Kari - posted on 02/25/2009 ( 15 moms have responded )
So i have a problem. Im about 4months pregnant with my first. Lately the topic of the babys last name has come up with my parents. When i told them i want the baby to have its fathers last name, they got mad and told me theres pretty much no discussion about it, that the baby will have my last name. My mom feels its easier to make it his last name later than it is to change it to mine down the road. They keep thinking we wont work out, and they dont want the baby to have his last name if it doesnt work. I feel like even if we dont work out, its STILL his baby. What does not having his last name change? How do i tell them without starting a fight that its my baby and my decision? I havent even told my boyfriend about this convo. I know it will crush him.
My other dilemma is that after i told my parents i was pregnant, i said we were going to be looking for places to live and that i was gonna be moving out soon. They told me not to worry about moving out and to save money and just stay home. I never asked her if i could stay home. I havent asked her for ANYTHING. But every time something comes up about the baby and things that it will need, if i dont agree with what she wants to buy her response is "whos house are you living in? whos paying for it?" lately its diapers. She found eco-friendly ones and when she told my brother about them she said "yea, i think those are the ones we are gonna use" and i just said "we?" and that was the response i got. again, i have never asked for anything. i told her from day one i dont expect anything from her or my father. I wish i could just move out, but i really cant afford it right now. any ideas on how to talk to her?