Is it ethical to have a registry without a baby shower?

Maureen - posted on 03/24/2010 ( 10 moms have responded )

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We had a baby shower for my son a year ago and we have a registry set up for our daughter who is due in July. She will be the first girl in the family in about ten years, so no one has anything girly. I don't know if we should have a registry with no baby shower. It is a small registry with clothes and such on it and it has NO big things like cribs or bouncers or anything. Or should I have a little get together not really a baby shower????

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SummerDawn - posted on 03/24/2010

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It is not always necessary to have a BABY Shower--but I was reading in Fit Pregnancy (June/July 2008 magazine) about having a "shower" for the mother to be--it was a great article. Maybe you could have an announcement get together/party--everyone loves to come to a party--where's the food??--So do what feels right--and ask around to your family members--see what they can afford to do and then go from there. I wouldn't worry so much about what is "ethical" but beneficial for your family and the new baby to come!! :-) Blessed Be!!

Staci - posted on 03/24/2010

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I did a registry for my 2nd too since it's the opposite gender as my first...mainly bc I wanted to get the coupon for 15% off all that remained on my registry. I had a friend throw me a really small 10 person, friends-only, shower and got some of the stuff. I would have registered with or without a shower though just for the savings on all my necessities.

Pam - posted on 03/26/2010

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I'm having my third child in May. I have 2 boys already and this is a surprise. I created an on-line registry with Babies R Us basically as a wish list/needs list for myself. If someone happens to buy something then great. But I use it mainly for me and the coupon you get after the birth towards what's left isn't bad either.

Where i live people have such big families that you don't usually get a shower given for you for any kids past your first. And I don't feel up to throwing one for myself right after having given birth....I'm tired.

Amy - posted on 03/25/2010

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What might be nice, is shortly after the baby is born, have a little get together with family (and or friends), that way it's more to show off the new adorable girl then about getting big gifts. If we have a girl we will most likely have a registry set up at least, but if it's another boy we don't need (or really want) anything more since we kept everything from our first (and we had more than we needed!).

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Allie - posted on 03/30/2010

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agreed.. if someone wants to give you a gift and does nt want to jsut ask you what you wnat/need they can look.. or it can jsut be notes to yourself like a wish-list... there is nothing wrong about it! they ask you when the baby is due.. not when the shower is.. many people only get gifts after their baby is born anyhow... why get something you already have enough of? you are not lying.. you are having a baby. that's the requirement for a baby registry... :)

Michelle - posted on 03/27/2010

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I think it is a great idea for those who would like to help you out , or have no idea what gift to buy you . At the very least I think most moms do it for the coupons , mailing lists and little amt of freebies you get when you register . Some places have been known to give small gift card amounts .

Cynthia - posted on 03/27/2010

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I think that is perfectly fine to have another registry. I would even have another shower. I have a huge family and we always have baby showers if the babys are a different sex or if they are 4 years or more apart.

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Why are you not having a shower?? Unless your a family member or really good friend I probably wouldn't send anything unless there was a shower. Your friends and family want to see the baby, have a little party after the baby is born so everyone can visit and you can receive the gifts you want as well.

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I know several people who put a registry together for second and third kids with no shower, just let people know who the registry is through.

Niki - posted on 03/24/2010

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how come you dont want a party? if its because your having a bad pregnency, tired etc etc - then im sure people will understand that, and just bring you gifts when they meet your baby, registrys are great as then people know what would really be appreciated. Personally I cant wait to get all my girls together, eat yummy food, do girly things, have a dance and celebrate being pregnent!! dont get stuck on the idea that a baby shower has to be a certain way, make it into whatever you want/need

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