my one year-old- child slaps me!!!!

Allison - posted on 02/22/2011

I've been having the same problem and it seems none of my friends children have done this. It helps seeing other moms have the same issues. I was beginning to wonder why mine will be intentionally mean to me. I do the same thing with "I don't like hitting I like kisses". Now if she does randomly hit me she corrects herself then gives me a kiss.

Kalleen - posted on 02/21/2011

It's been a month since i replied to this post and if it helps anyone, the slapping has stopped! I believe that it's just a phase and now i feel dumb for getting all worked up about it. BTW I started using the "We give kisses we don't hit" so maybe that's what stopped it I'm not sure.

Chrissy - posted on 01/25/2011

Just because your son slaps you, doesn't mean he's "violent." The only way this could be a violent act is if he has ever seen someone hurt someone else (whether it be in real life or on TV). Your son will not become a violent person just because of this, he is just playing! Do not worry it is very normal! It's all part of growing up and discovering the world around him. My son does this too, but always with a smile on his face, there is nothing malicious behind it.

Kalleen - posted on 01/24/2011

I'm having the same problem and am about to lose my mind. If he's mad he slaps, if he's happy he slaps, If he's indifferent he slaps. One time he woke up from a dead sleep just to slap my face and then go back to sleep!!! What is that??? funny but I need to have it stopped. I've ignored it, Grabbed his hand nicely and stroked my face and said Nice Nice, I've grabbed his hand strong and sternly said, NO NO HITTING!, I've looked him in the eye and said "We don't hit" I've tried it all! He doesn't seem to care that it bothers me. I'm hoping to teach him how to sign better and maybe that'll help and I'm definitely going to try the "We give kisses" method. We'll see

Natasha - posted on 10/19/2010

My DH has started slapping/hitting as well. I grab her hand to stop her and tell her "we don't hit, we give kisses". She's learned that she gives me a kiss instead.

Melissa - posted on 10/19/2010

Cat: I firmly disagree with your technique. 1 year olds are naturally curious and explorative with their hands, they do not know what is or is not appropriate to touch. Of course boundaries have to be established, but there are many alternate and more effective ways of setting rules other than physical punishment. Like you said "repition is the key" however, I believe our job as moms is to teach our babies what is and is not allowed, instead of "showing them who is in charge".

One reason babies this age scream is because of frustration, and by being "firm with him when he screams aswell, let him know that it is not acceptable" you are telling him its not ok to express himself. Instead, I think it's more effective and beneficial to give our babies alternate and appropriate ways of expressing themselves (ie sign language).

With a toddler running around, there are bound to be things that are off limits in your home, but it will make life much easier if your child is given safe places to explore his environment without hearing "no" every two seconds.
There has been a lot of research done on the negative consequesnces of ANY type of physical punishment, and although we have to make the decision we feel is best for our own children, I would suggest you take a look at this link.
http://nogreaterjoychildren.wordpress.co...

Mariam: There are two ways to stop a undesired behaviour in a toddler. They are called the two "I's" The first one is to ignore the behaviour, which you have obviously done with no success. The second one is to Isolate the behaviour to teach the child specifically, what is not acceptable. The key here is being consistent, every single time he slaps you, pick him up with his back facing you and isolate him (this may be in a crib, playpen or another area he cannot get out of himself) Leave the room for about 30 seconds and leave him alone without saying anything to him. He will most likely scream. After the 30 seconds pick him up and continue on with your day. If he slaps you again, repeat. At 13 months there is no sense in trying to reason, you simply have to let him know his actions have consequences.
I think after a few days you will see a big difference. Remember, the key is being consistent so there is no confusion as to WHY he is being isolated. Also, extended time outs are useless becasue children this age will not even remember why they are being disciplined, keep it short.
Good luck and let us know how things go.

Chrissy - posted on 10/19/2010

I read that they enjoy the noise it makes and that its a "new thing"...it should be just a phase, keep doing what you are doing by not reacting to it, and he will grow out if it sooner than you think. Maybe offer him a toy that needs to be slapped, like a tamborine!

Cat - posted on 10/19/2010

Be firm with him when he screams aswell, let him know that it is not acceptable. If u dont be firm now he will be alot harder to deal with as he gets older

Cat - posted on 10/19/2010

My daughter always picks up things shes not allowed, i tell her no and if she doesnt put it down i tell her firmly again. she has now learnt that if i say no it means no and she wont touch what shes going for. If she ignores me and continues doing it i tell her no and give her a little smack her on the hand. When i take something from her i tell her "ta for mum", now if i say ta for mum she gives it straight to me and shes not even a year old yet. repition is the key and u need to show them who is in charge.