anyone else' MIL driving them crazy?!

Neva - posted on 08/23/2012

I symphatise. Stand your ground now or you'll suffer her intrusions well after the baby is born. It is shocking to me how some turn the birth of their child in to a circus (not saying that's you). I couldn't suffer the presence of anyone but my partner at any of my labours. You hubby will have to decide who he is married to, I'm sorry but in this condition you shold be an absolute priority to him. Sit him down and tell him that her 'remarks' are ruining your pregnancy and stressing you out, don't stop until he gets it. She is his mother and it's OK to be excited but this is ridiculus. Also keep in mind that you are a bit more sensitive in you condition as well which again doesn't mean she can behave the way she does.

best of luck

Amie - posted on 08/06/2012

Oh you poor thing!!! Im really close to my mil but..... Its my father in law that drives me bonkers! When we had our daughter i offending him greatly by saying your not coming!! I told everyone that when i went into labour i wanted it as calm and as stress free as possible. No fuss! He was adimit that he was going to be there but i had to put my foot down. I told everyone that we would let them know when they can come up because we wanted our own moment with our new bub. Its such a personal and intrusive moment that i didnt want others to witness. I couldn't bare to think about being butt naked, squeezing out a watermelon infront of anyone but my partner and nurses....
You need to get your partners support though. It will get worse. Ignore her comments about the name, turn it around and make an assertive joke that when the has another child then feel free to name it anything she likes. You need to put the foot down now though. Don't give her opportunity to question it just make a firm point that no visitors etc and shell catch on. When would get frustrated once the babies were born, id go and nurse them quietly in my room with the door shut. This is your baby, you enjoy it. She has had her turn. Maybe give her some little jobs to do so she feels included and make it regular eg. Thursday's the gets to walk the baby in the pram around the block while you get some rest or catch up on house work. Goodluck.

Nicole - posted on 07/31/2012

Put your foot down now or it will probably get worse once your little bub is born!! YOU are having this baby NOT her, and your husband should be supporting his pregnant wife not intrusive mother!

Jennifer - posted on 07/27/2012

Oh Honey! MIL's can be a big, fat, pain! This is your pregnancy and the decisions are yours and his to make. Sounds like "Mom" is very excited, but unable to see where she is crossing the line. Hang in there and discuss with your sweetie what is acceptable and what is not. Make those lines clear in a kind way. YOU and your Sweetie pick his name. Choose whatever you want. He is, after all, YOUR child. She'll get over it. Don't allow her to bully you. It is nice she wants to be a part, but taking over is NEVER OK. If you can, find a way to let her know her comments are hurtful or inappropriate. Also, try not to broadcast your symptoms any more than you have to. It will save the headaches of additional comments. I know it's hard to know what to say or how to react. Just remember, you are an ADULT who is capable of making your own choices. Listen to her suggestions and then do what you want. Hang in there!

We had to set firm ground rules regarding several things when we had our daughter. It is a struggle to stay consistent with boundaries and do it kindly, but it makes life SO much nicer when you feel you have been heard.

I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom! You may want to record her talking to your little guy and get the stories and things she wants to share with him. He will have them for the future and will know what a wonderful woman she is and that she loves him.