just gotta get used to each other.

Heather - posted on 07/18/2011

I have a two and half year old boy. Zeke does show a little jealousy, but most of the time his sister Makiya (4 weeks) is HIS baby. He loves to kiss and hug her.

MEGAN - posted on 07/15/2011

I HAVE A 22 MONTH OLD AND A 2WK OLD. I HAVE HAD A FEW PROBS BUT NOTHING MAJOR. JUS GOTTA INSIST ON BEING CAREFUL AROUND THE BABY AND DONT LEAVE THEM ALONE UNATTENDED THINGS WILL GET BETTER IT JUS TAKES A LOT A WORK. IN FEW YEARS THEYLL BE AWSUM FRIENDS! MY DAUGHTER HAS HAD SUM TIMES A RUFF TIME ADJUSTING TO THE BABY BUT I JUS MAKE SURE AND DO THINGS AS I ALWAYS DID WITH HER BEFORE HIM. JUS NOW WE HAVE 3 INSTEADA THE 2 OF US =) I HOPE THINGS GET EASIER FOR YOU!!! BEST OF LUCK!

Stacey - posted on 07/10/2011

you be fine my girls are just under 15 months apart took my daughter bout 3 weeks to get used to her lil sis nw she gives her lots of cuddles an kisses still steals her dummie an slaps her now an then but hey thats wats sisters do ive been pretty much bye my self since i came home as my partner works al the time and i got cut open to get baby out so was in heaps of pain to joys of being a mother a! good luck hun!