discipline for a 9 month old

Kara - posted on 09/06/2010

I am having the exact issues with my son. He is also starting to bite now that he has 2 upper teeth all the way in. I don't know how to remedy it, I say my "big scary" No.. then give him something to chew on.. and when he does chew on it I give him praise... (feels like I'm trying to train a dog not to chew.. ). But he laughs at me when I say NO. Or.. if I get even louder, he cries.. which breaks my heart. **sigh**

Samantha - posted on 09/06/2010

I have a degree in early childhood and while I'm having the same problem you have to remember they know exactly what you are saying. Redirecting is the best thing to do and will continue to use this through growing years. Redirection is the best thing to do.

Melanie - posted on 09/03/2010

well hes too young to use the scarey voice on because most likely he will just think its funny. the best thing you can do is move things he shouldnt be into out of reach for now. no is just not a concept hes ready to get at this age. but you can tell him no in a calm but firm voice and redirect him. find him something else you deem safe to occupy him. like hand him his toy phone when you take away yours. etc...

Crystal - posted on 09/01/2010

my little girl is the same. shes 9 mnths. she gets into everything. I tell her no and she does it anyway. my husband says it and she listens to him. I think its because I cant get my voice as deep as his. she pulls hair, hits, screams, as well as, eat dogs food, crawl away from me. her pediatrician said consistency is the key. thats all you can do at this age.

Kelli - posted on 09/01/2010

Discipline is not everyone's favorite thing to do. My husband and I do believe in it. Our 9 month gets a spat on the leg. Just enough to get her attention. She already knows what "no" means and what not to get in to, but sometimes her curiosity gets the better of her. For now just make sure everything that can hurt him is out of reach. Distract him with something more positive to keep you from saying "no" too much. A favorite toy, book, cooking (plastic) utensils, etc. Something new helps sometimes. Our lit' girl loves cooking utensils. Best wishes.

Bethany - posted on 08/31/2010

Babies may begin to understand what the word, no! means at 9 months but they may not be able to obey it just yet. Children usually begin blatant disobedience around 18 months until then, when their understanding develops, discipline can be hit or miss.

Tiffany - posted on 08/31/2010

OH, I know the feeling. My first wasnt a climber or really into a whole lot so it wasnt to bad. With her we used the big play yard opened up and blocked her from leaving the living room. I'd do it again but then I'd be stuck lifting my 2 yr old over the gate a million times a day. My 9 month old on the other hand is into everything and is a climber! She climbs over, and inbetween everything LOL. I do the same as most of you and put on my mommy voice and tell her NO but she just smiles and goes back to what she was doing. I love it tho, cause I cant help but smile back and move her away from the situation.

Rebekah - posted on 08/31/2010

My twin girls are the same. I asked my pediatrician about what I should do and she said that disciplining them is going to do nothing. They dont yet understand "if I get into that again, I will get in trouble".

Sabrina - posted on 08/31/2010

They are definitely old enough to understand "No" my son has understood since he was 6 months old. I slap him on his hand not enough to hurt him but just enough to teach him. & now when i say no he understand it usually ends with him throwing himself on the floor and crying for a total of 5 seconds but he definitely knows what "No" means. I also try and praise him when he listens to the command by saying Thank you! or something along those lines.

Terilyn - posted on 08/31/2010

Lord only knows... Its not just a character builder for little missy but for parents too. When my little one TRIES a tantrum I glance at her and firmly yet lovinly when I see that she has stopped... The kisses of achievement. Begin!

Sarah - posted on 08/31/2010

Looks like all 9 month olds are the same then! My little girl just looks at me when I say 'NO' in my grown up voice - I can tell she knows what I mean. I thinks its amazing how she can find little bits of fluff or a tiny little stone which I can't see and all the time I'm walking towards her she's looking at me and then looking at the tiny object in her hand and I can tell she's about to put it in her mouth.

Samantha - posted on 08/30/2010

I started "no" at 4 months when he started crawling. I used the method where you associate no with pain. I little "flick" to the hand. Now he knows no and obeys it. Occasionally I have to tell him 2 or 3 times. But by the 3rd time he listens. I dont yell or use a different voice. I just lower it a bit and say no. Unless he is threatening his life by getting into something dangerous like dog food or slamming the glass door on our Entertainment stand. Then I break out the paniced NO NO NO. He knows then to stop right then and there. The drs. say not to use any pain association but he is happy and I only had to do that for about 3 days when he got the idea that no means ouch! He is still happy and healthy!

Melissa - posted on 08/30/2010

I would continue to tell him no, so he will eventually learns and give him something new. if you have to move him, move him and tell him no dont do that, here play with this instead. and he should, start to understand when he is about uh 30 that you do know what you are talking about and will then listen to you! haha. but that is what i do with my daughter tell her no and move her to play with/get into something that is safe for her.

Kristine - posted on 08/30/2010

OMG.....i dun think we can all do much there,,,my 9month old baby girl does the same thing she knows what no is...but she'll look at me and smiles and carries on....yeah like you i end up picking her up and away from it....

but i was thinking of buting those play cage, i dun know what they are exactly called but its like a cot but bigger so they could just move around in that area where you fill it up with toys....

Sidra - posted on 08/29/2010

i need help too, my baby has the biggest tantrums ever as well..i heard they dont understand until the age onf one. how true is that?

Latha - posted on 08/29/2010

Like Mama Y and Stephanie.. I started saying NO! CANNOT! and tap my LO since he is 6 months. It does work at times... :) am sure it will in long run..

Brittany - posted on 08/28/2010

I do time outs. We have a mini hall between the bathroom, our bedroom and the living room. I just close the bathroom and bedroom doors and shut the gate to the living room and place her there.

I let her cry for about a minute then get her, if she calms down sooner I get her then.

A lot of times just setting her on the floor works (like if she's pulling hair).

Sue - posted on 08/28/2010

As some other people have said, you need to be consistent. It's only with repetition that he'll get the idea. Always try a stern voice first, and if he persists then I give a little smack on the hand sometimes. I worked as a Behaviour Specialist with secondary kids, so I'm used to dealing with much older children!... but I do have one thing to pass on to help keep you sane.... Just remember that it's a child's JOB to test the boundaries, and it's our job to set them, and keep enforcing them. Children feel most secure when they know where the limits are. So don't feel like a mean Mummy if you need to discipline him (in whatever way you choose), but also don't always opt for distraction (especially as they get older), as there is not much of a lesson learnt that way. Children do need to learn what NO means. Good luck!!

Monica - posted on 08/27/2010

9 Months is still too young to be genuinely disciplining. When they're around a year and able to walk is when they will be more likely to actually be able to understand cause/effect and realize that doing certain things is wrong. At this point as others have said, it's all about boundaries - say "no!" firmly and redirect, but too young for hitting or things like that because they won't understand why you're hitting them. Right now it's not an act of defiance, their brains aren't developed enough to be capable of defiance yet. Give it a few months :) For now it's just the exhausting task of constantly redirecting them away from dangerous situations. GL!

Jennifer - posted on 08/26/2010

Once again, my son is the same way. It's just the age. I tell him NO in my "mommy voice", sometimes it works, sometimes he just laughs at me and continues with what he's doing and I have to get him and move him somewhere else. All part of the territory. Hoping this phase doesn't last long....lol I continue to tell him NO when he does something wrong, even though he doesn't understand, because eventually, he will. My son also likes to smack, and poke, and scratch at my face when we're playing. So I take his hand away and tell him NO. I think that's really all you can do for now. Keep telling them NO until they start understanding, and make sure where they are playing is as baby safe as possible, and always keep your eyes on them.

Sheri - posted on 08/25/2010

at this age, babies are testing limits. your job is to give them the boundaries they need. someone else said it - consistency is key. they will eventually understand all those "no's" but you have to be consistent. i read brazelton on discipline.

Cherie - posted on 08/25/2010

well, my little man would get told "no thank you" by a couple people at the same time. that seemed to make the biggest impression on him. He actually got embarrased when me and his daddy would say at the same time. Now he actually listens pretty well- good enough that the grandparents made an observation of it- but not all the time of course. Good luck!

Rontae - posted on 08/25/2010

I would love to know as well, my son throws some serious tantrums, screams, bites and hits me to get his own way at 9 months.

Leslie - posted on 08/24/2010

I have the same problem with my little guy! He loves to go and try to play with my Glade plug ins in the outlet. I tell him no and he just gets a big grin on his face. I take him away from it and he goes right back to it. And I do the same thing. It takes a little bit, but eventually he figures out that mom is just going to keep taking him away. Consistency is key. They may not understand totally now, but I advise to start consistency early. I have a 4 and almost 7 year old and we haven't always been consistent with their discipline so they test the waters with mom and day. My oldest understands for the most part what is expected of him, but my 4 year old, if I'm not consistent in my discipline with her she runs all over me..or at least tries to. So with the baby, I was not going to make the same mistake with discipline. It's a whole lot harder when they are older to try to implement discipline if you didn't start right away. I also don't spank/hit hands. I read somewhere that that actually deters them from exploring. I have used it in the past with my older two and it didn't help anyway!

Brandy - posted on 08/24/2010

It is good for a baby to go exploring, thats how they learn, unless of course, he is getting into something that will hurt himself. I recommend not having babygates up all the time unless it is by steps. It is good for them to go through drawers and cabinets and play with the pots and pans. Again that is how they learn. I know it is a pain to always walk behing them and pick things up. Like today, we have a stand with all our movies on it and my son took off all the movies and was playing with them for like a half hour. As long and he was content I didn't care.

Stephanie - posted on 08/24/2010

I just give my lil mans hand a good tap and say no in a stern voice. However, I use the the tap on the hand at last resort. He listens pretty well to the stern no most of the time. I hope this helps you!

Mama.Y - posted on 08/24/2010

heyas. hmm. well for me, i usually smacks my lil girl hand n says uhuhuh, NO firmly when she reach outs/grab smth she shldnt..
slowly, she learns that when i go uhuh. or raise my hand, or say no. she should stop. hope this helps? haha.
but of cos, there are times where she refuse to listen! haha.

Melanie - posted on 08/23/2010

We have been using 'no thank you' with our son. He is a character, and the twinkle in his eye leads me to believe there will be much trouble coming. The more he goes back to it, and the more you say it and take the thing away, he starts to understand. If he isn't focusing on me, I will move him to somewhere else and distract him with something else. But I think that he is starting to pick up on it and may be starting to understand what it means. Good luck!

Mary - posted on 08/23/2010

We have the same problem, we have 2 animals and somehow she can find any piece of hair on the floor and eat it. Someone told us that every time she does something that we do not want her to to tell her no then give her a good alternative. Example- give her a toy she can play with or something that is OK for her to eat. It seems to help somewhat but she is still just 9 mths and flashes that adorable grin thinking it will be ok.

Kimberley - posted on 08/23/2010

my wee girl is the same, she thinks shes playing when she scratches your face, bites, goes in to things, ect so i have started to say no to her in a stern voice and she stops it but when my partner says no not nice to her she just smiles and laughts at him and carries on

Ashra - posted on 08/23/2010

HI there,
I like the rest of you, am having the same problem right now. My 9 month old son is after everything including the table lamps. My MIL told me not to worry about trying to discipline him, but I tried to anyhow. I said no in my 'mom' voice and he looked at me and began to pout, so I've continued to and it seems to work. I just say no or stop and sometimes add a clap and he stops what he's doing long enough for me to turn in him the other direction. Hope it helps!

Candice - posted on 08/23/2010

our lg is the same! she throws things off of her changing table and goes for the laptop power supply all the tie...she just laughs at you when i put on my mommy voice and say 'no'! when is the right time to start seriously disciplining them? when do they understand what is right and wrong? xxx

Sarah - posted on 08/23/2010

That One Is Pretty Tough. You Just Have To Make Sure That Your Home Is Baby Safe. Make Sure That He Can't Get Into Cabinets, Drawers, Etc. You Could Put Him In His Playpin & Give Him Toys To Play With. Put Baby Gates Up As Well.

Leah - posted on 08/23/2010

Sorry, Hun, I think we're all outta luck there lol. My son does the same thing! I'll say his name, he'll look at me and I'll say no, he'll flash me a huge smile and continue on. So hard not to smile back though! My oldest daughter (she's 3 1/2) wants me to put him in a time out, probably so its fair, when he does something wrong, he gets a time out as well. I just don't think they're old enough to understand at this point, but I keeping saying 'NO', because one day he will understand. Part of being a nine month old is getting into everything and exploring, I just keep him safe and contained in the living room where I know its all safe exploring. Good luck. Hopefully someone else has a more helpful post! :D